I was sat on the grey sofa again, looking up at Xavier. My favourite part of him shifting was when he stripped beforehand; it was fascinating to watch him transform before my eyes, but it was more fascinating to look at his shirtless self.
He finished taking off his shirt and jogging bottoms, beginning to sprout black fur as his bones cracked and moved under his rippling skin. The sound of bones cracking made me feel slightly nauseous again, but I was too entranced by what was happening to pay too much attention to it.
It only took a few seconds for the whole process to finish- a wolf was now sat where Xavier had once stood. Kodiak was massive, his head probably coming up to my shoulders when we were both stood up. He was still cautious around me, fighting off his own excitement- it's sweet how considerate Kodiak is about how I feel.
I patted my legs, coaxing him towards me with a smile. Once he realised I wasn't freaked out like yesterday, he bounded towards me at full speed. My eyes went wide, not having expected that. As sweet as he is, having a large wolf run at you full speed is fucking terrifying.
He jumped on my lap, crushing me with his own weight. He was licking my face all over, making me cringe backwards. It was strange knowing that somewhere in there was Xavier and he was essentially bathing me in slobber- a thought that made me deeply uncomfortable. Kodiak stopped his greeting, ducking his head low and wagging his tail.
I got the message loud and clear, giving him head scratches. He's essentially just one big puppy; a husky dog on steroids. He laid down in my lap, which was cute, but suffocating. I laid back into the sofa, getting comfy as Kodiak desperately moved closer, laying his head on my chest and staring up at me.
"You're like one massive hot water bottle." I complimented, "This is cosy."
Kodiak's tail wagged, showing me that he understood my words. I absentmindedly stroked his fur, letting my thoughts wander. When I touched Kodiak I didn't feel tingles like I felt with Xavier, but I just felt so calm. Kodiak's wolfish grin was so comforting and everything felt so much simpler. It was a completely different feeling than what I felt towards Xavier, which was strange.
"You're a good boy." I praised, scratching under his chin, "I know you wanted to tell me, but you shouldn't be so hard on Xavier- he didn't mean to hurt me."
He whined, burying his snout in my hand and huffing hot air. I had never seen a wolf sulk before, but it was clear that it's what he was doing. I stopped scratching his head, fixing him with a pleading look. He barked, shoving his head back into my hand.
"Promise me you'll forgive him?" I bargained, my hand hovering over his head.
He barked, his tail wagging as he pushed his head once again. I took that as a promise, continuing to scratch his head. If Xavier was supposed to make me feel loved, then Kodiak was definitely supposed to make me feel protected and calm... It was working.
I closed my eyes, enjoying the weight of the heavy wolf on my chest. I wasn't tired, but it was great to have a moments peace. My mind had been working in overdrive since I'd gotten out of the hospital yesterday evenong- I just needed a moments peace.
Kodiak seemed to appreciate the moment's silence too, considering he was fast asleep when I opened my eyes again. I ran my hands through his fur, admiring just how soft and clean it was. I wonder if Kodiak takes baths? Do wolves care about personal hygiene?
I let my eyes flutter closed once again, just revelling in the silence. Don't get me wrong, I like Xavier a lot- I'm just trying to process everything. Having Kodiak with me helped a lot, it was easing my nerves about my future being set out in front of me without much input from me.
I think the most important thing for me is to get to know Xavier a bit more before I meet the pack. Knowing they wouldn't hate me for being a guy was comforting, at least. I wonder if my mum will care that I'm with a guy? She seemed pretty hostile towards Xavier, even before she knew anything about our relationship. To be fair to her, however, I was in hospital for suspected drug withdrawals at the time.
My sexuality and the problems I was having with it had never been something I had brought up with her, since I had crossed off any possibility of me being gay a long time ago and I wasn't comfortable talking about anything else. I thought I wasn't into anyone- until Xavier came along that is. Since he came onto the scene, my life had been changed unbelievably. I'd like to think it's for the better, but I couldn't be sure just yet. It certainly feels better right now, though.
After a half an hour nap, Kodiak stirred. He looked up at me, suddenly alert and licking my face excitedly. I smiled, scratching the spot under his chin since he seemed to enjoy that the most. He wagged his tail, leaning into my touch.
"Could I spend some time with Xavier now?" I asked, ruffling his fur.
He barked, climbing down from the sofa and shifting. It didn't take long for Xavier to replace him, stood in all of his glory. I knew to cover my eyes before he finished transforming, so I was saved from the embarrassment as Xavier scrambled to put his trousers back on to cover up.
"Sorry about that." He apologised, "I'm covered up now."
I removed my hands from my eyes, admiring his torso once again. Were all werewolves this hot? If so, that's really unfair on the rest of us. I literally couldn't drag my eyes away from Xavier, feeling lust build up inside me all of a sudden. I was left fighting the urge to go to bed with him yet again.
"Cam, I can smell that." His voice was husky, eyes dark.
"Smell what?" I furrowed my eyebrows, keeping my eyes trained on his face (even if it was hard to not look at his bare chest).
"Your lust." He tried rubbing his eyes, but the black wouldn't fade.
