He shrugs, "I don't care."
My jaw hits the floor. "What do you mean you don't care?"
"If I'm being honest, I knew before you just told me." Maddox admits, casually taking another bite of his burger. I try to find the right words to say, but I can't. He knew? But how?
"Why did you never say anything?" I sputter. My hands are shaking as I set my half of the sandwich down.
Maddox leans back in his chair, "Did you want me to say something about it?" He doesn't at all seem bothered by this. Calling Dean after my fight with Noah was the end of the world compared to this.
I am absolutely floored. "I'm guess I'm just confused."
"When I first found out, I was suspicious. It was the night you met Hayes and Sephine. Someone approached me while you were chatting with Tessa and Seph, warning me of what you had done to them. I spent the rest of the night trying to figure out how good of an actress you are."
"It's never been an act with you." The words blurt immediately causing Maddox to smile.
"I'm glad to hear that. A lot of moments made sense after I found out. The reason I couldn't find your name on the guest list was because you were never supposed to be there. I got the sense that you were trying to turn your life around, and I'd be crazy to judge you when I've never walked in your footsteps."
I reach across the table and rest my hand on Maddox's. "I never wanted any of your money, I promise. I was afraid that once I told you who I was, you would want nothing to do with me."
"Cass, it's okay. If I were in your shoes, I don't know what I would have done either. I called the person back and asked them not to involve the police. Whatever you took from them, I'm sure they are much happier with what I gave them." Maddox's smile is sincere. "I'm just glad you finally felt like you could tell me."
"Why are you so willing to see the good in me? I'm not Paige." I ask, trying to understand this. His reaction makes no sense.
"Because I'm too selfish to walk away from you. You're a good person, and I can see that." His cheeks start to pink, along with the tops of his ears, "It's been a long time since I've let someone in. I know you're not Paige, and I'm not trying to pretend that you are. She had her faults too. I don't want you to feel like I'm comparing you to her."
I pull my hand back to my lap, "I'm afraid that I won't be enough for you." And then there's the words I leave unspoken: I'm afraid there isn't enough room left in his heart for me because he still loves Paige. I can't compete with the memory of a dead girl.
He's taken aback, "If I haven't proven to you by now that I'm serious about wanting something with you, then I'm sorry. Yes, I was ready to spend the rest of my life with Paige. It was all planned out. Did I feel lost when she disappeared? Absolutely." Maddox's blue eyes are unwavering. He's telling the truth. "But she wouldn't have wanted me to put my life on hold for her. That's not who Paige was. Letting you see the parts of me that have been scarred by her is terrifying, but you need to see them to understand who I am. I don't want to make any promises I can't keep, but I have a hard time imagining my life without you in it."
I nod slowly because he's right. There is no point in comparing myself to her because I can't compare Noah and Maddox. We might have been together for years, but he was never there for me the way Maddox is right now. Everything was an argument. Everything was about money. Everything was a scam. The only argument Maddox and I have had was after I called Dean when Noah hit me. I don't think that it even counts as an argument.
"Thanks Maddox," I smile appreciatively, "You're right. I can't compare us because we're different people. I just really appreciate you giving me a chance." It's more than I deserve. "I'm going to pay you back every penny."
He shakes his head quickly, "Cass, I don't need it. You don't have to do that."
"No, I do need to do it."
Maddox looks proud, "Give it to a shelter or charity. I won't take a penny from you."
I turn away, finding it funny that this random sandwich shop in Boston is where we are having this conversation. "Fine. I'll give it to a charity." I can't hold back the smile that's threatening to break my face in half. If I knew how exhilaratingly free it would be to tell the truth, regardless of if he already knew or not, I would have done it weeks ago. Now that Maddox knows, I feel like I can really put my past behind me. My past doesn't define me anymore than Maddox's defines him.
It feels good to walk with him on the sidewalk, and not have this loom over my head. Maddox proved everything Noah tried to tell me when it came to me and Maddox wrong. He had no idea what he was talking about.
Maddox isn't the kind of person that you can even begin to try and fit to a stereotype because he's completely different than one would expect. Dean is the same way.
Maybe Noah and me were the ones that had everything backwards. Just because these people have money, doesn't automatically make them a terrible person. Hell, Maddox is a better person than I'll ever be.
At the thought of Dean, I remember the last conversation we had. The words 'you're a good person' echo inside me. I threw a fit over four little words. I'm the one in the wrong here.
