Elena barely felt Caroline shaking her arm as she stood there, eyes glued to the white wall in front of her. It wasn't possible that she was pregnant. Well, of course it was a possibility, but it still couldn't be. She had done everything she needed to do to prevent it. She wasn't ready to be a mother. Stefan didn't want to be a father. And right now, she was in the middle of her worst nightmare and the only glimpse into the future she had was the possibility of losing Stefan.
"Elena" Caroline said, a little louder. Elena finally turned her attention to her, still in a daze of shock and denial. "Do you think you are?" she asked again.
Elena shook her head. "No" she answered. "I mean, I don't know" she corrected, walking over to a set of chairs sitting against the wall and sitting down. Caroline followed her. She let Elena sit for a few moments with her thoughts, all the while rubbing her back in slow circles because Elena looked like she was going to faint. "We were careful" Elena finally said.
"You and ..." Caroline said, approaching the topic of who the father was, very carefully.
"Stefan" Elena said quickly. "Of course, Stefan" she said, feeling a little frustrated that Caroline would think she had been with someone else. Though, she couldn't really blame Caroline. No one knew what Elena had been doing the past month in LA. She let out a long, painful sigh before continuing. "He doesn't want kids" she said, resting her hand on her forehead.
"He'll want yours" Caroline countered. She was well aware of Stefan's view on marriage and kids thanks to Katherine. But what he had built with Elena was special and Caroline knew he would be happy about this. Well, after the initial shock, of course.
"He's dying!" Elena snapped, jumping up out of her seat.
"Elena!" Caroline gasped. That was the last thing she had expected to come out of Elena's mouth. Since when had she lost hope? But Elena was crying and clearly scared and overwhelmed. "Don't talk like that" Caroline said, a bit more calmly.
"A baby is the last thing we need right now" she said sadly. Elena wiped at her tears but realized it was no use because they kept coming.
Caroline wrapped her arms around Elena in a comforting manner. "Why don't you schedule a doctor's appointment and find out for sure. Then we can go from there, okay?" she asked. She made sure to say "we" to let Elena know that she had a whole family behind her. One that would support her until the end. Well, minus Katherine and sometimes Damon. But for the most part, it was a great family to be a part of.
Elena pulled away from Caroline and shook her head. "I can't deal with this right now" she said.
"Elena, if you are pregnant, you need to start taking care of yourself" Caroline said, digging out a granola bar from her purse. "That means eating and sleeping."
Elena took the granola bar and smiled weakly, brushing away a few more tears. She wanted sleep more than anything right now. She hadn't slept in two days. "I know" Elena told her. "I'll set up an appointment tomorrow" she assured her.
"Okay" Caroline smiled. She watched as Elena stepped around her and headed back towards the waiting room. She sat back down on the chair and sighed deeply. This should have been an exciting time for her best friend and Elena. Babies were supposed to be happy news and Caroline should have been jumping up and down at the thought of planning a baby shower and buying little baby designer clothes. But with Stefan so sick, it made the situation heartbreaking. In all honestly, Caroline hoped that Elena wasn't pregnant. Not right now, anyways.
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Stefan was watching TV when Elena came back to see him. He looked a little more awake, but still tired and worn down. "101 Dalmatians" Stefan said, looking from her to the TV. "Lily wanted to watch it and then five minutes into it, she took off. Something about green Jell-O downstairs" he said, clicking the TV off. He looked at her when she didn't say anything. "What's wrong?" he asked, concern washing over him. Elena felt like screaming that everything was wrong. But she didn't. She burst into tears instead. "Hey, come here" he said, holding his hand out as she walked over to him and sat down by his bed. He kissed her hand and smiled. "What's wrong?" he asked again, choosing to ignore the fact that his impending survival might have been the answer.
But she chose a more selfish answer. "I'm just so tired" she admitted, hating herself for being so selfish. Here he was, sick in a hospital bed, and she was crying because she hadn't slept in two days. Actually, she was probably crying because she hadn't had any sleep and she was overly emotional.
