"Dinner is ready, everyone!" Karolin called. Zach and I exchanged glances before rising slowly from our seats. Claudia's other sister and husband had arrived soon after Ginger so that meant there were eleven of us sitting at the kitchen table to eat. The kitchen was a decent size, but it was definitely going to be a bit crammed. Since I hadn't gotten to eat much earlier in the day, I was finally starving.
We both entered the kitchen to see everyone was getting seated. Claudia's family was very informal with how they set up Christmas dinner, and I liked it. We got to choose our seats, where in many German households your seats are chosen for you. I was unsure of where to sit, so I hesitantly sat next to Zach. I glanced around awkwardly and soon everyone was comfortable. I was sitting in between Zach and Claudia, and across from Karolin and Engel.
Very little time passed when I heard Deron's deep voice speaking to Claudia, followed by Zach tensing almost immediately. I looked over at him with a frown to see he was glaring at his plate, his hands clenched into fists. The soft talking continued for a moment before he turned in his seat and made a conscious effort to scowl at his father. I had no idea what they were saying, but I knew it was bad.
"All I am saying, dear, is it might be better for them not to sit so close to each other," Deron said in a normal tone. My heart seemed to skip of a beat. Is he serious... is he really going to do this now?
"Deron, nein!" Claudia hissed urgently under her breath.
"What is the problem, Deron?" Karolin asked innocently.
"Oh, nothing! I just do not think it is such a good idea to have Zachary and Dylan sitting next to each other," He said light heartedly. She laughed slightly.
"Oh... and why is that?" She asked. Please, no!
"Ach, I nearly forgot! Nobody knows! Silly me!" Deron laughed, sounding like a complete asshole. "Zachary and Dylan are, in fact-"
"Deron!" Claudia yelled, but it was too late.
"-a couple!" He finished, looking very pleased with himself. There was a very awkward silence.
"What?" Karolin asked slowly, looking at us both. Engel was giving us both a very disgusted look, and I had to avert my gaze from everyone. I hunched my shoulders and tried to ignore everyone's burning stares.
"Oh, yes! They are together! They are, how do you say, involved with each other-"
"Stop it!" Claudia growled at her husband.
"What?" He asked. "There is nothing wrong with it!" Oh my god... I cleared my throat awkwardly and heard a chair creak. Someone had gotten up to leave the tense situation. I glanced at Zach to see he had turned forward in his seat once more, his jaw clenched, his hands in fists on the table. He looked furious.
"Was?" Ginger asked, seeming more confused than anyone.
"Nein, Deron!" Claudia seemed desperate and they went into a fit of German arguing. I felt uncomfortable not knowing what they were saying, but everyone was still looking at Zach and I strangely.
"Well, whatever makes you happy," Karolin said. She was trying to sound indifferent, but I could hear her voice shake as she spoke. My heart was pounding so fast, I could barely hear anything but it. I was surprised Zach hadn't spoken yet.
"Yes, there is nothing wrong with- a man... who is basically his brother- getting into a relationship with a teenage, minor no less, ado-"
"Fuck you, Deron!" Zach suddenly exploded and stood up. "You SHUT THE FUCK UP!"
"Do not tell me to shut up, Zachary!" He yelled right back. "And certainly NEVER say the fuck word to me!"
"I will say whatever I want to, you piece of shit! My personal life is nothing of your worry! I am a grown man; I can do as I please!" He had moved closer to his dad, who had also stood.
"I think it is, Zach, considering you are illegally having sex with my underage, adopted son!" I bit my bottom lip and closed my eyes tightly as he spoke.
"FUCK YOU! How dare you disgrace me in front of everyone!" He yelled and started walking away. "Fick dich, Deron! I did not need you then, I DO NOT NEED YOU NOW!" He yelled louder as he got farther away.
"Ach, but you would need me, you little shit!" He yelled after his son. "Fuck!" He cursed and threw something on the table. I finally looked over to see Claudia had her face buried in her hands, her forehead resting on the edge of the table. Everyone else seemed like deers caught in headlights. No one said anything. No one moved. They all just stared, shocked. I was shocked as well, and incredibly embarrassed.
I could no longer take it. I stood up quietly and walked away from the scene, my body very tense. I was relieved when I made it to the bedroom without anyone saying anything. That was the worst thing I had ever experienced... ever.
Zach was standing by the window, his back facing me, one hand on his hip and the other clutching onto his hair. "Zach...," I said weakly, slightly scared for his response.
"WHAT!?" He yelled and turned around, glaring at me. I had expected that response, but it still frightened me. I swallowed roughly and he sighed. "Sorry," He said through grit teeth. He rubbed his eyes roughly before walking over to me. He put an arm around and pulled me close. I breathed a sigh of relief to have him on me, but all too quickly it was over. He walked across the room again.
I could hear yelling coming from the kitchen, and it made me feel horrible. It sounded as though not only had Claudia gotten involved, but everyone had. There was so much guilt running through me I could hardly bare it. "I'm sorry," I apologized before I could stop myself.
