Tw: Mentions of death, murder and sadness. If you honestly don't wanna deal with this I'm sorry, plus this stupid chapter isn't working... sorry for the spam
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The world is a dark place. The color is gloomy and everything can disappear with the bright sun exploding. Maybe even a train ramming itself through a building and breaking it down. There's some good things in this life, like him.
Luca Balsa, you met him a few years ago and just last month he asked you out. Of course to be an official couple in the town you needed two dates. So the two of you went on dinner dates, and held hands. Just holding hands and cuddling. It was never that far into it to kiss but you knew the day would come.
"Hey Y/n you need to stop zoning out. I was just talking to you." He chuckled and leaned back putting the book he wrote most of his ideas in. He had been assisting a smart inventor and learning more. So he wrote notes in the book. You rubbed the back of your neck and laughed.
"I'm sorry but you're booooorrrring." He laughed and stood up from the seat and walked to the bed. He sat down and leaned in, you blushed before laughing. Not of embarrassment, when it was involved, but because the male attacked your sides with his hands. You tried to stop Luca from tickling you, probably going to lose all of your breath at this point. Your sides started to hurt as you laughed harder.
"Am I still boring huh!" He laughed and continued to attack your sides. You yelled a few stops through your laughter and he stopped by the third one to let you breathe. "I sure don't seem boring now?" A smirk plastered on his face. You glared at him and hit his shoulder.
"Oh shut up." You mumbled and crossed your arms to hide your sides from him. He sighed and pulled you in a hug before laying on you. "Come on I didn't hurt you. Don't be mad." He laughed and held you tighter. "I love yooooou." He mumbled as you squirmed.
"Luca you are suffocating meeeee." You hit his chest lightly and got a response oh him rolling you and him on your side. He put his head on your shoulder. You laughed and moved your hands to go through his hair which wasn't in his little pony tail.
"But I should start heading home, it's getting dark." He only holds you tighter.
"You can say here, I'll sleep on the couch. I wanna cuddle you longer." He mumbled and sat up. You blushed and sighed. "As long as I get the bed." You said with a smile and sat up with him, before you got tackled into another hug. "Thank you!" Luca put his face back into your shoulder. "Wait don't you have that creator thing tomorrow, I'll have to leave early." You sighed and smiled, you weren't a fan of walking early in the morning. He snuggled into your neck further.
"You can always go with me, like a little date." He said against the shirt you were wearing. Rubbed his back and nodded. "I guess i can." You said and leaned your head onto his. He hummed and and wrapped his arms further around your waist.he smiled and sat back up. "Can I continue to explain how smart I am with my notes?" He looked at your figure and titled his head.
"But it's boooring." You complained and looked away from him. He sighed and poke your stomach. You grabbed his wrist as he looked at you with a small smirk. "Are you sure it's boring? I mean I could just." He used his other hand to poke your side. You grabbed his other wrist and looked at him. "Fine tell me how smart you are."
After 30 minutes or so he finished and you were already passed out on his bed. He smiled and ran his hand through your hair before blowing out some of the candles and walking to the door. "Good night." He said and closed the door, heading straight for the couch. He laid down and closed his eyes. It might take a while for him to go to sleep but he will at some point.
That morning, the morning of the third worst day of your life. You had one of the best and worst things happen.
You woke up and walked out of the room and it looked like it was noon, that he was going to take you to the place. You sat up and walked out of the room. You ;poked around before you locked eyes with the male you loved. He smiled and you walked to him. He was checking out his outfit to make sure it looked good. You sighed you weren't like him, he was successful and had money. You on the other hand didn't have much. Sometimes someone questions if you're just with him for the money, you know a lot of girls marry just for money. You met him differently.
A garden without many flowers blooming because it was close to the end of winter. You were interested in the pansies. Of course you didnt know the name at the time but it was beautiful. You sat on the grass with a white dress that was sure to get stained by the grass. It was slim to your body due to you never being able to get a hoop skirt. You sighed before hearing a voice.
"Oh pansies, they are about to die out." The male mumbled and walked to the flowers. He looked at you and smiled. The brown eyes caught your mind. You smiled and looked away from the brunette. He sat next to you the morning dew getting soaked up by his clothes. He looked at it and touched one of the petals on the flower. "They only grow in cold places."
You looked back at the flower. "I didn't know it was just very pretty." You laughed and looked at his hand. Huh, no ring? At this point he was handsome enough to have a wife, and he seemed smart. "My name is Y/n L/n." You smiled and awkwardly looked away.
"Oh! Luca, Luca Balsa. It's nice to meet you." He smiled and took his hand away from the flower. You looked at him and tilted your head. "So what are you doing here? You don't look like you belong on this side of the town." You looked at his clothing, he looked well dressed and the outfit looked pretty pricey. He laughed and stood up. "I'm new to this town. I only came to study under an inventor. I didn't know I shouldn't be on this side of town I was just exploring." He stood up and wiped his wet pants. You also stood up and took the stuff you bought for your family.
