"Holy shit, this place is crazy, man! So your dad owns this? Y'all never use it?"
"For vacations, I guess." He watched, shuffling behind as Alec ran from room to room of the house. All he could hear was mutters and cusses and the squeaking of sneakers.
"Hey, hey..alec-" Christian grabbed his arms, pulling him away from the jacuzzi he'd spotted tucked away under the gazebo. He pointed, mouth wide.
"Yeah, I see it. Look, you wanna get food or not?"
"Damn, you would be so much hotter if you let me live here bruh. You know that right?"
"Come on." Alec grinned, gripping his chin before jogging off.
"I call shotgun."
Christian watched, trying to get into the mood. Who that man was, what they were. It wasn't any of his business. And what's going on at home; as much as it sucked, that wasn't any of his business either.
"Dude, come here a sec!"
"What?"
He trotted up the stairs 2 at a time. He slowed at his bedroom where the kids jacket was thrown. Christian grumbled, draping it over his shoulder as he entered.
"Dude." Alec chuckled, pointing to the couple posters lining the walls. "Borderline pornography, I like it."
Alec stared, smirking. He gestured to it for any explanation. Christian just shrugged.
Growing up he figured if his dad saw it, he'd leave him alone. Catch on to..man, who knows. His dad didn't bother him much on vacations though which was the main reason he enjoyed them so much.
Some nights he tried to get off to the women in the posters but he never felt anything. He had the phone, he knew he could do the same with a guy but it scared him so he didn't.
Moral of the story, nearly 17 with still zero fucking clue.
"So. This what your into then?"
"Maybe." Alec looked his way, smiling a little. He stepped up slow, taking his jacket from Christians shoulder. He stared as the lanky hands grazed slowly down his shirt.
"Maybe." Alec mocked deeply, tsking. Lips grazed Christians softly. He ignored the confused look as he drew back.
"You alright?"
"Yeah. Just hungry."
"Mm. Sure I can't help?"
"..Alec."
He leaned forward pressing kisses to his lips. Christian stared at the arm around his shoulder.
"Come on. I'll make you something good."
Later that night they were sprawled out in the big living room on the couch, having stuffed themselves with some Mexican dish Alec made, he couldn't remember the name.
Alec had gone crazy with the big tv and lush grey sectional. Christian sat shirtless, munching on popcorn. Alec was screaming at the horror movie in annoyance, somehow finding a reason to shit talk each character. He sat in Christians bigger hoodie, digging into a tub of ice cream.
"You look good." Christian stated. Alec looked over. His eyes narrowed at the unexpected comment.
"That was hard for you, huh?"
"Yeah." Christian nodded immediately. Alec chuckled, nudging him.
"Ay, my turn."
"Huh?"
Alec reached forward, not having released his spoon. He felt down Christians abs with the smooth back of his hand.
"That. I like that."
Alec pulled back. Christian swatted his hand when it came around again. He pulled away before leaning his spoon towards him.
"No thanks."
"..it wasn't for you." Christian looked down at the sudden coldness on his pecs. Alec was trying not to grin.
"You gonna get that?" He shook his head. Alec met his eyes slow, soft curls and sharp jaw peeking from the hood.
"Can I?"
He met his eyes, realizing then. Alec was asking. He bit his tongue, feeling the bulge in his pants. "Yeah."
His fists clenched at the tongue that ran over him, across his nipple and up to the nape of his neck. The guy was there nipping at him just as he'd done before.
Christian grabbed him beneath the blankets. Alec moaned at the feel of his firm hand gripping his thigh. Their mouths met, Alec slid his hand slowly down his chest.
"I don't wanna fuck up again."
"You won't." Christian muttered. He pulled away, leaning for a nearby drawer he'd stocked. Just incase. That's what people did, right?
"You sure? I know, I know, it's hard to tell but I actually prefer to bottom."
Alec shrugged. Christian just gave him a look, making him grin.
"I've never done this." Christian stated, handing over the supplies. He brushed at his face, trying his damndest not to look as pathetic as he felt. "With a guy. You might have to show me."
He'd never done it for pleasure is what he's meant. He'd had plenty of experience but none that would help him now.
He wanted Alec. That scared him. His heart pounded in his chest at the thought despite how turned on he was. And he had 17 years of pent up energy so that definitely wasn't what was holding him back.
Fucking Richard.
"Hey..your positive? Cause I'm like..on the verge of jumping you right now? And we're definitely fucking in that hot tub too."
"Jacuzzi, you mean."
"Bro just get on me already." Alec deadpanned. Christian grinned, pulling him close.
— — —
He swung the door shut behind him, the paintings practically shaking on the walls. He could feel his father calling out from the living room but ignored it.
Surprise, surprise he couldn't go through with it.
The weekend with Alec was sunshine and fucking rainbows until they tried to have sex. Christian chickened out. And how he wished that had been it.
They spent the rest of the weekend there. Alec tried to pretend like he wasn't annoyed but Christian wasnt a fucking idiot. So they spent all day just tiptoeing around eachother. It was rediculous.
Christian didn't usually take the fall for shit he didn't do. He wanted to say he understood, that it was his fault for saying he was sure when clearly he wasn't. But..if Alec only knew. He had every reason to not want to. Right? Or he was fucking crazy?
Well he guessed it didn't matter anymore. First day back at school since, Alec avoided him like the plague. He tried to talk to him at their lockers but he was gone before he could get a word out. So he guessed the message was pretty clear, wasn't it. It was about the sex.