Stefan smiled. Sleep was an easy fix. "Elena" he said, waiting for her tear-filled eyes to meet his. "Go home and crawl into bed" he told her. "Come back tomorrow morning. I'll still be here" he promised.
But Elena shook her head. "I'm not leaving here" she told him. Everyone else had taken turns going home to sleep. But she couldn't because she would never be able to forgive herself if something happened to him while she was away.
He looked straight into her tired eyes, trying to remember the day that he had first met her. Her eyes had been filled with so much fire and now, it was gone. It was no use arguing with her. "Come lay down with me then" he said, slowly moving himself over as far as he could go.
"There's not enough room" she told him.
"I'm making room" he said, tugging on her hand.
"I don't want to hurt you" she said, remaining where she was in her chair. It was too small of a bed and he was already hurting.
"You're not going to hurt me" he told her, tugging on her hand again. "Come on" he said, refusing to give up.
"I haven't showered in two days" she tried again. Then she realized how disgusting she probably was.
Stefan laughed. "You could be the smelliest person on this earth and I would still want you next to me" he told her. If that didn't get her up there with him, he wasn't sure what would.
She sat there for a moment and contemplated what she should do. A bed and Stefan's arms seemed so nice right now. "Okay, but if you need me to move at all, you have to tell me" she warned as she stood up.
Stefan agreed, even though he knew he would never say anything. Elena carefully crawled onto the bed with him, careful not to bump him. But it was Stefan who wrapped his arms around her, pulling her back as close to his chest as he could. "Much better" he whispered in her ear, keeping his arms securely around her waist. She froze for a moment, thinking about the possibility of a baby and Stefan having no idea that it wasn't just the two of them laying there. "I love you. Get some sleep" he told her.
"I love you too" she said quietly. As soon as she let her eyes close, the last thing she remembered was Stefan kissing her shoulder before she was out.
He still couldn't fall asleep, but he at least had some piece of mind with her there with him.
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Elena opened her eyes slowly and heard the beeping monitors. She looked down and saw Stefan's arms still around her. She wasn't sure if he was awake too until she felt him kiss her hair. Elena sighed sleepily. "How long have I been asleep?" she asked.
"Seven hours" he replied, kissing her hair again. "The nurses and doctor have been in here six times."
Elena carefully and very slowly rolled over to face him. "I can't imagine they were all too happy to find me in this bed with you" she said, taking in his tired eyes.
Stefan shrugged. "I think they were just happy to see you sleeping" he told her.
"Did you sleep?" she asked, reaching up and brushing his hair out of his eyes. He needed a haircut.
Stefan grabbed her hand. "A little bit" he told her, leaning in and kissing her gently. Elena closed her eyes, desperately wanting him to keep kissing her.
But the kiss was short-lived when the door opened and Lily came bounding in. She stopped immediately, holding tightly to the numerous things she had in her arms. Elena sat up and smiled at her. "What do you have there?" she asked.
Lily looked from Elena to her uncle, trying to decide on how best to answer that. Stefan had his finger up to his lips, telling Lily not to say anything. "Nothing" Lily answered.
"Nothing huh?" Elena asked, sliding off of the bed and walking towards her. Elena grabbed a bag of Skittles out of Lily's arms and held them up, turning to eye Stefan carefully. "I happen to know that Skittle's are your Uncle's favorite" Elena said. Elena also grabbed the brown paper bag from Lily and opened it. "Bacon Cheeseburger?" she questioned.
"I don't know why she has those" Stefan said, feigning innocence.
"You told me to bring them to you!" Lily accused. She glared at her uncle for trying to pin the blame on her.
"Snitch" he said, glaring right back at her. Lily retaliated by sticking her tongue out at him.
"You know you can't be eating this stuff in here" Elena reminded him. "You are on a restricted diet of what they give you."