"I should get going, have a good day luca." You smiled and started to walk to your home. "I hope i see you again." You said as you got out of his eyesight.
A sigh left your body and you opened your eyes to see luca right in your face. "Sooo what were you thinking about?" You jumped and he stopped you from bumping into any walls. "Oh the day we met." You smiled and held his hand in your hand as you smiled.
"That was one of the best days of my life, the first being when you said yes to me asking to date you." He said before crouching down a little bit and wrapping his arms around your waist, he picked you up and lifted you. "HEY!" You held his shoulders and wrapped your legs around him so you won't fall. He smiled and looked up at you.
You looked down and sighed. His face turned to a concerned one. "What's wrong?" You looked at him and gave a small smile. "Are you sure you want to go with me? I don't even have a dress or a hoop skirt. I don't even know how to wear one." You mumbled and looked at the brunette. He put you down and left the room.
"Oh god what did I do?" You panicked and left the room to see him coming back with clothes. You looked at him confused until he smiled and handed the clothes to you. "You put on the hoop skirt first with the tie in the back then the dress, I can help you with the corset." He smiled and pushed you into the room and closed the door. You looked at the outfit, it seemed to match with what he was just wearing. You laughed and started to undress and get into the clothes he gave you. You tied the hoop skirt and something hit you. He planned this all... You laughed softly and put on the dress. You looked at the mirror and it fit nice and the waist looked form fitting. You sighed and looked at the corset.
"God this is going to be hell." You looked outside the room before tapping Luca's shoulder. He was waiting for you, you mentally snickered. "I think I'll need help with the corset." He smirked and nodded. "Sure you do, just finding more ways to get affection I see." He shook his head and walked in grabbing the corset. He put it around your waist as you held it in place. He tried to be careful and always asked if you were ok and could breathe. You smiled and looked at the outfits. "You planned this yesterday didnt you?" He laughed and nodded' "of course I did."
Leaving the house was easy; he had someone take you and him together. You tapped your hand on your dress as you awkwardly sat. He snaked his fingers in between yours. You looked at him and he had a smile as he looked if you guys were close. Once there he got out and helped you out. You walked beside him and then the whole hell began.
You walked off from where Luca was and explored the whole place until you heard a deathly sound, you looked around for where it came from. Someone also heard but knew where it came from. The police of the town came and you followed out of curiosity. You only saw someone screaming at Lucas the police got involved in the fight and you walked closer.
"You murderer! You are a monster!" The police held back the women as luca looked confused at the screaming. The wife of the inventor that luca as working with was screaming at him, calling him a murderer. You walked closer and looked at Luca standing next to the wife as the police held her.
You looked concerned. "What happened..." You asked not wanting to believe the women. "He killed my husband! He's a MURDERER!" You looked at him and stepped back. "You didn't kill him right?" His heart shattered as he watched you step back in fear.
"I didn't! I promise you! I didn't ! It was a mistake!" He yelled and held his chest. The wife quickly fired back up. "THEN WHY IS MY HUSBAND DEAD." She was in tears and you looked down and took another step back. Luca quickly went up to you and tried to grab your hands. He was stopped by the wife yelling and the officer standing next to you. He almost broke down, as he panicked and started to pull at his hair.
"I didn't! I couldn't kill someone! I promise! I promise! I PROMISE YOU I CAN'T!" He didn't yell at them to prove he wasn't guilty. He was looking straight at you. You looked back up at him and tears streamed down your face. They hurt they were so hot and your lungs slowly felt like they were caving in. The corset stopped your breath and words from coming out. You only let out a small wheeze as everything started to hurt. Your legs hurt, they felt like they were about to break. You tried to take another step but tripped on the dress and fell back, Luca tried to catch you but the officer pulled him back by the collar of his shirt.
You fell. You were used to falling and hitting the hard ground. Luca alway caught you. But he'll never be there. You scooted away and tried pushing off the corset coughing. "Y/n! I'm so sorry I'm sorry! Luca fell on his knees the sound of the wife screaming and the officer trying to calm her out zoned you out. You didn't see him anymore. You just want it to be over. Like it never happened you shouldn't have left. You should have never left him. Maybe you should have... what if he did kill him, he admired his mentor. But if he killed him maybe he would have killed you. You coughed and held your throat. You looked at him as he was getting pulled back up by the collar of his shirt. One of the officers crouched down next to you and started to take off the corset.
