Normally when you're pressed up against a wall by someone, you're trying to fight your way out of it. I don't think I could have pushed her off me if I tried. Her lips felt so wanting, and her breathing was erratic; I could hear it in between each time her lips met mine. I tried to put my arms around her but as soon as I lifted my hands she pinned them to the wall with her own, intertwining her fingers with mine in the process.
To the outside observer it may have looked like we hadn't seen each other in years, not just a few days which was the reality of it. We had even SEEN each other in those few days, we just had had no time together where we could do this. I thought mine - and everyone else' - reward was getting to wear our berets after we had gotten back from the ruck march. But right now, it kinda felt like THIS was my reward.
With the speed at which she was kissing me, it seemed like she was about to kiss the color off of my lips - whatever there was left. Of course, my lips had been dry and cold after marching back in the rain, but they warmed up real fast with all this attention.
I could have stayed pinned against this wall forever. I was trying to kiss her back, but it was hard to make it look like I was doing much of anything but taking the full brunt of her assault.
This must have been what the first guy (I know, ew) I ever went on a date with felt like when I had kissed him. Of course I'd forced myself to at the time - I thought that's what you were supposed to do when you went to the movies on a date. I had initiated it as he was watching the movie. He had both arm rests down (who even DOES that on a movie date) and his arms were planted firmly on each of them. I remember thinking to myself: 'what the hell are you doing, you don't even like him' as I closed my eyes to kiss him. And what did he do? He just stayed in the EXACT same position, merely turning his head towards me as I did the majority of the work. What a fucking douchebag. Foreshadowing though, I suppose, right?
Anyway that's how I felt at the moment. All I was able to do was make small attempts at gaining some kind of upper hand, which mostly amounted to me flicking her tongue with mine a few times halfheartedly. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, it all just stopped.
She was breathing heavily, and I felt the warmth of her breath below my mouth. I felt like sliding down the wall and onto the ground, as if I'd just been knocked out or something, but in the best way. She'd managed to steal all my remaining energy with her lips.
"I uh..." She brushed her lips with a finger as she spoke, "I'm sorry, Sel. I couldn't help myself."
I just smiled widely at her. "That's TOTALLY fine. Let me know if you ever feel like you can't help yourself again."
She chuckled and shrugged. "I told you to kiss me. You waited too long, what was I supposed to do?"
I scoffed. "I waited? I think you waited as long as it took to finish that phrase to launch onto me, but OKAY, Dev. Whatever you say..." I couldn't help but laugh.
She backed away from me and looked at the ground. "Unfortunately, I can't keep you in here all night. I'm feeling pretty weak to come up with some kind of reason I had you in here if someone asks. As it is, I'm pretty much banking on everyone being asleep when you leave out of here and not asking any questions."
I smirked. So this whole thing was basically improvised. DS Lovato. Devonne. Tactician and soldier. Except for right now.
I complained. "So I can't stay a little bit longer with you? C'mon, Dev... just like... fifteen minutes. You can't just... dominate me like you just did and then kick me out..."
She stared into my eyes for a second before her eyes traveled down my body and back up.
I felt like I might have made her reconsider, so I said nothing, instead allowing her to go through this process two or three times.
"Maybe we..." She started, but stopped herself. She snorted a laugh. "No, there's no way..." She pointed at me sternly. "You... YOU do this to me, Sel. Got me trying to figure out some way we could make it work when there is none right now. But I'll see you later today, okay? It's not like the field again."
I nodded and sighed. "I know... it just sucks that we can't spend more time together tonight. I really missed you."
Devonne folded her arms and raised her eyebrows. "And you think I didn't miss YOU?"
I laughed nervously, seeing her bow up to me like that. "No, I know you did it's just... ugh."
She pecked me on the lips quickly. "Scoot. I'll see you tomorro- err, later today."
"Okay..." I said, defeated.
I stood at the door, with my hand on the knob, and turned my head back towards her.
"Sweet dreams, Dev."
She smiled. "You too, baby."
I made to turn the knob and stopped. Baby?
"Wait, you can't just call me that for the first time and-"
She shook her head, still smiling. "Oops. It slipped."
I couldn't fight the smile that took over when I turned back around and left.
