Omen
Few days after. I went back to the company to work. As usual I did my part. Dad and Tito went out to have an another errand with the Citigroup.
We were told to look after our company. I was inside my office the whole morning to check the updates and files.
"Gillian. Do you have the hard copy of Mr. Lincoln's file?" Sabi ko habang hindi pa rin inaalis ang tingin sa laptop.
"Yes Miss Wendy," aniya ng mailapag ang coffee sa table ko.
Agad siyang lumabas para kuhanin ang pinautos ko. Pinagpapatuloy pa rin ang ginagawa hanggang sa maramdaman ang pagbalik niya sa office.
"Thank you Gillian," I smiled politely at her before she nodded and went out of my office again.
I was stressing out hanggang sa napag-isipan na kumain na muna. Nagpadeliver na lang din ako dahil hindi ako pwedeng bumaba at marami pa akong tatapusin.
From: Rad
I just got home. Still working?
Napangiti ako sa gitna ng pag-iisip. Agad kong kinuha ang phone at nag reply sa kanya.
To: Rad
Yes. You should rest. Alam kong pagod ka.
I bit my lower lip. I'm just happy everytime his name pop out of my phone. Hindi ko alam pero agad na nawawala ang pagod ko kapag nakikita ang simpleng mensahe niya.
Or maybe it's just the urge of missing him. Sa mga nagdaang araw ay mas lalo ko lang na hinahanap ang presensya niya.
Naisip ko rin na malapit na pala ang anniversary namin. The thought of it makes me want to see him. We've been together for almost seven years!
Hindi pa rin makapaniwala. That we made it this far. I just hope that he's my end game. Dahil hindi ko kakayanin kapag hindi siya ang makakasama ko.
From: Rad
Yeah. I wish I could call you. Just don't stress that much at work. I love you.
I'm really into the plan. Balak ko talagang umuwi sa anniversary namin para e surprise siya. I just did not ask Dad about this but I will try.
I will find a way to have my schedule clear dahil gusto ko ako naman ang pupunta sa kanya.
Kaya naman. Buong maghapon kong tinapos ang gagawin. Sa susunod na araw pa uwi nila Dad. Kaya we were said to take in charge of everything.
Kinagabihan. Agad akong nagpasundo sa driver at sinalubong sina Mom ng makauwi. I kissed her cheek as I went inside the kitchen and saw her with Tita Carmona making a dinner.
"I'm glad you're here Wendy. We're making a dinner tonight!" Ani Tita.
I looked down to see them cooking. It was a roasted chicken and some garden salad. May mga dessert din kaya halos mamangha ako sa nakita.
"I felt hungry already," sabi ko habang pinagmamasdan ang pagkain.
They both chuckled at my statement.
"Don't worry, we're almost done sweety." ani Mom kaya ngumiti na lang ako.
"Alright. I'll just change first," sabi ko at agad silang tinalikuran.
Agad akong umakyat para maglinis at magpalit ng damit. I spent fifteen minutes inside the bathroom before I went out wearing new clothes.
Naabutan ko rin si Edmund sa hagdan na paakyat pa lang.
"You're early," I said.
"You're suspicious,"
I chuckled at his statement. Agad ko siyang nilagpasan at dumeretso na sa hapag. Nakita ko rin si Diane na nakapwesto na sa mesa.
"Where's En Mark?" I asked.
"He went to his friends. Sleep over thingy." aniya at nagkibitbalikat.
I nodded and sat in front of her.
"You think it's a good idea uniting our mothers again?" Rinig kong tanong ni Diane.
Nakatanaw siya ngayon sa kusina kung saan nagkakagulo si Mom at Tita Carmona.
"My goodness Lokia. I forgot to put some salt!" I heard Tita.
Agad naman akong napatawa sa narinig.
"Yeah I guess so. I miss how they struggle in the kitchen together," sambit ko.
Sabay kaming nagtawanan ni Diane sa naisip. We even started reminiscing about everything. Naalala 'yung mga kapalpakan nila Mom sa kusina noon with Tita Carmona.
It was funny. Para tuloy silang magkapatid na naligaw sa kusina.
I shrugged and leaned on my chair before we saw Edmund entering the room.
He's wearing a white V neck shirt and black shorts already. Mukhang kakaligo lang dahil medyo basa pa 'yung buhok.