"Are they ok! please tell me they are ok! Please?" Luca soon started to cry and started to properly stand looking at you. He coughed and the tears hurt you. Why did it hurt you. You still love him even if he killed someone. He's still Luca, right? You stood up after the corset was gone and walked a few steps looking at him. "Luca i'll miss you, and i b-believe you." Your voice trembled and one of the officer held your back to make sure you didn't fall again.
"ARE YOU CRAZY HE'S A MURDERER HE JUST WANTS YOU IN HIS TRAPPED." The wife pulled you away and held you like you were her child. You tried to push away but the pain you felt made you want to be held, but not by her. You looked back at Luca; he wasn't in his place anymore, he was taken down the hall, he looked at you and frowned. He didn't struggle; he let them take him away. If he struggled they would definitely think he was guilty. A part of you wanted to see him struggle, to struggle to try and get to you. You felt the arms of the wife around you. You hated it. You hate her, you pushed her away and left the heels and ran into the direction they took him. The first love of your life, you looked around. He was,,, long gone.
You stood in the back, this was the day, the second worst day. You don't remember what he sounded like, how long, 2 or 3 months. Waiting for his trail. You walked in, you were assigned his lover. His lover, are you still his lover? You haven't made him laugh, you don't hold him anymore. He doesn't make you want to live anymore. You missed him but you accepted he was never going to make it out, they had no evidence he wasn't guilty. That innocent until proven guilty doesn't work. The wife won't drop the trails.
As you stood in the back you held your breath and put your tongue to the roof of your mouth. Does that trick even work? It probably won't last long at this rate. You sat down and looked around before seeing someone in a white an black suit. You weren't going to be called up to stand at the chance of bias, but so would the wife. She'd have to sit back and shut her mouth. What did she even sound like when she's screaming. You sighed and looked back up at the man who was forced into the room, was that him? He looks so much different, it has been months from the last time you saw him. They wouldn't let you see him, and most of the time you were too scared to go.
Were you scared he killed someone, or the fact that you knew he wasn't coming back into your arms. He wouldn't kill,,, that's what everyone says about killers. But he really wouldn't. Stop doubting him! Stop questioning him from afar. You were staring and sighed and gripped your clothing. A black dress, formal. Not something you like, formals didn't suit you. He was looking around, for you? Did he not see you? Remember what you looked like..? It's been months,,, did he really forget your face?
The trail. It ended. Death isn't the word you want to hear at the end of a trial. The word that follows behind it is worst, the death penalty. By hanging. That was common depending on the crime you get different deaths.
Two weeks, two weeks of trying to see him. Before his... you coughed and hid in your hands, the prison. He still has a month or two. You're been trying for two weeks, you didn't want to lie, but you might have too.you kept on going until today. A day before his death. You'll have to force it to be with him.
You walked into the room, "I'm here to see luca balsa." They looked at you and sighed. "What would your husband think if he knew you were visiting a murderer?" You gripped your fist and had your nails going into your palm. Now or never.
"He is my husband." He wasn't, he would never be. He won't be your husband. He won't live.the officer behind the "glass" and stood up. "Sorry ma'am." He walked to the door and opened it. He brought you to the cell. The man knocked on the wall hard waking up the brunette. You looked surprised and walked into his view. "Your wife is here, get up." His voice had no empathy in it.
Luca stood up and held his head. Walking to the door of the cell. "Ma'am go to that room." He pointed at a door before opening the door of the cell pulling Luca straight out. You sat in the room as you waited. They patted you down before letting you sit down. Once he got into the room you looked around and looked at you.
"Y/n?" He knew you lied, he knew you were a liar to see him. He walked to you as you looked down. You hear his knees hit the ground as he looked at you. "Please tell me that's you?" You looked up as your heart broke. He was about to cry. Tears in the corners of his eyes and his brows furrowed.
"Luca,, I'm sorry." You mumbled and looked down again. His breath stopped as a choked sobbed came from his mouth. You couldn't look up, you can't look at him. It hurts. You zoned out before you felt arms around you, and his tears going through your shirt. He pulled you closer.
"I love you. I love you so much, I never told you that. You are my world, I love you so much. I didn't do so many things in my life. I thought I had time. I really thought I'd have my whole life with you." He sobbed and put his face against your collar bone. You held him. You finally had him back in your arms. You shushed him and took out the hair tie that was holding on for dear life.
It won't need to hold on for much longer.
"Y/n, you can have my stuff. All of it... So you can remember me." He looked up at you and his face held a smile as his tears still streamed down his face. You held his face and wiped away his. "You shouldn't be crying now Luca." You mumbled as your voice cracked and crumbled. You sigh and look at him. He sat up and moved you into his lap and held the back of your head to his chest. "I just want to hold you right now... and do something I never got to do." His swollen eyes showed his smile. He removed his hand from your head and used it to hold your hand. The other went to your cheek. He leaned in and kissed you. Your first and last kiss with him. You felt more tears fall from your face and some ran down the hand Luca was holding your face with.
