The next few days past quickly. I spent a lot of time was spent with Pat picking pictures for the wake and funeral. I've also been working on selling some things from my apartment in LA. I also bought myself an SUV so I don't have to rely on Thea driving me around everywhere. She also went back to work yesterday on her regular detail. Since I was spending most of my time with Pat I told her it was okay for her to go. There is still and officer posted out in front of my house if we needed anything.
Thea actually let me come into headquarters with her and I met with Chief Connley to thank him again for everything he has done for me. I also happened to have bought the department dinner that night as a show of thanks. Before I left I did tell him my plans to travel and about attending the wake and funeral. He told me that Thea would be pulled from her detail to accompany me to both the wake and funeral. Rory also told me that there will be officers at both the wake and funeral because of the expected turn out.
Lindsey called this morning and told me that Bobby made bail and I was disappointed. I wouldn't let it get to me though. He better enjoy the little free time he has left because it's not going to last long. Lindsey informed me of a few legal steps that need to take place before they get a trial date and once that happens she will let me know.
I'm still staying with Thea. When I get back from LA I'm thinking about going back to staying at my house. The news vans have started to clear out and that's made me really happy. I've had security cameras installed around my property along with hiring a tree cutting service to cut down the tree behind me house. As much as I love the tree it needs to go. If anybody has seen me climb it in the last couple of days it needs to be gone for my own peace of mind.
Yesterday was Eds wake. There were two sessions and I stayed at the funeral parlor all day with Pat and Nicholas. A lot of people came to see Ed and it made my heart happy that he was this loved during his life time. Ed was a school teacher who taught at Salem High School and everybody loved him. When word came out about his passing the high school actually closed school for the day even though he hasn't taught there in at least 10 years. The wake brought a lot of former students and teachers and I wouldn't be surprised to see how packed the church will be for the funeral later today.
True to his word, Thea was present by my side for throughout the wake. But because she was on duty Chief Connley made her dress in her formal blues. Actually all of the officers around the wake are all wearing their formal dress blues. Chief Connley actually came by the wake as well for a little to check up on everyone and how things were going. There was news coverage because of how well liked Ed was but none of them knew I was here.
Today is Eds funeral and I wasn't looking forward to it. After this Ed would be really gone and Pat will be alone. I'm also really not looking forward to singing. After talking with Pat he told me that they want me say some words during the funeral. Public speaking like this isn't something I'm great at and I still don't know what I'm going to say.
Right now I don't need to think about it. The only thing that has my attention is Thea. She is looking at herself in the mirror making sure her uniform is in order as I'm watching from the bed. I'm wearing a black skater dress with a pair of black converse. For the wake yesterday I dressed in a button up and slacks but today I went with the dress. This is the same dress I wore a year ago for my siblings funeral.
I shook that thought from my head quickly and focused back on Thea. She ran her hand over the front of her dress jacket to make sure you couldn't see her service weapon. Thea and I have been sharing a lot more looks of longing over the past couple of days. We have both caught each other staring and every night we end up cuddled together in bed. Neither of us said anything to the other about it though. We have been curving around our feelings.
Thea held her hand out for me to take and I accepted it and stood from the bed. The ride to the church was quiet. The radio was on in the background and in between songs the radio announcer brought up my case. I changed the station right away and Thea rested her hand on my thigh.
When we arrived at the church I could tell there would be standing room only once the service starts. Thea opened the passenger door for me and held out her arm for me to take. I gripped onto her arm tightly as she lead me into the church. We walked up the aisle arm in arm and took our seats in the pew with Pat. The priest came over to us before the service started and let me test the piano before I would play on later. I just ran through a few scales to make sure it sounded okay before sitting down in the pew next to Thea.
The service started not long after I took my seat. Thea had her hand on my thigh for the majority of it. When it wasn't there my leg started to shake and it annoyed her. I listen as the priest spoke and then Nicholas went up to the lectern to speak.
"I just wanted to thank everybody for coming out today to say a final goodbye to my dad. I know the weather isn't the nicest right now and it means a lot to our family to see all of this support. I also wanted to thank Ashlyn." Hearing my name I looked up and found Nicholas' eyes.
"Yes you. Most of you know I don't live up here anymore. I just wanted to thank Ashlyn for looking out for my parents. You're the sister I never had and they both love you ever so much. You are the daughter they never had. I'm so grateful that you moved in next door and have been looking out for them when I'm not around." Nicholas said and gave me a teary smile.
"My dad Edward, better known as Ed. He taught English at Salem High School for almost 40 years. I can see a lot of his old co-workers and former students are here today. Dad loved teaching. He loved waking up every day and going to work to teach the next generation about great works of literature. When he retired he would still end up going back and visiting Salem High like he still worked there. He shared his love of novels with anybody that he would come in contact with. Dad would always do the New York Times crossword puzzle every day and even completed the puzzle the day he passed.
"I would like to say thank you to him and Pat for adopting me and raising me into the man I am today. Dad would always be in my corner. He was always in the stands for my baseball games and helped me with my homework before he started grading his papers. I know that he is in a better place now and will always watch over myself and Dad and Ashlyn." Nicholas wrapped up his speech and took his seat next to Pat as the priest announced it was my turn.
Thea gave my hand a squeeze before I stood from the pew and walked over to the piano. I ran through some scales again before I unclipped the microphone from the stand and looked at the audience.
"I'm going to try and keep this short but I was asked to play Eds favorite song. Most of you who knew Ed knows how much he loved Frank Sinatra. Most days that I would go next door one of his records would be playing in the background. So this is My Way."
