"Silence. How long it lasted, I couldn't tell. It might have been five seconds, it might have been a minute. Time wasn't fixed. It wavered, stretched, shrank. Or was it me that wavered, stretched, and shrank in the silence? I was warped in the folds of time, like a reflection in a fun house mirror."
— Haruki Murakami
───※ ·❆· ※───
SASUKE
"Older brother!"
Sasuke's eyes brightened at the sight of his older brother. It had been long since he had last seen him, almost a month passed by and Sasuke had counted every second of it, knowing that when Itachi was back he'd train him like he had promised. Ever since Itachi was appointed Anbu Captain, his schedule became very tight and his visits were scarce. It also wasn't much of a surprise when he came back from missions tired and exhausted, but what was a surprise was the fact that he looked more tired than usual. Sick even. As though the missions were taking a physical toll on his health.
Itachi smiled, kneeling to Sasuke's height as he ruffled his hair. The younger Uchiha's smile wavered, noticing the accentuated, dark circles beneath his eyes.
"Sasuke! There's my favourite person in the world."
He grinned goofily, his cheeks donning a bright blush as he tackled his brother into a hug. "I missed you! You were gone for so long!"
Itachi released a chuckle, wrapping his arms around him as he hoisted Sasuke on his hip and stood upright.
"I'm sorry Sasuke, I've been very busy lately. I hope you can forgive me."
Sasuke blinked, before a wide smile made it's way to his face. "It's okay, I know you are tired so you can rest all you want. Then you can train me tomorrow!"
He watched as his older brother's smile disappeared, his eyes creasing in sadness. "I don't think I could train you tomorrow, Sasuke. I have an appointment and then I have to resume with my duties."
"B-But..." Sasuke frowned, his prior excitement vanishing in an instant.
Excuses. That was another thing he noticed. Sasuke hadn't a clue what these appointments were for, his mind was unable to decipher why his older brother didn't want to spend time with him anymore. Was Sasuke annoying? Did he no longer want to hang out with him because he's wasting time? The more he refused, the more the younger Uchiha felt his heart hurt. His mother taught him that when someone's heart hurt, it meant that they were sad. And when someone was sad, they release tears from their eyes. Though, the other kids in his Clan teased him for being a cry baby, so if he cried in front of his brother he was sure to tease him as well.
"Oh, it's... fine." Sasuke pressed his lips together, wiggling himself out of Itachi's hold. "I'll... just ask older brother Shisui to train me. You don't have to."
He swallowed deeply, looking away. He felt sad, incredibly sad. Not only was Itachi being distant, his father was acting strangely as well. He was stricter, meaner and raised his voice often. Sasuke no longer felt happiness within his home, but rather a heavy weight on his chest that wouldn't go away. The weight only became lighter whenever his mother was there to make his favourite dish; tomato Onigiri and told him interesting stories. But it didn't prevent the fact that he felt so... lonely.
"Sasuke..." Itachi started off, before his eyes widened.
Harsh coughs racked his body, one that startled Sasuke as he stared at his older brother who was hunched over, his eyes squeezed shut and his hand covering his mouth. Moments after, his coughs ceased, Itachi turned his back to him and looked at his hand. Although, he tried to hide it, Sasuke saw it clearly. A red substance. Blood. On the corner of his lips and blotches decorating his palm. His eyes watered in worry, Itachi was sick? Was this why he had appointments often? Why he refused to hang out with Sasuke? Why he looked so weak and pale?
"Older brother..." Sasuke whispered sadly. "Are... Are you sick?"
Itachi looked startled. For a few seconds he stared at him, zoning into his own world before he gave a small smiled.
"No, Sasuke, I'm fine. Don't worry about it okay." Itachi poked his forehead. Sasuke blinked, a small pout making it's way to his face as he rubbed the spot Itachi had poked.
"Maybe I'll train you next time."
"I'm sorry Sasuke, I'm afraid I'm busy."
"We'll train another day."
"I'm sorry, we can train next time."
"Next time, Sasuke."
"Next time..."
But that time never came.
He was standing alone in his room.
The storm outside was heavy and the wind whistled fiercely and coruscated in mighty gallops, almost as if it was going to wedge the windows right off it's hinges. It was thunderous and the skies were darkened ominously since nightfall.