"What they give me tastes like poop" he said, forcing himself to use a much tamer version of the word he really wanted to say.
Lily giggled. "That's gross Uncle Stefan" she smiled, making her way to the chair next to his bed and handing him a bag of gummy bears.
Elena shook her head disapprovingly and he figured he had better behave. "Thank you for getting these for me, Lily, but Elena's right. I should only eat what the nurse brings me" he explained.
"Okay" she sighed. "I can eat all this for you then" she volunteered. "Except the white gummy bears because it tastes like poop" she said, smiling proudly at her new phrase she had learned.
Stefan grinned as Elena rolled her eyes. The last thing anyone needed was Lily going around saying that things tasted like poop. "Why don't you go and share some of that with everyone else" he told her.
"Elena can have the peanut butter cups" she said, offering them up to Elena.
"Thank you" Elena said, taking them from her. "Go give this to Alaric" she added, handing the brown bag over to her. Lily hopped off of the chair and left the room as quickly as she came in. "How did she even get all of that stuff?" Elena asked.
"She likes to press the buttons on the vending machine" he answered. "I spent forty dollars one day just so she could press every button."
"You spoil her" Elena said, shaking her head but all the while smiling. There was nothing more precious than the two of them together.
"She's worth it" Stefan said.
Elena had to agree. She stared at him for a few moments, studying him. "You look a little better" she said, wondering if it was just wishful thinking or not.
"I feel a little better I guess" he shrugged. Still some pain and exhaustion, but nothing like the day before.
"I uh, I should go and make a few phone calls" she said, checking her phone and noticing she had a missed call or two. She almost felt guilty spending time away from him when he was up and awake.
"Take your time" he told her. "You really should run home and shower. You would feel so much better" he said.
Elena nodded. "I guess I could go real quick" she said.
"Real quick" he agreed. "I'm going to try and get a little more rest."
Elena moved to his bed and bent down to kiss him. He reached up and grabbed onto her elbow, holding her there until he was done with that kiss. Elena smiled. He definitely had to be feeling a little better. "See you soon."
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Sleep was out of the question as soon as Damon came in to visit an hour later. He looked surprisingly well rested. "Well don't you look well-rested" Stefan said, hiding his jealousy only slightly.
Damon shut the door and smiled. "Yeah, I got a little sleep. Lily went to bed pretty early last night" he said, taking a seat next to him.
"How's the babysitter going?" Stefan asked, continuing with the small talk.
"She quit" Damon replied. "Something about Lily being extremely demanding" he sighed. "Elena never seemed to have any trouble with her" he said, trying to figure out if his child was indeed evil or it was just the babysitter.
Stefan chuckled lightly. "Elena doesn't put up with anything" Stefan reminded. "Unlike us who bend to Lily's every will."
Damon smiled. "She is pretty spoiled, huh?" he said. "I guess I just want her to be happy" he said, running a hand through his hair.
"She is happy" Stefan said, quick to add his own thoughts. "I never thought I could love anyone that much" he added.
Damon looked at Stefan for a long moment, trying to swallow his guilt but figuring there was no point anymore. Not with Stefan being so sick. "It should have been you" Damon said, his voice taking a serious tone. "She should have been yours."
Stefan shook his head, hating where this conversation was going. "She wouldn't be the same little girl if she were mine. You know that Damon" he told him. "We don't need to talk about the past" he added, feeling uncomfortable with it.
"Yes, we do" Damon disagreed. "What I did was wrong. I should have told Katherine no" he said, feeling disgusted with himself as he talked. "I knew how much you loved her. How much you had planned for a future with her. I should have said no."
"But you didn't" Stefan stated. "And it hurt like hell and I hated you for a really long time. But it happened and hating you and hating Katherine won't fix anything" he added. "Things turned out okay for me. I'm still a part of Lily's life" he reminded. "And ..." he began, but didn't finish his sentence.
