42.0
THE FOURSOME
“Ta-Daá!” Liam exclaims joyfully.
“No!” is all I’m able to say before I slam the door closed right in front of their faces.
“What the hell, Harry?!” Zayn yells.
“Um,” I stutter as I start to feel my whole body starting to shake.
“Open the damn door! Are you kidding?” Liam sounds serious.
I’m trying to find a good excuse but nothing comes to my mind. Well, something does come to my mind but I wish it didn’t.
“I’m not Harry,” I say before slapping my own face with my right hand. Stupid, Harold.
“Nice try, just open the door,” Zayn answers, “Right now.”
“Come on, mate,” Liam knocks insistently, “We are really tired.”
Okay, a very good idea finally comes to my mind. I’ll just open the door and I’ll leave with them. I’ll tell them we should go out for lunch or something and, since they are kind of dumb, they’ll agree without asking any questions.
“Hey,” I wave at them when I finally face them.
“What the hell are you on?” Liam walks inside without asking for permission. How rude.
“Mate!” Zayn hugs me, “Are you hungover or something?”
“He is never hungover, Z,” the other one replies, “He’d be hungover if he didn’t have alcohol, you know.”
“True that,” Zayn stares at me, “Why aren’t you happy to have us here?”
“We are in fucking Brazil!” Liam gets annoying, “Come on and hug the hell out of me!”
“What are you doing here?” his stupid excitement transfers. It is kind of awesome to have my best buddies here but… maybe not right now. Not when there’s a naked male just a few steps away from us.
“Well,” Liam sighs, “Will you explain or I’ll do it?”
“I think I should do it.”
“Go ahead then, Z.”
“Someone just please explain,” I cut them off and I can’t stop checking on the bathroom door.
“Okay, so I got this call from an Art gallery in Brasilia,” he seems really excited, “They want to sell my work here so I have this meeting in a few days.”
“Isn’t that awesome?” Liam expects me to say something but all I’m focused on is the freaking trailer I watched a few minutes ago. If I thought Bum’s bum was marvelous before, I was wrong. Because it is a freaking masterpiece!
“So we decided to come earlier just to surprise you,” he says, giving me a moment to react but still no reaction from me.
“We shouldn’t lie to him, Z,” Liam shakes his head, “The flights were unbelievably expensive because of the World Cup and the only reasonable price we were able to find was this one that came to Sao Paulo.”
“How did you find me here?” I ask, trying to pretend I’m excited.
“We had your whole schedule, remember? We planned this thing together,” Zayn sits on the bed, “We were afraid we would miss you but you are right here. Isn’t this awesome?”
“It is,” a smile creeps on my face, “Congrats on the art gallery thing by the way. That’s huge.”
“I know, I couldn’t be more excited about it,” I see how he is starting to inspect the room. Liam is dumber than Zayn, he wouldn’t suspect anything but the other bitch is so damn into details that it’s starting to scare me.
“We should go out to celebrate,” I clap, “Let’s go right now! I push them to the door.”
“What? No! We just got out from a very long flight. We need a nap,” Liam throws himself on the bed.
“No, but-”
“But nothing,” Zayn interrupts me, “And aren’t you supposed to be leaving in like,” he checks his clock, “Ten minutes?”
“No, the thing is,” I drag the words to earn more time. I need a damn excuse!
“Wait,” Zayn is still inspecting the room, “Is that a breakfast tray?”
“No, it isn’t,” I retort, “Let’s go out! Come on! Move!”
“Breakfast for two?” he raises an eyebrow to me and I hate how accusing he looks right now.
“Harold,” Liam shakes his head, “Are you sharing breakfast with a girl now?”
“Are you?” Zayn gives me a surprised look, “Looks like Brazil has changed you a lot.”
“Shut up, both of you,” I snap, “I’m not sharing breakfast with anyone. I was just too hungry.”
“Do you actually think you can lie to our faces and get away with it?” Liam pushes me, “Never in a million years, Harold.”
“Stop calling me Harold, you know I hate it!”
“Where is she then?” he gets stubborn.
“Yeah, we want to meet this miracle maker girl,” Zayn crosses his arm, expecting me to give them an answer.
