Compton, California
UKI SAT AT THE KITCHEN TABLE, arms hanging loosely at her sides while the side of her face was pressed against the table top; watching her mother-in-law mop the dining room floor a couple feet away from her. The house was quiet except for some soft Patti LaBelle, Kendra was playing.
Uki's reality had fallen back on her, she had fallen back into a deep depression, she was now eighty pounds and was often sick because of it. It didn't seem like she was getting any better any time soon. Her weight gain pills and medication didn't seem to make a difference, because she often threw them back up. This time her body was forcing her too.
"Girl, come lay down on this couch and get your head off that cold granite." Kendra, stressed.
Kendra was French's mother. Although Uki and Kendra had a good relationship, French and his mother hadn't spoken in years. Once French was seventeen they had stopped speaking. It was the age he first started out doing hits. And being so young at the time, he wasn't that sharp yet. So his mother had found various items of a victim that had been reported missing on the news in her son's room, along with the murder weapon which was an 8'' knife.
Kendra had kicked him out the house, completely heartbroken. From that day forward they hadn't said a word to each other. Kendra would never purposefully give her son up to police, but at the same time if anything came back on her she wasn't going to prison for him either. As much as she loved her son, God came first and French was a killer. She couldn't be associated with him due to his profession.
The only reason she accepted Uki was because she could not atone for her husband's sins. Kendra knew Uki since she was thirteen, she'd grown up as part of the family. Her and French were high school sweethearts and one of the only real friends he first had when he entered high school. So Kendra had formed her own separate bond with her. She wouldn't shun Uki because of her son's decisions.
Plus, with Uki being anorexic, Kendra tried to help in anyway she could. Taking her to some of her doctor and therapy appointments, pitching in money when she could and also taking care of her when she got sick. She only stopped when French moved her out to his house. He wrote a letter once to his mother telling her he no longer needed her help anymore aiding with Uki. Kendra was happy for Uki when she and French got married last year. She would always love her daughter in law and she would always be welcomed in her home even if her son wasn't.
"I'm okay ma..." Uki groaned, her voice hoarse. Her whole body ached and all she wanted to do was sleep. Just so it could stop the hurting.
French was out getting the car fixed, which is what he told her. But she knew most likely he was on a mission. Probably hunting his next kill like he got paid too.
"Can we just talk? It can be about anything, it'll kind of distract me from the pain." Uki mumbled.
She came from the doctors office two weeks ago and was told she didn't have long to live. She had developed so many health problems now as a result of her dangerous and constant weight gains and weight drops. She was also severely anemic, always dehydrated, had insomnia and had low blood sugar. So recently life had been really different and tense for everyone involved. There was fear, anger and sadness among everyone. Uki noticed ever since she got the news of her short life expectancy, French started taking her to his mother's house a lot and only came back for her at nightfall. She realized he probably just wanted to be alone to secretly grieve.
"Are you and French thinking of children?" Kendra asked, it was her way of asking about her son without trying to be too direct. She didn't want to seem like she personally cared about his life that much, but she was still a mother so she did.
"French said no, he doesn't want any." Uki said, her attention now on the large yellow plastic bowl that contained a bunch of fruits. She used her index finger to play around with the bowl.
"No?" Kendra asked with furrowed eyebrows, pausing her cleaning session as she stood upright with the mop in her hand. The house smelled of strong Pine-Sol.
"He said it'll be too painful. He doesn't wanna a constant reminder of me."
Kendra frowned, she found that odd. Usually in situations like this the other person would make sure they would want something important from that person. "And how do you feel about that?"
Uki wasn't offended, she understood it wasn't anything to do with her. He just wasn't strong enough to look into the face of someone he would have to see for the rest of his life. If anything she was worried about how French would take her death. She hoped his life wouldn't spiral out of control. That was what she was more worried about these days. Not her death, but how he would be after the fact.
"I don't know...but I understand his reasonings." She said, glancing back at her mother in law who looked at her sadly before going back to moping.
French's father wasn't in his life, he was the type that had a hundred different kids everywhere. He was known for getting females pregnant left and right and being nowhere to be found. He knew who his father was but could count the number of times he saw him on one hand. Kendra was a single mother when it came to French and raised him on her own from birth with no help.
"How are you and your little brother lately?"