After I clipped the microphone back into place I took a deep to settle the butterflies in my stomach. It's been a long time since I've performed but it's just like riding a bike. I pressed down on the keys and let my voice out. My voice filled the church as I belted out the song. I just focused my eyes on the keys and I sang the lyrics from my heart.
When I finished the song I looked up from the piano and found Thea in tears. She gave me a shaky smile and I wiped away the few tears from my checks before I took the microphone again.
"I was also asked to say a few words but I'm going to keep it short because there is another song I would like to sing. When my family moved into the house next door they come over the first night we moved in and brought us dinner. After what happened with my family, Pat and Ed were the one constant thing in my life. Their door was always open no matter the time and when it wasn't, they gave me a key to use, even though I lost it a few times." I said thinking back to all the times I've told them I couldn't find it.
"A few, I lost count after 10 Ashlyn" Pat said from his seat in the front row. I chuckled and so did most of the church.
"When the movie A Star is Born came out we rented it one night and watched it together. Ed was enamored with the movie and made me watched it with him a few more times even though we both broke down crying every single time at the ending. The night Ed passed away was the worst night of my life. Other things happened that night and then I came home and saw what happened and I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it. Most of the lyrics in this song were so true to my feelings that night and in general towards Pat and Ed. I just wish I got to say goodbye to him. This song is I'll Never Love Again." I said and clipped the microphone into the stand.
I took a sip from the water bottle that was under the piano before I settled my hands over the keys again. I took a deep breath and willed myself to make it through this song. I let myself feel all of my emotions as I belted it out. My fingers missed some keys towards the end of the song because I couldn't see any more with the tears pooling in my eyes. They fell as I finished off the song and let out a sob. Only one though, I was able to pull it together to get off the alter and take my seat next to Thea.
Thea took my hand once I sat down and squeezed it, hard. I took a few hard deep breaths and calmed myself down as the priest closed the funeral mass and people started to leave. A few people came up to Pat and gave him condolences before leaving. Thea kept watch and silently walked over to Chief Connley while I stood near Eds casket.
I placed my hand on the cover and looked over towards the alter again. Standing at the head of the casket is Ed. He is wearing the suit he is going to be buried in and has a bright smile on his face.
"You did Frank justice up there you know." Ed said and walked closer to me.
"I just wanted to do you justice." I said trying to keep my tears at bay.
"You did more than that Ashlyn. I'm happy to see you on this side of the vail. You need to watch over Pat for me. He is going to need someone to talk to about his army days and go to brunch with." Ed said and stopped just in front of me.
"I know. I'm moving home permanently. I just need to tie up some loose ends and then I'll be around more." I said and gave him a smile.
"That's what I want to hear. Also, just some advice from someone who waited a little too long to go after what I wanted, don't wait. Officer Ramsey over there has been giving you googly eyes all service long. It's the same look I gave to Pat before I grew the nerve to ask him out." Ed said and smiled over at his husband.
I followed his line of sight and saw Thea looking right at me. When I turned around Ed has a knowing smile on his face.
"I need to go now but I'll pop up every once in a while to check on you." Ed said and gave me a wink. I just nodded as a tear slipped from my eye. When I closed my eyes and took a deep breath and opened them again Ed was gone. I looked down at his casket and pressed my hand to it and leaned down to kiss it.
When I stood up straight Thea was by my side holding her arm out. I wrapped my arm around hers and she led me out of the church. The few news stations waiting around caught us as Thea walked us to her car. We are going back to Pats house for a late lunch.
Lunch was simply bagels and various salads. Only under Thea's watchful eyes did I eat. I wasn't really hungry but I knew I needed to eat something before my flight. After I finished Thea and I said good night to Pat and Nicholas before heading back to Thea's house.
The house was quiet as I slipped out of my dress and laid on her bed. I watched as Thea slowly took off her uniform piece by piece. When she was down to her sports bra and her boy shorts Thea looked over to me. She gulped when she realized I was only in my bra and underwear. She didn't say anything as she came over to the bed and laid down next to me. I craved her body heat so I rolled over and put my head on her chest. My free hand placed on all of this open skin I've never seen before.
"When is your flight?" Thea asked quietly.
"I need to be at the airport by 11pm." I answered and looked at the clock. It's only a little after 5 now.
"I wish you didn't have to go." Thea whispered. If I wasn't paying attention I would have missed it.
"I'm only going to be gone for two days and you're working for both of them. They are going to fly by." I said trying to not think about the hole in my chest thinking about being away from Thea.
"And I'm picking you up from the airport." Thea said and ran a hand through my hair.
"You better." I said and heard Thea chuckle.
We ended up taking a nap as the events of the day caught up with us. When we woke up both of us were cold and threw on sweatshirts. I ended up taking one of Thea's Salem police department sweatshirts for my time away. I'm only taking my backpack and small carry-on with me that didn't have much in it.
Once I had everything together Thea put my bags in her car and we were on our way to the airport. The ride was quick because of the late hour and before I knew it Thea was pulling up outside the terminal. She didn't say anything as she held out my brothers Boston Red Sox hat for me.
"You left it on the bed. I thought you might want it." Thea said as I took the hat from her hands.
"Thank you." I said and put it on my head.
"Call me if you need anything okay?" Thea said as a wave of emotion washed through her eyes.
"You'll be the first person I call." I said and gave her a nod.
Thea leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I smiled at her and hopped out of the truck. Thea met me in the back and helped me get my luggage out of the truck before I pulled her into a tight hug. It took a lot more while power then I care to admit to pull away from Thea. I couldn't look as I grabbed my bags because I knew if I did I wouldn't be able to leave Salem.
So I took grabbed my luggage and made my way into the terminal so I wouldn't miss my flight. Two days without Thea around shouldn't be bad right?
Song on the side is I'll Never Love Again by Lady Gaga.