Teri Kis Kis Khayal Ko Dil Say Juda Karun
Mere Har Khayal Main Tera Hi Khayal Rehta Hai
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She sat by the window, looking at the sky, like she does every night. The moon glowing brightly, starts twinkling and light clouds floating around the vast sky.
Subha ran her fingers lightly on the scar on her arm, the bitter-sweet memories of it brought a sad smile on her lips. The wound may have healed but the scar was still there, constantly reminding her of the wounds she endured on her heart.
Maloom Na Tha
Tum Yun Milo Gay
Kitnay Sahain Gain Sitam
She remember how it was the first ever full conversation they had. They might have been only 13 at that time, yet she was mature enough than most of the girls of her age.
She always saw Zaviyaar in an angry mode and it reminded her of the game she always played, Angry Birds. Hence she gave him the name, Mr Angry Bird. She smiled as she remembered what Zaviyaar's reaction was when she called him that.
He had frowned at her words and forbade her to never call him that ever again but Subha was Subha. She always called him that when she wanted to irritate him and it worked perfectly.
But then... she remembered the last time she had called him that. Six to seven years had passed since she last called him out... Seven years. She never for once thought that she would get so habitual of him that she would fall in love with him.
Ansu Bahain Gain
Sansain Thamain Gi
Kaisay Chupe Gain Yeh Gham
Subha sighed as she wiped the traitorous tear that escaped her eye. Why was she crying? She should have known they can never be one. He never thought of her like that. She might have been his wife but she was too small for him to consider her his wife.
She should have never hoped for him to come back for her. Why would he? She was nothing to him. Nothing. Why would he remember her? What would be the reason that would cause him to remember her? Nothing, there was no reason that could compel him to remember her.
He wasn't here because of her like she hoped he would cone back. It was just a coincidence that he taught at the same university that she studied. But what about that emotion he saw in his eyes when she looked at him? Subha shook her head, she was just imaging it. Just like she imagines him every single night for the past five years thinking of him as the reality but he was just her figment of imagination.
So what if he doesn't remember her? She won't impose on him, she will live the rest of her life with his love just like she always did. But atleast this time she would be able to see him and get the satisfaction of being near him. She will keep loving him from far, just like she always did. Yes, she will be hurt at every point of life for not being with him but what is love without hardships.
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He walked along the beach, his feet getting wet with the waves but he didn't care. He really had no care in the world right now. The only person he cared was someone that was far out of his reach. But he had promised himself that she would soon be where it was her rightful place.
Tere Liye Main Chod Doon Duniya
Tu Jo Kahay Ae Sanam
Saath Yeh Tera Chutay Na Mujh Say
Khayi Hai mainay Kasam
Zaviyaar took out his phone from him pocket. Going to the galary, he opened a folder. He looked at the pictures one by one, a smile adorning his face.
These pictures gave him the courage to go through the years without her by his side. Despite being away from her, he still lived every moment of her life with her. He knew every single detail about her. These pictures gave him the courage to live without her.
He placed his phone down and sat on the sand, a bit away from the water. Placing his index finger on the sand, he etched her name on it. Subha!
Saahil Pay Khara
Khamosh Rehta Hoon
Rait Pay Beth Kay
Tera Naam Likhta Hoon
He had every minute detail of Subha's life and he hated himself for putting her through all that. He knew what she went through every day due to his memories. If she had cried for him throughout the years, his condition wasn't any less. If she craved for him, his condition was the same. But he knew, she had the greater end of agony. His love in front of her was nothing. She loved him longer than he loved her.
But now he promised that he will amend all the wrong doings he did to her. He will amend for all the troubles he gave her. He promised to himself and her that he will fill her life with so much love that she will forget all her pain and wounds of the past.
He remembered the happiness and hope he saw on her face when he entered the lecture hall. He saw how the same hope and happiness turned into hurt and disappointment when he didn't recognise her. He had to seem indifferent to her in front of so many people. He knew how hard it was but it was important or else he knew he would lose control in front of the whole class. He didn't want to lose control. Because he knew once he lost control, there is no going back. And he couldn't let that happen.
He knew no matter how much Subha loved him and craved for him, the pain she endured was greater. She was hurt and angry even because of what he did and he would make sure he gets rid of all the bad memories that were caused due to him. He knew she was upset and angry at him for leaving her and he will make sure those gaps will be filled with his love.
