I don't know what to do.....
I feel so depress.....
My body is slowly giving up....
How do I let go without letting go....
Have you ever felt so unwanted.....
Well I feel unwanted everyday.....
I dont have any friends because I distance myself from everyone.....
I don't think i can handle friendship right now....
I want so much things for myself but I'm not pushing myself at all...
I'm not doing anything I'm watching my teenage time goes away and I don't know what to do....
I have noone I can talk to....
Theres nothing I can do...
Noone understands me.....
I feel so lost in this world.....
I feel out of place like I dont belong...
My mother is just here laughing and talking, enjoying her life...
Whiles I'm still here undecided on what I'm gonna do I feel disgusted with myself.....
I'm not making time for myself or school...
I'm just doing nothing with my life....
Wanting the easy way out and it's not gonna happen.....
I know for a fact when I turn 18 I'm leaving......
Being at this house I feel like I'm going crazy.....
Being away from here gives me peace.....
At night I can't sleep because I'm thinking too hard.....
I cant even answer simple personal questions without anxiety starting to kick in...
Everytime I try talk to my mom she sucks her teeth or make some excuses....
So as I lay in my bed at night thinking is this how I'm gonna be forever stuck here....
Sometimes I wish I wasn't even brought to this earth it's not like I'm going to affect anybody by leaving....
Noone checks up on me I have to be the one....
People only talk to me when its beneficial......
And as I go sleep for school Tommorow, wake up pretending and laughing like everything is okay and repeat samething every night...
I've had enough.....