"He is with you wherever you maybe, and Allah(SWT) is seeing your deeds." Quran: 57:4
Allah is with you, and He sees all your doings, be it indoors or outdoors, because He is the most Knowledgeable and the Creator of all creations.
Samirs pov
You'll know you're long gone, when you see her reflection in every window,
You'll know that it's deep when you see her face in every cloud,
Her voice in every music,
Her thoughts consuming your mind,
You'll finally realize that she owns you whole, when her entire being, thoughts and memories fills you whole.
What I've been trying to avoid for quite a while now, is slowly but firmly filling the void of my heart- or rather what used to be an empty heart.
The past few days or weeks I've been praying to Allah to grant me whatever that's khair for me- for us.
I also silently wish that she will somehow become one of my rib, so I'll always be close to her.
"We're here." Mama Zainab announced.
We arrive at Aunt Sarahs, as Affan aka the love of my life hasn't been feeling well and lets not forget how Abhi is being lazy to have let his wife drove us here.
We hop out of the car, Abhi being the last to come down; "Habibi you don't want me to carry you inside do you?" Mama asks jokingly.
My father crack a smile; "I wouldn't mind." And he wink at her, i shook my head with a smile on my face and made my way inside the house.
I just open their main door; "Assalamu Alaikum." I said, closing the door, my parents won't come in anytime soon, I'm sure.
"A lil knocking won't hurt." Aunt Sarah says, she's feeding baby Affan ceralac.
"Duhh." I said kissing my babys cheeks and he squeal, he is looking healthy Alhamdulillah, tho he lost some weight.
"How are you my son?" She asks, "I'm fine, how is Affan feeling?"
"Alhamdulillah much better, where are your parents?" She asks, for a minute i forgot we're here together.
"They outside." I said absentmindedly, checking my phone for her message.
The sound of someone knocking the door made me look up; "I'll get it." Uncle Ibrahim says from the kitchen, he is also coming back to his normal self, Alhamdulillah, tho you can easily say he is still in pain.
He open the door, both my parents came in, we all sat in the living, talking about everything and nothing, drinking and munching biscuits.
After some hours we went back home.
*****
"Yea..so that's how." Arman finishes off with a smile.
"What's her name again?" I ask, uninterestingly? Well- maybe, he just finished telling me about the Hindu girl he met when he went to Mumbai last two weeks, apparently she stole his heart, and now he is thinking about all the ways he could to make her convert to Islam, because he wants to spend the rest of his life with her.
Arman making plans for the future, who would have thought.
"Sherlyn." He answered with a stupid smirk.
"Are you sure she's the one for you? I mean you don't even live in India, I'm sure your lifestyle isn't the same."
"I've never been sure in my life." He says while nodding his head at the same time.
I nod; "And do you think she'll convert for you?" I ask again.
"I don't think- I know she will, she loves me." He says.
"And you do?"
"Affirmative."
I smiled at him, patting his shoulders i said; "I wish you all the best bro, i will pray for you in shaa Allah, May He choose whatever that's khair for the both of you." And he hug me, i hugged him back, "What will i do without your prayers." He asks jokingly.
"Die. You'll die bro." I said and we both chuckle.
And with that we just sat on our beds using our phones, i miss home.
We barely have 7 months left to finish our degree, who would have thought?
By Allah i wasn't even joking when i said time flies,
A knock on our door interrupted my thoughts, i look at Arman hoping he would be kind enough to open the door but the just shrug his shoulders with a smirk and continue using his phone.
I shake my head and stood up to open the door, and no, i am not crying- you are.
There by the door stood my girl with a basketball shape cake in her hands, her friends behind her, almost 5 of 'em.
I shift to the side to allow them in, don't tell me y'all don't know that tomorrow is my 21st birthday, yes 21, i said it earlier and I'll say it again now,
TIME FLIES,
"Can we be halal already? I really wanna hug you." I said to Nihal walking closer to her, she smells super nice, it's— calming?
She giggles; "Haram bro." Arman spoke from his bed.
"Happy birthday in advance mate." Abbakar says patting my shoulder, "If it's tomorrow then why surprise him today?" Molly asks Norah; "Duh." Was her reply and i am struck by her beauty.
Subahanallah, Allah is indeed the Greatest, Masha Allah look at her, so beautiful, so calm, so, so, so perfect.
I'm losing my mind.
"Samir?" Ray calls amusingly holding my camera,
I'm sure he has seen Norahs unlooking pictures.
I still hate people, i huff, grabbing my camera from his hold,
I took yet another picture of her and Ray winks at me, i took the picture of the basketball shaped cake, we took group pictures.
As unbelievable as it may sound, i like all of them, they made my stay here worth it, and i couldn't be more grateful that i met them.
"Thank you so much guys, i really appreciate." I smiled widely at them and they flash me a smile.
I walk towards my girl who is sitting on my bed;
My girl?
Who would have thought?
And, no, we aren't official, i don't even know what we are, she confessed more than i can count, i didn't yet.