Sasuke's eyes widened, recalling the event. His body was covered in sweat, blood and dirt. His hand cradled his red, throbbing cheek as he stared at his Father with pure fear in his eyes. Sasuke didn't know it was possible to fear the people who had your own blood running through their veins. People that were meant to be called family. People that were meant to love and care for you. People that were meant to comfort you when you were upset. He didn't know that the same people could be the ones to have created your sadness.
This was the first time his Father had hit him.
"Stop crying, damn it!" His Father roared, the second strike hurting much more than the first.
Sasuke collapsed to the ground, his body trembling, his face pulsating continuously with a painful sting, his cheeks flooding with tears that he so desperately tried to hide. Mother and Shisui went with Itachi to his appointment, leaving Sasuke alone with his father unaware of the fact that Sasuke didn't want to be left alone with him. When he was alone, his Father became a different person. A demon in disguise. The very monster that Sasuke feared was hiding under his bed. This was the first time Sasuke felt true pain, pain worse than the time he had broken his leg, or when he had cut his arm or when he had fallen from a tree and hit his head.
It was heart break.
And within each day, the crack on his heart grew bigger and bigger as the number of strikes multiplied by ten, and then twenty, and then thirty and so on. It was when he learned a valuable lesson: to not cry. Crying was a weakness, displaying emotions was a weakness, especially in front of his father. He'd prey on his weaknesses and used it against him. He had also learned that even within his own home, he could never be himself in fear that he'd get punished. Over time, Sasuke had forgotten what it meant to be his own person, someone who hadn't followed the footsteps of his father.
Sasuke feared that one day, he'd become just like the monster his Father was.
That was until he met her.
All of a sudden, he was in the Land of Waves. Tears fresh on his face, a foreign sense of fear brewing in his chest, his head struck by lightning unable to wrap his mind around the matter at hand other than the body of his teammate in his arms. Dawn looked so peaceful, her silence was deafening, an endless tune that played in his ears. He'd never been this afraid of the silence until this moment. Sasuke realised that this was the first time he had cried in years, all because he was scared for someone other than himself. All because he feared that he had disappointed yet another person. All because he couldn't imagine a world where the person he had been enraptured by since the moment she walked past the Academy doors, didn't exist.
"What... did you do?" Sasuke said, horror swirling in his wide eyes.
Her body tumbled backwards, falling into his arms as Sasuke stared at her face. No... it wasn't meant to end like this- she wasn't meant to end like this, this couldn't be happening.
"It's okay..." Dawn said softly. Her voice was delicate like glass, something that could be shattered in an instant. He could barely hear her, but he didn't care. He wanted to hear her speak, she had to speak. "I'm... okay with this, Sasuke... it's okay."
"It's not okay!" Sasuke shouted angrily, choking on his words. Just a moment ago he was happy, happy that he had unlocked his Clan's Kekkei Genkai, happy that he was more able to protect his teammates, but he couldn't even do that.
What was the point of having power if you couldn't even use it to protect the people you care about?
He shook his head in denial. "It's not okay..." Sasuke whispered, his arms shaking around her, careful to not move the needles poking out of her skin. "Why the hell did you go in front of me? Why?!"
"I don't... know." She rasped, her eyes fluttering shut. "I just... I just didn't want to see... anyone die again."
Her breathing stopped.
"No, no, no, no-" Sasuke shook her shoulders. "Wake up! Damn it- don't- you can't- leave like this, you're, you're too young, no... this can't be happening..." he stared at her, his mind swirling with chaos.
Anger.
He was consumed with anger. Pent up rage that originated within a shell it outgrew, one that was dangerously powerful and near the verge of exploding. Sasuke was a ticking time bomb. The years spent in solitude, anger, frustration, sadness and most significantly: fear. He was angry at his father for manipulating him into a version of himself and treated him like a rag-doll, doing as he pleased with him. Inflicting scars of painful memories, stunting the tears that so desperately wanted a release, teaching him lessons that he'd never forget, for forcing a child into an adult. Because of him, he hadn't had the chance to grow up in the way other kids did.
Frustration.
Sasuke was frustrated with the lies, with the excuses, with not being good enough for everyone. For not being the person others wanted him to be. For not being as strong as Itachi, or as emotionless as his father. For having such expectations bestowed upon him that he couldn't take a second to breathe and think about what he wanted. Sasuke felt frustrated, because no one ever asked what he wanted. He had no choice, no control over his actions, he was told what to do, how to behave, how to act and when to speak and who to be and what not to be—
Loneliness.
