WARNING: A LITTLE TINY BIT OF SMUT
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Phil's POV
"I'll see you around." Oliver told us after hugging us one after the other. "Hopefully your physical condition will stay the way it is and won't get any worse." He addressed Dan before walking through the front door.
He just nodded and tried to pretend that he wasn't terribly afraid that the pain would return fully. Because they could do that at any time and they would probably do it too often in the next few days and weeks.
"I'll see you." I said, and braced myself on the door frame. He smiled at us again before turning and walking down the stairs.
The door closed behind Oliver and not a second later I turned to Dan, who was just standing there and I was looking uncertain. I bridged the small distance between us and so maneuvered him against the wall behind him.
He looked at me in surprise, but didn't do anything against it, when I kissed him stormily, to which he responded in surprise at first, but then he returned the kiss that made everything explode in me as always.
"I love you more than anything." I started to, perhaps, regain the piece of trust that day had cost him with my expressions of love. I kissed him again, but stopped short so that I could speak to him. "We will sort it out. Everything will be fine."
My hands felt for the button on his pants to open it, but he held them, which involuntarily stopped me.
"What did I do to earn that now?" He asked breathlessly. He just knew me too well not to notice that I was doing this for a reason.
"Just because. I will be able to tell my boyfriend how I feel for him, right?" I replied on his neck, which I meanwhile caressed with my lips again.
He tilted his head slightly to the side, which showed me that he was getting involved. His breathing accelerated barely noticeably, but I noticed anyway, which is why I grabbed him by the left and right of his sweatshirt shortly afterwards and pulled him backwards into the bedroom with me. Still astonished, he just came to me, whereupon I gently pushed him onto the bed and immediately went after him again.
"Phil, stop it." he managed.
"What is it? Don't you want to?" I asked gently, somewhat unsettled. I mean, I remember very well what his past was.
"Of course I want to, but something is wrong with you."
"Everything is fine. What's wrong about making out?" I groaned because I was beginning to realize that I couldn't avoid telling him the truth. Dan rolled his eyes and pushed me further away.
"How am I supposed to trust you if you never tell me what's going on with you?" He said annoyed and sat up, whereupon I went off and leaned against the wall, whereupon he immediately sat up and put his hand on my forearm.
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you. Maybe I just imagined it." He apologized as I rubbed my eyes and resigned myself to the fact that I was wrong again, although I so badly wanted to do everything right to prevent exactly what he had just accused me of.
"No, you're right." I said, and no matter how long I rubbed my eyes, the tears in it were still adamant.
"I'm so scared that after today you think I would leave you alone. Believe me, if I could I wouldn't spend a day without you. Please, you just have to believe me. You know I didn't want to betray you, right?" It suddenly burst out of me like a waterfall. "I don't know what to do to show you. Somehow it just seems to get worse and worse-"
"Phil, hey, no." He interrupted me before I could go on. "I didn't know it was so difficult for you. I know that you only mean well with me. Sometimes I just have to convince myself that you won't leave me because it's so hard for me to believe that. In general, I just can't believe that someone takes so much to be with me. As stupid as it sounds."
I raised my eyes and looked at him.
"Why shouldn't I do that?" I asked without understanding, whereupon he forced a weak smile.
"No idea. Because I'm a junkie who does nothing but make life difficult for you?"
"That's not true, Dan. Of course it's not always easy, but it's not your fault alone. For me, you are more than worth it, no matter how difficult it is or will be." I let him know and Dan's eyes widened at my words and filled with so much love and gratitude that my heart could have exploded right away.
I snuggled up to him and he slid down a bit so that I could put my head on his chest, like we did when we used to fall asleep next to each other. He covered us and my hand reached for his over the covers and played with his fingers until I put my palm against his.
"This is exactly one reason why I didn't want to go to the clinic. I can't fall asleep next to you in the evening." he mentioned. "The nights are the worst. I wouldn't be able to do it without you." He said and gently grabbed my wrist to pull me closer a little.
"And I couldn't do some other stuff."
"I'm here." I grinned and could immediately read in his eyes what he actually wanted to tell me with his previous statement.
My hand went under the covers, opened his pants and shortly after I was on top of him to slide down his body and take off his pants.
On my way back up, I paused at the center of his body, kissed and massaged him through his boxer shorts until he showed the desired response.
I came all the way back to him and let my tongue enter his mouth again while he was also fumbling with the button on my jeans.
"Will we finish this time?" I asked seductively after he pulled my shirt over my head and united our lips instantly again.
"Yeah." he replied hoarsely and I felt his fingers everywhere. I didn't know where it came from, but suddenly there was an uncanny excitement that made my body cry out for satisfaction. I wanted to feel him, wanted us to show our love in this way, which we could probably never express in words.
Gradually we undressed completely and now lay facing each other, naked and kissing us wildly and his hand wandered down my body, over my ribs, my hip bones, backwards, where he clawed his fingers in my buttocks and me like that pushed closer to himself.
Our erections touched and we groaned almost simultaneously.
"Phil, come on." He said breathing heavily and he looked into my eyes, which were only a few centimeters in front of his.
I kissed him one last time before I tried to sit up, but you could tell how hard it was for him to tear away from my lips. It wasn't until he did it that I sat between his legs.
And soon afterwards we were reunited, which at least for this time, in which we let our emotions run free and we gave ourselves to each other, gave me the security that I subconsciously needed even more than Dan himself.
Dan's POV
After our last moan filled the room, Phil lay down on my side next to me and pulled me into his arms so that his still hot body was close to mine. He hugged me and I put his cheek to his chest. I didn't want to waste a second of the precious time we could be so close.
"Your heart beats so quickly." I still mentioned a little out of breath.
"Because of you." he replied, pressing a kiss on my hairline.
"How do you feel?" He suddenly asked much more seriously, which is why I didn't know what he meant before I realized that he was referring to my withdrawal symptoms.
"Quite well at the moment. I just can't concentrate on the pain, so let's talk about something else."
As soon as he had addressed it, I felt the tension in my nerves, the tension in my muscles as if I had been doing extreme sports, the aching bones. The heat that kept turning into icy cold at lightning speed.
Earlier, when Oliver was still there, I was afraid that I might pass out, but since then things have been going uphill and if Phil and I could distract ourselves further with sleeping or at least some other topic, it would certainly stay that way for the time being .
"I didn't mean to hurt you today." He said suddenly, running through my hair over and over again.
"I know."
"It's just- I held you for hours last night when you screamed and whimpered in pain and almost went nuts. I didn't know how bad it was. I was afraid, Dan. That's why I called Oliver."
I turned so I could look at Phil, who also turned his gaze to me.
"I'm scared too." I said honestly, hoping that I hadn't said anything wrong. Phil leaned down and kissed my forehead.
"We'll go through it."
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shorter chapter, but s a bit of cute shit. i am obsessed with cute stuff.
hope you liked it.
as always let me know what you think.
i love you guys.