Feelings Incarnate | ✓

By -netha

136K 6.6K 7.4K

Kiara always had her focus set on her studies and being the perfect daughter for her strict mother, but when... More

༊Feelings Incarnate
Prologue
01 | New Beginnings
02 | Knickers In Twists
03 | A Cat That Saw Salmon
04 | Lies
05 | ❝ She's my girlfriend. ❞
06 | One Heck of a Roller-coaster
07 | ❝ Thank you. ❞
08 | ❝ I'm sorry. ❞
09 | Puppers
10 | Arcade Mirth
11 | The Past Hurts
12 | Influence
13 | Unfamiliarity
14 | Realization
16 | ❝ I Like You! ❞
17 | Salty Breeze
18 | Hold My Hand.
19 | Bummer
20 | Lying Artist
21 | Hazy Feelings
22 | Broken Bones
23 | Regrets
24 | All My Fault
25 | Overwhelming Changes
26 | Void And Perplexed
27 | Therapeutical Lilac Skies
28 | Lost Memories
29 | Reasons Behind Actions
30 | Unprepared Torment
31 | Eighteen
32 | Feelings Makes Us Human
Epilogue
Author's Note

15 | Real

2.7K 181 238
By -netha

Hayden

"Hayden, stop playing with your food," Mom warned me for the second time today.

It was dinnertime, and my family was seated around the polished, wooden table--Mom and the step-dad at either end of the table while I sat facing my sister, Heather.

I scoffed. "I literally told you I have no appetite, but you still forced me to sit at the table. To act as a 'family.'"

"We are a family!" Mom insisted, narrowing her eyes at me.

"Yeah, right. You keep telling yourself that, but we both know that's not true."

The step-dad cleared his throat and calmly set the metal fork and knife on his plate, silencing us both.

"I understand that you don't like me, and I can never replace your dad. But that is no way to speak to your mother, Hayden," he spoke slowly, his voice deep and low.

I glared at him. "Don't speak about my dad with that mouth," I said between gritted teeth.

"Hayden, stop," Heather whispered to me, her eyes flickering around in fear. Fear that yet another loud fight would begin.

"Don't try to stop me, Heather!" I shook my head at her.

"Hayden Donovan!" Mom was almost yelling, "That's enough."

I rolled my eyes and scoffed again. "I'm done with this."

Rising from my chair, I stomped to my room, slamming the door shut behind me. I snatched my controller and was busy playing Overwatch when my phone beeped with a notification.

It was from an unknown number.

Unknown number

Hayden, hi.

It's Chloe.

I sat upright on my bed, going over the text.

Why is she texting me all of a sudden?

Hayden

Oh, hey, Chloe.

Chloe

Are you free tomorrow?

Hayden

Yeah, why?

Chloe

Up for coffee then?

I stilled, rereading the message, unsure of how to respond.

She had never asked me out for coffee.

Hayden

Sure.
Is everything alright?

Chloe

Oh, yeah. I just wanted to meet up with you.

Well, that's weird. Did something happen between Chris and her?

Hayden

Where should we meet?

Chloe

Andersons' is fine.

At ten in the morning?
Before my shift starts.

Hayden

Okay.

I was confused as to why Chloe wanted to meet me so abruptly. It felt like something was bothering her.

Shaking my head, I opened my laptop to find a good movie to watch--I suddenly didn't feel like playing the game now. The video clip of Kiara, from the day she came to my place, caught my eyes. I double-clicked on the touchpad, opening it.

As the video played, I couldn't help smiling at how cute she was. The way she was blushing profusely at the end of it when she exclaimed, 'optimism wins.'

There was something that kept drawing me to her, which was why I confessed to Rose that I feel differently around her, that I was starting to like her, maybe a little more than a friend. I always seemed to forget about the awful stuff going on at home when I was with her.

She's adorable and kind, caring too--she proved it the day she hugged me. Her hug instantly made me feel warmer and much better. She's extraordinary, and the way her mind works is interesting--the way she prefers to be alone than to be surrounded. She didn't crave for attention; instead, she craved validation.