I was her baby...
-
As I feared, the next week went by way too fast. As all of our command had told us prior to the night of the NIC and the ruck march, we weren't really doing much except preparing to graduate. The days went by fast, and there was a lot of down time. We had our phones permanently now - something I swore to myself I'd never take advantage of again - so I texted Devonne a lot when we weren't doing anything. I tell you, if you saw her texts you'd never believe she was some kind of hard ass drill sergeant, the way she abused smiley faces and exclamation points.
She explained to me over time what had happened with the whole Heather situation. Heather's phone and computer had been confiscated by CID and all the data had been wiped, because Devonne had said she had reason to believe that military intelligence was compromised. It seemed to me that you'd need some kind of proof to warrant that happening and not just saying something, but I guess when you're a well respected staff sergeant/drill sergeant, CID takes you seriously. I guess we'd never really know if Heather had been telling the truth and actually had a picture of us, but I also guessed she learned her lesson by making threats. Have fun putting all your contacts and applications back on your stuff, bitch.
We had a class on how to set up our dress uniform one day, which was all the proper measurements of where our ribbons went on our jacket, as well as our name plate. DS Lovato brought her uniform in, and it looked somewhat similar to how I'd dreamt it did when we were in the field and I had that horrible nightmare. It was very impressive, and made all of ours look boring by comparison with our two ribbons and a medal for our rifle qualification. Of course, I was one of the few that had an 'expert' badge, and this was something I took great pride in.
As the days went by, and graduation drew closer, I began to realize I had been completely off in accusing Sanders of possibly telling someone about us. We had gotten away with it, and Sanders had kept her promise in not telling anyone. Unfortunately this also meant that we'd gotten away with it, in that we weren't gonna HAVE to get away with it much longer, since I'd be leaving at the end of the week.
Graduating. Moving on. Starting my career in the Army. I'd made it. I kept reminding myself of that throughout the day, and it was something I was reminded of automatically at night when I'd see my dress uniform hanging up in my locker.
Before I knew it, it was Family Day - the fabled day we'd be allowed to actually leave the base we'd been confined to for the last two months for most of the day. But not before some ceremonies, in typical military fashion.
All the parents and loved ones sat in some bleachers out in a small field area near the barracks as we marched up there. They all started cheering as we got closer, and I was briefly reminded of how MY parents wouldn't be here. I'm not sure I minded, really. They never believed I had what it took to make it, so it was kinda fitting they weren't here pretending they had all along. Plus, all I had to do was look to the side of our marching formation at DS Lovato to feel good. SHE believed in me from the start. She loved me. I loved her.
I also saw Sanders out of the corner of my eye (you can't actually turn your head to look anywhere while you're marching, you have to look straight forward) and was reminded of what a great friend I'd made in her. I'd miss her too, of course, for an entirely different reason than I'd miss Devonne. We'd most definitely bonded in a huge way in our time here. I thought back to the first day of the cycle when I'd fucked up and made her do pushups, and how I'd figured from that point on she'd hate me. It's funny how things work out, isn't it?
There was one thing I was looking forward to about this ceremony, and it was something that only four other people among our ranks had in common with me.
There was a small group of people selected to put on a drill and ceremony display for the parents - those being the people who carried rifles and made deliberate movements marching around that you've probably seen before in movies or maybe even in real life somewhere at some point.
Once that was over, it was my time to shine, along with Sanders and a few others.
"Promotees, post!" DS Lovato called out.
We were in the back of the formation specifically for this reason, so that when we left it it wouldn't be that noticeable to the people watching. Sanders was in the third position in our column, while I was behind her, and three others that I didn't recognize too well from other platoon were also in the line.
She called out the directions to us: 'Right face. Forward, march. Column left, march. Left flank, march' until we were behind DS Lovato, with our backs facing the crowd.
We did a left face, so that now we faced the formation in front of us, though more importantly I could look at DS Lovato's backside for a few moments.
I had my new rank patch underneath the left side of my jacket collar. This was so DS Lovato could easily grab it and replace my current rank in the promotion ritual.
"Attention to orders!" She called out. Everyone snapped to attention in the formation. She read off the promotion orders for the first two people and then Sanders, before she got to me.
