- - : MAIN VILLA : - -
I get all dolled up, having painted my nails and toenails white and pop on my favourite dress. A sunflower chiffon midi dress.
'Either way. If he comes back single, I look bomb. If he brings back a girl imma show him he done fucked it.' The girls all laugh at me.
I was confident in the outside but the opposite on the inside.
We head down to the fire pit.
And my stomach starts doing flips as Laura appears.
Rebecca goes first, and picks Jordan.
Then it's Mike, and he comes back with another girl.
'Number 4.' I mumble to Siannise, both of us laughing.
But it means Jess can couple up with Ched.
Who was really just a bigger, better Mike.
And Mike did look a bit bothered.
Then it's Luke M, who brings back a girl too.
And he seems really into her.
Whereas she just says she's overwhelmed but happy.
Oh.
Wasn't keen on her.
Then Siannise is up, and she's panicking.
But Luke T walks in alone.
And everyone's crying.
It was the cutest thing ever.
But, then it's Nas and Demi.
And even though Demi stays loyal, Nas brings in another girl.
My heart literally broke for her, it was horrific.
'Bad guy. Bad guy.' I shake my head.
Then it's just me and Paige left.
And she's next, meaning I'm last.
She stands up and after a long ass wait, Finn comes back single and I almost cry as they both say they've couch surfed.
Then Laura turns to me.
'Saoirse, please stand up.'
I take a deep breath, standing up as I straighten out my dress with a small smile.
'How are you feeling?' I laugh once. 'I'm really nervous. Preparing for the worst, but really really hoping for the best.' I laugh a little, not wanting to look at any of the boys.
'How've the last few days been for you without Callum?' She asks and I sigh.
'Umm, they've been hard. I definitely need to stop moaning at him so much. But, I think I've just missed having him around.' She smiles at me.
Was that a good sign?
'Did you let yourself get to know any of the other boys?' She then asks and I take a breath. 'They're all really lovely boys, and they'd make great additions to the villa, but my heart was definitely elsewhere.' I finish, seeing Luke M's face drop in my peripheral.
Oh.
'You were coupled up with Callum, before he left for Casa Amor. Do you think he has stayed loyal to you?' I take a deep breath, I probably looked like an idiot.
'Umm, I think the few days before he left we were starting to talk more long term and he was saying that I could trust him. So, maybe. But I know boys, and how they work so, I'm not too sure.' I cringe and she nods.
And I don't see Nas, Finn and the Luke's faces all scrunch up in unison.
'Well, it's decision time. Do you want to stick with Callum? Or re-couple with one of the new boys?'
I bite my lip, answering quickly as my tummy does another roll.
'I'd like to stick with Callum.' I smile.
So, so, naively.
'Okay Saoirse. You have chosen to stay loyal to Callum, but has he stayed loyal to you? If Callum does walk in with one of the girls from Casa Amor, you will be single. But if he returns alone, he's all yours.' I rub my sweaty palms together, closing my eyes briefly.
I felt like I was going to throw up.
Everyone turns to the dressing room doors, and I move my hands to my face.
Then I see him.
And I see a blonde girl holding his hand.
I look away immediately, biting my cheek to try and stop my eyes from watering.
'Shut the fuck up.' I hear Paige. 'Oh my fucking god.' And Siannise, who never swears.
I laugh once, not at Siannise.
But at the fact I was stupid enough to believe that he'd actually be alone.
Then it soon turns to anger. And I suck my teeth, moving my hands back down to my side, trying not to scream.
The two of them head down the steps, until they're right in front of me.
I can't look at anyone, I can't even glance at Callum.
I just wanted to curl up in a ball and scream, cry.
I wanted to be anywhere but here.
Standing looking like a fucking idiot.
'Callum. What made you re-couple with Molly?' I finally turn to look at him, staring straight at him.
The lying little shit.
'Umm I went into Casa Amor. I had the chance to speak to Molly, and it brought out a side to me I didn't think I had. Like, the way I felt about her after two or three days just clarified it. Ummm. Not to say anything against Saoirse, like I wasn't unhappy with her. It's just. It's been a sign for me that something was missing. And I think I found it with Molly.' I frown slightly.
Whatever.
'Saoirse. How do you feel?' Laura laughs once, obviously on my side.
'I'm happy for Callum.' I shrug sassily.
'Should've never trusted a scaffolder anyway.'
I tuck my hair behind my ear. 'Onwards and upwards I suppose.' The tone of my voice changes a little bit to how I actually feel, a lot sadder.
'I know it's not a nice moment. But, is there anything you'd like to say.' I put all my anger into two words.
'Congrats, hun.'
I smile fakely, hearing Paige snort quietly. Then I can't look as Laura talks to Molly, not really paying attention.
Then they take their seat and Laura tells me I'm single, then I can sit down.
'Do you want a cuddle?' Luke T asks from beside me and I nod, biting back the tears now I wasn't stood in front of him.
Luke pulls me into his side and Siannise grabs my hands, rubbing my arm.
'I cannot fucking believe him.' She fumes, shaking her head.
