I woke up at around ten thirty. My head felt a little heavy but the head ache wasn't there so I climbed out of my bed to go to Lynn's room.
George went home at around mid-night. I poured out my heart to him. He is such a good listener. I always wanted an older brother who could take care of me. Now I got George. (sorry 😂 )
I still love Lynn as I have always loved her. She grew up way too fast. She matured a little too early because life showed her the worst side of the world at a very young age. But that is okay because at least I have Lynn here with me. There are people who cry and wipe their own tears and pick themselves up and move on because no one is there to rub their back and say that it is okay.
I knocked on Lynn's door waiting for her response when I didn't get one I went in. She was sitting on her bed scrolling through her tab.
"Hey! Laura, thank goodness you came I was so bored," she said putting her tab away.
"Hi," I said as I sat on her bed.
"So... how have you been?" she asked awkwardly.
"Better,"
"Good!" she said smiling.
"So have you thought about what I suggested?" she asked me when I didn't say anything.
"Not really... I don't know I am just regretting keeping this from mom and dad and everyone else. I wish I told everyone. Maybe things would have gone a different way." I confessed.
"Laura, no amount of guilt can change t he past and no amount of anxiety can change the future," Lynn said. There we go. She is just twelve but still she says these deep things that leave me either wondering or amazed.
"I know you are right.. but I am scared on what might happen when all of this is over,"
"Laura, we hurt ourselves because we obsess on the end of our journey. Focus on staying in the moment and on being grateful on where you are today. Be thankful that you are here right now. That we are having a normal conversation, confessing to one another and seeing each other," she said bringing tears to my eyes.
I can't believe that this is my twelve year old, younger sister. The one who has more experience of this pain than me and this fact is clearly showing.
"I would miss you Lynn," I said as I hugged her tears falling form both of our eyes.
I have no idea what would happen with either of us. I am not scared for me or her I am scared of the aftermath of this all. If any of us would ever recover from it or not.
Sometimes the people you want to be the part of your whole story are only meant to be one chapter.
(I have literally zero idea why I wrote an EXTRA deep chapter... I'm okay I promise 😂)
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