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"Noor!" Anam called out as she entered Subha's room. Subha was doing her assignment when she heard her sister calling her.
Subha looked back, towards the door. "Yes Api?"
"I am so sorry to trouble you Noor but Asad is not home and I need some things from the market. I would have gone myself but Aliya is troubling me a lot today." She explained, an apologetic expression on her face.
Subha closed her laptop and books and smiled at Anam. "It's ok api, I'll go. Besides I have been sitting here since the morning. This way I'll take a walk and get fresh air as well."
She went towards her closet to change her clothes. "You can make the list of things you want till I change my clothes."
Anam smiled at her gratefully. "Ok, I'll wait downstairs."
Soon, Subha left the house and walked down the street. The supermarket was around the corner so it wasn't really a long walk. It took her exactly 15 minutes to reach the shop.
She took hold of the trolley and started to purchase the things on the list that Anam gave her. She was standing in an isle, looking for what she needed. She noticed the flour but it was on the topmost shelf and her height didn't allow her to reach there. She stood on her tiptoes to reach it but to no avail. She huffed and pouted, looking around to see if any worker was here who could assist her but found no one. She looked up at the flour, contemplating what to do.
She stiffened as she felt a presence behind her... a presence that sent a chill through her spine... the good kind of chill. She recognised who it was. She was too familiarised with the feeling of him to not ķnow who he was.
He was close. Too close.
She felt his warm breath on her neck, increasing her heartbeat. Goosebumps covered her arms at his close proximity.
From her peripheral view she saw an arm extending towards the top shelf and hold of the floor and dropping it in her trolley, all the while standing where he was.
Subha gulped and turned around, her eyes looking straight at his shoulders due to the height difference. She looked up and her breath stopped.
Ishq Main Tere Kya Mainay Paya
Kya Hai Yeh Mainay Kho Diya
Jaan Yeh Vaari Tujh Pe Piya
Mainay Yeh Jurm Kiya
He was looking straight in her eyes with an intensity that was enough to burn her. They were so close that even a paper couldn't fit through. They kept looking at each other's eyes, searching for something.
Their intense eye lock was broken by a mild cough as a teenager passed them, smiling at them mischieviously, winking at them.
Zaviyaar quickly took a step back, coming into present but stopped as Subha winced.
"Ouch!" Subha whimpered as her hair got pulled harshly when Zaviyaar took a step back. She looked at her locks of hair that were stuck to the buttons of his black shirt.
She took hold of her hair with trembling hand and tried to untangle them from his shirt. Her trembling hands made it impossible and it frustrated her. Her eyes became moist at the situation she was in. They were so close yet so far.
Zaviyaar noticed her wet eyes and it pierced his heart to see her in this condition. Her eyes were avoiding him and her hands were trembling as she tried her best to untangle the hair but it seemed to be a failed attempt.
He placed his hands on top her, making her hands tingle. Her breath hitched as their hands touched. "Let me." Zaviyaar whispered, her soft hands in his gave him a calmness that he never felt before. He never wanted to let go of her hands, ever.
Subha quickly pulled her hands back, letting Zaviyaar do what he wanted to. She watched his hands as they delicately untangled her hair and let go of the dark locks, caressing it as it slipped through her fingers.
"I am sorry." He whispered. He was apologising for everything he did knowingly and unknowingly. That sorry spoke many volumes.
"It-It's ok." Subha mumbled, looking anywhere but his eyes. She thought he was saying sorry for the hair that were pulled but she didn't know that that sorry was for him hurting her and making her cry.
"Get a room guys!" The same teenager whispered smirking at them suggestively as he came back to the same aisle. There was another guy with him this time. "I know you guys can't wait to romance but there is a time and place for everything." Both of the boys laughed as they went on to the other aisle.
Subha blushed deep red at the implications of their words. Zaviyaar scratched his neck, feeling embarrassed.
"Uh...thank you for the flour." Subha murmured as she turned around, away from him and started to walk away.
"Subha!" He called out, as he watched her move away from him.
Subha halted in her steps. Did she hear it right? He called her Subha. No one except him ever called her that, everyone called her Noor besides him.