“Nowhere, she already left,” my hands are so sweaty right now. I feel like I’m going to suffocate.
“Did she?” he insists and I nod in response while my eyes travel back and forth from their accusing faces to the bathroom door.
“Why do you keep on staring at the bathroom door so much?” Zayn walks to the bath, “I hear water running inside.”
“She is in there,” Liam raises his voice, “Sorry,” he lowers it again, “She is in there, isn’t she?”
“Yes, she is,” the greatest idea comes to my mind, “But she is really shy so you guys should just leave now. Come on; let’s go to the lobby or something. I need time to explain it to her before she meets you.”
“Boring,” Liam stands up. Wait. Did this just work?
“Okay, we’ll wait outside but can you hurry her up or something? I really need a nap,” Zayn reluctantly walks to the exit door.
“But I need to check out from the hotel, guys. I’m leaving to the airport in no time,” I say as I hug them to make their exit happen as fast as possible.
“Aren’t you going to wear a shirt?”
“Nah, this is Brazil, nobody wear shirts in this country,” I lie.
“Is that true?” Liam sounds excited, “I guess I’ll lose my shirt too.”
“You don’t wanna do that yet,” Zayn stops him and the other gives him a frown in response, “You are white like cheese right now. Just wait for the sun to get you before you show them the good stuff.”
“You are absolutely right,” Liam shakes the disappointment away.
“I missed you, guys,” I’m finally able to be happy about them being here.
“We missed you too,” Liam smiles when we are just two steps away from the door.
“Are you ready for round 2?” the fucking tourist ruins everything as he exits the bathroom, wearing nothing but a tiny stupid towel wrapped around his small hip. “Oh,” his expression changes completely when he sees my friends there.
“Shit!” I yell and, even if I hate him right now, I can’t help but notice how hot he looks when he is wet. Damn you, Mother Nature for creating this guy.
“Oh, hello there,” Zayn nods as he inspects my tourist’s body. The Arab needs to calm down or I’ll punch his face.
“Excuse me?” Liam gives Zayn a warning look, “What did you just say?”
Right! I forgot they were gayer than gayness and… a couple. Incest alert! Guess Liam’s the jealous type of gay.
“Oh, no, nothing. I was just,” Zayn plays clueless, “Who is this?”
The three of them turn to me and the anxiety for having to give them an answer is killing me.
“I have no idea!” I yell out of nowhere, “I think we are about to get robbed, let’s run!” Sometimes I get the feeling I’m not as smart as I think I am.
“He is not a thief,” Zayn goes back to staring at the tourist, “Who are you?”
“Oh my God,” Liam starts to giggle, “Round 2, huh?” he gives me a teasing look.
“What are you laughing about? Shut up,” I punch his arm.
“Hey! What was that about?”
“I don’t know,” I shrug.
“So…” Zayn looks so suspicious, “Is any of you two going to explain anything?”
“Hi, I’m Louis,” he waves his hand, struggling not to lose the towel.
“Can you just go get dressed already?” I roll my eyes at him. Both Liam and Zayn are eating him with their eyes and I can’t take it anymore. These bitches need to go down.
“Okay,” the tourist walks to the bed, “I just need to grab my clothes.”
“Harry?” a smirk that I hate is starting to show on Zayn’s face.
“What?” I snap.
“What is this? Explain!” he asks once Louis leaves the room to go to the bathroom again.
“I told you,” Liam looks at Zayn while he shakes his arms in the air, “I fucking told you so I win!”
“Shut up,” he cuts him off, “Let Harry explain.”
“We were…” I stutter, “We were having a threesome!” I was wrong before; I’m as smart as a human being can possibly be.
“A threesome?” they ask in unison.
“Yup,” I act more relaxed now, “God, this is so awkward. I wanted him to leave already but he begged to take a shower first and I just couldn’t say no. Don’t do it, just in case you are wondering how it was, it is weird to have a naked guy in front of you. I’ll never in my life do that again.”
“Do you actually know what a threesome means?”
“What? Of course I do,” I laugh nervously.
“And where’s the third person? I only see two,” Liam counts with his fingers when Louis comes back from the bathroom.
