I still can't keep that thought out of my mind, he was about to kiss me..not me, my hands but still. And those feeling I felt- my mind, my heart, my body, my stomach. God my stomach, it was like something was doing double flip. I can still feel that not that intensely. And I have to meet Emily, I think it's time when she knows.
After a long shower I went to her room. I knocked a few time then enter to room. Their room is normal with a big bed in the center moved to the wall, on left was the door to bathroom in the line of door. Infornt of the bed was a large tv on the right side of tv was the walk in closest which is the largest closest I have ever seen one can fit a king size bed in there even after there is some room left. James and his shopping habits. Best thing about Emily's room is the balcony facing the woods, I can also see the waterfall.
Emily was sitting near the door to the balcony wearing a light red maxi dress. James was also there much to my surprise. It's 11, this time he is always with Alpha doing some paper work or planning or training or something else. He was massaging Emily's head gently, her eyes were closed but even after that she sensed my presence.
"About time you come." Her voice cold. She didn't open her eyes, James turned and gave me an apologetic look. When I didn't say anything she looked at me. "You could've atleast wish me morning."
"It's 11." I point a finger to the clock. Her expressions changed dramatically and she hoped up from chair, came near me and pull my ear with so much force I nearly believed that this is the last day of me having two ears. "OW! It hurts."
"Supposed to be. Now tell me what took ypu so long to come and meet me?" She asked without letting go of my precious ear so if I say anything and she doesn't like it, she will pull it again.
"Sorry about that. Now I am here, we can talk all day." She didn't look very pleased but realsed me. Good for a tiny woman she is really strong. Can I say out loud, no I love my life.
"Cool, Oliver is here so I am going to do some work. Emily if need anything ask me...no wait on a second thought ask him. It's his punishment." James come cross me and patted my back with a quiet best of luck he left room.
"You gonna sit or not." Emily sat in her bed, her back resting on bedpost blanket reached upto her waist. I sat next to her resting my head on her shoulder. She put a hand on my forehead running her hands through my hair. "You took a shower, right?"
"Seriously?"
"You did."
"How is junior?"
"I am just one month along, Oliver. But junior is fine." I nodded. I know what I want to talk but how to start this conversation? How to tell her that he brother is my mate.
"You went to see Alpha Andre yesterday." It's wasn't a question for which I grateful also now we habe something to talk which is weird because that kind of situation never occurred where I have to think what to talk with her. It was always natural.
"I am sorry." I sat straight to look at her.
"Why are you sorry? In fact you have nothing to do with it."
"Yeah that's true. But I have known it for so long and I never gathered the courage to tell you. You never brought up your parents, it felt like a forbidden topic. That feeling of not telling you was like I was doing something horrible. I.......I don't. I am sorry."With that there were tears in her eyes which I wiped with my thumb.
I wanted to discuss it so much with her. She knows about it, I have so many things going on my mind. Elliot, Nick, Mom-Dad, this upcoming war. It is definitely a war by how serious Alpha about it. All these attacks, fly in our pack who stll needs to be find. Everything is a mess. I know I can tell her, I can share my thoughts with her but is it right? Absolutely not. She is pregnant and all this drama could harm the baby.
She is a emotional person but now when she is pregnant, her emotiona level is getting higher. Crying, stress is not good for the baby. So I just rubbed her arms for some comfort. She gave me a side hug and I rest my head on her lap. She started running her finger through my sclap, this is so relaxing. She is my sister but her touch is so motherly. May be that's how it feels like to have a mother.
"How many people know about you?"
"Not many. You, Alpha-Luna, Marcus and Elliot and Norah. James is intended to keep it secret that I am not allowed out of my own room. He got so angry whenever he saw me out side but you know how can I possibly spend my all time coping in this room. I understand his concern but I need fresh air."
"What was James' reaction when you told him about junior?" She chuckled, good.
"Well, he didn't believe me at first. We have been together for long but this is first time and his eyes were wide. He was trying to say something but no sound came out. For a moment I freaked out I thought he might not want kids right now untill I saw him weeping."
"Woah he was crying?"
"Not like a stupid, no yelling or shouting. Just tears. God he didn't cry when I said yes." She made a face like she ate something disgusting. " Forget about me, tell me about. Something new?"
New?
"Yeah. I didn't tell you one thing." She gave a look curious look telling me to carry on. This is time I know but words aren't forming up. My mouth has stopped corporating. I cleared my throat to get my voice back. I stood up from my place and closed the door for safety. Not like it's really helpful, werewolf's hearing is much stronger. I sat next to her, now she was giving me a confused look.
"Everything okay?" Her brow knotted together.
"I'll tell you straight okay. Just don't hit me after this and interrupt me, please. " She glared at me with frustration. "When we went to Miami for Elliot's wedding. I found my mate there." Her eyes were wide with excitement so before she could say something I held my finger to shut her up. "Listen first then I'll listen to you. So I was confused at first because I don't have a wolf to tell me who my mate is but it doesn't matter."
"WHY?"
"Because my mate is married Emily. Married and a parent."
