"Do you think it will get better?" Lyla suddenly asks as I continue to load the guns.
"Better?"
"Rayden's death," she mutters, taking the loaded gun from me and putting it to the side. "And my parents' for that matter."
"Better, no." I shake my head. "I still remember the loss of my parents like it was yesterday."
"Me too," she replies, her expression forlorn.
"It'll get easier to deal with as time passes though," I assure her. "I still think about him every single minute of every day."
"He really liked you," she says softly and I look up at her surprised.
"He liked you too," I reply and she nods, turning back to the guns.
"Are we ready?" Jordan asks, poking his head into the room.
"Just on the last one now," I reply and he nods, walking in and grabbing a couple of weapons from the surface beside me before disappearing.
"Are you scared?" Lyla asks and I bite my lip, focusing my attention on the gun. It's been two weeks since Rayden's death and we're finally ready to make our last move before we get the fuck out of here.
Looking up at Lyla I can see the panic in her eyes, her expression pleading with me to reassure her, but what can I say but the truth?
"As always, I'm petrified," I answer honestly.
*~*~*
Walking down towards the city hall we keep to the back streets, four of us running ahead to check for Enforcers before they urge the rest of the group forward.
"Hey," Claudia whispers beside me and I grin.
"You okay?" I ask and she nods.
"I can't wait to get out of Nottingham." She smiles. "No Enforcers, airy countryside-"
"We hope there are no Enforcers," I retort and she shoves my shoulder.
"Don't be such a downer!" Claudia grins as we stop once more. "I just want us to be away from all their rules."
"Me too," I agree.
"So that you and Zac can finally admit your undying love for each other?" she teases and I roll my eyes.
"Definitely not," I retort.
"I can't believe that you two are still in denial."
"We are not!" I protest as we continue down the narrow path.
"Please!" She scoffs. "You don't think we hear you at it all night?"
"Sex doesn't mean feelings," I argue and she smirks.
"It does when you wake up and bring him breakfast in bed, or when you kiss in public, or when you spend hours laughing with each other in the kitchen, or when-"
"Alright," I cut her off as she laughs quietly. "There may be... some feelings."
"I knew it!" Claudia exclaims. "You have to tell him."
"No! It's not even a big deal."
"Forgive me if I'm wrong but you two have both spent the last five years fucking random people." She smirks as I stare at her wide eyed. "This is a big deal. For both of you."
"Even more reason not to tell him then," I hiss quietly as Kieran overtakes us.
"Shut up." She rolls her eyes. "You two are so fucking stubborn it hurts. Take it from me, it took Jordan and I over a year to tell each other we loved one another, but looking back I wish I'd done it sooner."
"You two are different."
"How?" she exclaims and I shrug.
"Zac and I..." I trail off. "I don't think he wants a relationship."
"You won't know unless you ask." Claudia scoffs. "You've both changed each other."
"We have?"
"Hell yes," she exclaims. "It's easy to see, the two of you work well together, in some weird, bizarre way."
"Thanks." I smirk as we approach the bottom of the hill.
"You're welcome." She grins before walking away to stand next to Jordan.
As we stop, I look over at the city hall, the building that has stood pride of place in Nottingham's Market Square for hundreds of years. It's always been the central point of the city, even after the war, the State latching onto it quickly, making it a base for their ceremonies and meetings.
We're about to destroy a piece of culture, a huge part of the history of this city, yet somehow it feels right. It's time to move on, it's time to take out those who are pressing their boots down on our neck.
"You okay?" Zac asks softly, appearing beside me.
"As I'll ever be," I reply. "You?"
"As I'll ever be," he echoes.
"Hey, Zac!" a guy yells from behind him. "We've got to go!"
"Alright!" he calls over his shoulder before turning back to face me. "Well-"
"Be safe," I cut him off, smiling at him.
He grins at my words, reaching up and moving a stray piece of hair out of my face. "You too," he replies before letting his hand drop and turning away.
"Wait," I call out.
Zac looks back towards me, confusion in his eyes. I don't hesitate to think about what I'm doing, instead throwing myself towards him, smashing my lips against his in a quick, hasty kiss. I'm scared every single time we attempt anything like this and use the time to pour all my pent up emotions into the kiss, praying that he'll understand.