"The Secretary of the Army has imposed special trust and confidence in the patriotism, valor, fidelity, and professional excellence of Russo, Selena. In view of these qualities and her demonstrated leadership potential, she is therefore promoted from the rank of private second class, to private first class, effective on this date."
They made it sound so grandiose, it gave me a renewed sense of greater pride. I saw all the people in the formation in front of me - those who did not get selected. I did wonder though, if it were a different drill sergeant and I'd performed the same if I'd still be getting promoted.
I always had a bad habit of doing this. I was unable to just accept something good happened, I always had to look at the 'what if' situation.
Once she had finished reading the orders for the last person, she turned around to face us, and one by one went up to us and put our new rank on our uniform, followed by a congratulations and a handshake.
I admired her bearing when she got to me. She was most definitely on the spot right now, in front of hundreds of parents and the formation. If she showed any favoritism at all, someone would see it. She didn't. She merely shook my hand, smiled, and said, "Congratulations, Selena. You earned it."
She widened her eyes and did a quick eyebrow raise after she said this, looking like she said something wrong. It was only for a brief moment, and I was probably the only person that saw it, but I definitely did.
It wasn't until she congratulated the last person that I realized why. She hadn't addressed me as 'Russo' or by my last name like she had everyone else. She had called me 'Selena'. Luckily, everyone standing in this small line - besides maybe Sanders - was probably too preoccupied with looking straight ahead and looking professional to really give a shit what DS Lovato said to anyone besides themselves. I could only hope that was the case, anyway.
We marched back into the formation, and there were a few speeches mainly catered to the families to let them know what we'd accomplished throughout our training, and then we marched back to the barracks. We were supposed to change into our dress uniforms to go out for family day.
DS Lovato called me into her office again. This would have started to look really suspicious at this point, but luckily everyone was so preoccupied being excited about seeing their families and getting to leave the base for the day no one seemed to notice.
She smiled when I entered.
"So, who is here for you today? I bet your family is really proud of you!"
It dawned on me as she said this that we'd never discussed my home life, or lack thereof. Not to say I had a hard life or anything, but as I've said I didn't have the greatest relationship with my parents.
"Yeah... I'm sure they are. Wherever they are." I said, plainly.
Her smile faded. "They... aren't here?"
She had been sitting down, but she got up and walked over to me. "Oh no..."
"It's okay, Dev. I knew they wouldn't come. It doesn't bother me, honestly."
She placed her hands on my arms. "What kind of parent doesn't come to see their kid graduate from basic training? Did they come to your graduation from high school?"
I nodded. "Of course. They've just never been really keen to the idea of me joining the military ever since I said I was going to. This is their way of showing me that, I suppose."
Devonne looked like she was going to cry.
"No, no... don't cry, please. It's okay. Really." I smiled. "You're here. That's what matters to me."
She let go of my arms and went back to her desk, leaning over on it.
"I have half a mind to call your parents right now..."
I walked over to her and put my arms around her stomach, hugging her from the back. "No, don't do that."
"It just... really sucks. More so because all I want to do is take you out today and show you how proud I am of you. It's pride you deserve. But... I can't. We'd be spotted in an instant." She sighed.
I rubbed her stomach a little. "I know how proud you are of me, Dev. Today is already worth it to me because of that."
She spun around and kissed me, cupping her hands around my face. "So who are you gonna go with? If you don't have anyone I can talk to the commander and see if I would be allowed to take you out to lunch or something at least... Everyone deserves to celebrate today. Just because your parents are dicks doesn't mean you shouldn't get to as well..."
"I don't know. But don't talk to the commander... wouldn't that be suspicious? I'll figure something out..."
She pointed a finger at me. "I'm not gonna let you stay here all day, so you better figure something out or I'm taking you out."
"Seriously, it's not that big of a deal-"
"Go get Sanders and tell her to come in here." She cut me off.
"Oh...kay...?"
I walked out and retrieved Sanders, who was sitting on the side of her bunk, polishing the brass on her dress uniform.
"You wanted to see me, drill sergeant?" Sanders asked from the doorway. I was behind her.
"Yes, Sanders. Please come in, there's something I'd like to ask you." Devonne said.