I blushed, fiddling with my fingers. He could smell that I wanted him? That really sucks for me...
"That's unfair." I muttered, "I can't tell when you are."
"I always am." He breathed, making me bite my lip.
We stared at each other, the sexual tension in the room so thick you could feel it. The feeling in my chest was practically screaming at me to just jump him- to let him whisk me away. I fought it, trying to breath normally. I didn't want to give in and just fuck for the sake of fucking.
"If we're doing this whole 'mate' thing, we're doing it properly. Don't get any ideas." I warned, "Could you not put on a shirt, though?"
"Like the view?" He smirked, adjusting the hem of his jogging bottoms with his thumbs.
"How could I not?" I murmured, letting my eyes flit down the front of his torso.
I would unashamedly run my tongue down that.
"We need to get out of this house before we do something we'll regret." Xavier's eyes were pitch black again, "It's all that I can smell."
"Stop pointing it out!" I exclaimed, my cheeks heating up with embarrassment.
I leapt off of the sofa, grabbing my bag and locking myself in the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror, splashing cold water on my face. I'm glad Xavier suggested a walk, because I was so close to caving into the feeling.
I changed clothes, slipping on some pants that actually fit me from my bag. Dumping Xavier's jogging bottoms into the washing basket, I decided to keep his hoodie on. It just smelt too good to take it off; it smells exactly like Xavier.
I emerged from the bathroom, seeing Xavier pacing back and forth in the kitchen. His eyes were still a little dark, making butterflies swarm my tummy. It's sweet how badly I effect him. His head snapped towards me, a goofy smile replacing his lust when he realised I had kept his hoodie on.
"Ready to go?" I held out my hand for him to take, looking forward to the tingly feeling.
As much as I loved how safe Kodiak made me feel, nothing beats the tingles that shot through my body whenever Xavier touched me. Xavier crossed the room, taking ahold of my hand softly. He squeezed it- his goofy smile still stretched right across his face- leading me out through the front door.
"Are you not going to lock up?" I frowned, noticing he simply pulled the door shut.
"Who's going to break into the Alpha's house?" He smirked, swinging out hands.
"I forgot I'm dating the big dog." I teased, making his head snap towards me.
"We're dating?" He teased, "I haven't even asked yet."
"You were going to ask?" My heart melted, butterflies in my tummy again.
"Of course. I promised you a date, after all." Xavier flirted, "You want this to happen naturally and I get that. I'm going to try my hardest to make you fall for me."
Biting my lip, I looked down at the floor to hide the smile that had stretched over my face. I was so worried about everything moving so fast, but Xavier was just perfect. He seemed to understand me better than I even understood myself- a date was exactly what I wanted. I wanted to be asked if I wanted to be with Xavier or not.
Of course the answer would be yes, but he didn't have to know that yet.
"Where are we going?" I asked, changing the subject to still the butterflies in my tummy.
"You said you wanted to see the pack house." He swung my hand, "It'll help you understand how things run here. When you see the chaos of the pack house, it'll make everything seem a little less intimidating."
We strolled through the woods, Xavier making sure I didn't fall as we stepped over wooden sticks and plants. He was gentle with me: gentlemanly. I couldn't help but wonder what he'd be like in bed. Would he be soft like that?
"Cameron!" Xavier groaned, "The point of the walk was to stop that."
I blushed, burying my face in his shoulder. I forgot that he could smell my fucking arousal. That's definitely the only downside to all of this so far. I couldn't have dirty thoughts in peace anymore- they'd all be broadcasted to Xavier's bloody nostrils.
"Sorry." I sighed, "I'll stop."
"Don't apologise, it's just hard to not think of you..." He trailed off, clearing his throat to regain his train of thought, "Anyway, that's the pack house."
I looked to where he was pointing, my jaw dropping open. A large Victorian mansion sat in front of me, towering high above everything. With its backdrop against the woods, normally it would seem quite creepy, but the constant hustle of people through the building made it welcoming.
Even from a distance, you could tell that this place was chaotic. Kids were playing outside, climbing through ground floor windows and chasing each other about the garden. You could hear the bustle of people inside from here, voices yelling at each other and laughter echoing around the trees. The front door was propped open with a plant pot, which seemed very inviting.
Xavier was right about it soothing some of my nerves. This seemed like a fun and welcoming place; I had been imagining a cold and hostile environment because of my bad first impression of the elders. I couldn't have been more wrong.
"We should go before somebody spots me." Xavier smiled, "They'll only want to talk, but the questions can get pretty overwhelming. We'll come back when you're ready."
He took my hand, leading me away from the Victorian mansion. I was still in awe at how beautiful it was- it wasn't that old, but it's been preserved really well regardless. It's common for small towns in England to still have a lot of their original old buildings, but they're usually dotted around amongst modern buildings, so seeing it by itself in the woods was quite magical.
"You should see the inside- the staircase is beautiful. The top floor is my study; I'll have to take you there- it's incredible. The books in there have been handed down from Alpha to Alpha through countless generations." Xavier gushed, swinging my hand.
"I can't wait." I replied honestly, looking forward to it.