Merry Christmas everyone, and Happy New Year :)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I've been stalling for too long now. There were two paths I could make. One decision that would change everything. They've been staring me in the face for quite a while now, and it is time that I chose. I could decide to sit by; fake my ignorance to Satan's plans, and follow him blindly towards his dream of conquering the realm of the living. I could take that easy path and know that in the end I would still come out on the winning side.
But how would I feel about myself? What emotions would I be plagued with for the rest of eternity? Grief? Remorse? Would I feel distgusting and even more like a monster than I already do? But what if the monster side of me grew dominant and suddenly I stopped caring about all the human lives wasted? What would I become if I lost control of that inner demon inside me again, and ended up playing an even larger role in the human's destruction then I could think of? Would I forget myself entirely?
Do I want to forget who I am? Do I want to forget who the human Trisnae was?
The idea of choosing the easy path was alluring for all the wrong reasons. Could I live, or I should say exist knowing that I could have done something to prevent the chaos?
This is where the issue of my second option comes up; I could choose to fight. I could choose to work against my master, the demon I swore eternal loyalty to, the creature who binds me to him in a contract so strong I have groveled at his feet and devoted my entire being to his will...even if on the inside I was distgusted with both of our existances.
If I chose to rebel I could be caught. I would be tortured beyond the limits of any imaginable suffering. Satan would not be merciful. If I somehow managed to succeed though, I would win so much more than what I could loose.
Who am I anymore? I've been trying to figure this out for too long; always asking the questions, but never really trying to find the answers. The only reason I can say why, is that I'm afraid of who I might be.
I try to think about the human Trisnae and try to think about what she would have chosen. Would she have sat back, or would she have tried to prevent this catastrophe from begining?
What would Mommy say if she could see me right now? What choice would she want me to make? Oh, I want to see her so badly! It's been so long now that I've almost forgotten her face. I keep holding onto the murky memories of her, but both the youth of childhood and the blindness of the human's eyes makes her always look so murky, so hazy, like in a dream.
If Mommy could see me now, she would be ashamed of me. She'd be disgusted with whom I've become. She wouldn't hold me or smile into my dead tangle of hair and tickle my ear with her laughs. I'm a monster. Mommy is too good for a monster like me.
This is how I made up my mind. This is the reason I have chosen which path I am taking. It's all because of you Mommy.
I was going to stop Satan. This monster needed to be finished off for good.
* * * *
"Rosie! Rosie! Where are you?" I call out, standing in the middle of the graveyard where I had last seen the angel. She's the person I trust most to help me right now.
"Rosie! Roooosie!" I call out desperatly. I'm getting so frustrated with all of this now. She can just appear out of nowhere whenever she likes, but when I actually need to talk to her-
"What are you doing here demon child?" the angel's voice calls from somewhere behind me. "Have you finally made your decision? It has been a while since we last talked."
I look up and see her sitting delicatly on a tree limb in the middle of the graveyard about twenty feet away. I look at the angel's distressed, and somewhat exasperated expression for a moment before speaking.
"I've come to make a bargin with you," I say, my tone indicating that I was not in the mood for her annoying superior attitude today.
Rosie looks at me warily for a moment before elegantly swinging down to the ground from her perch and walking towards me. "Very well...what might you have in mind?"
"I will help you angel...If and only if you do this for me: I will help you stop my master, if you swear that you will free me from the Gaurd and bring me to my Mother," I say coolly. From the angel's expression I could tell that she was not suprised by my demands, but not at all happy about them either.
"I will be honest with you Trisnae; theres nothing I can do to reunite you with your mother. You made your choice about your fate long ago-"
"And yet you still ask me for my help. You ask me to go against my fate and my loyalties to help you. You say that there is nothing you can change but you still ask me to help you. Forgive me angel when I say that your lie is disgusting for me to hear," I say walking around the angel in an almost menacing manor. Like a wild animal circling it's prey. Rosie knew I was right of course, but she is unreasonably stubborn.
The angel pouts and grumbleato herself. I wait silently to hear what she would say next. Rosie finally sighs and look at me with anger and remorse saying "Fine demon. I will do what I can to uphold my end of the deal, if you succussfully uphold yours. Even though it goes against both of our natures, we will do this to save the human realm," she says in defeat. We look at each other for a moment, both glowering at each other.
"Good."
* * * *
The sun would rise soon, and if I didn't hurry, I would be at risk of being caught. The Devil has a secret library where he keeps all his records of plans, and of time and history. The entrance within the castle is hidden from all but the Devil's eyes, but what he doesn't know is that I know where the other entrance is. Another hidden passageway, inside the last circle of Hell.
I sneak through the darkness like a shadow, and glide noislessly through the last circle, smelling at the air for signs that I was being followed. No souls are stirring in the darkness, all was quiet. deadly quiet. My upper body tingles with tension.
I come to the entrance of an old tower. The stones were crumbling growing green and blue from aging mold. I opened the entrance door and snuck inside. I don't waste time looking around, but head straight to the top of the tower where the hidden passageway was waiting.
It's just a simple door. Inside the last room in the tower, one would have just mistaken it for a simple closet if they were to stumble upon it. If someone had bothered to try to open it, they'd just assume that someone else had locked it before and they would move on.
The key is around my neck. The key that could open the door to the human realm. The key that would also open any door. Quickly inserting the key and fumbling like a clumsy fool, I open the door and stood there shaking. I am scared to death that I'm actually doing this!
After a long walk through the dark passageway hidden behind the door, I make it into the library.
I have only been inside the library once. It is very large, and full of shelves taller than buildings all packed tight with anciently bound books, some with cobwebs smothering them, and others begining to disinegrate from age. A thick layer of dust lays like a blanket over many shelves and spiders and other maggots crawl through the musky carpet on the floor. I open a book just for curiosity's sake and stare at the ancient texts; there are records of wars faught, and prophecies made, and grotesque illustrations of men being ripped into pieces and children's decapitated heads lying in pools of blood. I close the book and place it back on the shelf without a second glance.
I head towards the youngest section of books and records. The library is almost like a diary. A diary of Satan's containing all of history, and all the prophecies for the future. It is a vast vault, rich in knowledge of all the evil of creation.
There is a book sticking out from it's place on it's shelf slightly. Carefully, I slide it out and open the book to a random page. I need to start looking somewhere. Any sort of clue, anything! Anything that would help me find out how to stop the Devil.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi.
I hope you liked this newest chapter :) It needs A LOT of editing but...that's probably not going to happen for a while. haha. One day perhaps.
Your criticism is always appreciated. I'm sort of tired of people reading, but never giving me any feedback. I can't improve at all if no one gives me any advice! RAWR!
Okays. Rant is over. Bye!
-TheNinjaWriter