Soon we were all three in her office. Sanders and I stood at parade rest. Devonne didn't know Sanders knew, so I couldn't be lax around her to play the part.
"Relax guys, this is an informal thing." Devonne started. "Sanders, what I wanted to ask you was who you were going out with today?"
"My grandparents, drill sergeant. They are downstairs on the drill pad, waiting for me." Sanders explained.
"Ah, that's nice, I'm glad to hear that. Now... I can't really say this as an order, just a friendly suggestion... but Russo here doesn't have anyone to go out with for family day..." She trailed off.
Sanders looked at me, stunned. "Russo, I thought... you said your boyfriend was coming?"
"Well uh, yeah. But it turns out he couldn't make it..." I quickly improvised.
Devonne clasped her hands together. "Would it be too much of a problem if Russo went with you today, Sanders? Do you think your grandparents would mind? No one should have to spend Family Day alone, y'know?"
"No, I know they'd be cool with it, drill sergeant. I don't even have to ask. Of course she can come with me... she's one of my best friends now, it'd be fun." Sanders smiled, looking at me.
Devonne smiled too. "Thank you, Sanders, you're a great battle buddy." She turned to me. "You have a...friend that lives around here don't you? Maybe she could drop you off there sometime this afternoon?"
I don't know how I picked up on what she was saying so quickly, but I did. I narrowed my eyes at her slightly, and she nodded, ever so subtle. I took that to mean I was right. She wanted Sanders to drop me off at HER house.
Sneaky, sneaky Devonne...
"Oh yeah, I almost... forgot that." I played along as well as I could.
The funny part about all of this was I could easily just say right now that Sanders knew and we didn't have to play these games. But this was almost more fun.
"Okay, Sanders. I sure would appreciate it if you made sure Russo had someone to spend the day with, that'd be really nice of you."
"No problem, drill sergeant."
"Dismissed, Sanders."
Once Sanders had left the room, Devonne said, "I'll text you the address. She can drop you off, and I can give you a ride back. I am obligated to give my soldiers rides back on post if there are some complications with their family or something."
I grinned. "You're so slick..."
She shrugged. "Like I told you before. I'm a drill sergeant. I'm good at getting what I want."
-
"I can't believe this..." Sanders said to me, when we were both in the backseat of her grandparents' car. We were currently on the way to the address Devonne had texted me.
"I can't either, to be honest..."
"Like, she SPECIFICALLY asked me to take you so I could drop you off at her house... she must REALLY want to see you..."
"Except she doesn't know that you know about us. So to her you're just dropping me off at a 'friend's house' that lives nearby." I pointed out.
Sanders grinned. "I don't know why, but I'm excited FOR you. Like, right now this is cooler than the fact my grandparents are here. When I knew I was going to basic, I never imagined I'd become best friends with the girl that ended up DATING our drill sergeant. Like who would ever think that would happen?!"
"What was that, Jaclyn?" Sanders' grandma asked from the passenger seat. Her grandpa was driving.
You know it's funny to hear someone you've only known by last name for over two months get called their first name. I remembered seeing Sanders' full name on sign in rosters for training and stuff, but it'd never really been important.
"Yeah, JACLYN..." I emphasized her first name and giggled.
She punched me in the arm. "Nothing, grandma. I just said I never imagined I'd become best friends with the girl that ended up HATING our drill sergeant."
Her grandma laughed. "Oh dear. I can only imagine what you girls went through. But I am proud of both of you."
"Thanks grandma..." Sanders droned.
Sanders opened her mouth to laugh at how close that had been. I was having trouble not laughing too. It was a nice save though, I had to admit.
"Okay, so this is it?" Her grandpa asked, pulling up to a mailbox.
It was surreal to see Devonne's actual home. We all kinda thought she lived at the company in the barracks from how much she'd been there over the cycle.
It was a very simple house, and it certainly didn't look impressive. There was one garage, a small porch with steps leading up to it, and a bench on the porch. The house was rather small.
"Yes, this is it!" I affirmed, verifying the text and the address on my phone. "Thank you so much for dropping me off, and taking me out with you today. I really appreciate it." I smiled.
I texted Devonne: I'm here, to which she shortly replied with a smiley face and that the door was unlocked so she didn't have to answer it.