"And you met Elena" Damon finished for him. "So, are you guys back together or what?" he asked.
Stefan sighed. "I want to think so, but I don't know" he admitted. "She's not wearing her wedding ring." That observation had hurt.
"Did you ask her about it?" Damon asked.
Stefan shook his head. "It's not really my business anymore" he answered. They had been apart for a month. And he had essentially blocked off all contact with her.
"You don't think she was with someone else do you?" Damon asked.
"It's crossed my mind" Stefan sighed.
They sat quietly for a moment. "I don't think she would do that to you" Damon said. "It's kind of nauseating, how much she loves you" he admitted. Stefan picked up on Damon referring to Katherine.
"She loves you, you know" Stefan said. "She just has a hard time of showing it sometimes" he added. "And for the record, I forgive you. You and Katherine."
Damon perked up a bit. "Why would you do that?" he asked. What he and Katherine had done was unforgivable as far as he was concerned.
"Because it is the right thing to do" he answered.
"You're a better man than me" Damon said. "Just get better, okay?" he asked.
"I'll get right on that" Stefan grumbled as Damon stood.
"You're still as much of a pain in the ass as you were the day Mom brought you home" Damon said.
"Yeah, well, you're not exactly my favorite either" Stefan countered, smiling as his older brother flipped him off and exited the room. Once again he was left alone, but a weight had been lifted. Although his conversations with Damon were never really deep, they got the point across.
XXXXXXXXXXXXX
Damon was somewhat surprised to see Katherine sitting by herself down in the cafeteria. She was stirring her coffee, staring intently at it. He took a chance, awkwardly joining his own wife at the small table. "I can go get you real coffee" he offered, taking in her unusual quiet self. Katherine kept stirring. "Where's Lily?" he asked.
"Zach took her home to take a nap" she answered.
Damon nodded. "Good idea probably" he said. Lily was a force to be reckoned with when she was tired.
"Are we just wasting our time?" she asked suddenly, looking up at him. "You and me. Were we over before we ever really started? Because Stefan told me to work things out with you, but I don't really see a point if one of us wants to call it quits" she stated.
Damon took a moment to process what she was saying. "Are you saying you want out?" he asked, a small lump forming in his throat. "Because if it's the money you're worried about, you know I'd still take care of you even after you left" he mentioned.
Katherine stopped stirring her coffee. "I'm not happy, Damon" she said, looking into his eyes and seeing that her statement had hurt, but also seeing that he knew she wasn't happy either. He wasn't happy either.
"Well, I guess it is time to call it quits then" Damon said.
"No, Damon" she said, slamming her hand down on the table. "I want you to make me happy" she said, her eyes locking with his once again.
"I tried" Damon told her. "I've bought you everything you could possibly want" he reminded her.
"I don't always want you to buy me things, Damon. I want you to pay attention to me!" she replied, feeling frustrated. "I want what we had before Lily was born. Passion. Excitement. Sex at three in the morning because we both wanted it" she rattled off. "You don't pay attention to me anymore. And I'm tired of having to get that attention from others."
Damon was a little surprised at the conversation they were having. But he read her loud and clear. If only she had said something earlier on. "I love you, Katherine. I always have. But if you want sex at three in the morning, you have to tell me these things. Because I have spent the past six years feeling like you hate me."
"I never hated you, Damon. I was bored with you" she replied. "And yes, I want sex at three in the morning" she added. Anything spontaneous would be better than living the same old boring life with him. Damon stood quickly and grabbed her arm, pulling her up. "What are you doing?" she asked, eyeing him suspiciously.
Damon looked around the area. "Being spontaneous" he told her, walking them down the hall quickly. He checked every door along the way until he found one that was open. A linen closet. He pushed Katherine inside and followed before locking the door. Katherine felt her back slam into door as he kissed her passionately. "Was this what you had in mind?" he asked, playing with the hem of her shirt.
