Playlist:
Save Me- Nicki Minaj
Wanted- Hunter Hayes
Sledghammer- Fifth Harmony
***
Starting to step back, mortified to what just happened, I could feel the tears roll down my face. Unless it was rain because at this point a heavy drizzle had started.
"No." I said shaking my head in disbelief. "No I . . . didn't . . . I couldn't have." I stuttered trying to process how I let this happen. And for the second time today I ran. I ran back in the direction of my house and this time Michael followed me.
"Lauren would you stop so we can talk for a minute!" Michael shouted after me.
"There's nothing to talk about Michael."
"Oh so you're just going to ignore everything that just happened? What about us!" he pointed out.
"I don't want to talk about it right now."
"Why do you always do that!" he screaming at me as we made it back to my house and started walking up my drive way.
"Do what?" I groaned.
"Why do you always push people away?" he yelled. At this point the rain started to fall completely and thunder began to rumble. I turned around to look at him.
"Why do I always push people away?" I repeated. "You have to be fucking kidding me right now."
"No I'm not! Every time! Every fucking time I'm so close to figuring you out or I finally understand enough for you to let me in you always push me away and shut me out! I swear it's like you get a kick out of doing it!"
"Oh so you think I do it on purpose?"
"Yeah I do! Every Time Lauren, you do it every time! Why?"
"It's the only thing I know how to do, you jackass!" I screamed at him. "You know what my dad did to me! No one other than my mom has ever cared for me as much as you have! I don't know how to take it okay! Happy? I constantly lose people in my life! I've constantly have to let people go! I've been doing it my whole life! No one has ever loved me enough to show they cared enough to stay!" I screamed.
The rain start falling harder soaking our hair and clothes, rain drops were rolling down my face; the thunder echoing around us. The air was so hot that the cold, refreshing, rain cooled the air that we could see our breath from the difference in temperature. We stood there looking at each other for a minute.
"Give up on me Michael." I told him. "I'm a lost cause." After screaming at him and telling him to give up on me I expected he wouldn't want anything to do with me anymore. I was wrong.
The next thing I know his lips on mine and the pressure of his body pressed against me, pushing me against the side of my house; kissing me in the rain. Michael had completely taken dominance, taking my face in his hands, his lips controlling the movements of mine. My arms immediately wrapped around his neck, losing myself in the kiss.
"See again, you think people don't love you but I do." He said, shortened of breath, as he pulled away, still keeping his face close to mine so that our lips were lingering so close together.
"I love you Lauren." He said, brushing his forehead with mine, and I could see it in his eyes, the love and compassion that I've never seen in anyone's eyes before.
For the longest time I thought I would never receive the same love and support that my mom had given me. Ever since my dad's beatings I couldn't trust anybody, I had lost everything. Yet in a single moment, it had been reawakened in me. I had to fly half way around the world to escape the backend of a horrible tragedy, only to find the one person who loved me, my flaws and all. Michael Clifford saved me.
"I love you too." I smiled and leaned in and kissed him back. Michael's hands immediately went to my waist and picked me up so my legs would wrap around his waist. Carrying me to the front door of my house he opened the door and brought us inside out of the rain.
Once back inside, he continued to carry me up the stairs, how he managed to continue to kiss me while walking up the stairs I have no idea. But, once we were in my room and he closed the door behind him, he pushed me back up against the wall and started kissing my neck. I ripped his jean jacket off him and threw it on the floor and started tugging on the hem of his shirt.
He paused for a moment,
"Are you sure?" He asked nervously. "Like I know it got heated fast, but what your dad did-"
"Michael." I quieted him, leaning my forehead against his. "It's okay, I'm sure." I told him.
He smiled and started pecking my lips. He quickly pulled his shirt off, exposing his bare, wet chest, and he swiftly pulled my shirt off as well and tossed it on the floor, exposing my scares that have never left my body from those years of beatings. Michael's eyes drifted down towards my abdomen and lightly ran the tip of his fingers across the deep tissue scaring that have never left and will continue to stay there as scares for the rest of my life.
I could see in his reaction that he tensed up with anger.
"How could anyone harm someone as beautiful as you?" He said trying to strain himself from getting angry. "To his own daughter." He whispered, shaking his head.
"Michael." I said lifting his chin up to look at me. "He's gone. He can't hurt me again. I was broken and missing pieces of myself I had lost a long time ago and you helped me find them, and put me back together again."
A soft smile grew on his face. He picked me back and brought me over to my bed, laying me down so he was hovering above me. He tired brushing the hair out of my face, but my hair was soaking wet and clinging to my face.
"Finding them was easy; putting you back together was the hard part."
"Well you managed to do it." I said kissing him again, getting completely lost in the moment, letting our actions take over the rest.