"You're early? When did you went home?" Nagtatakang tanong ni Diane sa kapatid.
Hindi siguro napansin at nakita kanina ng umuwi. Edmund sat beside me as usual. Ngumiti ako sa kanya pero agad ding nabaling sa harap.
"Why do you care?"
Napataas ang kilay ko sa sinabi nito. He's being harsh with her sister again.
"I'm just asking. I thought you'll sleep with your girlfriend," ani Diane at ngumisi.
Trying to tease her brother. Agad naman akong napailing dahil sa ginagawa ng dalawa.
"She's my girlfriend. Not a wife Diane. Why don't you find yourself a man to shut your mouth?"
Harsh. Napangisi ako sa pagtatalo ng dalawa. Humalukipkip naman si Diane sa harap at napataas ang kilay sa sinabi ng kapatid.
"How dare you to betray me? I'm just asking!" Si Diane.
"Intruder then. Just answer one of your admirer," Edmund smirk at her sister.
"Perhaps, Alison? I heard you were dating," aniya.
"The hell did you get that information?!" Iritadong sambit ni Diane.
Edmund just shrugged his shoulder and continued teasing his sister.
"I just know," aniya at umiling.
Nawala ang asaran ng dalawa ng pumasok na si Mom at Tita sa hapag dala-dala ang mga pagkain.
"Let's eat!" Masayang pumalakpak si Tita habang pagod na umupo sa kanyang upuan.
"This looks good," I commented.
Umupo naman sa kanan ko si Mom at sa kaliwa si Edmund. Sa main seat naman umupo si Tita.
"Of course! We made a great team work with you mother," ani pa ni Tita at kinindatan ako.
Umiling na lang ako at ngumiti. We started eating without Tito and Dad. Sa susunod na araw pa kasi uuwi sina Dad so we have no choice but to eat without them.
"The food is great," sabi ko at bumaling kay Mom.
She was smiling at me. Mukhang napagod din sa ginawang pagluto kasama si Tita.
"Your mother suggested the food! She told me it was one of her best dish from the restaurant." ani Tita.
"You have a restaurant Tita?"
Tanong ni Edmund. Mukhang hindi ata alam.
"Yes hijo. You should try eating there when you visit the country," si Mom ng ngumiti.
"Mom. We should try visiting the Philippines," Diane convinced her mother.
"I will tell your Dad about that. I wanted to visit there as well! I miss the food we ate years ago Lokia. What was the name again?"
Kumunot noo si tita na para bang inaalala ang huli niyang kinain sa Pilipinas. Narinig ko ang mahinang tawa ni Mom at tumigil ng bahagya sa pagkain.
"Kwek-kwek. You like that food?" Si Mom ng binalingan si Tita.
"Yes! It was the orange ball with an egg inside right?"
I almost laugh at her statement. Well at least she likes the food there. At kwek-kwek pa talaga pumasok sa panlasa niya.
Pagkatapos naming kumain. I felt full kaya agad akong umakyat.
I went back to my room to watch some movie. Hinatid ko rin si Mom sa kanyang kwarto bago ako bumalik sa kwarto.
I decided to watch another episode tonight kaya agad ko rin itong pinagpatuloy. Nakasandal ako sa headboard ng kama habang nanonood.
Ngunit natigil lang ng biglang tumunog ang phone ko para sa isang video call. I automatically smiled as I saw him from the screen.
"Hey," I said.
Nakita ko ang pagngiti niya ng masagot ko ito. He's probably inside his condo. Umaga na sa kanila at mukhang papasok palang siya ng trabaho.
"Sorry. Matutulog ka na?" Aniya siguro ng makita ang unan sa tabi ko.
I shook my head and smiled at him.
"No. I was watching a movie. Aalis ka na?" Sabi ko.
"It's still early baby. I wanted to see you first," aniya.
"Well, you're seeing me now," I bit my lower lip to stop myself from smiling.
"Not enough though. I wanted to hug you"
"You're clingy again Rad. What's up with you." I chuckled.
"Why? Hindi mo ba gusto?"
Nakita ko ang pagkuha niya ng baso bago lumagok dito. It's probably his coffee.
"Gusto kita,"
I tried to stop myself from grinning. Narinig ko rin ang malakas niyang tawa sa kabilang linya kaya hindi ka na rin napigilan ang sarili kundi ang gayahin siya.
