I expected my transition from community college to UCLA, short distance to long distance relationships with my friends and boyfriend, and moving to a new city to be hard, but it was a bit more difficult than I imagined. I was making new friends, especially with the other transfer students on my floor, but I really missed my swim friends, especially Casey, and I wished she was here to help me deal with my first long distance relationship.
Other than missing my friends, my boyfriend, and being a little homesick, things were going pretty well. I made new friends on my floor and my roommate was actually pretty cool. I always heard horror stories about roommates at college, but she wasn't bad at all. I don't think that we would ever be great friends or anything like that, but she was nice and she was a good roommate. She was clean and always asked me if it was okay if her boyfriend stayed the night. Her boyfriend came around pretty often, usually about once a week. It was really sweet of him and they were pretty cute together, but seeing them together all the time made me miss Colin that much more.
In order to keep my mind off of how much I missed Colin, I decided to join a club, specifically the girls water polo club team. I played in middle school, high school, and community college and thought that it would be nice to get back into something that I loved so much. During the first week of school there was an event called club rush. During club rush, all of the clubs set up a booth and have a sign up sheet to gather more members. I went directly to the girls water polo table to sign up and talk to a few of the girls on the team. They told me the play by play of how it worked. We would practice three times a week and have a tournament every other week during the fall quarter. Club water polo wasn't in season during the winter and spring quarters, but there was still practice once a week and the girls and boys liked to hang out at night and have parties on the weekends. I could not be more excited. It sounded exactly like water polo and swim at community college, so I was definitely in. Plus the girls that I talked to seemed really nice and laid back, just like me. I was sure that this would be the perfect fit for me. It would help me make some new friends and keep my mind off of Colin for a bit.
After a few weeks, I finally got settled in. I had classes Monday through Thursday, which gave me a three day weekend for water polo tournaments and to visit Colin or the girls whenever our schedules matched up. During the first month I didn't have time to visit anyone and no one had the time to visit me, but it was understandable. Everyone had to get used to their new school and new routine. Natalie and Casey also joined the club water polo team, so I knew I would run into them at tournaments. Aria decided to go for a sorority, which was pretty time consuming from what she told me, so I would probably have to wait to see her until a break. Colin also joined his school's club water polo team, so I was hoping that he would have a tournament at UCLA so I could watch and we would have an excuse to see each other.
During the fall quarter I really wanted to focus on water polo. This was something that I loved and I couldn't wait to get back into. Although I would say that I have a laid back personality, I am extremely competitive when it comes to sports and I play to win. I made it a point to never miss a practice and to be ready for all tournaments, so even though I was in college and there were parties every night, I decided that I would not drink the night before a game and try to get to sleep early.
Throughout September and October, I was focused on getting ready for our first tournament that was going to be at UCSB the weekend before Halloween. There were a solid number of teams, and I just so happened to be playing against UCSB and UCSD, which were the teams Casey and Natalie were on. They were still my best friends, but once I get in the water I will play full force against anyone, friend or not.
That morning my team got a van and started to head over to Santa Barbara. Once we got there, I quickly spotted both Natalie and Casey and ran over to meet with them. We were so excited to see each other considering we haven't been together since summer.
"Guys!! I have missed you so much! How have you been?" I asked, wanting to know every detail. I have heard most of it from our almost daily FaceTime conversations, but it was different in person.
"I've been good, just focusing on school and water polo, trying to find a weekend to visit Brett. I miss him so much and we haven't been in contact as much as I had hoped we would be," Casey said, clearly disappointed.
"I'm sure its just hard to find the time with different schedules. He loves you and we all know it. he wouldn't have stayed with you if he didn't," I said back, trying to comfort her. That seemed to cheer her up a bit.
"I've been doing pretty much the same as you guys! I do have my eye on a guy on the boys club water polo team, but I don't wanna say much. Nothing has happened and I don't want to jinx it," Natalie explained.
"Aww fine. I gotta get changed for my game so I'll see you guys in the water once we play each other!" I exclaimed, extremely excited to show them that my skills were still there and I was ready to compete.