"Married, child. So you are saying th... wait your mate is human." She stated. I nodded my head as a answer. She rubbed her temple and turned to me. " This whole situation with attacks wasn't enough. Now your mate is human. Good thing you guys are not together." She is concerned about me but her words punched something and it hurts. My face have showed my emotions because she gulity after saying.
"Yeah I guess." My voice came out cloder than I expected. I moved my eyes to looked at picture of her and James. This picture is taken on new year. James is standing next to chair on which Emily was sitting. They are both looking at each other smiling. I want that kind of a relationship simple yet whole. James is always busy with pack and bussiness but he never let that come in between them. He always makes sure to give her attention.
I feel jealous. Jealous how everyone is happy, how everyone is with their loved ones, how Carmen is happy with Peter when they are not even fated. Even Hanna and Drake are going all way to different country. They will be twith their mates soon. And me god knows what be happen to me. This happiness, that feeling when someone looks at you like you are the light of their life I will never be able to experience those things.
Sure he is having some problems with Mrs. Robinson but are these problems so big to break their relationship? I don't think so. But all his actions around me, confuses me.
Emily took my hand in her small ones. She glanced at the photo and sighed.
"Relax I know what you mean. It just hurts whenever I think about all this. God I wish I was a normal wolf with a sexy mate." We both laughed and I sighed a sigh of relief. Emily has to be happy, she shouldn't take stress. After catching her breathing back she asked what I have been waiting for her to ask.
"Who?" Good question. "Do I know her?" Her?
Oh God she is so wrong.
"Him." I correct her and hearing this a big grin placed on her face and she scooted closer to me. "Aren't you too happy?" She rolled her eyes and I mimicked her.
"So who is he?"
"You know him." She titled her head "He has been living with us....in the pack house." She still looked slightly confused untill she did her calculation. Her eyes almost shot out of the socket and her mouth hung open.
"Oliver tell me you are joking?" I shook my head. How can I joke about something like that. She went quite, not saying anything which was making me anxious. Is she not happy to hear that I am his brother's mate, a male? On the top of that I am not a full wolf.
I didn't want to cry but tears were welling up and my breathing was increasing slowly. She gripped my hand tightly.
"I know what you are thinking I happy that Elliot....Elliot is your mate. I don't care if you are both male or if you are halfwolf or what is happening right now. I just can't believe that I never noticed this. Never noticed you looking at him." A mischievous glow showed in her eyes and she smiled widely. "God now everything makes sense."
"What makes sense?"
"First tell me why your face looks like a rooten egg?"
"I thought that you..that...I don't know."
"Oh Oliver sometimes you are just so cute like a small puppy." She cooed pinching my cheeks.
"Now you tell me what did you mean by everything makes sense?"
"Oh that, ever since Elliot met you he has been asking questions about you. I never paid much attention to it. But now I can see why he is so interest and being so curious."
Is it normal for my heart to beat like a racing car?
"You want to know what he aksed?" She wiggled her brows. She is teasing me and her teasing is actually working.
"Does it matter? For a reminder you brother and my lovely sexy mate is married."
"Sexy hmmm."
"I also said he is married."
"God Oliver, your gear has stuck to it. So what if he is married. I know he feels the pull. Trust me I have been there. At first it's all so confusing but soon you can't stay from that one person. I know what he is feeling. All you have to do is woo him."
"And about Nick?And Norah? They are legally married. What will happen to them if I continue to chase after him?"
"I know what you are trying to say here. And I understand, I am going to be a parent. Even if Nick is not his son biologically, Elliot will never let him go."
"You know Nick is n.." My thoughts cut short when she replied.
"Yeah. He told me. Everything. But that's not the point here. The point is that you are so buttheaded that you think Elliot will leave Nick just to be with you which is absolutely ridiculous. That's not how things happen Oliver. Elliot is smart and adult. He knows what he wants, do you know what you want?" Her piercing gaze made is uncomfortable. I don't think I get what she is saying. If Elliot loves Nick so much, why would he leave him. Being with me means leave them, right?
And there is also this thing with Alpha where he wants me to just finish all this with him even though there is nothing to begin with.
"Alpha told me to reject him." She sighed heavily. Her features looked angry. She is amgry, how do I know? After a good slap, I do know.
"You know what is problem Oliver, you are a coward. You are afraid of being rejected and after hearing all this bullshit I think you really deserve a second slap."
"That's not true. I am not coward." I managed to say, controlling my own anger. How can she say that?
"Well yes you are. I feel like you are making excuses to avoid him. When I am saying he feels the then damn it he feels. If he didn't, he would be so interested in you. Stop thinking about others including Alpha. James told me what he wanted you to but you don't have to. He is here for just more two weeks so man up and face him. Be bold and go after him. I am his sister asshole when I have no issue then why aren't you doing something."
"But Alp.."
"Not again. I am not going to repeat this speech. I totally get why Alpha wants this rejection but it's your life and only you get to decide what to do with this, okay?" She gently placed her hand on my cheek which she slapped so hard. "And I am not sorry about slapping you. I can see Elliot is taking steps towards you, baby stpes but steps now you have to decide if you want to come forward or backward."
I want to take step towards him, I want to feel his hands in mine, his body next to mine. Am I seriously not making any progress here? What about him? If a choice is given to him, will he choose me instead of his wife and son?
Will he?