"No problem, dear. It was a pleasure to meet one of Jaclyn's friends. We will see you at the graduation tomorrow then, yes?" Her grandma asked.
"Of course." I said. I hugged Sanders, and she whispered "You better tell me everything when you get back" into my ear as we hugged. I nodded quickly at her.
"Have a good day, dear." They said finally as I got out of the car. I wished them the same and closed the door. Sanders gave me a thumbs up with a big smile as they drove off.
I processed what was about to happen. For the first time, we wouldn't have to worry about the commander or anyone barging in and 'catching' us. We would be completely and totally free for a few hours. It was almost as if this was what we'd worked for this whole time.
I walked up the steps slowly and knocked on the door, before turning the doorknob. It was unlocked, just as she said it would be. It felt strange to be walking into a house I never had before, so I closed the door behind me and stood there. I didn't see her, so I called out, "Dev?"
"I'll be right there! Make yourself at home, there's a pizza on the coffee table in front of the couch. Wasn't sure if you'd ate with Sanders or not, but help yourself if you're still hungry!" She called from what sounded like the back room.
"Oh, and there's a coat hanger right there on the left, you should put your uniform jacket up there so it doesn't get wrinkled!" She added.
I put it up as instructed and sat down on the couch. I felt very overdressed wearing this white dress shirt and blue pants with black dress shoes on. I kicked them off, revealing the black dress socks underneath. This uniform wouldn't win any awards for being comfortable to lounge in, that's for sure.
I surveyed the living room while I waited for her, anxiously. You'd have never guessed it was a drill sergeant in the army that lived here. It wasn't entirely tidy. Clothes were strewn over chairs, uniforms and regular ones, and band posters were on the walls. It looked like a flat some kind of music obsessed college student would live in.
It did have that look of a place someone had quickly tried to clean to make it look presentable for company though. I smiled at this. She should have known she didn't have to impress me.
I opened the pizza box in front of me and saw there were only 2 slices that were gone from it. Damn, did she expect me to eat all of this or something?
"Hey you."
I turned my head and saw her. She had her hair done in a ponytail today, a look I hadn't seen yet. She was wearing a black crop top that showed her stomach and some simple jeans. Was that a belly button ring I saw? Definitely not authorized, I joked to myself.
"Hey..." I smiled at her. I motioned to my uniform and chuckled. "I feel like I'm overdressed in comparison to you..."
"Nonsense, you look beautiful as always."
I blushed. I still couldn't believe that I was actually here in her house.
"If you want to you know, you can change into some of my clothes for a few hours while you're here so you don't have to mess up your uniform. I don't mind at all." She said, coming and sitting next to me on the couch. She sat with her legs crossed. It was then I noticed she was barefoot.
"What time do we have to leave?"
She frowned. "Already trying to get rid of me, huh?"
I laughed. "You know what I mean! I want to know how much time we get to spend together..."
"Well it's like 2 now, we're gonna have an accountability formation at 8 for everyone later on on the drill pad, so... I'd say we should leave here about 6:30 or so just to be safe." As she spoke she was brushing her hand through my hair. It had been put up in a bun, which was the regulation when wearing any army uniform. We couldn't have our hair down, as much as I wanted to.
"Well..." I started, "Maybe just some jeans or something instead of these pants... I don't want to completely change."
"Sweetie, if you're gonna take off the pants, might as well take the shirt off too. I'm not gonna lie, I kinda feel like I can't even touch you right now when you're wearing that, I don't want to mess it up. And it can't be messed up for tomorrow, y'know?" She explained, looking me over.
"So basically... you're ordering me to change." I grinned.
She pursed her lips and bobbed her head side to side. "Yeah... kind of."
"Alright then, drill sergeant. I will change for you." I laughed, getting up.
"Ew, please none of those formalities in my house, Sel... get enough of that on base." She stuck her tongue out.
"I hope you have some smaller jeans though, you know... I don't have as much going on back here as you do..." I motioned to my butt.
"Oh shut up, so they might be a little loose, who cares..." She threw one of the pillows on the couch at me as I left the room.
I came back a few minutes later, holding the jeans up I'd found with my hands. They didn't stay up on their own. "Yeah, see this is what I was talking about." I laughed.