The first day of the tournament went really well. We won both games and I scored twice in each of them. I played against Natalie in the first one and Casey in the second one. Both games were pretty close, but UCLA was clearly the better team. Casey claimed that one of their best players wasn't there, but I wasn't buying it. We would see in the final tournament of the season. Once we got to the hotel, a few of the girls wanted to party and drink, but I wanted to talk to Colin and get some sleep. I hadn't heard from Colin much that week. He was busy with tests and homework and I was okay with it because I wanted to focus on getting my homework done before the tournament. I decided to message him because I hadn't heard from him all day.
Me: Heyyy
I waited an hour with no response. That was strange. But maybe he had practice or something. I still didn't fully have his routine down so that really could have been the case. So I started to get ready for bed and watched a little TV with the girls.
Another hour passed and I still didn't get a response. I could text him again, but I didn't want to nag him. I was sure there was a reason that he wasn't responding, so I decided to get some sleep.
I woke up early the next morning because we had a game at 8 and we had to be at the pool at 7:15. I checked my phone for a response from Colin. Nothing. What was going on? I understand that he could have been busy, but it's not normal for him to go to sleep without saying goodnight. But I didn't have time to deal with something like this. I was pissed for sure, but I had another two games to focus on for the day, so I decided that I would take my anger out in the games and make sure we won.
The game ended as well as it could have. We won by one, but I only scored once and I got in a bit of a fight with a girl on the other team. It wasn't punching or anything, but there was some grabbing and kicking involved and I felt myself getting worked up a little more easily than I'm used to. This whole Colin not texting me back thing was getting to me more than it should have. After I dried off and changed, I checked my phone to see if he finally responded.
Colin: Hey G! So sorry. I got out of practice late and then went to a water polo party. I must have missed your message. I'm so sorry.
Hmm. I didn't really know what to think of it. And I knew I wasn't ready to respond because I was still pretty angry. I had a game coming up in an hour so I was going to focus my attention on that and then I could respond to Colin later. I wanted to get first place in this tournament, so I got changed again and met up with the rest of team to get a quick pep talk in before we warmed up.
That was by far the closest game I have ever played in by far. Each quarter was tied or a team was up by only one. Throughout the entire game, the biggest lead by either team was on two points. After the fourth quarter, the game was tied so we had to go into overtime. In the end, our goalie made an amazing block and was able to quickly pass the ball to a girl on the counter attack all the way down the pool. With one fake to get herself into a better shooting position, she ended the game with a cross-cage skip and won us the game! My team was so excited to have been the winners of the first tournament of the year and this gave us the push to want to train harder for our upcoming tournaments later on in the semester.
Once the excitement from the win started to fade away, I figured that I should respond to Colin. I had a two hour drive back to school, which I was sure would be enough time to solve our small problem. I was pretty mad and I wasn't going to let him off the hook, but I wasn't going to make it a huge deal.
Me: How was the party?
Colin: G I'm really sorry. It won't happen again.
Me: You realize that this was my first tournament at UCLA and all I wanted to do was talk to you about it? Not worry about what you're doing and if you're okay.
Colin: I know, I'm so sorry. I got so caught up with being with the guys that I completely forgot to check my phone. I swear you have nothing to worry about. I should have checked in with you and I'm so sorry Gigi.
Me: I'm glad that you're having fun with the guys, just don't forget about me okay?
Colin: I promise that I won't forget about you. Please don't worry about that. I've been talking about you to them 24/7. They are so excited to meet you next weekend for Halloween and I can't wait to see you.
Me: I'm excited too. What are we going to dress up as?
Colin: Hmm, we will need to brainstorm this week. But we can worry about that later. I want you to tell me all about the tournament and how amazing you did!
The following weekend I flew to Berkeley to visit Colin. There were going to be a ton of Halloween parties that weekend, so our first task was to figure out what our costume was going to be. After some collaboration, we decided on Bonnie and Clyde. It wasn't very original, but it was easy enough to make considering the party was the next night. Colin already had something he could wear, so we just had to buy a dress or skirt and shirt for me plus some fake guns from the party store.
