"Sir, did you know your girlfriend had narcolepsy?"
I shake my head. I don't even know what it means. I've been chatting with the nurse telling her Evie's name and answering questions as best I can.
"Have you contacted family?" She asks. I wince. In all the chaos I'd forgotten to call Brandon.
"I'll do it now." I choke out.
I text Brandon, I know he'll see it. I can't bear to be in the sterile waiting room. They took her in for goddamn surgery because her entire bone is out of place. Surely she won't die, but it itches me wrong that she didn't tell me about her... narcolepsy?
I sit and bounce my leg, pulling up safari and searching narcolepsy.
I don't know what I expected to find, but not what I did. In my struggle to understand words fly at me.
Psychosomatic
Insomnia
Epinephrine
Spontaneous sleeping
Fatigue
I don't want to believe it. Evie has never let on that she was suffering from the numerous symptoms I see on the webpage. But then the pictures with her friends at the hospital. Mia's insistence that it was my fault that first time. The strange pills she takes all the time. Brandon's reaction to our first kiss. Evie not wanting to be responsible for Audrey Rose.
Suddenly I feel like such an idiot. Everyone knows. Maybe not Sam and Asher, but everyone else knew. She told them not to tell me, why else would it never come up? She lied, and for what? Did she really think I would see her any differently or that I would love her less.
The words burn on my tongue. I can't love her. I can't trust her. I could never bring her to a fight now, I shouldn't have taken her to see my mom. Brandon always tried to keep us from doing crazy things because he knew.
But then... these pages all say that medicine helps, but that over time it's best to just give in. The only safety risk is injuries from the falls, but other than that narcoleptics should be falling asleep several times a week.
Until today I've never seen Evie fall asleep like that. And I'm with her all the time. I stand and start moving away from the waiting room. I can't stay here.
A knife twists in my chest, but I can't face her.
She lied.
***
Evie POV
This is not Somerset general. I know that immediately because the telltale sign of any army is it noticeable and there's a different generic print on the wall than at SGH.
If that weren't enough there's a single woman sitting by my bedside with a patient smile on her face.
"Hi Evie, you gave your boyfriend quite a scare. Your right arm is broken but we managed to set it properly. How are you feeling?"
I don't know what to say. This is all very new. "I don't understand, where are the journalists and researchers?"
"We don't do that here." She laughs. "You are a person not a lab rat. I'm Doctor Jamie Vaughn."
"I'm ..." I don't finish the sentence, she knows who I am. "Where is my mom?"
"She should be on her way." Doctor Vaughn hesitates. "I was hoping to speak with you before she gets here though."
My eyes widen a bit. I don't say anything and she must take that to mean go on.
"When we tried to access your files they were zipped quite tightly. We are aware of your narcolepsy, but I don't believe you've been properly informed of your condition. "
What's that supposed to mean? I live my condition, I think I know what's up.
"You've been on some very heavy stuff, narcoleptics aren't meant to resist so much to the sleep spells. "
"What do you mean?" I'm genuinely confused now. "My mom says it's best to have as few attacks as possible."
"Of course that would be ideal, but it's not realistic. I'm telling you that 'attacks' as you call them, are normal. They're just sleep spells and nothing to be afraid of. I'm an expert on psychosomatic disorders, I've treated two other narcoleptics in my time and it's simply a fact, it's best not to resist ."
"But my condition is dangerous. People could take advantage of that if they knew." I mutter. That's what my mom always said.
"That's simply not true. Your disorder is nothing to be ashamed of, in most cases it takes the strain off of your personal relationships to be truthful. Your poor boyfriend was as white as a ghost when the nurse asked him if he knew."
"Oh no, Liam." I groan. "I haven't told him yet."
Doctor Vaughn smiles and offers advice. "It's those closest to you will be the key to happiness with this disorder. You're 16 almost 17. You have control over your own medical choices now. "
"My mom says I don't until I'm 18." I mumble confused.
"Another falsehood. Evie, I'd like to treat you here at Saint Anne's. It seems you've been taught several wrong things about your condition."
"I don't know ..." My head is hurting from this information overload. Inside I'm giddy at some of her words though.
"It's your choice, Evie. If you take anything away from your stay here I want you to know: narcoleptics are meant to have sleep spells; Don't fight them."
She gives me one last knowing smile and lets me be. I'm meant to have... sleep spells? Mom always said they were bad.
I think back to Sam's party. I had a sleep spell, I was so surprised at seeing Sam and Ollie together. I was fine afterwards though. I didn't need my EpiPen to be woken up immediately because I woke up when I needed to.
For so long I've lived afraid of my next spell, but Dr. Vaughn is saying I don't need to be. That it's normal. My disorder doesn't make me any different from anyone else, I'm just prone to spontaneous napping. I don't need to be taking pills or salts to school. I just need friends around me to help when I have spells and keep me from dangerous situations.
Why would my mom lie about that?
I can't even think about Liam, though I know he must feel terrible right now and I feel bad for putting him in that position. But my world just changed, became a clearer picture. I'm not different. I can have Liam and my friends and a normal school year.
If he can ever forgive me that is.
THE END