"Well you know, you could always just NOT wear pants. I mean, I wouldn't mind, just sayin..." She winked at me from the couch.
"Such a perv... I love you." I smirked, and walked - more like waddled - to the couch and sat down again.
The jeans were a bit baggy, but I was exaggerating just to mess with her. I'd picked out a simple t-shirt with them, so I was comfy now.
She put on a movie, and I laid my head on her lap and snuggled into her. She had her hand on my head and gently brushed my hair. She'd lean down and kiss my head every so often.
I turned my head to the side so I was looking up at her. Who cared about the movie? I could watch a movie any day. I didn't have much time left to see her.
"So... I never would have suspected you'd have a belly button piercing." I observed, looking at her stomach.
I thought it was a ring earlier, but I learned it was just a diamond stud upon closer examination.
"I have a few piercings. I just obviously don't wear them in uniform. Well except for one."
"Mmm?"
"Yep, you're laying on it right now."
"Huh?" I lifted my head from her lap slightly. It was then that it dawned on me what she was saying.
"Oh my god, Dev! Are you serious?!"
She smirked and nodded. "Yep. I got it back when I was dating Denise. Luckily there's no regulations about that particular...area."
I covered my face, embarrassed. "Well, you're just full of surprises, aren't you? Oh my god..."
She giggled. "Are you blushing? You must be more sheltered than I thought..."
"C'mon, I never would have guessed that you'd be the type... I mean, obviously I know what it is and all... I'm just surprised... wait, did it hurt?" I found my curiosity taking over. Not every day you get to ask questions like this. Especially to your drill sergeant...
"Fuckin right it hurt!" She laughed. "What do YOU think?"
"I never even thought about getting...you know what, never mind. New subject..." I chuckled nervously.
"Just... word of advice. Don't be near a tattoo and piercing parlor when you're drunk with a significant other. Then you start talking about 'good ideas' and well...yeah." She laughed.
"New subject, new subject, please!" I pleaded, laughing.
"You're so cute." She smiled.
I could only smile back in response.
"You know what though..." She said, putting her hands under my back and sliding me backward on the couch, "I think I have a new subject for you that doesn't require much talking..."
I scooted back, sensing what she was thinking about.
When my legs were over her lap, she lifted one of her legs from under me and over mine and leaned over on top of me.
She stayed suspended a few inches over my face, as her hands traveled up my sides to my neck and cupped my face.
"I love you." She said softly.
"I love you, too..." I said breathlessly. I felt helpless in the best kind of way. We'd never been able to be in this kind of position before, in her office at the barracks.
"Wait... I'm not being a very good host, am I? Would you rather watch the movie?" She laughed, quickly bringing her hands to my sides and tickling me.
I started laughing uncontrollably, "Oh my god, stop! No, I don't give a shit about the movie!"
She giggled. "I had to ask."
I swallowed when her face turned serious and she had a sensuous smile on her lips. "You're so gorgeous. Why on earth did you join the army?"
"I could ask the same of you..." My voice was barely above a whisper.
"Well..." She raised her eyebrows, "I never would have met you if I didn't, so I guess it all worked out, huh?"
She lowered her lips on mine, brushing them softly, not committing to a kiss. She was driving me crazy. I felt her warm breath on my lips, and it sent tingles all throughout my body.
I don't know how she was doing this, but she was making me feel like this was the first time she'd ever kissed me. It was definitely the first time she'd ever kissed me like THIS.
I tried to close the gap between our lips but her lips curled into a smile, preventing it. Instead she made a trail of kisses down my chin and to my neck. I automatically leaned my head back and fluttered my eyes closed, allowing her access to my neck. She brought a hand to the back of my head and traced a finger along the inner part of my ear as she continued kissing my neck.
Good lord she knew what she was doing to me. It caused my lip to quiver. How could she make me feel so... inexperienced?
Her lips made their way down my neck and past my collarbone, kissing softly each time so I could hear the sound of her lips leaving my skin.
Half of me wanted to just give myself up to her completely, allowing her to do whatever she wanted with me, and half of me wanted to fucking kiss her already, she was teasing me so much.
"Dev..." Her name escaped my lips involuntarily.