I laugh once, whispering back. 'I look like such a fucking idiot.' I wipe under my eyes with my free hand, catching the tears before they can fall.
I wasn't gonna break down here. Not yet, when the little prick could still see me.
Then Laura leaves with the rest of the not picked new people, and we're free to go from the fire pit.
'Sursh.' Paige and Siannise hug me straight away, and they pull me straight off upstairs.
'I am gobsmacked.' Paige says and I shake my head.
'I'm such a fucking idiot.' The tears start falling as soon as we get up the first flight, heading towards the day beds.
'I cannot believe he's done that. Honestly. What a dick.' Siannise fumes too.
We get to the daybeds and I fully break down.
'I can't. I can't do it. Not again.' I cover my face, one of the girls either side of me.
'You cannot let this affect you at all Sursh. Honestly, if he's done this, there's something wrong with him. He's fucking delusional.' Paige shakes her head.
'But why. It's not just him. This always happens. I always get the shit.' I cry, wiping my eyes carefully.
'I have to put up with it and then they go off and be amazing for someone else. Why can't I just be the girl. Why am I always the one that loses.' I sob, Siannise sighing as she cuddles me more and I vent.
'How am I supposed to stay in here now?' I shake my head, hearing footsteps and turning away from whoever it is.
Until I see it's just the two Luke's.
'Awh, Sursh.' They both come over as I hide my face again, standing up.
'I don't, I just wanna go home.' Paige and Siannise jump straight up. 'No no no.' They rub my arms.
'How, how can I sit there and just watch them.' I start sobbing again, I couldn't control it. 'Saoirse.' I feel arms around me, not Paige's or Siannise's as they're still rubbing my arms.
'I'm so sorry.' It's Luke M, Luke T pulling him away a little so he can join in.
'This is so shit.' Paige shakes her head.
'He's just such a liar. He sat there and told me the other day. He told me he wouldn't do this.' I shake my head, a lump forming in my throat and stopping me speaking.
'Honestly, I don't understand.' Siannise closes her eyes.
'You need to stay though, you need to see this through. We will not let you leave.' Luke M keeps his hand on my arm as they form a sort of protective bubble around me.
'Sursh honestly. I know it feels like this is the end, but you are the fittest, most amazing, stunning, lovely, intelligent person and I will not let you waste this opportunity because some prick, he who shall no more be named.' I laugh slightly at Paige.
'Threw a diamond away. You deserve so much better and you have all of us here. And Finn, wherever the fuck that kid is.' I laugh again.
'There we go. That's what we want to see.' Luke T smiles. 'Okay. Okay. Thankyou so much. I love you all so much.' I pull all 4 of them into a hug.
'Now go, you two, you need a proper reunion. You're too cute.' I push Siannise to Luke T.
'And YOU!' I point to Luke M as Luke T hugs Siannise and they head to the sun loungers.
'Go get Natalia.' I push his shoulder and he grins.
'You sure you're good.' Tears spring to my eyes again. 'Yeah. I've got Paige, I'll keep her two seconds then send her down to Finn when Siannise and Luke are done.' I smile and he nods.
'Okay. You've got this. You're amazing.' He hugs me again and I smell his aftershave. It was gorgeous.
'Thankyou. Now go get your girl.' He nods, heading back downstairs as I shake my head.
'Totally inappropriate timing but that was the cutest fucking thing ever.' Paige stares at me as he disappears and I laugh.
Properly.
'Idiot.' She drags me to the kitchen for a drink, and I grab some chocolate too.
I had no man, I was eating whatever the fuck I wanted.
'Please just, confirm. You're not gonna try win him over.' She double checks as she pours me a triple shot of vodka into my Coca Cola.
'Fuck no. I'm not even wanting to get upset now because I'm sad. I'm just fucking angry. Like. He must've been lying to my face. If there was "something missing" he knew before Casa Amor. And that fucking boy, lied, to my face. I am fuming.' I shake my head, stuffing my face.
Then I see him coming up the stairs.
'If he thinks he is pulling me. That boy has got another thing coming.' I huff, watching with my chocolate and drink as he trips up the stairs.
'Ha ha.'
I shout, Paige falling to the floor laughing and Siannise and Luke also having to hide their laughter.
'Can I have a chat with you please?' I don't even like his accent anymore.
'Why?'
Paige scoffs at me.
'Just wanna talk to you.' 'About what?' I stare back straight away. 'Just wanna have a chat.' I huff.
'Ummm.'
'If you don't want to that's fine, just come back to me when you're ready.'
'No just go in here, but be quick.' I head into the living room, Callum following.
I sit down opposite.
'Obviously. This isn't nice.' I cut him off. 'Let's just make this snappy.' I shake my head, I was too angry.
'You got anything to say?' He asks and I shake my head. 'Nope.'
'Basically. As soon as we went in the villa, I said I'm not even bothered. I don't need to try and find someone.' I frown.
'Thought you said there was something missing with us.' I shrug.
'Well, yeah. But, I.' He goes off on a mumbling tangent, but I wasn't taking any of his shit.