I remember years ago, someone told me I should caution when it comes to love. I did. I did. And you were strong and I was not. My illusion, my mistake, I was careless I forgot, I did. And now. All is done there is nothing to say, and now you have gone so effortlessly. You have won. Go ahead and tell them, tell them all I know now. Shout it from the roof tops write it on the sky line All we had is gone now, tell them I was happy and my heart is broken all my scars are open tell them what I hoped would be impossible.
Falling out of love is hard. Falling for the trail is worse broken trust and broken hearts. I know, I know.
-Shontelle.
"Errm- Zac you know that night-"
"Eyy Zac; Mum said come home now it's important" Parker said bursting in the Kitchen with the phone in his right hand. He slowed down when he saw that me and Zac were in complete silence and I looked worried.
"Oh; did interrupt something" Parker slowly. When neither of us replied he closed the door slowly.
"Mum said hurry your arse home" he said as he said quickly as he closed the door
"I'm sorry was it really important?" He said as he took out his phone.
"Errm no; not really we can talk another-"
"Hello?" Zac was on the phone.
"Yeah why do I have to come home now?"
''...''
He nodded his head. His jaw clenched immediately. His eyes became a tad shade darker. He nodded as if the person on the phone could see him. I was guessing it was his Mum for obvious reasons. He hanged up and went into the hall way looking for his shoe, I followed worried.
''Zac what's up?'' I said following like a lost dog.
''Nothing important. I'll call you tonight yeah?'' He said as he finished tying his shoelaces; then shot his head back up and pecked me on the lips quickly and then closed the door. His lips were to their usual soft shelf; they were hard and rushed. I puzzled myself as I walked up the stairs.
''Aalliyah you okay?'' Omari said as he opened the living room door. He must have heard the door bang. I nodded as I went up the stairs- just nodding at anything that came out of his mouth. I wasn't paying any attention. Today had been a long couple of hours- all I needed was my bed and paracetemel. I jumped in my bed dreading the half term.
*
I rubbed my eyes and looked at the time on my phone. 1 am. Lovely I had woken up in the middle of the night. It would be virtually impossible for me to go back to bed. I had 13 missed calls and 9 messages 3 voice mails. WHOA! I was popular. I checked the missed calls 10 from Zac and 2 from a random number and 1 from Omari. I automatically called Zac. No reply. - I called the random number back; praying it was a T-Mobile number. It rang for a while until someone answered
"Yo!" Sigh. It was parker number.
"Hello. Ermm I had a missed call from this number so... what did you want?" Parker started laughing.
"What seems so amusing?" He regained himself.
"You! Your 16 and you're talking like your 50 years old- about 'hello'" he said copying me in a rich British accent. I sighed and repeated my question.
"Why did you call me?"
"Whooooa! Get a hold of yourself princess. Zac wanted you init. You bare pissed him off" he said laughing again.
"What- where is he now." I said frowning my eyebrows.
"Not here. What did you say to him when he left the house?"
"Wait' I'm baffled. He called your Mum then went home. "
"Ohhh- well when he hollers he hollers init. "My phone started beeping indicating I had another call coming through. I immediately hanged up- the person calling could have been Zac. Without checking the caller I'd I answered.
"Hello-Zac?"
"Wagwarn baby!" Oh good. I could tell when someone was high from Samuel and Omari &Zac was definitely high and being sarcastic
"Zac-are you okay I have missed-"
"Ohhh will you stop moaning. The only thing you probably miss is Omari" he slowly slurred.
"What do you mean?" He was high. Okay- you can say what you want to a certain extent.
"I mean I know. Everything. You are" he took at breath in, probably inhaling more weed "you are a slut. I mean "he started giggling "you really love of bad boy's dick. Omari; then Nathan. Come on. I come and I treat you right, then you just fuck me over. Say Nizzy. Mandem over pussy. "He said as he hangs up. It took me everything to just breathe. I closed my eyes as tears started to stroll down. I hadn't even bothered thinking how he found out- I just sat there with my phone in ear. My heart felt like it kept skipping a beat. My phone started vibration again. I dried my tears as the prospect of Zac calling me back popped in my head.
"Hello?" I said shakily whilst fixing my hair and face as if the person on the phone could even see me.
'''Aalliyah; have you been crying?''
''No'' It was Omari on the other end. His last thing I needed was him getting angry; then getting involved.
''Why lie?''
''I'm not. Why you even calling me?''
''Aalliyah; you've been crying. Why?'' it wasn't even a question, more like a statement.
''For fucks sake, I have not. I just woke up.''
''Fine. Lie. '' silence
''Whatever. Then you even calling me?''
''Cause Zac fond out init.''
''You don't say (!)'' I said as I put my head back to block anymore tears.
''Ohhh- is that why you're crying. What did he say to you?'' I could sense he was getting angry. His temper was far worse than mine.
''Nothing, we just talked. Omari why are you calling me?'' My left eye must have twitched. He chuckled.
''Your left eye twitched init'' I smiled. Whilst shaking my head. ''and your shaking your head cause you know your left eye is gonna twitch again'' We both started laughing at my stupidity.
''Leah you okay?''
''Yeah; why are you calling me Leah?''
''Cause your name takes too long to say. So it's either I call you Ah or Leah. You pick.'' I laughed whilst kissing my teeth.
''How do you know he knows?''
''I told him.''