He felt so, so alone. No one was able to understand him. No one knew the emotions he felt.
Except one person.
Sasuke stared at himself, or rather, his younger self with sadness in his eyes. He reached his hand out, noticing how his younger self mirrored his actions. Though, the moment their hands touched, the glass mirror shattered and all he saw was a man. A tall man, with white skin, yellow, beady eyes, long hair and a lizard-like tongue. Orochimaru. His name was Orochimaru. The man who went undercover as a Grass Genin. The man who had hurt Dawn. The man who granted him a mark, one that throbbed woodenly on his neck.
"I gifted you power, Sasuke." Orochimaru mused, a smirk on his face.
"Why?" Sasuke asked, furrowing his eyebrows. "Why me?"
"Because I can see right through you." He said. "I can see the pain in your eyes, I can see the desire to become stronger, the hunger for power. You want to become the person you were told you couldn't be, you want to prove everyone wrong. You want to be the one to outshine your older brother."
"You want vengeance."
"Vengeance?" Sasuke repeated, the pathway he was unsure he'd take becoming clearer by the second.
"Yes..." Orochimaru smiled, as if he could read the thoughts rushing in his mind. "Vengeance. And you can do so now, you just have to give in. Don't fight the power I've given you. Once you embrace it, you'll know that you'd made the right choice."
Again, he was being told what to do.
"You hurt my teammates." Sasuke muttered, clenching his fists. "You hurt her."
"She was collateral damage-"
"Shut the hell up!" Sasuke gritted his teeth.
The anger, it coursed through his veins and made the pain on his neck amplified. Though, the amplification granted him an exhilarating rush of energy and power, one that overwhelmed him, making his bones strengthen, his chakra replenished. He felt invincible.
"You feel that, don't you?" Orochimaru pointed out knowingly. "That's only a minuscule fraction of what you can do— of what you're capable of. Don't fight it, Sasuke. You'll thank me for it."
Don't... fight it?
───※ ·❆· ※───
Dawn's POV
Strike two.
The moment my eyes opened, all I felt was power. It was nothing compared to my prior moment of weakness, the pain of my broken leg, the deep laceration on my skin, the fatigue from controlling the wind, the headache from the voice in my head, it was nothing in contrast to the amount of energy flowing through my veins like an endless stream of water.
Why do I feel so...
Powerful? Because I lent you my power. My eyes widened. Power? Good luck trying to control it. It laughed.
I scanned the area, a headache pounded at my temples, visions flickering past my eyes. Visions of what had occurred whilst I was asleep. Sakura looking after us the entire night. Jiro disappearing. Lee fighting Dosu and Zaku. Sakura cutting her hair. Sakura getting began up. Team ten arriving. Lee's team arriving. It all fuelled the anger I felt. A part of me knew that I wasn't in control of my actions, I couldn't even begin to understand what was happening right now. But that didn't matter, I just felt... anger.
"You underestimated us..." Zaku spoke, narrowing his eyes. "Our objective differs from that of the exam, we don't care about the scrolls nor do we care about this stupid test."
"Well, that makes my job easier, doesn't it?" I chuckled, walking towards the Sound Ninja.
With each step, a burning pain on my left leg as well as my right begged for relief, but it was only pain.
It was only just pain.
"Dawn..." Sakura said in surprise. "How... How are you walking?"
I stared at her, my mind recognising her instantly, wanting to comfort her and tell her that she didn't need to worry anymore. Yet, my body thought otherwise. It continued to walked towards Zaku, a grin making it's way to my face. Yet, I wasn't happy. It wasn't me who indulged in the misery of others and thrived in the pain of my broken bones prodding my flesh and tearing my muscles, in fact all I wanted to do was scream out in pain. However, the darkness, the power, it was overwhelming. Too potent for me to understand or control.
"Oh? One of the pig's teammates awaken, maybe I should teach you a lesson like I had done to-"
Snap.
The sound of his bones cracking resonated in the air like a deadly wail of a dying person. A part of me even envisioned the sight of his dead body. I moved quickly, quicker than I had ever could before. No one could grasp onto what had happened, until I had grabbed Zaku's bare hand, the sheer touch of the foreign power within me sizzling into his skin and searing his flesh, before I simply clenched my fingers which was enough to bend his wrist as well as imitate the feeling of fire burning beneath his skin. His screams surprisingly felt like music to my ears, as my mouth curl into a sadistic smile.