After we got everything set for the Halloween party, Colin insisted on taking me out to dinner. We went to get sushi, our favorite of course, and then we went back to his dorm. I met his roommate, Adam, who also happened to be on his club water polo team. He seemed really nice, but he was definitely a big party animal and he talked a lot about girls that would be at the party that he wanted to try to talk to. It's not like that was a problem, but ever since Colin and I's miscommunication about him not responding because he was at a party, I was worried that Adam could potentially be a bad influence. But I'm not Colin's mom, I'm his girlfriend and I wanted him to have fun at school, so I bit my tongue.
The next day Colin, Adam, and I went to breakfast and got all of the Halloween plans settled. We decided that we would all get ready together at the dorm, then we would call a ride to take us to one of the houses that some of the polo guys lived at to pregame, and then we would walk to one of the parties that was close by. As the day went on, I got a bit nervous about the party. I wouldn't know anyone except for Colin and sort of Adam. I had a feeling that Adam would ditch us as soon as we got in to find girls, so I was hoping that Colin would never leave my side and he would introduce me to all of his friends. I mean, that is typically what a couple would do, stick together, so maybe I was getting nervous over nothing.
At about 8:00 the three of us started getting ready for the party. Colin put on a dress shirt, slacks, and a vest to portray Clyde. I found a long sleeve blouse and pencil skirt at a thrift store that seemed to work pretty well for Bonnie. Colin's water polo team was dressing up as the Globo Gym from the movie Dodgeball, so Adam threw on his purple shirt, sweatbands, and black short shorts. Colin had a few beers in his room, so the three of us each had one before we headed over to the pregame.
We walked over to the water polo house and knocked on the door. Another guy on the team opened it and let us in. Colin immediately went over to the big group of guys. It was a bit intimidating, mostly because I was the only girl in the whole house. I walked over behind him and he introduced me to the group. After introductions, we all started taking shots. I usually would put a bit more time between each shot, but I was nervous and I figured the alcohol would help. I took three shots of vodka and 10 minutes later I was feeling a lot more comfortable. The guys were nice for the most part and actually engaged in conversation. One of his teammates, Connor, asked me a few questions about my life.
"So, Gianna right?" he asked.
"Yeah Gianna, but a lot of people call me Gigi," I said.
"Gigi. I like that. So where do you go to school?"
"I just transferred to UCLA this year. I've been playing on the club water polo team there," I said.
"Wow UCLA! That's great! And water polo too? You and Colin sound like a great match," Connor stated.
"Haha I would like to think so. It has worked out well so far," I responded.
"I'm sure it will work out. He has brought you up a few times. He wouldn't have told us about you if he didn't care," Connor said.
That made me feel a lot better. I'm not super confident and I was a bit worried that he would find someone he liked better at school, but if he has mentioned me to his friends, I was sure that he cared. I decided to let my worries leave my head and just have fun for the night.
After about an hour we left the pregame and went to the party. When we walked in, it was already crowded. There were a bunch of guys of girls in costume and it looked crazier than any party I've ever been to. The water polo guys from the pregame, Colin, and I walked toward the living room and met up with the rest of the guys on the team plus the girls water polo team. This time Colin didn't introduce me. Maybe he was already pretty drunk or there was too big of a crowd, but either way I was a bit bummed. I decided to shrug it off because I didn't want to cause a scene over something so small. One of the guys offered Colin and I each another beer and I gladly accepted. I was pretty tipsy but I needed to be drunk to feel comfortable in this environment. This is not the type of scene I was used to at all, but I wanted to stick it out for Colin.
"Hey Gigi, I'm gonna head to the bathroom real quick. I'll be right back," Colin said.
"Sounds good, I'll be right here," I replied.
I waited a few minutes and didn't see him come back. Maybe he ran into someone he knew or maybe he went to get another drink. I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. While I waited, one of the girls from the water polo team asked me if I wanted to be her partner in a game of beer pong, so I decided to play and that I would keep an eye out for Colin.