Emon came around more but it still wasn't consistent. It was much better than before, they hung out once or twice every few months or had conversations on the phone for hours at a time the once in a while they got into contact, but other than that he was still young, being up and down the place.
"He's doing better, still running around trying to find himself I guess. But we speak and hang out when he remembers me." Uki joked.
Kendra was about to say something funny but jumped, startled by Uki's sudden violent coughing. She looked over at her, seeing her tapping her chest as she coughed uncontrollably. She ran over there and pat her back, rubbing her shoulders soothingly. Once she calmed down Kendra got her a glass of water. She sighed, placing it in front of her. Uki picked it up and drank from it as silence filled the kitchen. Kendra stared at her daughter in law pitifully. Uki instantly placed her head back on the table once she had drank some of the water.
"Ma...before I go I want you to promise me something."
"Child stop talking like that," Kendra said, she herself knew death was approaching but she didn't want to deal with it either.
"Repair your relationship with French, you guys need each other."
Kendra closed her eyes for a split second before opening them again. It was a soar subject for her. "Uki—"
"I know Kendra, but he's still your son. Let God deal with him, we all have too answer to the man above some day. But you be there for him, please. For me..."
Kendra bit her bottom lip and looked away; not saying anything.
For the rest of the day the two bonded, Uki eventually moved from the kitchen and to the couch where they watched talk shows, listening to the latest celebrity gossip or watched movies. She had spent six hours at the house when French pulled up. He called Uki's phone, never getting out the car when he came in front of Kendra's house.
Kendra helped her pack all her stuff and they hugged and said their goodbyes. Uki made her way down the driveway and into the car.
****
"Babe," Uki whispered, listening to the car tires running against the asphalt, "can we go to the museum?"
"The museum is closed Uki, it's eight o' clock at night." He said.
She slowly turned her head and looked at him, "Please?"
French sighed out loud and barely nodded his head in response. "Okay Uki," not to sound like he was annoyed with her he picked her hand up and kissed it. He knew one of the security guards that worked there and French would throw him a $1000 to roam around for an hour. He'd turned the cameras off so no one would know people were still in there.
Security usually left three hours after everyone else because they had to stay behind to check every nook and cranny of the building to make sure people still weren't inside. That took a while so French figured the guy was still there or probably getting ready to leave. Instead of driving there and giving him a chance to be gone, he pulled out his phone and called first. The phone rang all of three times before Hank answered.
"French?" He asked. They hadn't spoken in a while but he recognized the number.
"Yeah, you at work?"
"Literally getting ready to walk out the door now. I'm the last person here."
"Can you stay behind for an extra hour? I know you wanna go home but I got a grand if you let me and my girl in. The time will fly like that."
Hank chewed on his bottom lip on the other end. He honestly just wanted to go home. His job was usually smooth sailing but today was a rough day. He got cursed out by two different people and had to break up a fist fight between a woman who left her child unattended and a woman who felt the need to confront her about it.
He made decent money as a security guard, but a thousand dollars was a lot of money, too. He always took French up on his offer so this time should be no different. Last time he threw it toward utility and bills. This time he could use it to splurge, put it toward rent, put it in his bank or do whatever it was he had to do. He didn't have work tomorrow anyway so an extra hour wouldn't hurt his sleeping schedule.
"Okay man I got you. Same way, through the back door. I'm turning off all the cameras now."
"You're a lifesaver, thanks Hank." French hung up and held Uki's hand the whole way there.
They frequented many museums but the Natural History Museum of Los Angeles county was her favorite. She went all the time and loved going back to the same place as if she hadn't already explored everything they had to offer. Something about it was just peaceful to her.
It was a forty minute drive from where they were but French made it a twenty minute ride when he went ninety miles per hour through the streets. He parked up the block and fetched Uki on his back. She got tired and fatigued extremely fast and he didn't need her passing out.
Slyly they made their way to the back of the building and as promised the door was open. They got inside and were greeted by Hank. He made the perfect guard. The man was 38, dark skin and bald but stood six foot six and two hundred eighty pounds. He could pick a grown man up with by the neck with one hand and toss him out a window.
"Whassup," French said slapping the rolled up stack in his hand. He always walked with large amounts of money on him. He was a cash, not a credit card guy.
"One hour, don't get lost." Hank said as if they hadn't done this over a dozen times.