"Mmm?" She said in between kisses acknowledging me.
"What are you... doing?" I said, out of breath.
She kissed her way back up my neck and right below my lips, and whispered, "Loving you."
"Okay..." I gave up. I don't think I could have said anything else if I tried.
Finally she kissed me on the lips, softly at first, and then harder, as she closed her legs in a tighter straddle around my body. I felt her hands go beneath my shirt and up my back to my shoulders, pulling me into her.
I felt like her plaything. I was doing my best to return the favor, but she'd already managed to drain me in a few minutes. And right now, that was fine with me. I'd never felt so loved in my life. Not anytime before that we'd kissed in the evenings in her office, not ever. She'd been holding back on me all this time. Had she even known Sanders would say yes to this whole plan?
I scolded myself for thinking about these things, distracting myself from the feeling of her lips on mine, and her hands gently massaging my shoulder blades.
I tried unsuccessfully to find her shoulders with my hands as we were kissing. I know I was unsuccessful, because she intercepted and pinned my hands down on the arm rest of the couch, and I felt even more of her weight on me. It was like my lips were sustaining her full weight, which made me feel useless again.
"No..." She whispered in between kisses. "You're mine right now."
Well, I couldn't argue with that. I don't think I had ever felt like I actually belonged to someone as much as I did in this moment.
I felt her chest press on mine and we were so close together that I could feel her heartbeat. It was fast, as mine was.
Her hands moved around to my front, underneath my shirt, and began rubbing in between my breasts and massaging around my collarbone, all in perfect rhythm with her kisses. Goddamn she was good at this...
She then brought her hands out and relinquished her hold on my hands, only to guide them around to the back of her thighs. It seemed she was going to allow them here. I rubbed them, sensing I should do something right now to make HER feel good, as she was most definitely making me feel. But I sure felt like she was the one doing all the work. I guess that's how she wanted it.
I ventured to bring my hands up to her waist, and to my surprise, she didn't stop me. As our tongues entwined each time in harmony, I grew more adventurous, bringing my hands up her sides and on her breasts. I could feel her breathing quicken as we kissed when I did this.
This was going to be it, I could just feel it. Today was the day we would finally be able to show each other just how much we loved each other.
My hands explored her entire body as we kissed, and she made no objection to any of it.
I felt her hands travel down to my thighs through my jeans, while she simultaneously lifted my shirt and kissed down my stomach as she inched backwards.
She looked up at me. I could already feel that my forehead and hair had grown sweaty after all that had just transpired.
She smiled and I smiled back at her. "Are you okay with this, Sel?"
I nodded, swallowing.
"The plus side to my jeans not fitting you... is they are quite easy to take off." She chuckled softly.
"Y-yeah." I stammered.
"Sel."
"Yeah?"
"Are you sure? Cause if you're not ready, that's totally fine with me." She smiled warmly at me. "I know I may have gotten a little carried away... I can't help it with you."
"I know, Dev. I... I want this. I do." I managed, still out of breath.
I realized I may have sounded hesitant, but there was no greater truth in the world. To be with the woman I loved. The one that had always believed in me, the one that had always taken me back despite my actions and my hasty words. Most importantly, the woman that loved me just as much as I loved her.
The rest of today and the future after today was irrelevant at this moment. All that mattered right now was US. To love each other other in the truest sense of the word.
She crawled back up to me and kissed me again. "I love you so much. I just want to show you, okay? It doesn't seem right you should be able to leave without me doing that."
"I want to, too. You're right, Dev. There's nothing I want to do more right now. This... this may be our last chance." I struggled to say the last part.
"This won't be the last time, Sel. I don't know how I know that, but I do. You just have to trust me." She smiled.
I forced a smile. "I... I think I know that, too. You're right."
She kissed me again. "No turning back now. You're absolutely sure?"
I nodded and smiled, genuinely. We would see each other again. She was right. Somehow, someway, we'd find a way.
"I'm sure."
Shortly afterward, a run of the mill one bedroom house littered with band posters and a half-eaten pizza, with some movie playing on the TV screen in the background and with the person I loved completely... became my heaven.
Author's Note: Yeah, needless to say this isn't the last chapter like I originally planned. More coming soon :)