Jupiter and I had spent all day at the salon having my hair stripped of the brown dye I've used for years. It was almost scary to see how close the hair dresser was able to get to my natural blonde color. She'd left my hair in soft waves and I was kind of excited to see what Maddox's reaction would be. I was surprised when I saw the finished results. I'd been putting aside little bits of money to be able to do this.
I looked like I did coming to New York, except I'm missing the naiveté I once had. I've really changed my life, and I have Maddox to thank for that. Without him, I probably would still be unhappy with Noah.
Jupiter had to meet Alex for dinner, and it gave me the idea to surprise Maddox by getting his favorite takeout. He'd called me earlier and asked if I was coming over tonight so he at least knew I was coming.
The doorman smiled at me as he's grown used to my comings and goings the past few months.
I caught my reflection in the elevator mirrors on the ride up to Maddox's place, and I have to say that this is a change I didn't know I needed. I feel less like the person I became with Noah. It's a good feeling. But what if it's too blonde? Maybe I should have done a different color? One that is less drastic.
I knock on the door first before going in since he'd left it unlocked for me. "Hey Maddox I brought a surprise," I sing walking into the kitchen. What I didn't expect to see was Maddox and Dean watching a hockey game on the television. He never said anything about Dean coming over tonight? Plus if Jupiter and I are off, so shouldn't he be at the bar?
"What is it?" He asks, not turning to look as they're both engrossed into the screen. I scoff and roll my eyes, walking over to lean over the back of the couch to press my lips against Maddox's cheek. His stubble is scratchy, but it gives him an edgy appearance so I don't mind it.
"Cass just give us a second, the game is almost-What the hell?" Dean asks shocked, causing Maddox to turn his head quickly, knocking our foreheads together.
"Oh shit," Maddox claims, rubbing the spot on his head before his mouth hangs open. "Wow."
It's my hair. He doesn't like it.
I try not to let it get to me, but it feels like a blow to the chest. I stand up and force a smile on my face, "I just thought it would be good to mix things up. There's sandwiches on the island, sorry Dean. I didn't know you were here, or I would have ordered you one."
They're both just staring at me in shock. While I knew it would surprise Maddox, this wasn't the reaction I had expected. I walk back towards the kitchen, pulling my hair back into a bun so the product of what I'd done isn't hanging in my face.
So what if he doesn't like it? It's not his hair. It's mine and I can do whatever the hell I want.
I feel Maddox's strong arms wrap around my torso, "Thank you for getting dinner. Dean just wanted to stop by and watch some of the game before his shift at the bar. Playoffs start soon."
"No problem, I'm glad to see that you're spending time together." I try to keep the hurt out of my voice as I try to wiggle out of his grip.
Maddox doesn't let me slip away though, "You're lucky Dean is here, or we wouldn't have the chance to eat dinner. I think I'd like to go straight to dessert instead." His low voice sends shivers through me.
"You're being silly."
"I'm being serious. My god Cassidy, I think you underestimate the effect you have on me." He teases lightly, and a real smile makes an appearance on my face. My heart skips a beat hearing him say that, but I'm not forgetting what happened a minute ago after two comments.
"Good to know," I say, taking the box that holds my order out of the takeout bag. Maddox presses a kiss to the top of my head before unraveling his arms.
He studies me with a smile on his handsome face, "Why did you put your hair up? It looks better down."
So maybe he does like it? I like it, but it's also a major change. "I just kinda put it up," I shrug, taking a seat on one of the barstools.
Dean jumps off the couch, whooping happily. "Hey, you just missed a buzzer beater." He wanders out here and peers curiously at me, "Is there a particular reason you decided to go blonde?"
"Well I am a natural blonde. I figured it's a good time for a change. You're making a big deal out of this, and it's not supposed to be." I point out sarcastically, and he rolls his eyes. "Don't you have a shift to get to? John is strict on punctuality."
"It was just a question," His hands go up in surrender as Maddox elbows his sides after moving to the other side of the island. "Regardless of the reason, it looks really good. It fits you better. But I think I need to get to the bar, or John will take my head off."
"Thanks Dean. That's probably a good idea. He's odd about punctuality," I chuckle before taking a bite of my sandwich.
"I'll walk you out, be back in a second Cass," Maddox smiles at me. I give a small wave before setting my food down, deciding that I don't have much of an appetite anymore.
