Dr. John invited her to have lunch after their therapy session, Brynn did not refused so she come along with the young doctor. Besides, Ben knows that she has check up today but unfortunately, his parents visited him today so Ben did not make it to accompany her.
Dr. John brought her to a fine dine-in restaurant somewhere near the hospital, according to the doctor, it is his favorite restaurant. Thursday's seems really familiar to Brynn, she examined the place, and tell herself, Why do I feel like I've eaten here?
She watched Dr. John selecting meal on the menu, while observing, that moment also seems familiar to her— sitting opposite to a man's. Brynn tried to ditched the thought but it keeps on bugging her. She touched her temple and massaged it while still trying to recall that familiar moment— she closed her eyes to focus.
I need space.
We both need space.
We can't just sit and talk about it then argue over and over again.
Dr. John tapped her in her arms snatched her out from her reveries, 'Are you alright, may masakit ba sayo?'
She faked a smile, 'N-no. I'm fine. I'll be okay with any meal, I'll just go to the comfort room. Excuse me,'
Brynn stood up and hurriedly went to the comfort room, she examined herself in the mirror while her heart is pounding. 'Who are you? Can't you just fucking remember anything?!'
She scolded at herself, forcing herself to remember something. She seem eager to know herself these past few days.
'Just a fucking restaurant, Brynn. Just a fucking restaurant yet you cannot remember anything!' she annoyingly whispered.
She tried again but obviously her mind is tired of recalling things that she cannot remember anymore. It was just like a glimpse, heard a male voice asking for a space.
Her phone rang and it's Ben.
'Hello.'
'You done with your check up?'
'Yes.'
'How was it?'
'Still no progress.'
'Uh, it's okay Brynn, soon you will be able to remember everything. Take it slowly.'
'How long will I take it slowly?' she impatiently asked, 'I'm getting tired of this.'
Ben sighed from the other line, 'Hey, don't give up yet. Why are you so eager to remember forgotten memories? Is anyone put you up in a hurry?'
'Ben, I'm tired, really. It's so frustrating to be curious about who I really am.'
'Im sorry.'
'Now, why are you telling me you're sorry? How many times do I have to tell you that it's not your fault..'
Ben breath heavily, 'I didn't saved you.'
'Can't you just tell me what really happened? I won't be mad, I promise, as long as you're telling me the truth.'
'I don't think this is the right time.'
'Then, I'll go to your house, let's talk? I'll cancel this lunch with Dr. John then—'
'Brynn, just give me a little more time, okay? I am not yet... ready.'
Brynn was quiet.
'I promise, once I'm ready, I'm going to tell you everything. Please not this time, not today. I don't want to ruin their visit.'
'I understand.'
'Are you mad?'
'What should I feel?'
'Im sorry.'
'I'll hang up,'
'C-can you make it today?'
'I'll try..'
'Please Brynn, they're expecting you today.'
She sighed, 'Okay. Fine. You disappoint me but I'll do this for Auntie and Uncle. You owe me an explanation, deal?'
'Like what I said, I only owe you an explanation if the time is finally right and when I'm ready. Deal?'
'It's a deal.'
She hang up as soon as she went back to their seat.
'What took you so long?' nakangiting tanong nito. 'Food is ready.'
She smiled, 'Sorry, Ben called.'
'Oh, did he missed you already?' Dr. John joked.
Brynn shook her head, 'No. He just told me that his parents are looking for me. They flew all the way from their province just to see me.'
'You must be really important to them.' Dr. John guessed.
She shrugged, 'Yes. They treat me as their own. Alam mo Doc, sometimes I wonder, did his parents really liked his wife or they liked me more?'
Brynn jokingly stated, 'Kasi they never brought up Ben's wife, they'd always want to talk about Ben and I all the time. Sometimes I feel like I was forced to marry Ben.'
She then drank her wine.
'What if you find out that you're really married to Ben? What will you do?' seryosong tanong nito.
She almost spit out the wine, she put down her glass.
She forced a laugh, 'I will do nothing because that is very impossible! Marrying Ben is the least thing that I wanted to happen. Besides, he's really devoted to his wife so why would he marry me?'