"Whoops." The words fell from my lips mockingly. "Accident."
Another scream escaped his mouth as I tightened my grip, amusement dancing in my eyes as I watched his body wither in pain and fear. Fear of me. He was scared of me and I loved it. I wasn't powerless, he had no control because I was controlling him. I could do whatever I wanted, because it was in my power.
This isn't you.
"I-I'm sorry!" Zaku cried out. "Please release me- please! You can have our scroll! Take it!"
"I don't want the scroll, I just wanted to see you in pain." I released my grip, smirking as he scattered away from me, similar to a mouse scurrying at the sight of a cat.
Lifting my gaze, I felt a small tug in my stomach as I stared at the faces of the Genin around me, mixed with both fear and shock, for some reason that didn't do well with me at all. My eyes landed on the two Sound Ninja, Dosu and Kin, determined to make them endure pain ten times more intense than I had inflicted on Zaku.
They're scared of you. They think of you as a monster.
A monster?
That word affected me more than I'd like to admit, despite having it singed into my mind that a monster was what I had been told I was going to be, a monster that I had always been and will continue to be. Surely, because now, I truly felt like one, feeling and seeing the one thing I was afraid of becoming, unravelling itself of it's convoluted folds before my eyes.
Tilting my head, my eyes darkened. "So, which one of you are next? Unless you want me to pick..."
"Stop it, Dawn!" Sakura exclaimed. Even though she was scared, I could see the worry on her face. Worry? She was worried about me?
Of course she is worried about you, she's your friend. Don't you remember?
I do.
"This isn't you. Snap out of it, okay?!"
This isn't me?
The headache I had intensified as I clutched my head, my fingers digging into my scalp. This.. wasn't me. I'm the one not in control of whatever it was possessing me. I wouldn't inflict such pain on others when it wasn't necessary. A small cry of pain escaped from my lips as I felt the darkness that slithered around my limbs retreat to the depths of my mind, the sudden change causing me to collapse to the ground. My body felt like it was on fire, fire in my legs, fire in my head. I was on fire.
What is happening to me?
I didn't want to cry, I wasn't one to cry in front of others. But the literal pain I was in forced the tears out of my eyes. I felt so embarrassed and pathetic. One second I was stuck in a nightmare my mind created so realistically that it became a physical form of torture, as to allowing my rage and my worry overpower my morals and turn me into something unrecognisable. I couldn't even recognise myself, it was like I was staring at a version of myself much more colder and full of intense pain and darkness. Such darkness I had never felt before, such pain that fuelled the shadows and became the source of an unknown power.
It made it even worse knowing that others had seen a version of me that I have never seen before. I was shaking like a leaf and away from the sea of calmness. The ocean was wild and chaotic. It felt like chaos.
"It's okay..." Sakura navigated her way towards me, wrapping her arm around my shoulder to lean into her embrace. "It's okay. You're okay."
My eyes watered even more, her hold providing a source of comfort and assurance knowing that she didn't hate me or think of me differently. A part of me was aware that deep inside, she was just as curious as everyone else as to what happened or who I truly was. I didn't know much besides the fact that this was something I was born with, that the fact that I was kidnapped in my younger age had something to do with the darkness inside of me. Was I.. a Jinchuriki? Was that why I was taken? Did my parents willingly put an entity of evil and darkness inside me, their own child?
When I thought things couldn't possibly worsen, I felt the temperature drop a thousand times more colder than it already was. A feeling stirred within me as I was drawn to the swirling mass of purple and black Chakra emitting from Sasuke, his skin was covered with black flames that encased his body up till the tips of his fingers. What captured my attention the most was his Sharingan eyes that were entirely dissimilar, they were filled with rage, with anger. Was this the result of the mark on his neck?
This is similar to what had happened to me... Presumably, the mark on his neck gave him power, but there was something else to it. Something of his own fused with the power of the mark, his emotions fuelled the chakra swirling around him disgorging it into purple mist. I was both mesmerised and worried. Knowing something that appeared to be beautiful was, in fact, deadly.
"Sasuke..." Sakura's eyes widened, wearing a nervous frown. "What's happening to you?"
"Don't worry about it." Sasuke spared her a glance, her body tensing at the look in his eyes. Even I froze when we made eye-contact. He pulled his gaze away and stared at the Sound Ninja. "I feel stronger, more powerful."