Katherine smiled, clearly liking where this was going. "It's a start" she said, yanking off his shirt and tossing it behind him.
XXXXXXXXXXXXX
Alaric slowly approached Caroline with two cups of coffee. She had spent a lot of her time at the hospital by herself and it was beginning to worry him. "Coffee?" he asked, holding a cup out to her. She smiled weakly and accepted the coffee. "Can I?" he asked, referring to the seat next to her.
"No one else is sitting there" she replied, taking a sip of her coffee. "Any more news on Stefan?" she asked.
"No. But the doctor did say he's not getting worse. He's just not getting a whole lot better either" he answered. Caroline nodded, a sad look lingering. "He's going to be fine. You know that" he told her.
But the only thing she could think about was the possibility of Elena being pregnant and Stefan never getting to see his baby. "I just feel so helpless. When we were kids, he was always the one taking care of me" she mentioned, playing with the lid on her coffee.
"He knows you're here for him" Alaric reminded her. "He's lucky to have a friend like you."
Caroline laughed. "What's with you acting all nice to me?" she asked.
"Can't I be a nice guy?" he questioned, finding it a little unfair that she thought he was such a terrible guy.
"You've never been nice to me" Caroline pointed out. Okay, so she had a point. But it wasn't because he didn't like her. It was quite the opposite. "You don't like me" she pointed out.
He decided that he could either argue with her about that or show her how wrong she was. "You're wrong about that" he said, taking her coffee from her and setting it down. Before she knew it, he was holding her face firmly and leaning in and kissing her.
She pulled herself away from him in complete shock. "What the hell are you doing?" she asked, breathing nervously.
"Proving to you that I don't hate you" he told her, leaning in and capturing her lips once again.
This time, Caroline didn't pull away from him. Instead, she held into his arms and put as much effort into that kiss as he did. It was amazing. Far more amazing than she thought it could be.
When they broke apart, they both saw Lily and Zach staring at them. "Uh, we were just ..." Alaric said, stumbling over his words.
"No, please, don't let us interrupt you" Zach smiled, shaking his head as he and Lily walked away.
"Are they gonna get married now?" Lily asked, holding Zach's hand.
"Probably" Zach said, shaking his head in amusement. They turned down another hallway just in time to see Damon and Katherine coming out of the closet, giggling like teenagers. Zach rolled his eyes.
"Was you guys playing hide-and-go-seek?" Lily asked suspiciously.
Katherine, still breathless, clung to Damon's side and smiled. "Something like that" she said, kissing his neck, clearly letting him know that she was ready for them to go and hide somewhere else.
"Why are you guys all sweaty?" Lily asked curiously.
Damon looked at Katherine and almost lost it. "It was tag hide-and-go-seek" he answered.
"Oh" Lily said. "I don't like that game" she said, tugging on Zach who look appalled that they would do that sort of thing in a hospital linen closet. They continued to make out long after Lily and Zach had left.
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Why had she picked up a home pregnancy test to take instead of just scheduling an appointment with a doctor? Because she wanted to know now. Without Caroline hovering. Elena stood at the far end of the bathroom while the pregnancy test sat on the counter. She was counting in her head until she needed to check it.
Her foot bounced as she leaned against the wall. She bit one of her nails down. She continued to remind herself that Stefan didn't want kids. He had said it and made it perfectly clear. She also reminded herself that he loved her and if she were in fact pregnant, he would have to love the baby too. If he could even survive long enough to know the baby.
Maybe there wasn't a baby though. Maybe she wouldn't have to look him in the eyes and tell him he was going to be a father.
"Okay" Elena told herself, eyeing the counter. It was time to look. Time to realize her fate. She took small steps towards the counter and picked up the test. She had to get it over with. She had to know so she could plan for her future. "Okay" she repeated, taking a deep breath before she looked down at the test in her hand.
Pregnant.