"Shut up!" He snarled, hostility thick in his voice. I was taken aback by his response. "It is not your fault that my vater is a fuck face!" He shook his head quickly and grabbed his sweatshirt and hat. He put them both on quickly.
"Where are you going?" I asked as I realized he was leaving.
"I am going for a walk... I will be back," He said and exited the room without another word.
"Where are you going?" I heard Deron ask loudly.
"Fuck off!" Zach yelled followed by the front door slamming. The family called his name in vain. I sighed deeply and laid down on the bed. I buried my face in the pillow and screamed. I was so fucked...
Soon after I laid there, I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I kept replaying the words over and over in my head. I felt so humiliated... and it hadn't helped that Zach ran out like that without saying much to me or comforting me. I understood why, though. He was furious.
I was startled by the door opening. I looked up and was surprised to see Claudia walking in. She shut the door behind her and came to sit next to me. She looked miserable, which just added to my distress. "Hey," I greeted sadly. "I'm so sorry," I whimpered.
"Darling, there is nothing you can do about it," She reassured me, rubbing my back. "It was not in your control..."
"What wasn't?" I asked, sniffing. There was a pause.
"Any of it," She began, staring at the floor. "I know that you did not choose to have an attraction for Zach. These things just happen... and it also was not your fault for Deron's inappropriate behaviour." She sighed.
"I know, but I still feel bad! I wish that I didn't have to feel this way, Claud! I really do. It would make things so much easier...," I admitted and wiped my eyes. She grinned sadly.
"I do not blame you, my dear. I hope you know that...," She said and leaned in to give me a hug. "I do not accept your relationship to the fullest, but I am trying."
"You don't need to try, Claud. I know what we're doing is wrong," I told her, wrapping my arms around her in return.
"Yes... but neither of you can help it. That is something I understand that Deron does not, and I do not believe he ever will," She said quietly. Then there was silence for a few moments. "Now I am not forcing you, but it would be very nice if you could come back to the dinner table." The thought of going back to the table made me feel incredibly nervous.
"I guess I could," I told her as we separated. She smiled at me once more.
"Okay... Come out when you are ready. I should be getting back." Claudia stood up. "Are you okay?" She asked. I nodded with a forced grin. "Good." With that she turned and left. How was I supposed to confront any of them now?
I waited in the room for about twenty more minutes before I found it in me to go back to the table. Once I arrived I received sad smiles from the ones who cared, and absolutely no looks from the others. I sat there and listened to everyone try to make small talk awkwardly. I knew what they really wanted to be talking about, though. I couldn't eat anything, though I had been so hungry earlier. I just sat there drowning in my own thoughts.
<<>>
I stared into the darkness, wanting nothing more than to get out of bed and lay with Zach. I needed him. There was no way in hell I was going to be able to fall asleep that night without him pressed up against me. I sighed deeply and rolled over, looking at Abby's bed. She appeared to be fast asleep, so maybe I could get up and lay with him... at least for a little.
I suddenly heard Deron's loud, deep voice from somewhere in the house. They were arguing in German, and they had been for a long time. I was glad I couldn't understand them. I usually wanted to hear what was being said, but not tonight.
Sadness panged in my stomach as I heard Zach sigh and roll over. I longed for his comforting touch. Fuck it! I got out of bed quietly, careful not to wake Abby, and kneeled down where he was laying. "Can I sleep with you?" I asked quietly, knowing he was awake.
"I thought you would never ask," He said dully and rolled over to face me. I smiled to myself and laid down next to him on the hard, uncomfortable ground. I sighed shakily and kissed his chest before resting my head down. "Are you okay?" He asked me softly. I nodded and swallowed, still feeling like shit. "You are being a bit... clingy..." I hadn't noticed until he said something that I was holding onto him tightly, my nails digging into his back slightly.
"Sorry," I apologized and released him, simply letting my hand rest on his waist. We laid there like that for a couple minutes when there was a sudden loud burst of yelling, which caused me to lift my head. I looked over to see Zach frowning. He shook his head and gently put my head back onto his chest. After a few minutes I rolled over so that I was on my back more and sighed. I was well aware that his eyes were on me and he began to lightly run his fingers over my stomach. I grinned and closed my eyes, enjoying the feeling. He then moved his hand under my shirt, his nails gently scraping over my skin.
"Take off your shirt...," He said quietly into my ear. I sat up briefly to slip my shirt over my head. I tossed it to the side and laid back down. He smiled and leaned over me, his lips pressing against the skin on my stomach. I laughed slightly from the feeling as he trailed his kisses up my chest. He sat up again and smiled. "You are so beautiful," He said softly.
"So are you," I told him with a smile. Zach shook his head before leaning down to kiss my lips. I kissed him back, gently sliding my tongue into his mouth. He moved his hand to my jaw bone and rubbed his thumb over my skin. It felt good. All of it. I needed his touch so bad. We kissed deeper, and then he suddenly pulled away. I watched as he moved so that he was straddling me at my hips, and leaned down to kiss my neck. I already had a hard on. I let my hands rest on his thighs and took a deep breath in as he began to kiss me harder. I literally felt like I could have come in my pants, which would have been embarrassing as fuck.