I'm hesitant to pull away, the look in his eyes clearly one of shock. He gives me a warm smile, the most genuine one that I have ever seen grace his lips, before he turns away, making his way back to Riley. Fuck, I'm scared.
"Let's do this." Kayla smiles at me, handing me one of the guns. I nod, watching as Sam takes another, Claudia following close behind. The four of us will be covering one side of the hall entrance, Kieran, Anna, Heidi and one of Riley's friends on the other.
I wish Bridget was here, she would have fucking lived for this. She was always waiting for the perfect time to attack the State, and yet she never got to help us with any of it. I miss her every single day, her little jokes, her no nonsense attitude. Plus, I miss the catty comments she used to shoot at Anna.
I take a deep breath before beginning to follow the others closer to the city hall. Six of the people who came with Riley are situated on the upper floors of the old department store to the side of the hall, poised and ready with their guns to help when they're needed. That's a comfort, at least.
We're close to the entrance before a few Enforcers start appearing, Kieran effortlessly gunning them down, a silencer muzzling his gun. My heart is racing in my chest, the dark of the night only making it harder, my feet stumbling blindly over one another.
Eventually we approach the entrance, all of us lined up against the wall as Zac approaches with Riley and four others, two backpacks slung over their backs. They walk up to the entrance with purpose, Zac quickly glancing at me before they disappear inside.
I lean my head back on the wall behind me, desperate for my heart to stop racing. The mental pep talk telling myself to calm down does nothing to help, and I soon find myself tapping my foot on the ground.
"Stop it," Kayla hisses. "Jace used to do that."
"Oh," I whisper, instantly stopping. Shit, I didn't mean to bring all that up for her again. "I'm sorry!"
"It's annoying." She smirks and I instantly relax at her calm expression. We descend into silence once more and I swear everyone can hear my heart thumping against my rib cage, the sound reverberating around my ears.
A flurry of gunshots suddenly sound out from inside the building and I curse under my breath, shutting my eyes and taking a deep breath. It wasn't Zac. It wasn't Zac. It couldn't have been Zac.
Claudia's hand suddenly reaches out to clutch mine and I send her a small smile, grateful for the comfort.
I'm so done with this shitty life, I just want to move on, to be happy with Zac. I want to turn back the clock five years so that we can go on normal dates, eat out in restaurants and venture on holidays abroad.
Tenerife was always my favourite place to go, the temperature just perfect in September when Mum and Dad used to drag us out of school to avoid the holiday price increases. Mum and Jake would lie by the pool as Dad and I explored the area, climbing over volcanic rock to see what was beyond...
"Riley!" The sudden exclamation comes from Anna, and I turn my attention to see her rushing forward to grab onto the tall tattoo artist as he runs out of the building, clutching at his bleeding arm. "Are you okay?"
"Where's Zac?" I snap, pulling away from Claudia and walking towards them. "Where is he?"
"We got the Enforcers, but..." Riley trails off. "There was this girl, she said she had to talk with him."
"Gia," I breathe out, my eyes darting to the closed doors of the hall. Fuck, no.
*~*~*
"Let him go!" I hiss, arms raised as my sister aims her gun at Riley from the other end of the large room.
"Why?" she retorts. "So that he can go and warn your Resistance?"
"Because this has nothing to do with him," I argue, quickly stepping in front of him and using the opportunity to kick the backpack further into the room.
"I've already killed his friends, Zac." Gia grins, the bodies littering the floor. "One more won't hurt." Kneeling down, I quickly unzip the backpack and show her what's inside.
"What the fuck is that?" she snaps, her eyes scanning the metal device.
"It's a bomb." I shrug. "If you don't let him go I'll detonate it, right here, right now." I hover my finger over the button, my sister's expression wavering slightly.
"No you won't." She scoffs and I smirk before lowering my finger. She's right, I won't. Not because I'm here or because she's my fucking family, but because Emilia is far too close to survive the blast. "Stop!" Gia yells as my finger lands on the trigger. "Fine, he can go!"
Standing back up, I glance over at an overwhelmed looking Riley, his arm bleeding profusely from one of my sister's earlier shots. "Go," I tell him and he glances between my sister and I, clearly unsure of what to do. "Riley!" I snap. "Go!"