I would be lying if I didn't admit I was disappointed to see Dean here. Maddox has been busy with work the past few days so I haven't seen him much. I was looking forward to spending time with him tonight.
I know that Dean is leaving, but its that Maddox didn't tell me he'd be here. I'm most definitely overthinking this, and there's no reason for me to be overthinking it. I just can't help it. Then my thoughts turn elsewhere.
What if my hair was actually a mistake? Did I just waste all that money on my hair? I should have just left it alone; the color was fine before. What if this is me changing myself again for a guy that could just leave? Not that I think Maddox would do that, but I don't know. I didn't think of it that way before I did it, but what if that's what it is?
"As weird as it is to enjoy spending time with him again, I have no problem admitting that he stayed a bit longer than he should have tonight. I'd hoped that once he saw you, he would have left. Dean got it eventually," Maddox jokes, coming back into the kitchen. I fold my hands under my legs on the stool, quickly blinking back the tears I hadn't realized formed.
"He did get it, I think," I reply unenthused.
Maddox's face immediately shifts into one of concern. "Baby, what's wrong?"
"Nothing."
He frowns, and comes over immediately. "What is it? Don't try the whole nothing thing either because you're about to start crying."
I bite my bottom lip to keep it from trembling. My eyes shift away from him to my sandwich, "I don't know if I like my hair."
Maddox's arms immediately wrap around me, pulling me into his safe embrace. "I think it looks great. It brings out the blue in your eyes more, and it just seems more you."
I can feel some of the tears slip down my cheeks as I rest my head on his chest, "I know I'm being stupid. It's already done, I'm just worried that-I don't even know what I'm worried about."
"If you really don't like it, then it's just hair. You can always change it back," Maddox comforts, and he is right. It's just hair.
"I know, I'm sorry," I apologize, pulling away to wipe my eyes.
He smiles gently, and brushes a short strand back from when I messily pulled it up. "There's no reason to apologize. It's a big change and quite frankly I'd be more worried if you held how you were feeling in."
The different sides to Maddox continue to surprise me, even though I know they shouldn't. "Thank you," I say softly, causing Maddox to shake his head.
"You don't have to thank me, you've been more than patient enough with me that I should be thanking you."
I stand slowly, and press a sweet kiss to his lips. "How about we put a movie on and just accept that both of us are hot messes?"
Maddox nods in agreement, "I think that's a great idea. I'll put the food in the fridge for later."
I wander back to his room, pausing slightly as I pass the guest bedroom. That room is Maddox holding onto the person Paige was. I don't blame him for it, but I certainly won't ask him to go in there again. He seems to be doing well, but I also don't want to push him. I change quickly out of the outfit I wore to work earlier into one of Maddox's t-shirts.
It's a dress on me, but he's grown used to me stealing his shirts when I'm over here. I do a double take walking in front of the mirror again, before slowly pulling my hair out of the ponytail to let it fall over my shoulders. I think I was worrying for nothing after all.
Maddox is sitting on the couch scrolling through movies, and his blue eyes drift over to me when a smirk forms on his face.
"What?" I ask, referring to his smirk, and he shakes his head chuckling.
"Absolutely nothing. What kind of movie are you in the mood for?"
I shrug before sitting and curling into him. "Whatever you'd like to watch, I just want to spend time with you."
His arm goes around me and I listen to the comforting beating of his heart. "We don't have to watch a movie if you don't want to. I'm happy to just sit and talk about anything and everything." If it was anyone else saying that, I think I would have laughed. But knowing Maddox, he's doing his best to be open with me. That's something that I know doesn't come easy to either of us.
I glance up at him smiling, "Hey Maddox?"
"Yeah?"
I hesitate thinking about saying it before ultimately changing my mind at the last second, "I'm really glad I met you."
"Even though I caused you to spill wine on your dress?"
A laugh escapes my mouth, "Yes, even though you ruined my dress."
His smile reaches his eyes, "I think I still owe you a new one if you never cashed the check."
"What exactly do I need a dress for? It's not like they get every day wear, plus I made enough that night to cover the cost of the dress without Noah realizing. All has been forgiven."
"Well are you free this Saturday? Hayes asked me earlier today if I would cover an event for him. He wants to surprise Sephine with a weekend trip to Italy."
I smile widely at that, "She's going to love that."
Maddox chuckles, "Yes, that's kinda the point. So will you go with me?"
I pause as if I actually have to think about it, "I think I can make some room in my schedule for you."