'Brynn, I know how much you wanted to remember your forgotten memories. Where you from, who you were, reason of your memory loss and even to whom you were really belong. Just a piece of advice,' Dr. John seriously stated, looking directly in her eyes. 'You might already have the answers around you— sometimes, you may not see it because you are being blinded by the people around you, don't ever let that happen. Dont let someone fool you around. Open your eyes to see things clearly. It's time.'
She stopped eating, 'W-what do you mean?'
'Anything, right now, can make you remember. Or, atleast, one thing that happened in your life— it can be good or bad as long as it can help you.' he seriously stated, 'For example, if I kiss you right now, can you remember even just one incident?'
She was startled and embraced herself, 'K-kiss me?'
'Yes. I'll kiss you. What's wrong with that?' Dr. John smirked.
'No. You can't do that.'
'And why is that?'
'If you kiss me, I'd feel like I am cheating on someone.' she honestly stated.
Dr. John laughed, 'I was just kidding. But, you might be in a relationship or something.'
She wrinkled her brows, 'So are you saying that I have a boyfriend?'
'What if you do?' tanong nito, 'Will you be mad at Ben for not telling you?'
Can I be mad at him? She thought.
'I don't know.' she answered.
'Here, another example.' Dr. John held her hand while looking at her eyes, 'Do you remember anything?'
She shook her head telling him that she remembered nothing.
'Do you feel something's strange while I'm holding your hand and looking directly in your eyes?' tanong ulit ng doktor.
She shook her head again, she did not felt anything strange. Dr. John let go of her hand, 'You didn't feel anything or remember something because we don't have memories together. Did you notice that you can only remember something, if you created memories together. And in this case, you just met me now that's why we don't have memories. Always remember this, every single person that around you now, can be an answer to your questions— and I'm definitely not that person.'
Hanggang sa kanyang byahe papunta sa bahay ni Ben ay hindi niya makalimutan ang mga sinabi ni Dr. John, it's all making sense now. She just realised that maybe Ben could be the answer to her questions.
Brynn almost skipped seeing Ben's parents, lumagpas kasi ang sinasakyan niya ng mga dalawang kanto kaya muntik niya ng hindi maabutan ang mga ito.
After Ben's parents left his house, they stayed outside for a while. He overlooks at their family car until it disappeared.
'What if you find out that you're really married to Ben? What will you do?'
'For example, if I kiss you right now, can you remember even just one incident?'
'Brynn, let's go inside.' Ben invited her inside his house.
'Wait!'
Brynn grabbed Ben's collar and sealed his lips with a kiss.
(PLEASE PLAY THE SONG ATTACHED)
If Dr. John kissed me, I'd feel like cheating on someone. But kissing Ben, is a different feeling. I felt so secured, she thought.
None of them tried to stop the kiss.
His eyes were familiar to me, even his lips. I felt like I've kissed them before.
Ben put his hand on her face and pressed his lips on hers.
Brynn saw herself wearing a white gown, walking in the aisle. Someone's waiting in the altar, wearing a white tuxedo, but, still covered with light.
'Anything, right now, can make you remember. Or, atleast, one thing that happened in your life—'
She tried to figure out who was the groom in white tuxedo, but kissing Ben right now makes her forget what she's been thinking.
'If you didn't marry me, would you pursue your dream career?' A familiar voice asked.
'When I met you, my dreams suddenly changed. I just woke up one day and realised that my dream is to be your wife and be the mother of your kids.'
'But I know it's not your dream—'
'Sssssh, don't ever say that.'
The guy slowly moved closer to her face and sealed her lips with a kiss.
The she muttered, 'I love you. Ben.'
Brynn was surprised. She pushed Ben suddenly. And turned away from him.
'B..brynn, don't leave.' He held her arms and tried to stop her from running away.
'I'm sorry.'
She removed his grip without looking into his eyes then ran away and grabbed a taxi.
Brynn's heart is pounding so loud again.
'Did you notice that you can only remember something, if you created memories together. And in this case, you just met me now that's why we don't have memories. Always remember this, every single person that around you now, can be an answer to your questions— and I'm definitely not that person.'
'His eyes. His lips. The way he stare at me. Every time he touch me. I can feel something's strange...
That only means, we created memories together. Because I can now remember something. I'm not sure but, why did I just remembered telling Ben that I love him?
My dream was to be his wife.'
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© sincerely, kate