Since day one it had been about laying it on thick, getting in his pants. And now that Alec knew he didn't have a shot, he was onto his next straight boy. Or school slut. Whatever caught his eye.
He stormed into the kitchen, grabbing at some beers. He tapped them against the edge of the counter causing the caps to pop off.
There Christian was like a damn dog, begging for the guys attention. So the last week, it'd just been him doing whatever the fuck he wanted because people didn't matter.
He didn't say shit in class and always snapped at the teachers when they forced him to speak up. He carried his bag everywhere so he didn't have to see the dude and didn't even bother going to PE.
He never looked at Alec, never tried talking to him. The guy wasn't even on his radar, he made sure of it.
"Hey kid." Richard was on the couch, his feet kicked up. He patted the seat next to him. Christian knew enough by now to take the invitation. He passed over a beer, collapsing down an appropriate yet unsuspecting distance away.
"Mm, thanks." He stated, eyeing the news. Christian took a breath at the sudden fingers running absently through his hair.
"You alright? You look angry."
"I'm fine." He grunted. Richard looked over at his tone. He backpedaled despite his anger. "Just a shit day. Look, can I go do homework or something?" He groaned, slouching back and crossing his arms over his chest.
"What? Spending time with your dad not fun enough for you?" Richard laughed. Christian rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, pretty much."
"Heh. You're exactly like your mom, you know." He mumbled, surprisingly somber. "Tough as shit."
Christian nodded, relaxing a little. He could feel his mouth quirk at all the memories. "She was pretty badass. I miss her."
"Me too, kid."
Christian felt his eyes start to swell at the reminder.
His eyes slid shut at the grip on his neck, soft and comforting.
Once he was able to think straight, he stood. The man had a way of getting in his head. Making it seem like he cared, that he loved him.
There was only one thing he loved and Christian needed to remember that. He couldn't keep getting dragged in like that.
Monsters like that didn't change.
Monsters like that always come back. Always.
"I have a lot I need to get done so can I go or what?" His fathers eyebrows raised in surprise.
"Christian, we were actually in the middle of a conversation. Sit down, man."
"I'm not feeling well, I'm just gonna g-
"Christian, enough. I'm not asking anymore. Sit."
Christian scoffed, dropping his bear to the table with a clink. "I said I don't want to fucking sit. I just want to go to bed, so let me-"
"Do not raise your voice at me, kid! Im the adult here. Am I not?"
"You seriously wanna play the parent shit? Right now? When the fuck have you been a parent, huh? Last night when you forced me to go down on you? Were you the parent then?" Christian stared numbly, not shying away from Richards now furious gaze.
"Or was that when I was 8? Crawling into my bed, teaching me about what it meant to be a man. What about then?"
"That's enough Christian!"
"No, I'm not your fucking puppet dad! And I'm sure as hell not your wife! No matter how much you try to pretend." Richard stepped forward, shaking with rage. His finger raised to Christians face, his other jerking up to grip his chin.
"You leave her..out of this." Christian glared, fighting the flood in his eyes as his father cried.
"I lost her, too. I lost my mom. But what you did...
what kind of dad does that, man?" Christian sniffed, struggling to keep the sob in. Richard grimaced, shaking his head. His chin shook and it was the first time Christian had ever seen the man close to breaking.
"You..you don't understand, Chri-" He began to plead. Christian broke out of his grasp, brushing at his face harshly as he left.
He tried to clean himself up as he headed for the front door. He knew if he stayed in that house for one more second, he would just lose his shit. Or his father would and that usually ended with a lot more bruises.
He reached for the door but noticed it was already opened. He cussed, taking in the figure squatting on the steps, feet tapping in nerves.
"What the-" Christian shut the door and grabbed Alec's wrist, dragging him far away from the house. He didn't stop until they're ere half way down the block.
"Christian, I'm so-
"What the fuck are you doing here?" Alec stared, mouth gaping for words. His eyes kept shooting back to the house then to Christian, looking him over.
"Uh..I was a dick. I was going to apologize, the door was just open-..Christian, man. What.."
His eyes didn't leave the cement, jaw flexing. To think, he actually thought he couldn't get more sad then he already was. Here stood his..whatever Alec was. Seeing him for the first time. What he truly was.
Used, broken, waste.
Alec tried to touch him, probably thinking he needed to be comforted. He twisted away with a scowl.
"Listen to me. You shouldn't be here, Alec. If he finds you...just go."
"..are you safe?"
"Does it fucking matter?!" He almost laughed at the ridiculous question. He shook his head, pulling at his hair as his eyes began to sting again. "Just go Alec I'm telling you, get the fuck out of here!"
"No, are you freakin crazy?" Alec scoffed. He released a shuttered breath, reaching up to put a firm grip on his shoulders.
"Please..look, this ain't got nothing to do with me. We don't owe each other shit, I know but please. I don't want to leave you here."
Christian shook. He took a squat there, right in the middle of the perfectly manicured sidewalk as he cried into his hands.
"Christian, come on man. If he's..look, just come with me. I-..I can figure something out. Come on, gringo." Alec's voice shook. Christian tensed at the arms that wrapped him up.
He gave in, sinking into the embrace. The dude smelled like salsa and cheap cologne. It was so fucking good. Alec..Alec was so fucking good.
He shook his head, crying into the smaller boys neck. Alec continued to mutter, trying to sooth him with false promises. That he'd get him out, look after him. Get him some help, whatever.
Christian knew better than to believe it. It wasn't true, it wasn't possible. But he kept listening. Because even if he didn't believe it, Alec did.
"Come on, man. I've got you."
No he didn't. But Christian nodded anyway.