I had a time like that too. Where I had no confidence, where I didn't trust others enough, heck, I still sometimes felt that way. Maybe that was why I wanted to show her. Show her a much more pleasant world, a world she would never get hurt.

I wanted to protect her.

●●●

I arrived at Andersons' a little past ten. The place had only two customers--they were probably stopping by for a small snack on their way to work.

I was thrilled to meet with Chloe. She was my high school crush, after all, and she still looked exactly the same. It was like nothing had changed—he same old popular girl. The one who had all the boys hooked. The one who didn't choose me.

I shook my head furiously, trying to shake off the disturbing thoughts of the past.

"Glad you could make it." Chloe beamed as she placed two mugs of steaming coffee on the table.

"No problem, but why did you want to meet up suddenly?" I asked, my eyes on Chloe as I blew on the warm coffee to cool it down.

She gave me a tight smile, shaking her head. "Nothing special, just to . . . talk."

My eyebrows furrowed. "Chloe, what's wrong?"

She looked down at her coffee and sighed, her fingers gripping the mug tight.

"Chris and I broke up."

I froze upon hearing her words.

"Why?"

She raised her head, tears beginning to brim her eyes. "He cheated."

"What?!"

I can't believe this! I warned him not to hurt her.

"How dare he!" I was getting madder by the second.

"And . . . he told me something. Something that keeps getting stuck in my head," Chloe mumbled as she dabbed at her tears with a tissue.

I watched her intently, waiting for her to continue.

"He said that I should go to you."

I was at a loss for words. I didn't know how to react.

Oh, my God.

She resumed, "And I was so confused, I mean, obviously you don't still like me back, do you? You have a girlfriend!"

Where is this conversation going?

"And I asked her. I asked Kiara. Whether you still like me. And she admitted that you had a crush on me for two years. Hayden, is it true? Chris said the same, but I didn't want to believe him. That's why I asked Kiara."

"Kiara knew that you and Chris broke up?!" I almost screamed.

I can't believe this! Kiara knew about it, and she never thought to tell me?

Chloe waved her hands in front of her frantically, her eyes wide in panic. "No, no! I mean, yes, but I was the one who told her to hide it from you."

Huh?

I frowned. "Why?"

Chloe tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before uttering, "Because of our past. I chose Chris over you, and now he's cheated on me. I was too embarrassed."

Why did she have to remind me of the past now?

That's when an irritating thought grew in my mind. I tried to push it back, but I couldn't hold it in much longer, so I asked, "But you knew Kiara was my girlfriend, and you asked her questions about how I feel about you?" I questioned, eyeing her suspiciously.

Chloe blinked at me in confusion as I waited for her to answer.

Finally, she started, "I-I was too curious. I wanted to know if you still--"

"Why?" I cut her off. "Do you like me?"

She hesitated, "Huh?"

"Do you like me?"

I watched as her eyes darted around, trying to avoid my gaze.

After what felt like ages, she stuttered, "I-I do."

And that's when I saw Chloe for what she truly was. All the brief whispers of feelings I had for her slowly withered away. I was wrong. She had changed. She had become selfish. She wasn't like her. She wasn't like the Chloe I knew.

"So, I'm just a backup for you?" I asked, my voice low.

Her head whipped up in shock. "What? I-I didn't say that!"

"Well, that's what it sounded like," I muttered as I leaned back in my chair. "You just broke up with Chris. But, it seems to me like you're already searching for someone to replace him."

"No! No, Hayden, that wasn't--"

Whoa, that hurts, knowing that you're just another backup.

"Bye, Chloe. Thanks for the coffee."

I pulled out a five-dollar note and placed it on the table. "Keep the change." With that, I stood up from the chair and strode off towards the glass doors of Andersons'.

I couldn't believe I never saw this side of Chloe; a bitter side.

Sure, Kiara and I weren't really a couple, but Chloe didn't know that. It was an arrogant move, what she did.

It made me think of how unusual Kiara was. My thoughts were going all around, and soon enough, I was thinking of what it would be like to be her boyfriend. And this made me realize that my feelings for Kiara had intensified since the time I confessed them to Rose. I had my doubts, but now it was obvious.

My feelings for her were real.

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