Zach kissed my lips again, harsher than before but I was much willing for the change. His hands rubbed up and down my stomach, my grip on his thighs tightened. His teeth grazed over my bottom lip as he moved away from me. "Can we fuck?" He asked very quietly. I nodded without hesitation.
"Yes," I breathed and began to pull his shirt over his head. He finished it for me and kissed my neck quickly before undoing his pants. I did the same thing with mine, and he got off of me so I could slide them off completely. I was so ready to get him inside me.
I was naked first, and felt slightly exposed. Once he was ready, he moved between my legs. "I love you," I whispered as he leaned down to kiss my neck once more.
"I love you, too," He said back and kissed my cheek. "Ready?" I nodded and grit my teeth. Even though I was unbearably horny, it would still hurt going in. I closed my eyes and grimaced as I felt the familiar pain in my ass, mixed with the feeling of having to shit. Actually... it kinda felt more like you had to shit when it was coming out than in. Ew.
Zach let out a deep breath and glanced over at Abby before he leaned down and began to fuck me quietly. I let my head rest against his shoulder and decided to jack myself off. I was much too turned on not to. It felt so good to finally be having sex, especially with the adrenaline that anyone could walk in on us at any moment. I was pleasantly surprised when Zach put his hand over mine and started to do it for me. We had never done anything like that, and I really enjoyed it. His other hand gripped tightly onto my hip, his nails digging in so deep that it stung. We were both trying to keep our breathing under control, but I had to admit it was tough!
Eventually, almost too soon, I came onto his stomach. Shortly after that he came as well. We both stayed in the same position for a little bit before he pulled out. Yuck, I hated that feeling. "Fuck," He hissed and glanced around. "Can I use your shirt?" He asked. I groaned, not too fond of the idea of using my clothing as a come rag. I actually cared about the well being of my shirts.
"Why not yours?" I asked.
"Because I like it!" He insisted, and it was too late to protest more because he had it wrapped around his dick as he spoke. God dammit! He wiped his stomach carefully and threw it at me, moving to put his clothes back on. I glanced at Abby to see she was still in the same position before cleaning myself off. I simply threw the shirt towards my bag, deciding to move it in the morning. I sat up and grabbed my pants, and then slipped them on. Once that was done I felt rather gross. My ass was burning, but I felt satisfied. I laid down again and waited for Zach to be done doing whatever the fuck he was!
Eventually he laid down as well. "Should you not go back to your bed?" He asked. That kind of upset me.
"Not unless you're coming with me," I replied which made him laugh quietly. He wrapped his arms around me from behind and kissed my cheek.
"I feel better now," He told me softly, burying his face in the back of my neck. I grinned to myself.
"Me too." I closed my eyes. I really did. There was no longer any sexual frustration between us. At least for now.
"I love you, Dylan. Do not ever let Deron get to you," He said quietly. I nodded,
"I won't. I love you too much for that," I assured him with a grin. He kissed my neck and pulled me closer.
"I am glad," He said, sounding happy compared to earlier. I was definitely feeling better, too. I put my hand over his and sighed, finally feeling content enough to fall asleep. I tried not to think about anything, and eventually I did go to sleep. I wasn't even worried about what the next day had in store for me.
<<>>
I smashed the last of my cigarette into the concrete by my feet and ,when I was done with that, stepped on it. I let out my final drag and picked up the remaining filter before flicking it off the path and into the small yard. I tried to be nice at least... After a moment of staring ahead I stood up and walked back inside. I walked into the living room and immediately noticed Claudia sitting on the couch, a mug in her hand, looking quite unhappy. After the fighting I'd heard the night before, I wouldn't have been surprised if Deron and her were getting divorced. I knew they wouldn't do that, though. They were too old fashioned in that sense. I walked forward with a small sigh and sat on the opposite couch from hers.
"Hello, Dylan," She said warmly with a small grin. I grinned back and nodded, looking awkwardly at my hands afterwards. It felt so weird to be around her now, let alone the rest of the family, and I wasn't looking forward to everyone's arrival from the grocery store... especially Deron.
I glanced over to see Zach enter the living room slowly, seeming tired still. "Mutter...," He said slowly and walked over to give her a hug. "I am sorry," He finally apologized for his actions and the whole ordeal most likely.
"Oh, no, Zach... It is fine. It was neither of your faults," She said reassuringly with a grin. He nodded and sat down next to his mother. "Now are your belongings packed and ready to go?" She asked, addressing both of us. We both nodded. "Okay. We are going to be leaving soon, so... Yes." She ran her fingers through her hair quickly and placed her mug down on the coffee table. I watched as she stood up and left the room.
Zach cleared his throat and then spoke, but I didn't really understand him. Fuck him and his growing accent!
"What?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. He frowned and shook his head.
"Are you okay?" He asked slower. His patience seemed to be very thin.
"Oh... yeah. I'm fine," I replied and let my hands rest in my lap in loose fists. "Are you okay?" I asked. He didn't move or say anything for a little. Then he shrugged.
"Not really, but I will be." It took a lot for Zach to admit his feelings. I knew one thing; I was actually ready to go home.