"You're teasing me again. You just like the idea of making me crazy for you,"
Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay. Aba kasalanan ko pa na nagpapadala siya? He's too sensitive. Kaya ang bilis matukso.
"Yeah. Effective nga diba," sabi ko.
Umiling ako at dumapa sa kama. I tried to fix my hair kaya nilapag ko muna ang phone. He was watching me while doing it. I heard him sighed.
"Malapit na ang anniversary natin," aniya at mapait na ngumiti.
"Yeah. We're that strong huh?" sabi ko.
I don't want to tell him about my plan. Gusto ko kasi na e surprise siya dito. But I have the feeling of he's doing the same thing.
Knowing Rad. Gagawa talaga 'yan ng paraan para mapasaya ako. It's either he'll surprise me a visit. Or I surprise him a visit.
Kaya medyo nahirapan ako. Kasi baka kapag umuwi ako ng Pilipinas ay baka pumunta rin siya dito. It'll complicate more kaya naisipan ko na mag book ng flight before hand. Para maunahan ko siya.
"Of course. You'll end up with me anyway," aniya kaya tinaasan ko siya ng kilay.
"So much of confidence now really?" I chuckled.
Tumango naman siya kaya napailing ako sa ginawa niya. He's just too futuristic. I haven't thought of it pa naman. But I really hope na siya nga 'yung para sa akin.
I've known him for years. Nasanay na ako na siya palagi kong kasama. It would be different when we get find someone else.
I mean. Syempre, we were both use of this relationship. It would be difficult for us. Mahirap magsimula ulit.
I will nurture this love for him. I could strengthen myself more for him. I will do anything just to end up with him.
I love him to the point na hindi ko kakayanin na mawala pa siya sa tabi ko. Kaya as much as possible. I want to show him what kind of love he really deserved.
The next morning. I wore my corporate attire entering our company. Baka mamayang gabi daw ang uwi nila Dad.
Supposedly. We should be having our meeting with the ACM Management today. Rescheduling it for another day dahil nagkaroon ng problema kaya na delay 'yung pagkikita.
Kaya naman, buong maghapon akong nakatutok sa laptop para gumawa ng report at e check ang ibang files na pwedeng idagdag sa ipapakita kong presentation.
We needed to change some things from the management. Medyo nagkaroon ng kumplikasyon kaya kailangan na baguhin. Edmund were in charge too kaya tumulong din siya sa pagplano.
Kinagabihan. Sabay ulit kaming kumain na lahat. Dad and Tito returned back safely from the errand. Kaya naman masaya kaming kumain sa hapag.
Katulad ng nangyari isang araw. Tita Carmona and Mom made the dinner. Para tuloy kami nagfi-fiesta nito. But it was good.
"Did we do it right?"
Nakataas noong tanong ni Tita ng magsimula na kaming kumain. She looks excited for us to taste the food they made.
"It's not that bad. And it's not that good either," si Tito.
Agad namang hinampas ni Tita Carmona ang asawa kaya agad kaming napangisi.
"How dare you say that Eduardo?" Nakakunot noong sambit ni Tita.
"You ask for it. I just answer," si Tito at ngumisi sa asawa.
Umiling na lang kami dahil sa pagtatalo ng dalawa. How can they be so cute like this? Bigla ko tuloy naalala si Dad at Mom nung nasa bahay pa kami.
"The food is great Carmona." pagbawi ni Tito.
Umiling na lang si Tita at kinausap na lamang kami. Hindi na muling binalingan si Tito kaya mas lalo kaming natawa.
Umakyat ako ng kasama si Mom. We decided to watch movie instead before we go to bed.
Niyaya ko talaga siya dahil matagal na namin na hindi ito ginagawa. Kaya naman dumeretso na ako sa kwarto nila Dad at umupo sa malambot nila na kama.
"Can't you just stay here?" Malungkot kong sabi.
Niyakap ang sariling tuhod habang pinapanood siyang nag-aayos sa harap ng salamin. She smiled at me from the mirror before tunringther head on me.
"Even if I want to stay sweety. You know I can't," aniya.
I bitterly smiled and nodded at her. She told me she'll be back after a few days from now. Ang bilis lang ulit kasi may muli na namang aalis.
"Don't be sad. We'll spend our Christmas together and New Year," aniya pa.
I didn't even notice that. Kung hindi niya lang sinabi baka hindi ko na naalala. Maybe I was too busy to think about the season.