With Uki on his back, they walked around the museum, looking at all the artifacts or pictures on the wall with the plaques under them that gave history on what the picture was about. The lights were on because the cameras were off. It was like their own private tour.
French had no idea why she loved to roam this one particular museum all the time and look at the same things, but he guess it brought her peace of mind. She had a passion for these things. He could feel her soft breathing on his neck. He walked up to the first portrait they saw and glanced at it before slowly walking down the line to take in all the rest.
They went upstairs to the gem and mineral hall. French has been here enough times with Uki to know there were over two thousand minerals, meteorites and rocks that came from across the globe—she'd kill him if he didn't know something like this.
"That way French Fry." Uki whispered, pointing to a large golden rock in a large square shaped case across the room. He took her over to the Mojave Nugget, the largest known nugget in California gold. She stared at it longingly, wishing something like this could be in her vintage collection. "Beautiful, isn't it?"
"I guess." He mumbled.
The kiss she placed on the back of his neck made the hundreds of fine hairs raise and a warmth to shoot up his spine. Instinctively he raised her higher up on his back as they continued to walk around the room looking at all types of rocks, minerals and meteorites. They touched billion year old meteorites, came across diamonds and rubies and re-read the plaques that gave information on them for the hundredth time.
He took her another level upstairs, every step he made echoing. He was never scared being in the museum alone. He was a hitman, nothing could scare him. Uki always told him it didn't bother her either, most likely because she was with him so she felt safe. There were so many dinosaur fossils that it was too many to count. They saw the replica LC-130, an aircraft that was used to take people on a virtual ride over Antarctica, but of course the machine was off. They came across Cryolophosaurus, a twenty five foot long dinosaur. They saw the Taniwhasaurus skeleton, a dinosaur fossil mounted in two skinny black poles.
"The Taniwhasaurus is a carnivorous marine reptile, French Fry."
"I know baby girl." He said.
They even got close to look at the skull of Sauropodomorph. French licked his lips, "This was more like a newer species of dinosaur I think. This type also came from Antartica right?"
"Uh huh." Uki smiled. She thought everything in here was so beautiful, "I'm jealous. I wish I could just take all this stuff and put it in my collection in the basement."
French got ready to take another step but paused, trying to look over his shoulder at her. "You want them? I'll—"
"Stop French Fry, no."
They continued to roam the museum until their hour was up. They walked out past Hank and got in their car, continuing on their way home.
****
French rubbed circles with his thumb on the bare skin of Uki's legs. The room was quiet and dark as they both sat up, him against the headboard and Uki between his legs, in nothing but panties and one of his long sleeve shirts with her back against his chest. This is what French loved to do, recently. Marinate in negativity. Stay in dark rooms and just hold her.
"French Fry, talk to me baby." Uki said, watching his finger run circles on her skin.
He didn't though, he kept his eyes on the wedding ring he bought her over five years ago. It was a very expensive ring at twenty five thousand dollars. Uki would've taken a hundred dollar ring, she didn't care; but French honored her too much to do something like that. He spent the money out of his love for her. It was actually an entire paycheck from a hit he made back then. The job was twenty five grand and he took all the money and used all on the wedding ring.
He stared at the crystal rock on her hand, his mind so clouded, he didn't even know what he was thinking about.
"Husband." Uki sang playfully.
"Stop Uki..." He whispered, he hated how she always tried to make light of a situation, it was kind of annoying.
"I was just going to ask you to turn up the music fool, my song is on." She laughed.
French snapped out of it and perked his ears as he heard the faint sound of music. He looked around and noticed she hooked her phone up to the speakers in their room using Bluetooth. French did as she asked, getting out of bed to turn the volume up on the song "You Like To Risk It All/Things Will Never Be The Same" by her favorite hip hop artist.
French clenched his jaws, burying his head in the side of her neck from behind. "I love you." he breathed. He probably said it a billion times a day.
She slowly turned around, on all fours between his legs. She pecked his lips, the lyrics softly playing in the background. When he didn't respond she climbed into his lap and wrapped her arms around her, as he to continued to kiss him.
He placed his hands on her behind and could feel the bones under her skin. She was so tiny that it hurt him, he pulled away and turned his face. "We can't, you're not healthy enough for this. I don't want to hurt you."