At that moment she knew. She knew that he remembered her. She knew that he was aware of the fact that there was a Noor-e-Subha in his life. But why was he pretending to not recognise her?
Zaviyaar was aware that she knew that he knew her. And most probably many questions were running through her mind at this moment but he will answer he slowly.
One of her question he already answered that he didn't forget her.
Subha turned around, biting her lips and looked at him straight in the eyes. "Yes?"
"See you on Monday in class."
With that both of them turned around, a small smile placed on both their lips.
"Mr Angry Bird, I don't know what game you are playing but I am ready to play the same game. Let's see who wins." Subha thought to her self, her confidence growing back. "But thank you for letting me know that you haven't forgotten and giving me hope that most probably you came back for me because I know how much you hate teaching, you would never do this willingly.
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"Mr Angry Bird!" Noor called out to Zaviyaar who was sitting few seat away from her, sketching something on the sketch pad.
Zaviyaar rolled his eyes and glared at her. "How many times I told you not to call me that?" He asked, irritated.
Noor huffed in response. "How many times have I told you that I am not going to stop no matter what you do or say?"
Zaviyaar sighed. "Whatever. What you want?"
"Oh yeah. Can you please help me solve this sum that I am doing on my iPad?" She asked innocently, showing him the question.
He grumbled. "I don't know."
"Oh come on, don't lie. I can't believe that you don't know this sum while you are in university. Please help me."
"Listen Subha, I hate teaching someone something so I can't do this. Just skip the question and go to the next one." He said and got back to his work.
It was true, Zaviyaar could never teach anyone anything. It wasn't because he didn't know anything, it was because he hated explaining it to someone. It was one of his pet peeves. He never in his whole life taught something to anyone regarding the work in school or university. If anyone asked, he straight up refused hence everyone knew never to ask him.
Two weeks had passed since the kitchen incident and both Noor and Zaviyaar had developed some kind of peace. They weren't friends but Zaviyaar had stopped avoiding her. They spoke to each other when needed but nothing else.
Zaviyaar shut his sketch book and was about to go to his room when his phone rung. He called at the caller Id to see his mother's number. He smiled and got up, going away from Noor towards the garden.
"Assalamualikum ami, kesi hain." He asked. (How are you?)
"Allah ka shukar theek tum kesay ho? Kaafi dino say phone nahi kiya tumnay, mujhe fikar ho rahi thi." Concerned voice of his mother came from the phone. (I am fine, how are you? You didn't call from so many days, I was tensed.)
"Ami jaan main bilkul theek hoon. University main busy that toh time nahi mila, I am sorry." He apologised with a smile. (I am perfectly fine mom. I was busy with university so didn't get time.)
"Koi nahi. Sakeena aur Ayesha kaisay hain?" She questioned. (It's okay. How are Sakeena and Ayesha?)
"Theek hain woh bhi. Aapko yaad kar rahay thay, kaha tha kay aapko salam doon jab baat ho." (They are fine as well. They were asking about you, told me to convey salam the next time I speak to you.)
"Walaikumasalam."
"Aap khana time say kha rahi hain na? Aur dawayi bhi le rahi hain?" (Are you eating and taking your medicine on time?)
"Jee beta, sab kuch kar rhi hoon. Urwa mera bohot khayal rakhti hai, bohot achi bachi hai." She paused, hesitating to say something but Zaviyaar detected it. (Yes son, I am taking them on time. Urwa takes care of me a lot, she is a really nice girl.)
"Kya hua ami, sab theek hai." (What happened mom, is everything fine?)
"Mujhe nahi pata yeh baat batani chahiye lekin tum bhi iss garh kay fard ho, tumhara jan'na zaroori hai." (I don't know if I should tell you this but yoh are also a member of this family so it's important for you to know.)
"Bolain ami." Zaviyaar was worried. (Tell me mom.)
"Tumhe yaad hai jis ladkay kay car say Zafar ka accident hua tha?" (You know the guy with who's car Zafar met with an accident?)
Zaviyaar stiffened at her words. He looked towards Noor who was now watching cartoon on tv. "Jee?" (Yes?)
"Tumhe toh pata hai woh coma main tha toj aaj subha uski maut ho gayi hai." (You also know that he was in coma... he passed away today.)