Coward? Probably!
But i am done lying to myself now, i definitely know that I feel something for her, what is it?
I don't know.
But i love the feeling, she makes me happy.
"Nihal." I called softly, she looks up from her phone, and i almost, for a split second got lost in her mesmerizing beautiful brown eyes.
She smiled at me and mouthed; "Happy 21st Samir." I smiled back at her.
"Thank you babe." And she gave a wrapped gift.
"You didn't have to." I sincerely voice out, "Open it." She sounds excited.
I unwrap the gift and guess what's inside?
You got it right, a freaking canon camera.
"I was so serious about being halal, i can't anymore." I said, whispering the last part, i smiled down at her.
"Thank you Nihal, this is beautiful, thank you very much, Allah is my witness i really appreciate it, thank you." I sit beside her and she took a hold of my hand, i stiffened.
Slowly but carefully i remove my hand from her grasp, Allah will question us, i know, i did it back then, and i extremely regret it, she isn't my mahram, yet.
I switch on the camera and click too many pictures of her, knowingly and unknowingly, she's too beautiful Masha Allah.
I cut the cake, and we ate with a soft drink, i have been smiling through out, especially if i make contact with my girl.
Almost an hour later the girls left and we the boys start playing fifa, yes it's Armans.
I enjoyed my day,
And it's not even my birthday how lucky am i?
Luck? I never thought the word exist.
In shaa Allah it will be a blessed year for me, for all of us.
We finished rounds in playing fifa and now it's time for maghrib, Ray went out and Me, Arman and Abbakar prayed with Abbakar leading the prayer.
We said our azkhar.
"Ima' go back to my room now, i wish you all the bliss life offers bro." Abbakar says, i smiled at him; "Amin, thank you." And with that he walks out of the room.
"I'm taking you out tomorrow." Arman mutters, closing the small fridge in our room.
Huh?
"Last time i checked i am not Sherlyn." I roll my eyes at him.
He chuckle: "Hush, i am taking you for a haircut, plus your beard is too much too." He says, and i reflexly caress the beard,
It isn't too much.
"Nah, I'm good, thanks." I fell on my bed.
And that's how we spent the rest of the night, at around 12:30am we called it a night.
I slept almost immediately.
*****
"Aw, another camera." I said, my heart warm.
"What do you mean another? Who stole my spot?" Abhi asks, "Habibi, no asking questions remember?" Mama said to him.
And he nod his head; Aunt Tee winks at me and i just shake my head at her.
The following day, which is my birthday i came back home, as I've never celebrated my birthday without my dad, even when Kabir was here, we used to celebrate our birthday(s) together, at home, as a family.
I miss him- them.
Immi(mum) your Samir is 21 today, my eyes welling up.
I'm sure she might tear up, because when we turned 13 she did, she was like;
"My boys are 13, Abdallah remember when we found out that i was pregnant with them? It- it was 13 years ago, Ya Rab! May Allah bless you my boys, immi loves you so much." And she kissed both our foreheads.
I remember scrunching my face after she kissed me, now— now I'll do anything in my will just for her to kiss my forehead one last time,
The first tear roll down my cheeks, i quickly wipe it and walk up the stairs to my room, i can't wrap a 21 year old Kabir around my head, a small laugh escape my mouth,
I enter the bathroom, perform wudhu, came out and prayed two nalfs.
I thanked Allah for blessing me with the gift of life, and i prayed for my mum, siblings and cousin and all the deceased muslim ummah, May we all reunite in jannah, Amin.
Still sitting on prayer mat, staring into space, lord knows i don't even know what i am thinking about.
Someone open my door, and Aunt Sarah came in view, she has a weak smile playing on her lips, she sat on the floor beside me; "Are you okay?" She asks softly, placing her palms on my shoulder.
I look her in the eye- her eyes like my mothers; "I miss them." I murmured, "Oh Samir." She called, her voice cracking and she hug me, i hugged her back..tightly.
"I miss them too." She muttered when we pulled away.
My lips tight but i manage to nod my head at her as if saying: 'I know you do'
She smiled at me wiping my tears, i did the same to her.
I love this woman so much.
My phone start ringing and Aunt Sarah hand me the phone, she has this knowing smirk, it's Nihal isn't it?
It's her!
I excused myself and answered the call, we talked,
She consoled me,
I thanked her,
And we talked about everything and nothing, laughing occasionally.
I seriously need to talk to Abhi,
About us.
Us.
****
Assalamu Alaikum beautiful humans❤️
I know, I'm sorry, i miss you too😂
How was your Ramadan? Eid?
Okay, Alhamdulillah, May Allah spare our lives to witness next yea in shaa Allah.
Amin❤️
Boring? I am sorry, girl probably lost some skills😂
Seriously i am sorry for taking long to update, in shaa Allah we back full force💪
I love y'all, so much🤞🏽❤️
Gotta go pray maghrib🚶🏾♀️
Malika🐪