The girl ended up being really sweet. Her name was Maddie and she was also a transfer student from a community college, but she was from the Bay Area. We were beer pong partners for what seemed like an hour at least. We kept winning, beating tons of guy teams. It was such an awesome feeling being the house champs, but I still hadn't seen Colin and that put a damper on things.
"Do you know Colin? One of the transfer students on the water polo team? Tall, blonde hair, brown eyes?" I asked Maddie.
"Oh yeah for sure. What about him?" Maddie responded.
"Well, he's my boyfriend. I flew up to visit him this weekend and I was supposed to be hanging out with him here, but I haven't seen him. I'm gonna go look around and see if I can find him," I said.
"I'll come with," Maddie said.
We both started to walk around the house. I looked in the kitchen and the front room but he wasn't there. Then we checked upstairs. Still couldn't find him. Maddie suggested that we go to the backyard. As soon as I walked outside, I spotted him. He was with another girl, leaning against the house, sipping on another drink.
What the fuck? I flew all the way up here to hang out with him and he was really going to ditch me for another girl? At this point I was furious and nothing was going to calm me down. I was over this party and I was ready to go back to the dorms. The only problem was that I was staying with Colin and he had the key. I wasn't interested in talking to him, so I asked Maddie if I could stay with her.
"Maddie I am seriously so pissed off right now. Any chance I can stay at your place with the other girls?" I asked.
"Of course! Do you want to tell Colin that you're leaving?" Maddie asked.
"Nope, I'm good. Let's just head out."
We walked back with the other girls to her place. I never would have asked to stay with someone I had just met, but I was drunk and mad and there was no way that I was staying with Colin. When we got inside, Maddie gave me some of her pajamas and I laid down on the couch. Nothing was going to fix my mood and I didn't want to hear a word from Colin, so I turned off my phone. This probably wasn't the best idea, but I didn't care. A few minutes later, I fell asleep.
I woke up the next morning to about 20 missed calls and 30 messages from Colin.
Colin: Where are you?
Colin: Hello???
Colin: Gigi answer me.
Colin: Call me when you get this.
I figured that I had to call him back because I needed to get my stuff from his room so I could fly back to LA and I should probably hear what he has to say.
"Hey Colin. I'm coming back to the room. I'll be there in 10."
"Gigi, why did you wait to call me back until the morning? I was so worried about you."
I hung up.
I made it back to the dorm and knocked on the door. Colin answered and let me in right away.
"Gigi please tell me what happened. I don't know what I did wrong," he begged.
"Colin seriously don't play dumb with me right now. You ditched me at the party for another girl. I flew all this way and you really did that to me?" I shouted at him.
"Please Gianna I swear this whole thing is a misunderstanding. I ran into a girl from one of my classes. I didn't realize how much time had passed. Please understand."
Was this whole thing just one big misunderstanding? I'm not sure if I'm buying it. Either way, I flew up to be with him and he made it seem like he couldn't care less. I don't care if it was just some girl from class. He left me alone with a ton of people I didn't know when we were supposed to be spending time together for the first time in two months.
"You were supposed to be spending time with me. I understand that it was just a girl from class, but I haven't seen you in months. You should have been more excited to be with me," I tried to explain.
"You're right and I am so sorry. It won't happen again. Please believe me," he said.
"Can you please just take me to the airport? I don't want to miss my flight," I said.
"Sure," Colin responded, visibly upset.
He dropped me off and I kissed him goodbye.
"I forgive you, Colin. But next time try to understand how this sort of thing would make me feel," I said.
"I will, Gigi. I swear."
I didn't want to end things on a bad note, but I was still mad. And I wasn't going to forget about this so easily.
The rest of the quarter went by pretty quickly. I was focused on school and water polo and made those my main priorities. My team won the final water polo tournament, so we got first place in our conference. It was such an amazing feeling and I was so happy that I put so much time and energy into the sport that I grew up playing. Aside from water polo, I ended the quarter with all A's and B's. Overall, I was extremely happy with my first quarter of college and I couldn't wait to go back in January. The one thing I needed to focus on during winter break was my friends and my relationship with Colin. We had been in a weird space ever since the party, but I think that some time together would make things better and repair any damage that had been caused throughout the past few months.