“She went to get water from the spending machine down the whole,” I answer quickly, “Didn’t you hear me saying her name when you knocked? I thought it was her.”
“He did mention a girl’s name,” Zayn seems to be buying my big load of bullshit. Score!
“What is happening?” the tourist walks to them, “Liam,” he shakes my friend’s hand, “Zayn.” I can tell he looks super happy about finally getting the chance to meet them but this can’t be happening. I need to stop it.
“Wait, do we know each other?” Zayn asks.
“You kind of look familiar now that I watch you from close.”
“Yeah, we actually-”
“No!” I interrupt, yelling as loud as I can.
“What’s wrong with you?” Zayn scolds me.
“Nothing,” I take a deep breath, “You don’t know each other, how would you know each other?” I give the tourist a warning look. They can’t remember Louis from their flat otherwise they’ll know he is gay because I guess gay people only hang out with other gay people. I’m not so sure but I’m pretty sure that’s how it works.
“Oh,” it takes him a while but he gets the hint, “Yeah, I don’t think we know each other.”
“But you said our names,” Zayn gives him a suspicious look. Step back, Sherlock Holmes.
“He just overheard,” I say without thinking, “I mean, that must be it, right?”
“Yeah, I heard Harry mentioning your names from the bathroom,” he smiles awkwardly. We are a good lying team. I like this.
“This is amusing,” Liam laughs, “All this just to hide the fact that you banged him?”
“What the hell?” I try to look as disgusted as possible, “That’s so disrespectful.”
“Come on, just admit it,” he insists, “You two were banging.”
“I wouldn’t bang this dude for anything in the world,” I say, “Wait, I wouldn’t bang any other dude either because,” I raise my voice, “I’m not gay.”
I hear the tourist sighing when I finish my sentence. Is it just me or he looks kind of sad? Whatever, I’m not going to let him make me feel guilty about this. He needs to respect my decisions. I’m not ready to come out to my friends yet. Period.
“Um,” Zayn keeps on staring at me in a way that makes me feel worried, “The girl is taking too long to come back, isn’t she?”
“Yeah and why didn’t you guys just take the water from here?” Liam smirks as he grabs a bottle from the mini fridge. Shit!
“Harry, just,” Bum tries to talk but I shush him.
“I bet she went to,” I try to add another lie but then the best thing in the world happens.
“Why is the door open?” the most beautiful and lovely model walks in.
“There she is!” I celebrate as I run to hug her.
“Wow,” she gives me a confused look, “Someone’s excited to see me.”
“So it was true,” Zayn looks at Liam, “I win.”
“I can’t believe this,” he mumbles, “Bummer.”
“Oh,” the model turns to them, “Who are you? Hello!”
“They are my friends,” I try to introduce them but destiny fucks everything up again.
“Babe?” the stupid ginger walks in. Damn you, destiny, just leave me alone already, would you?!
“Who is this?!” Liam stands up, looking very excited, “Why did he call you babe?” he gives them an accusing look and then turns to Zayn, “I guess I win.”
“Um, what is happening?” the model frowns, “This is Ed, my-”
“Your nothing!” I cut her off, “Well, this is super awkward. I didn’t want to tell you because it makes her look pretty bad but we were actually having a…” I sigh, “Foursome.”
“A foursome?” Liam frowns.
“What?” Ed laughs really loud. What a dumb redhead he is.
“What in the world?” Cara looks super confused before she finally gets it, “Oh,” she coughs, “Yeah, busted! I’m a slut.”
“I just can’t believe this,” the tourist stands up, “This is too much for me, I’m out of here.”
“No, wait,” I try to stop him but Zayn’s and Liam’s eyes are on me so I stay quiet.
“Goodbye, Liam. Goodbye, Zayn,” he says as he walks to the door without even turning around to look at me. He looks so sad and small right now. I’m starting to feel something weird inside.
“Wait! Liam and Zayn?” the model sounds very surprised.
“That’d be us,” Zayn smiles.
“Aw,” she looks at me, “Your best friends! The gay ones, right?”
Shit! The idiotic model needs to learn when to shut up.
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