Chapter Thirty One- No more secrets
7 days completed.
One more week have passed. In total two since the night of Easton's confession.
"Hannah, I'm sorry but I think I can do this anymore."
She stopped chewing on her food and grimaced, "What? why? I thought we were tight. You know."
I shrugged, feeling anger. "No, I don't. I think you just want to get a piece of my brother and you're using me." I grabbed my bag from the floor and stood to leave when she out of nowhere three her coke at me, drenching me in it.
Seriously?
She cursed at me and stomped off. I deserved it. I shouldn't have said that. UGH!!!
What is wrong with me?
I pinched the front of my white tank top away from my skin and walked out of the cafeteria, letting everyone stare and talk behind me. I was just used to it by now.
I was agitated and angry all the time. This wasn't me. I was losing myself.
I strode to the nearest bathroom and cleaned myself. I removed the tank top and buttoned up the shirt I had kept open before. Layers always came handy. I brushed off and tied my curly hair up on my head, splashing some cold water on my face.
What stared at me were my freckles and then what he said--- No. I have to stop. I didn't know where Jeanette and he stood. I have seen them together but anyone could tell that something was off about them. He haven't tried talking to me or even fight. I missed him. I missed our banter.
I shut my eyes, heaving a deep breath.
"Okay. I'm going to ignore him. Not think about him." I made a weak promise to myself.
I didn't even realize when Photography class became my solace. I strolled inside the dark room and gazed at all the pictures I clicked and hung. Professor said, I was really good at it. I still didn't believe him. If only mom was here to guide me. She knew exactly what she wanted and how. Not me. I was a mess.
Alden's text sent my heart spiraling. 'I need to talk to you.'
'Okay, coming.'
I went to his building, towards the homeroom he told me but stopped dead in my tracks when I reached the threshold, door was wide open. Anger burst all around me and I swear I saw red. Alden's hands in her hair, his mouth covering hers, and her hands all over him.
A tear rolled down my cheek. "Jeanette." My voice broke.
They stumbled back, almost falling to the floor. She wiped her mouth, her eyes wide and horrified. My brother ran a hand through his hair, cursing and yelling.
He took a step towards me but I stepped back, raising my hand. Tears making their fall, "I hate you. Again? I hate both of you for doing this to him. I hate you... I can't say a word again. I hate..." I ran but bumped into a wall I knew all too well by now.
His arms wrapped around me and held me to him. His heart wild and crazy against my ear. He pushed me behind him, without taking his eyes off of Alden and Jeanette. Did he see? Everything? Why didn't I feel bad? Why did it felt so relieving to me?
With long few strides Easton pounced on Alden and the fight broke out. Jeanette screamed for Easton to stop. I should do something too but... Who was I suppose to stop?
Jeannette ran to me and begged me to help her break off the fight. I did. I grabbed Alden and tried dragging him away from Easton while she did the same. I screamed for them to stop, "WE ALL WILL BE EXPELLED! PLEASE STOP."
They did. Both breathless, heaving. Blood pouring out of their cuts.
Jeanette kept apologizing while Easton strode to me. I had never seen the look on his face he gave me in the moment. "I trusted you." Was the last three words he said to any of us and left.
Jeanette slipped to the floor, crying her hands. I should have gone to her side and tried to console her but, I just lost Easton's trust because these two decided to kiss again.
"I texted you to tell that today is mom's death anniversary and if you want have dinner with me." He sighed, wiping the blood off his lip and kneeling down beside her. She leaned into him while he held her in his arms. "We didn't mean it to happen. But, it had before. Twice now. We kept our distance, we tried ignoring each other but... I'm sorry. You had to keep it hidden in you. I'm sorry I didn't see how much this was burdening you."
I settled down in the seat nearest to me, wiping my tears, trying to see clear through my messed up thoughts. I didn't know what to say but what I said wasn't what I expected, "I love him. Easton." They just stared at me, blankly. I waited Jeanette to lash out and yell and fight me. But, she just snuggled into my brother's embrace and nodded.
"Even he does." She mumbled. For last two week, we were on and off. More off. I knew he didn't see me the way he did two years ago. He was... healed and suddenly wounded again but this time, my medicines didn't work on him. I guess... you are his medicine."
Alden balled his hand and just kept his stare towards the direction Easton left. "I'm in no state to talk right now. Cass, can we have dinner tonight? Just us four to pay our respects to mom?" When he put it that way, how did he except me to refuse?
I gave him a curt nod and left without a glance back at them cuddled together.
I last person on earth I wanted to see stood before me when I reached my locker. I snapped open my locker door, rolling my eyes at her, "Do you want now?"
Ms. Barbie grabbed my hand and made me look in her eyes. "Where is Jeanette? And don't lie to me. I know you are best friends or something. She's been missing practice so much and--"
I snatched my arm from hers and slammed shut the door, "I DON'T KNOW. OKAY? And we're not best friends. Not anymore." I strolled past her, rushing towards my next class.
***
I kept wanting to call or text Easton. He wasn't in Health. He wasn't in AP English. "Can you please check on him? I'm worried, Elliot."
He nodded, texting a couple of people he knew may know where he went. "Can you tell me what happened?"
I glanced down at my hands. I was still in no position to say anything. He glanced at Alden whose bruises were brightened and then at Jeanette whose eyes were crimson.
I think he could guess, but it was a long stretch. I sighed, ignoring his question and mumbled a quick sorry. No one said anything after then. I ditched photography and took a bus to where I guessed he could be.
I hiked the trail up to the cabin and sucked in a breathe when I saw his car parked at the side. I padded up to the door and knocked. There was no bell. I knocked again. Tears breaking out, I whimpered, "Easton, please. I know you are in there. Open the door, please."
He didn't. Instead I heard a loud breaking of a glass. "LEAVE." He yelled.
I shook my head, crying. "No. Please open the door. Let me explain." I slid beside the door, hugging my knees. "I'll be out here. Until you open the door." I announced. Five minutes. 10 min--
The door flung open and he bent, grabbing my arm and dragging me inside. He shut the door, pulling the blanket he held around me. He made me sit on the couch and disappeared for a minute but returned with a glass of water.
His hair were mess. Not the good kind. His eyes red.
I took the glass and drank it all. It was warm and helped with the cold I felt. "Now. Leave. Don't come back." His eyes were devoid of any warmth.
I placed the glass down and shook my head. "It was the last bus I took. Easton, I wanted to see how you were doing..."
"You saw. NOW LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE."
I wiped my tears and stood up, facing him. "No."
He heaved in a deep breath and ran a hand through his hand, clutching some in tight grip. "Fine. I'll take drop you home."
"You're not coming?"
He dared a step towards me, stare so intense my entire body trembled with intimidation.
He turned around, as if talking to me was waste of his voice and walked down the hallway. I plopped back down on the sofa but he was back with his jacket and car keys. Then he was out the door. Guess, I didn't really have a choice.
Licking my dry lips, I quickly pulled out the letter I wrote on the bus for him-- knowing he would give me a chance. But he needed to know. Everything.
No more secrets.
I left the note on the top of the fireplace knowing he'd be coming to burn it up in the night. And with that I let him drop me home and then he was gone, sped away faster than I could blink.