The ground slipped from under Zaviyaar's feet. He kept his gaze on the 13 year old who was his wife. "Ami main aapsay baad main baat karta hoon." He hung up. (Mom, I'll speak to you later.)
He clutched his hair in his hands. Her brother passed away. How was he going to tell her this? She married him because of her brother but her brother left her alone.
With what Noor told him so far, he knew that she was really close to him. She will shatter when she finds out about it. No, he won't tell her. As long as she is here, she will never know what's going on with her family. Never.
He didn't know what more storms were going to come in their lives with the death of her brother. This might sound insensitive and selfish but there was a hope that with the death of her brother Mian Jee might change his decision. His revenge should have died with him. He hoped that it would be true.
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"If you think that with his death I will let go of my revenge, then you are highly mistaken Zaviyaar. He didn't suffer enough like we are suffering. If he didn't then his father and sister will. You will never be free Zaviyaar nor will she. You have one and a half months left, do as I say."
Zaviyaar threw his phone as soon as Mian Salahuddin cut the call. He looked upward. "Please Allah, please help me! If not me then please help that innocent child. We have no one besides You that can help us!" He prayed, corner of his eyes getting moist.
He'll have to speak to Bi Jaan. She can do something now. Salahuddin doesn't have to know about it. Till the time he finds out, all of this will be over.
🌹🌹🌹
"Oh man! I will never be able to get over the fact that he's so hot!" Skylar sighed dreamily as she looked behind Subha.
Subha and Ahmad exchanged a questioning gaze and looked behind them to see who she was talking about.
It was Zaviyaar Haziq, their temporary graphic designing lecturer. He was speaking to one of the student.
Subha narrowed her eyes at Skylar, trying hard not to scream at her. She wanted to tie a blindfold on her eyes so she's not able to see her husband and dream about him.
"He's not that handsome." She lied, shrugging in response. Taking a bite of the chips, she looked behind again to see him still speaking. "Definitely not hot. Besides he's our lecturer Sky, you should not speak like that about him."
Skylar swatted her hand. "Just a temporary one. He's not official so I can speak about him like that."
Subha clenched her fists. "He's really old."
"It doesn't matter."
'It will matter when you'll know that he's the same Zaviyaar, my husband.' Subha thought to herself, glaring at the plate of fries.
"Guys!" Ahmad interjected. "So I have an announcement to make that will change my life."
Both the girls looked at him curiously. "What announcement?"
"I am getting engaged." He announced with a broad smile.
"Wow! Congratulations." Both of them congratulated him, genuinely happy for him. "Who's the girl?"
"Thank you guys! Her name is Aima, mom's friend's relative's daughter." He opened his bag and took out two cards. "Mom told me to give you guys the invitations and told me to tell you guys to make sure you come or else she's going to come to your respective houses to drag you."
"We will definitely come. How can we miss this opportunity." Skylar yelled in excitement. "Man, I really want to experience desi weddings."
"Why do you have two more cards?" Subha asked as she saw him put two extra cards back in the bag.
"To give it to Mr. Zaviyaar and Miss Malini." He informed.
Subha scrunched her eyebrows in confusion. "I get why you inviting Miss Malini because she is your mom's friend but why Zaviyaar?"
"Oh, I forgot to tell you guys. When I told my dad about our new lecturer and how we got an opportunity to work with him, he told me that he knew him. He worked with him few months back on a project and they formed a friendly bond so he told me to invite him as well."
"What is your family man? They know all your lecturers." Skylar was amazed.
"Not all Skylar, only Miss Malini and Mr Zaviyaar." He corrected her.
"Same thing." She shrugged.
Subha was in deep thoughts, her suspicions were turning to be true.
Firstly, Zaviyaar teaching at the same university where she studies when he absolutely loathes teaching and then meeting in a grocery store all of a sudden after his arrival. And now him knowing her friend's father. There is some connection to all this. Day by day she was getting sure that he had come back for her and that thought made her happy.
All this wasn't just a mere coincidence.
Khairiyat Nahi Puchta, Magar Khabar Rakhta Hai
Main Nay Suna Hai, Woh Mujh Par Nazar Rakhta Hai
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Not edited.
Hi guys!
How was it?
Bye Take Care!