"Everything okay? You're awfully quiet," Maddox teases, and I shrug.
"Dean and I kinda got into it the other day. It was my fault because I overreacted."
He's quietly mulling over what I just said. "What about?"
I slip my arm through his, holding on to him to remind myself that he said he wasn't going anywhere. "Something I need to apologize for. But if I'm being honest, I really don't want to think about your brother."
"Half-brother," Maddox corrects quickly. I roll my eyes, but I don't press the topic of Dean.
"So what else do you have to show me in this town?" I ask, and he smiles widely.
"I thought you'd never ask."
*********
Maddox showed me every thing. By the time we got back to the house, my legs felt like jelly from all the walking we did. It wasn't even late, but I felt so tired that I was ready to take a nap.
It was exactly what I needed too. By the time I woke up, dinner was almost ready.
"Maddy, she's a nice girl. I just don't know if she's the right person for you." Charlie's voice filters through, and I freeze in my steps.
"You've spent what? A few hours with her, and you think you're qualified to make that decision?" Maddox's tone is surprisingly harsh. "I'm doing what you and Brett told me to do. I'm moving on."
I feel like I'm going to be sick. I shouldn't be listening to this, but I can't bring myself to enter the room.
"And you should be. Cassidy seems great, but..." Charlie trails off and Maddox picks up right where she left off.
"You think I'm trying to pretend that she's Paige?"
The silence is her hesitation, "I don't know what to think. You can't blame me for being worried though. Maddox, you haven't been with anyone since my sister died."
"She's gone now, and she isn't coming back." There is a long pause before Maddox scoffs, "Charlotte, you know I love you. But this isn't your choice."
"I'm not saying it is. Please don't take this the wrong way. You're not in the right place to be in a relationship. A few months ago you were completely prepared to move here! Then she shows up, and you stay for her."
"You told me to stay in New York and to take the job with Hayes. I didn't stay for Cassidy. How exactly am I supposed to not take that the wrong way?"
Charlie sighs loudly, "Because I'm trying to keep you from ending up with the wrong person."
"My God Charlotte, you haven't even given me a good reason as to why you believe I shouldn't be with her. Enough of trying to say that I'm pretending she's Paige. What is this really about?"
"Stop calling me Charlotte. If you really want to know, this is about you moving forward as if my sister never existed. How do you know that Cassidy isn't with you for your money? She comes from nothing, and you have everything." That blow hurts a little, but I don't blame her for thinking that.
"Are you fucking kidding me?"
"Charlie that was too far," Nick interjects joining the conversation. "Can you guys please just stop arguing? You're going to wake up Owen and Cassidy if you haven't already."
Maddox ignores him. "You're damn right it was too far. Nothing I do is the right fucking thing! I was alone, holding onto the hope that Paige might still come home. Even after we had something to bury, and you both told me that I need to move on. I finally start to move on with someone I care about, and now you're telling me that she's not the right person for me."
"That's not true-" She tries to defend herself, but Maddox isn't having it. I pull my cardigan around me, and take a backward step to retreat to the room we're supposed to stay in.
"I would give anything for Paige to be alive, but she isn't. She died because you didn't stop her from enlisting in the first place, and I didn't stop her from leaving. Paige was the love of my life, don't even try to act like you know what this is like for me. Nick came home. Paige didn't. You'll never understand."
There is an audible smack that echos before hurried footsteps and a slamming door. There's more talking, but it's too low for me to hear. I've heard more than enough anyway.
As soon as I make it back to the room, I grab the shoes I'd left at the foot of the bed and the clothes I'd worn earlier to stuff in my bag. If I'd known coming here meant starting shit with Maddox's family, then I never would have gotten on the plane. This was supposed to be a drama free weekend, but from telling Maddox the truth about me and the conversation I just heard, it's anything but.
In my haste to grab all my things, I missed the opening and closing of the bedroom door. "What are you doing?" Maddox asks, sounding completely exhausted.
I turn around to face him, noting the small cut on his cheekbone. "I'm going home. I never meant to cause problems between you and Charlie. I'm sorry."
Maddox's face pales, "How much did you hear?"
I turn back to zip my bag, "Enough to know that I'm not welcome here."
"Cass, it's not you. Charlie is just..." He runs both his hands up the side of his head in frustration. He looks exactly like Noah right now. It's a scary thought. "It's an adjustment for everyone."
"I'm sorry I'm not her," I say, looking back to meet his eyes before resuming to finish my packing.