Turning away, he legs it back down the corridor as I stand up, away from the ready to be detonated bomb. "Why are you doing this?" I ask, eyes fixing on my older sister.
"I could ask you the same question," she replies, not daring to lower her gun.
"Really?" I scoff. "I've been tortured under this rule, I've had to endure a month in Killmoor prison. My wife was sent to the Cell because of a mistake that I made. We were forced together even though we didn't know each other, told that we must have a baby to avoid consequences!" I snap, my voice rising. "And you want to know why I'm not happy about it?"
"I... I didn't know you were in Killmoor," Gia replies. "If I had, I would have gotten you out."
"This isn't about me," I retort, shaking my head in disbelief.
"We're family!"
"We are nothing," I yell, the loud echo banging off the walls. "You made us nothing."
"That's not true," she argues and I let out a low laugh.
"You fucking left me."
"It wasn't my intention," she says. "One day I was going to find you."
"I've been looking for you for years."
"All I can say is that I'm sorry," Gia replies. "This," she gestures at the room, a symbol of the fucking State, "had to be done."
"No it fucking didn't," I argue, shaking my head at her.
"Zac!" The sudden high pitched yell from the familiar sounding girl has my eyes widening, still fixed on my sister as I worry what she might do.
"Stop!" Gia orders, her gun still trained on me. I glance over at Emilia, closely followed by Claudia and Jordan, my loyal friends having not let her come inside alone. All of them glance between my sister, myself, and the backpack between us.
"What are you doing?" Emilia snaps. "That's your fucking brother!"
"I know," Gia retorts. "But you are nothing." She moves the gun away, instead focusing it on my feisty blonde. Fear suddenly overwhelms my stomach, my heart racing as I hold out my arms. Don't do it, Gia.
Emilia glares back at her, not even looking phased by the death sentence that she's now facing.
"Don't you fucking dare," I warn Gia, my voice low as I take a step towards Emilia.
"Move," Gia orders Emilia, gesturing with her gun. "Towards him."
Emilia slowly edges closer to me and I reach out, grabbing onto her hand before I pull her close to me. "Gia, I swear-"
"I can't have you all destroying my State," she cuts me off, her eyes narrowed at me.
"Your State." Emilia scoffs, crossing her arms. I almost roll my eyes at her attitude, grabbing onto her and moving her behind me slightly. I normally love her bitchy side, but right now, looking down the barrel of a gun? Wind your neck in, Emilia.
"Zac," Gia smiles, "Come with me."
"Excuse me?" I exclaim. I'm sorry, what?
"You heard me." She shrugs, her gun still aimed at us. "Join me," she pleads and I raise my eyebrows.
"Not a fucking chance." I scoff, Emilia's hand curling around my arm.
"Alright." Gia sighs. "That's a shame. It would have been nice to have you by my side. I've been really lonely the last four years you know? I miss Mum and Poppy. I wonder what happened to them."
"Don't give me the sob story," I snap. "They would be ashamed at what you've turned into. Dad too."
"Fuck you, Zac." Gia narrows her eyes at me. "I guess there's only one thing left to do." She smirks, her gaze moving across to Claudia and Jordan. "I was wondering if he was still your best friend," she exclaims, moving her hand to aim the gun at Jordan.
"Don't you even-" The loud gunshot cuts off my words as Gia pulls the trigger.
Everything happens in slow motion, myself frozen to the floor, eyes wide with shock as Emilia screams the most blood curdling scream I have ever heard.
Claudia reaches out, shoving Jordan to the side. He tumbles onto the floor just as the bullet soars through Claudia's chest, knocking her back. She hits the wall behind her, a pool of red appearing instantly on her grey top as she gasps, sinking down and leaving a trail of blood in her wake.
"Claudia!" Jordan screams, launching himself towards his wife as her eyes turn glassy.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
I'm not crying, you are!!!
No seriously, I genuinely cried writing this. This was planned from the very beginning, the very first time I ever introduced Claudia and Jordan. I fell in love with her as the story has progressed, and I truly didn't want to do this, but I had to stay true to my original plan.
Please don't hate me too much! Come bash me on Insta:
(P.S. pretty please don't do that... just throw some support my way instead!!)