The reason I'm writing this here is because Wattpad is my safety blanket. I usually don't write stuff about my problems and reach out to people about it but this time is different.
Let's start shall we...
I crave freedom. Not just because we're all in quarantine. I'm fine with quarantine, I'm an introvert after all. A Social Introvert to be specific.
In the eyes of many I'm a good and responsible child but in her eyes I'm not enough.
My mom is the problem. Don't get me wrong my mom is great but she's way too strict. She's way to strict it's suffocating me. She wants me to be everything she wanted me to be. She'll force me to do stuff I don't want to do and if my mom doesn't like anything that I do she'll ban me from doing it.
The result of this is me hiding things to her and lying to her. I got so used to lying to her it's basically like breathing to me.
I get really uncomfortable every time she's around. When she's around I feel like I'm caged, I feel like someone is watching my every move and if I did something wrong I'll go to jail.
I obey my mom not because I respect her but because I fear her. I can't even count how many phones she broke because "I'm always using it".
The only time I felt freedom is when she's not around. That's why I can't wait to go to college because I'll finally be far far away from her.
Maybe this is the reason I don't care much about Mother's Day and prefer Father's Day instead.
Because...
My dad is a different story, he's laid back and is perfectly fine on what I do as long as things are in order and I do my best doing my chores. His lectures are totally different from my mom. His voice is calm and collected, he never shouts and gets his point across very quickly. While my mom is the exact opposite. My parents are Yin and Yang and I prefer how my dad disciplines me.
I'm not saying I hate my mom I just don't like the way she disciplines me, but I must admit sometimes I feel like I do hate her.
I'll be back with a new chapter soon...