It felt like you were in there forever, you wished it was forever. It was only a few seconds. You held his hand tighter and stuffed your face into his white and black prison shirt. He sighed as he felt the tears soak into his shirt. Soon a loud bang was heard and you two looked up as you wiped your face. Luca put his face on your shoulder and let the shirt take the salty tears. The guard looked at you two.
"It's time for you to go." He grumbled and you stood up still holding Lucas hand. He was a bit hesitant about getting up knowing this will be the last time he'd hold you. Once he stood up and held you slightly swaying to comfort you even a tiny bit. He leaned down and kissed your cheek. He let go of you and walked to the guard with his head held down looking at the crummy ground you both sat on.
Your body trembled before looking up and saying, "I love you luca." You smiled. Smiled for him. He looked at you and replied with a soft 'I love you too.' You tried to stabilize your breathing and walked to the door after he left. You opened the door and an officer took you out of the prison. You walked to your home as you already had all of Luca's stuff moved to your house. You walked in and went to your room. Your mother was sick and your father felt bad so he was paying for the house. God you miss him, you miss his touch. You held your breath and laid on the bed. You wrapped yourself in his blanket. It still had his smell lingering in it.
Tears got soaked into the blanket, you got most of the stuff from his house set up. You needed something to do in those many months. You sighed as most of the objects in the house now remind you of him. You coughed and held your throat. God it hurts so much. Crying, it ripped up your throat. You don't remember talking to anyone except Luca and the prison guards. You haven't gone out of the house that much. You laid there still in the clothes you put on that morning. Still holding the blanket. After an hour, or was it thirty minutes? You don't know it felt like a long time. It was dark too. You wanted time to stop, you wanted the world to fix itself and make everything better.
Make everything better..
Today is the day. The worst day of your life. You didn't sleep. You physically couldn't, the idea of him. Him dying kept you up, maybe you didn't want to sleep out of fear the world would get worse by the time you opened your eyes. You stood up and walked to a basket on a small table. Your mother made you a black dress, formal black dress. It's only fitting the day. When someone thinks of attending their lover's funeral, after they die. They'd imagine themselves being sixty, old, grey hair, and a hurting back. Like they lived their whole life out. But you know that you'll never have that happy ending.
As you walked out of the house your feet dragged, the feeling of lifting them made them numb to walk on. The sharp air went through your nose as you walked, reminding you of the season. The end of winter, around the time you met him. You stopped and remembered the path to the garden. It was beautiful even in the winter. It was behind an abandoned building, someone was keeping it well kept though.
You looked away and walked to the hell hole. A noose was hung up outside the prison. You stood in front of it, no one was there yet. Maybe you can see him one last time..? You asked yourself before hearing a pair of footsteps. The wife looked at you and smiled. Her smile was ugly. "Ma'am are you ok, you here to watch the murderer killed?" You looked away and didn't reply.
You sighed. All you could do was wait, you can't hold him and tell him he's fine. He was not going to be fine, he's dead by today. You watched him and almost fell. He loves you. You saw it in him. He loved you so much, and you loved him. But just yesterday he just said he loved you, he kissed you. You loved him and wish he could just be there with you. You coughed because of the cold air. He looked at you as he walked onto the raised area. It was made of splintering wood. He looked at you.
He was terrified. You can see it but he was smiling for you. Why is he hiding it, god he doesn't have to smile it hurts. It's going to hurt you more, he looked at you. "I love you Y/n. I love you so much." His voice shook. "I wish I could have married you, I wish I was able to hold you until I died old and happy. I wish I could kiss you more then once. I love you." He said as they put the noose around his neck. You looked at him.
"I love you! I love you so much!" He said once again this time his voice cracked and he leaned forward against the rope around his neck holding him back. "I love you... I wish I could have married you. Hell even have children...." He cried as he thought of all the things he'd miss. You'd get married with a different man, have children with a different man. He'd be gone, gone from your life. Gone. He coughed and looked at you. You shook and held yourself.
"I love you too! I wish i could be with you!" You fell on your knees and heard something drop. It dropped from under him. You looked up slightly to see two feet hanging, and you quickly covered your eyes and cried. You didn't want to be here anymore. You stood up and looked anywhere but the raised wooden stage, a stage that was for the entertainment of the wife. The stage of your worst fear. Is it true? Is he dead? God no someone anyone, stop this hell! You walked backwards before running to the garden. The one heaven you had in this whole place. You sat on the grass and held your stomach. You can't breathe, it hurts the tears feel like they are officially cutting through your cheeks. You looked up as dark clouds came in.
You wished you could laid down and decay. Maybe you can see him away.
Maybe you could see him again..
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