His words echoed the thoughts I had prior to his awakening.
"He gave me a gift." Sasuke looked at his hands, clenching and unclenching them. "He gave me power. I understand what I need to do now..."
"So... it was you who attacked my teammate."
Despite being heavily wounded on his right arm, Zaku ignored the warning signals and sent a flight of sound waves towards Sasuke, one that tore the tree behind the Uchiha into two pieces and lifted the dirt off the ground creating a wind of dust. Once the dust settled back to the ground, Sasuke was nowhere to be seen, that was until he appeared behind the foolish Sound Ninja and chopped the side of his hand onto Zaku's shoulder. He flew through the air, landing clumsily on his feet. Sasuke, giving him no time to rest, used his Phoenix flower Jutsu, sending bullets of fire towards Zaku who attempted to counteract his attack again.
"You're getting overconfident!"
I narrowed my eyes. Says the person who was begging me to not rip his arm off it's sockets a minute ago. Even if I wasn't in control, Zaku was foolish for trying to fight a battle he couldn't win. Especially with a wound like that on his arm.
What Zaku had failed to see pass the bullet of flames was the Shuriken that engraved onto his skin. Sasuke swiftly ran towards Zaku, bending his body at knee level and dug his foot into the Sound Ninja's back, his right hand holding Zaku's whilst his other hand was purposefully pressing down on the wound I had created. Zaku released an ear-piercing scream as Sasuke dug his nails into the burnt skin, the bone of his flesh practically seeping through. I looked away guiltily, it wasn't my intention to have inflicted a wound like that, even if he was the enemy the most I would've done was knock him unconscious. It was better than the possibility of never being able to use your arm again.
"Looks like Dawn already did a number on you." Sasuke mused, a cruel smirk vibrant on his face as he tightened his grip. "Maybe I should finish off the job."
This wasn't him.
Another snap rang out, one that stole my breath away in an instant. If I had continued, that would've been me inflicting unnecessary anguish upon another. Thinking about it now, I'd rather it had been me than Sasuke, as afterwards he'd be enduring the same amount of internal confusion and guilt. The last thing I'd want to happen was for Sasuke to lose himself amidst a darkness that he could've overcame, the same darkness that had tormented me for years. I refuse to let that happen to him, I'll make sure of it.
"That's enough of that temper tantrum, Uchiha brat."
Jiro leaped over a bush and landed in front of Sasuke, his teeth bared and his body straightened. He glanced towards me, his face moulding into worry and sadness before his red eye fixated into a glare. A small weight lifted off of my shoulders, Jiro was safe and luckily hadn't encountered any trouble wherever he went. Though, I was glad he hadn't seen what happened. He was the only person I didn't want viewing me as a monster.
"Get out of my way." Sasuke sneered.
"Jiro's right Sasuke." Sakura laid me gently against a tree before standing up, a defying look in her eyes. I admired her for managing to stay so strong, I'd expected her to break down assuming she'd break under the tension of the situation. Instead, she pushed away her fears and maintained a steady head.
"Please, just... stop it. They've learnt their lesson, there's no need to continue. It's done, I'm safe. We're safe."
Sasuke's gaze travelled to my direction, his eyes latching onto my bleeding thigh and swollen leg that had turn purple and was incredibly bruised. For a moment, I thought he was going to continue his assault until his eyes met mine, softening as the flames on his body receded back to the mark, his Sharingan deactivating. As the tension slowly dissolved, my cheeks grew warm, unsure whether it was from the heat of his gaze or the wavering fever I had.
"You're really strong." Dosu commented, his eyes drawn towards Sasuke both in awe and puzzlement. "It is clear that this is a battle we are unable to win, especially in your current state. Please accept this as a token of my admiration as well as my gratitude towards your mercy." He slowly placed his Earth scroll on the ground, wary whether the current onlookers were going to attack him or allow him to leave peacefully.
Before he could take a footstep away, Sakura intervened. "Wait! We still have questions. Who is Orochimaru and what did he do to Sasuke? You said he was under the Leaf's supervision? Why?"
Dosu stared at her cautiously, before releasing a sigh. "I don't know much, in fact I am as confused as you are. I wasn't aware Orochimaru took interest in an Uchiha, let alone Sasuke. But I do know something..."
His eyes met mine. "He very well knows who you are, in fact he'd had his eyes on you for a while now."