I think being an agent has clouded my perspective of wrong and right. If a conflict arises and there is a clear correct choice, I might pick the other option. Maybe it's because I'm thinking long term,
Is it easier to get out of a stupation if I do this?
Will we be safe if that happens?
Like, if somebody wants to go out to dinner and they ask me to pick a restaurant,
Most would pick their favorite restaurant.
My brain asks which place is furthest from the last triple H spotting and which building has the most exits. If it's in a secluded area, then no. But at the same time if it's always too crowded, not there either.
It's complicated and confusing.
Which I guess proves my point.
The agency fucked up the way my brain should work. I'm not here for it.
Maybe it wasn't the smartest choice Damian and I ever made, but we never told WPP that we saw blue chic and trench coat. But I was thinking ahead. We would get relocated, probably lose touch with the plastics, never see our neighbors again- yeah. It's best to just shut up about some things.
Besides, we haven't seen them since and we've both been going to work on our normal schedules.
Business at the flower shop grew sparse as august became september and september turned to october. The days, while getting shorter, just felt to be growing longer and more boring. As the leaves changed colors I was in my room, painting them more. Shane, who apparently did photography- I had no idea - took photos of the leaves for me to use as reference. The trio next door wanted their own painting of my autumn leaves. Word travels fast around town, and soon I was getting commissions by lots of the town peoples for painting.
I'm 99% sure it's because Damian bragged about having such a talented wife, but...
Aaron jokingly clarified that I would in fact not be leaving the flower shop just to open my own art gallery.
I had told him not yet at least.
But that's where I sat on this October evening, out on my balcony painting the leaves outside. Cady waved at me from her back porch, to which I returned with a smile.
Her hair matched the leaves I was painting,
Life with Cady was actually going quite well. She was down for dates, even if Damian and I were married. She was understanding that "our parents were accepting". Yeah we stuck with that one.
This is gonna be a bitch to sort out when triple H gets caught.
If triple H gets caught .
No.
They will be.
I mix a deeper shade of orange to layer onto the canvas.
It was a nice afternoon, the sunset reflected tons of deep oranges and purples onto the clouds behind the trees. It made me wish every night had a sunset like this.
I could hear the doorbell ring downstairs and Damian go down to get it, so I kept painting. Probably just Shane. Like me and Cady, Damian was slowly going head over heels for the nice-photo-taking-cookie-making-boy next door. I thought it was adorable.
"Janis!" Damian called from downstairs. Speak of the devil .
I sigh and place down my painting pallet.
Agent Jonas is sitting in the living room when I walk in.
"Oh, I'm sorry I forgot you were coming today!" I say, scooping up Van as she runs over to me. Leonardo on the other hand sees me and huffs before walking over to Damian.
His problem .
"Actually, I showed up uninvited, if you don't mind." The agent says. "There are some things we need to talk about."
Damian and I share a look. Did she find out?
"I've noticed this place looks a lot more lived in." The agent continues. "That's a good thing."
I hadn't even noticed, but she was right,
On our walls were photos of us with our neighbors, and one with the plastics. I quickly stood in front of that one so the Agent couldn't see. Damian and I had replaced the original grey and gloomy furniture for more bright colors. My paintings were scattered around the place and we had potted plants everywhere . Apparently starting a new life teaches you some things you didn't know about yourself. Like I have an amazing green thumb.
"Yeah, it is." Damian says. He's looking around like he's never seen the room before.
"I must say, it took you both long enough." The agent says. "But it happened, and that's all that matters. Now, who are these cuties?" She asks addressing the cats, who have their own fair share of photos on the wall.
"This," I say holding Van up a bit. "Is Van Gough. She's a sweetheart."
"And this is Leonardo DiCattrio." Damian grins at his pun. "Who is also a sweetheart unless you're Janis"
"It's not fair." I say walking over to Damian. Leonardo sees me coming and jumps up, hisses for good measure, and stalks away.
"I'm sure they're both amazing." Agent Jonas says, petting Leonardo as he passes.
I sit next to Damian and lean against him. "So, is that all? That's why you're here?" I ask.
"Yes, also I will be visiting less frequently. Since you clearly seem to be doing well, I don't think monthly visits are as necessary."
I feel my heart start beating at a normal pace again. She doesn't know . Thank god .
We chat for a bit more and Damian offers for the agent to stay for dinner. But she denies nicly and leaves. Damian and I ate in a comfortable silence. We both had our own things to process in our own heads. Which was fine. I'm too busy eating anyway.
I'm out the second I hit my pillow.
Maybe it's trauma or something, but once I became Janis Leigh, I started having vivid and realistic dreams. I'm not talking about the dreams where you standing on the ceiling and your pizza guy is a talking human sized cat. No, like shit that can actually happen.
And it feels so real.
I don't remember the dream, but I sat up gasping, the events slipping through my fingers like water. But what stayed was my beating heart and heavy breathing.
I glance around the room wildly, willing my eyes to adjust.
But nothing was there.
Obviously.
I layed back down on my pillow and tried to go back to sleep, but it felt like I was gonna explode with anxiety. Or get sick at least.
I toss over, trying to get comfortable and remember my dream.
I think we had to relocate.
I dunno.
I forgot it.
So why is my body so worked up?
I finally give in and get up. I trudge over to Damians room feeling like a child.
"Damian?"
"Yeah?" He sounds like I just woke him up. I feel bad now.
"I just- uh." I'm an absolute fuckign child who can't take care of herself after a nightmare. "I'm a little- just-"
"Janis?"
"Yeah?" I whisper looking down. If i wasn't so worked up it be comical of how stupid I looked standing in his doorway like a toddler.
"C'mere you." Damian says, and I can hear a laugh in his voice.
"Okay." I say before walking over. I lay next to him and wrap my arm around his middle, my head on his chest.
"Bad dream?" He asks.
"Yeah, its stupid."
"No it's not." Damian says. If anyone else said that, it'd mean nothing. But the way he said it, or maybe just because it's Damian, I could almost feel the pit in my stomach disappear.
"We've been through so much together, a bad dream isn't stupid. This isn't my first nightmare rodeo." He adds.
Oftentimes we would all just crash on the firm sofas instead of going home after a particular jarring job. None of us were unfamiliar with being woken up by somebody else's cries. Karen and I were definitely the worst offender though.
Damian pulls me in a little closer and kisses the top of my head.
"We're okay."