''WHAT. OMARI WHY WULD YOU DO THAT!''
''WHOOOA. Neek try getting angry yeah? - And I asked you if you told him and you shaked your head when you were going up stairs. Aint that why he banged the door?'' I banged my forehead across my hand.
''No; he was on the phone to his Mum. Something is going on at home. He was rushing.''
''Ohhh. So why did you nod your head when I asked you?''
''I was half asleep!-what did you actually say to him''
''I belled him and was like sorry in it; are we still boys? And he was pissed init so I thought he knew. He was like what? And I was like the Aalliyah ting init. And he looked baffled. I knew you would just chat bare breeze in his ears. So told I him, we talked and were still boys.'' I could hear his fist pounding in the back ground as he explained.
''Yeah and he hates me.''
''Lee; he's just angry. Let him cool off and trust you'll be back together.''
''Why do you keep shortening my name''
''Cause it's a chore to say it.'' (My face> ¬¬)
''K.''
''When your calm call me back.''
''K.'' I'm not calling him back. I said as I hanged up and put my phone on my bed side. I got back into bed fully and just started at the ceiling. No thought process was going through my mind. I had no feelings. Zac knew. It was over. Nothing he could say or I could say could fix what happened or build that trust back up. We were done, over, died, collapsed. Whatever you wanted to say, me and Zac were done. It was only a matter of time before one of us said it.
I woke up to the first day of half Term. Mum was coming back on Tuesday /Tomorrow. I got out of bed and went into the shower; it's funny how water running down your body always seems to clear your mind. I got out the shower- did what you do- then went to get changed into simple jeggings, and a white vest top; blue cardigan (home clothes basically) and some socks. I left my hair in a bun and made my way downstairs. Sam's friends were conked out in the living room, I checked the time 11am. Wow, this was early even for me. I went into the kitchen in search for Ice Cream, currently my Best friend to be. No such luck. As I left the kitchen I caught a glimpse of all the fattening food in my house in the bin; Samuel and his god forsaken friends. I went back upstairs; grabbed my phone, Zac's jacket he had left form Sam's party and £15. I walked downstairs as I checked the living room once more for any food. I really wasn't in the mood to leave my house. I sighed as I walked down my road to the nearest Tesco. No oyster card; walking to clear the mind. My phone started vibrating. Zac was calling. It funny how a shower and walking can clear your mind. Everything he said had come crushing down like bricks again.
''Hello?''
''You probably don't wanna talk to me but can you come see me?'' he said quickly.
''Errm, yeah sure. Where?''
''Park?''
''What time?''
''The one near your house and nowish. I'm here already''
''Okay'' I said as the phone went dead. No bye. I did a 360 back to the direction of my house and on enough arrived at the park. He was sitting on a bench looking at God know what. He looked so peaceful. So undisturbed. How many girls were walking past, pretty ones, and he didn't even look up. That was mine and I fucked it over for a couple of minutes.
''Hey'' he said without looking up.
''Hey'' I said sitting down next to him. He glanced over, squinting one of his eyes as the sun light hit his eyes. Perfection to the highest degree. He chuckled when he saw I was wearing his Jacket.
''You had that on when I meant you in it?''
''Yeah, you gave it me remember?'' we smiled as we remembered that day.
''It's funny. In a poetic way. I gave it to you the day we me and you have it on the day we-''
''Zac.''
''Aalliyah.''
''I am so sorry. I know-''
''I know. It doesn't matter. What happened happened? You can't regret what made you smile.''
''But its making me cry now?'' I said as my voice croaked up and tears started to come down slowly. He turned and hugged me.
''Aalliyah don't cry''
''I don't want to.'' He went back and wiped my tears. He sighed.
''You look beautiful, why cry?''
''Stop being nice to me, I don't deserve -''
''You do. You are an angel and trust me. One day your gonna be happy this happened. You and Omari belong together trust me.''
''You love to cut me off.'' I said laughing, ignoring his last comment
''Nargh. I love you.'' I opened my mouth to speak. ''Don't say it back unless you mean it.'' I closed my mouth. We stayed silent for a while.
''I'm sorry I called you a slut.''
''Don't be; it's true.'' He turned and screwed me.
''No, you really are not. I was just high.''
''Since when did you smoke?''
''When I'm overly pissed.'' I nodded.
''I'm sorry I fucked you about''
''Don't be. You didn't'' He said whilst smiling.
''I'm sorry I said you love dick''
''I'm sorry I lied to you for weeks.''
''Actually 2 weeks and 5 days.'' He said as he smiled. He remembered the day we started officially going out. He looked at me. I leaned in to kiss him, I really could not help it, but he leaned back smiling. He was perfect. And I had lost him.
''Bye Aalliyah.'' He said as he started walking away.
''Zac?'' I shouted. He turned back and raised his eyebrows.
''It was actually 2 weeks 5 day and 6 hours, if you count today.'' He smiled as he started walking away again. I closed my eyes and I could not control my tears from falling. I felt an unmistakeable prense in my lips. Zac. He leaned back after a couple of minutes. Smiled.
''I'm really going now'' He said laughing awkwardly. I joined in and once again he started walking, faster this time.
''Zac?'' He turned around once again smiling.
''I love you'' He smiled whilst nodding and walked away.
#Comment. Actually felt sad when I was writing this, Looooooooool.
-But seriously Comment J