I was very happy for my best friend, don't get me wrong. But the thing was, she opened up a can of worms I had been actively working to avoid. Hearing even the name of the college sent shivers down my spine. It made me realise that audition invitations were beginning to be sent out. I very much could have received something like that at any given moment.
I really had to sharpen my music and develop a level of confidence that was suited for the college I had my eyes on.
Berklee had no idea what was coming.
~~~~~~~
I walked into music with a fierce determination. It felt good to finally be in the class I knew was really going to help me with my future. While I had never really minded all my other classes before, today they felt like the only thing holding me back from where I really wanted to be.
Scott had a weird look on his face as soon as he saw me walking into the class. Maybe I needed to relax my shoulder. Yeah. And not look too different to my usual self. Nevertheless, he turned to address the class.
"Alright everybody," a couple of the girls in the class giggled amongst themselves and continued whispering animatedly.
"Hey, hey! Settle down now."
Silence.
"Thank you. Today's lesson is basically just going to be free time for all of you to work on your pieces. So please, get into your groups and for the love of God, please do work. I'll be here if you need me." Scott finished his sentence with a clap - basically his way of telling us to get moving. And we did.
I turned to face James, only to find he was already facing me - a ghost of a smile graced his face. I blushed slightly. Then I heard someone clearing their throat and instinctually, I rolled my eyes. Looking past James, I locked eyes with Kyle, who took that as his cue to start talking.
"So, I had an idea about what we should write."
"How about you take your idea, roll it up in a ball and shove it up your ass." I smiled sweetly at him and batted my eyelashes. James snickered beside me and Kyle narrowed his eyes at me.
"What do you think the most romantic city in the world is?" He continued, disregarding my interruption. James and I humoured him.
"Paris?" My answer was generic. I knew it.
"How generic. No." Kyle stared at me, unflinching. His gaze was so intense, I immediately had to look away. Luckily, James decided to speak up.
"Rome?"
"Better," Kyle nodded, but he still wasn't pleased, "but again, it's generic. I'm pretty sure there's a song about that. Hold up." He raised a finger and pulled out his iPhone. James and I both groaned in response. We really just wanted him to finish making his point.
"Yup. Dermot Kennedy. What a great song. Carter, have you heard this before?" He played the song and I recognised it from my sister's playlist.
"Yeah. He's a great songwriter. But what's your point?" My patience was beginning to wear thin.
"My point is, I think we should do something like this. But we should personalise it - centre it on a city so plain, it's disgustingly authentic. So, when I say what do you think the most romantic city in the world is, I don't mean what's the most instagrammable place, I mean, to you, personally, what city reminds you of any love you have ever experienced?"
He was really forcing us to think, and as much as I hate to admit it, I was very curious to discover where his idea was headed.
I began to think long and hard about what he was saying. Being from Arizona, I had always thought New York and Los Angeles were the most romantic cities, in the sense that they were beautiful places filled with endless opportunities. But I had no true emotional attachment to either cities.
I hadn't actually experienced love or romance - unless you count summer camp. Camp Dixie. His name was Jesse or something like that, honestly I don't even really remember. But anyways thats beside the point.
"Savannah, Georgia." I said, my mind remembering the feeling of the boys soft, chapped lips on mine. We were what, 9? Although that was a long time ago, I still remember his sparkling green eyes and floppy blond hair. He smelled of grass and rubber - probably because he had fallen from the tire swing a minute before kissing me.
"Sounds like there's a story behind that." Kyle leaned closer, completely ignoring that James was between the two of us. I instantly began laughing. There was truly no point in me laughing, I just thought this whole situation was funny - I was going to tell 2/5 the story of my first kiss.
"Kyle, we really don't need to get into my life. Please just explain your brilliant idea."
"Aw come on Carter, don't be like that." He cooed. I desperately needed James to make his presence known. This was becoming too much of a Kyle and I conversation.
"James, any city come to mind?" I turned to exclusively face him, though my eyes did dart back to Kyle, only to find him staring with an amused grin on his face. My attention seemed to break James out of his daze.
"Um... Yeah. North Carolina?" He seemed a bit flustered. Oh, now I wanted to know the story behind North Carolina and why he seemed as though he was momentarily transported back to another time and place.
"No." Kyle intervened. "Not another song about North Carolina. I am sick of hearing about her."
My eyes widened slightly. Who was in North Carolina, and why was she James' muse? I wanted so badly to ask him, but was it really any of my business? He didn't owe me any explanations.
"Oh you wanna know who North Carolina is, don't you?" Kyle smirked at me. I did want to know, but I wasn't going to admit it, so I rolled my eyes at him.
"Kyle, don't even go there, man." James spoke with an authoritativeness I had never heard from him before. This shit must have been serious. But Kyle looked back at him, with a challenging smile.
"I mean, I always have to hear about her, I think it's only fair that our new collaborator Annabelle gets to hear it too. Writing a song with someone is letting them into your life, opening up to them. Letting them see the deepest, darkest version of yourself."
"Oh really." James was challenging Kyle now. There was a shift in the atmosphere. I could feel that shit was about to go down.
Their eyes remained trained on each other, unflinching.
"If that's the case, the why don't we write our song about a trip to Vancouver?"
Kyle's eyes filled with anger and he abruptly stood up from his seat. He slammed his hand on the table and angrily growled two simple words that held a lot of power.
"Fuck you."
The whole class stared as he stormed out of the classroom. I looked to James and he simply shrugged his shoulders. Scott gave me a questioning look, probably assuming that I was the one who had caused Kyle to leave, but in all of our disagreements, I had never seen Kyle this mad.
Part of me wanted to follow after him, but I knew that wasn't a good idea, so instead I cleared my throat and turned back to James.
"How about we listen to Rome and try and figure out where he was going with this?" I spoke after a moment of silence. James looked relieved that I had chosen not to dig deeper into what they had been talking about. My curiosity was working in overdrive, but tensions were way too high for me to even think about saying anything.
"Yeah. Um, let's do that." He grabbed his AirPods out of his bag and handed one to me, playing the song.
For a moment, I was able to forget about Kyle. The music sucked us both in and I closed my eyes.
The song was slow, complex and deeply romantic. The lyrics looked back to a better time. They evoked the use of every different feeling in order to create a full picture of the past. I could almost touch, see and hear everything Dermot Kennedy was talking about.
I understood.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N:
Now that I'm back, these chapters just seem to be writing themselves!
As you can probably tell, my music taste has evolved over the last few years, which is why Annabelle hasn't mentioned her favourite bands in a while. Sorry.
I promise, with the next few chapters, I am trying everything I possibly can to get back into her state of mind. But at the same time, since she has started hanging out with Crash and Burn, Annabelle has changed. I hope this reflects in the chapters? I don't know. That didn't even make sense.
Any who, please let me know what you think! Feel free to message me, I do reply to every message!!! Also, comment, vote etc!!
Cheers!