"It's okay, you won't." She said into his ear, snaking her hands up his shirt. The fact of the matter was, soon from now she would be nothing but skin and bones and he'd never be able to touch her again. She was in pain, but these were there last moments together and she wanted them to be memorable for him. "Make love to me French..."
French cupped her small face, kissing her so passionately it caused her to get dizzy. She had to grip his shirt, but he already had her's off as he lifted her arms and threw it on the ground beside them. He flipped them over so she was on her back as he laid long kisses from her breasts down to her hip bones.
She closed her eyes, hoping that he wasn't disgusted by what he saw. She was glad the lights were off so it wouldn't look that bad.
"You're so beautiful, Uki." He said into her ear causing her eyes to pop open. He stimulated her body, playing with her nipples, whispering sweet nothings in her ear and kissing on her until he felt moisture.
He got rid of his shorts and positioned himself at her entrance. He placed his hands on either side of her head, watching her face carefully as he slowly entered her. Any sign of pain and he was stopping. He went in very slowly, inch by inch. It was taking every muscle in her face to feign one of pleasure instead of the pain she was actually feeling.
French's hips moved softly between her small thighs. Uki swallowed the lump in her throat, ignoring the stinging of her nose and eyes, it hurt that badly. The moon peeked inside the room, outlining the muscles in French's back. Uki groaned, closing her eyes as he clenched his jaws, burying his face in her neck. She was getting smaller everyday and sometimes he couldn't stand to look at her like this.
It hurt for Uki. Everywhere hurt. But she didn't care. She wanted it to hurt. She would do anything to feel him right now. She wanted to be apart of his soul. She moaned as slight pleasure started to mix in, her walls tightening around him. French pulled his head back and the disappearance of the warmth from him made her eyes open.
She was met with glassy eyes as silver tears now dropped onto her face. He never stopping stroking; she placed her hands on his face, kissing his tears away, but they kept falling. Onto her ears, her cheeks, they were running down her face like they were her's.
Her hands were so feeble against him, almost like skin and bone. French met her lips, using his tongue to part her lips as their tongues danced. Images of a healthy Uki when they were younger invaded his mind making his fingers clench the sheets on the bed.
Uki was basking in the pain and pleasure, the silence soaking up all their emotions and letting it linger in the air. French sat up, bringing Uki upward with him. He sat in the middle of the bed, stretching his legs out as he sat Uki on his lap, gently bringing her up and down on him.
They stared into each other's eyes and Uki smiled, kissing his forehead. "I love you."
French wrapped his arms around her, it could almost go around her body twice. Uki moaned as his member massaged her walls. Uki brought his head up to face her, "You want us to try for a mini us?" She smiled. It was a long shot at this point because she might not live that long to deliver it, but it was his last chance.
French shook his head from side to side. There was always and only would be one Uki he would love. She didn't know, but he was planning on leaving this Earth right behind her. He just didn't want to tell her because he didn't want to take the chance of doing something to her heart when she was already so sick.
She circled her hips on him, causing both of them to hiss at the climax approaching. French felt himself cumming, Uki moaned begging him to keep going. Two minutes later, he blasted his seeds deep inside her, as Uki shuttered on him at the same time, looking up at the ceiling.
It was silent as she used the time to come off her sexual high, but she glanced down when she felt wetness dropping onto her skin. She saw French wiping his eyes with the back of his arm.
"French Fry, it's okay, you'll be okay." She whispered.
"I love you so much Uki please don't go..." He bursted out in tears. "Please stay with me ma! I swear to God I'll do anything for you, just don't leave me. I can't do this shit without you!"
Uki held him as he released all his pain into her. It was the first time in a long time a tear came from her eye as well. Lately she hadn't been able to cry because she had accepted her faith a long time ago. She had just been ready to go, the pain too much for her. But also coming to the realization she'd never grow old to see French, or be something in life, go places and create memories, or open her shop killed her. Soon from now, she would be no more.
She lifted his chin, "I don't blame you, you're human. Just know, I forgive you. I know you love me, but you need to live too. You'll be confused and even hate yourself at first. But you'll forgive yourself and you should. I never blamed you for being tired and I don't."
French looked at her, his lips trembling. "Wh-what? What are you talking about?"
French allowed Uki to hold his head to head to her chest as he just cried. He couldn't knock the dreadful feeling he felt in his chest. He promised he would love every part of this woman, everyday until it was their last.