"Magkakasama rin tayo," sambit niya at hinawi ang takas kong buhok.
She sat beside me and opened the television so that we could choose what to watch. Pinili na lang namin ang horror.
We like to scream from our blanket. It's our favorite thing to watch. Na imbes na maging katatakutan, we would probably laugh at our reaction.
"Let's just watch romance instead Wendy," si Mom ng tumabi sa akin.
Hugging a huge pillow. Umiling ako at ngumiti sa kanya.
"I'm done with romance. Akala ko ba paborito mo horror?" I teasingly asked.
"Hindi ko alam ang pinagsasasabi mo. I like romcom movies right now," natatawa siyang umiling.
"Sus. Hinawaan ka lang ata ni Dad niyan. He probably told you to stop watching horror because he's scared."
I chuckled. Matatakutin pa naman 'yun. Dad is sometimes weak, lalo na pagdating sa horror. Ewan ko ba.
"Alright, you win. Just don't pick the most brutal movie. Baka kasama ko na mamaya 'yan sa pagtulog," she laughed.
I nodded at her and chose what she wanted me to choose. Hindi nga ganun ka brutal 'yung palabas. Nakakagulat naman.
I was laughing the whole time dahil sa mga reaksyon ni Mom.
"Jusko,"
I hid under the blanket to avoid watching the intense part of the movie. Lumalakas ng lumakas na din 'yung music galing sa palabas. Just the que that something will happened.
Kaya naman nung matapos ang buong palabas. Nakahinga ako ng maluwag. I saw Mom drinking some water bago ito bumalik sa tabi ko.
"Mom?"
"Hmm," aniya at bumaling sa akin.
"Can I sleep here?"
She chuckled at me and held my hand.
"Of course,"
I smiled at her statement. Gusto ko lang na tumabi ngayon sa kanya. I just feel like filling up the void I had right now. I needed comfort. I know she can fulfill that for me.
"Do you have any problem?" Aniya. Bahagya akong nakayakap sa kanya habang siya ay nakasandal pa rin sa headboard ng kama.
"You can always tell me about it," aniya pa. She was caressing my hair.
"It's almost our anniversary," I started.
Hindi siya umimik at nanatiling nakikinig lang sa sinasabi ko.
"I wanted to surprise him. Kung sakaling papayag si Dad. I wanted to go to Cebu," sabi ko pa.
"Ask your Dad then," sambit niya.
"I will,"
Napabuntong hininga ako sa naisip.
"You're starting to feel lonely aren't you?"
I bitterly smiled. Kahit wala pa akong sinasabi. I know she knew about my feelings. Alam niya talaga ang nararamdaman ko.
"You'll get through that Wendy. You both are young. No matter what your fate will be, I know you both can get through it."
"Just like you and Dad?" Tanong ko.
"It's a different story. But we fought for it kaya kami pa rin sa huli." aniya.
"We can be like you right?"
"Of course. Hindi naman kayo habang buhay na maglalayo. You're here it means that you're working for your future. And same goes with him. It's just that you need to be strong no matter what,"
Napaisip tuloy ako. I remembered Amara and Dayle. Is it even possible?
"Is it possible to fell out of love?"
I don't want to question it. Pero minsan ko na ring naisip na paano kung mawalan na ng pake sa akin si Rad? I don't want the pessimism. Pero minsan ko na rin itong naitanong sa sarili.
"People fell out of love because they're not pure," si Mom.
"There are people who fell in love with specific intensions. Like they would only want you because they are lonely."
Napanguso ako. Bakit ko ba natanong. But it's great to have her opinion. It's different kind of words.
"People with right intensions will never fell out of love. They want you because they love you."
She's right. It's about having the right intentions from someone. It's pure. Pero mahirap ding hanapin.
Ang alam ko. I love Rad from the very beginning. I have nothing but I love him so much. That I can't even afford losing that man.
The more years we spend together. I know that this feelings will become stronger.
But at the same time I feel scared. I don't know fate. Paano kapag muli kaming paglaruan? It's just the beginning.
Alam ko na nagsisimula pa lang kami. But I get scared thinking that one day. I'll plead and cry for something that I don't want to happen.
Natatakot ako. I feel like having this bad omen. I just hope that I'm thinking the wrong idea. Kasi baka hindi ko kakayanin.