December 22nd, 2019
Y/n's POV
I fucked up, I really did and the past few months have definitely shown that to be true.
It's crazy how one thing could be such a domino effect.
Between what happened with Ariana and my mom a few months ago, the whole boyfriend video she shot with Mikey and Scootie, getting in that accident, me getting upset over the fact that she was just being a caring girlfriend and helping me out while I heal up, and then us not talking for nearly a month because of it, I honestly don't know what's worse.
Trust me when I say this, I wish I could go back and change all the shit that happened over the past few months cause I know it definitely had an effect on Ariana's mental and I'll admit it had an effect on mine as well but you simply can't change the past.
Although I was doing a lot of wishing that we could when we stopped talking for that month that honestly to me felt like centuries.
I know with tour and everything it kinda restricted us from being with each other physically, but knowing that in that month that I wasn't even gonna be able to talk to her was like torture for me.
I made sure to remind her that I cared about her at any chance that I possibly could, I left her countless voicemails and texts telling her how much I loved her which honestly drove me insane because there were times when I just wanted to call her but I knew I couldn't because she wasn't gonna answer.
I understood why though, she was still upset with me and that's okay.
That's besides the point though, along with those things I made sure that with every tour stop she got a bouquet of roses and I mean at every single stop.
They were the expensive kind too so I spent over 20 grand on them, but honestly the money isn't an issue for me as long as Ariana is happy.
All of her friends, her backup dancers, production team, and honestly just everyone on that tour with her would always tell me that she appreciates the sentiments but she thinks we have to work on ourselves before we work with each other and I honestly never understood what that meant.
Luckily the month ended and I was finally able to actually talk to her like I used to.
She was and is still understandably upset about everything but I can't exactly control that.
Getting back to now though, today is Ariana's final stop on this tour and I figured that since mine had ultimately been postponed to finish next year that I'd go since it's at the Forum in LA.
I haven't physically been with her since I walked out after that fight that we had concerning my injuries and her helping so this was definitely gonna be interesting to say the least.
I know she misses me, but she just doesn't want to admit it.
So surprising her tonight is gonna test that for sure, and of course I'm bringing the roses.
It's the final stop for her on a tour she wasn't even originally planning on doing but she somehow found all the courage and confidence in herself to do this amazing tour for her fans and I commend her wholeheartedly for it.
I should probably get going though cause she's supposed to be on stage in an hour as told to me by Scooter and I live like 45 minutes from the forum, and in LA traffic time that's like forever so I really need to go.
Usually I'd have my driver Eli take me wherever I needed to go, but I figured that it was about time he got some time away and for me to finally drive since I had gotten my casts off so I told him to go be with his family.
It's not like I can't drive myself anyways so I didn't want to stress him about it.
It was a relatively quiet drive for me tonight, like usually I'd be listening to music but I really wanted to make sure I knew what I was going to say to Ariana when I finally do see her in person.
I was nervous for sure because I don't know what her reaction is gonna be.
She might be small, but she's violent. I would never pick a fight with her.
Her cuteness makes up for it though so I guess it's worth it in a way.
I continued my drive in silence glancing over at the roses from time to time.
They were perfect just like her, maybe not as perfect as she is but close enough.
Once I reached the Forum, I made sure I went around to the back entrance.
As usual the security team standing guard there let me in without a big fuss so I was relieved about that cause I was already stressing.
I roamed the halls a bit making sure not to run into Ariana because I wanted to surprise her at the end of the show rather than her see me now and be completely unfocused during the entirety of it all.
Everybody knew that I was coming tonight except for her so I was keeping things as low key as possible as to not give myself away.
I spotted Frankie, Brian, and Scott by catering so I made my way over to talk to them a bit before the show starts.
"What's up you guys?" They all turned their attention to me and we all hugged each other fairly quickly.
"Look who decided to finally show up."
I laughed slightly at what Frankie said cause I could tell he was joking.
"Yeah Y/n, what took you so long? She goes on in like 5 minutes." Brian asks me.
"I know, I know I just got caught up with some things and I live almost a full hour from the forum so I was basically rushing myself to get here."
"Well the important thing is that you're here now." We all nodded at what Scott said. "So did you get it?"
"Get what?" I was confused now.
"You know." He repeats to me all the while giving me a pointed look.
"Oh I remember now, and yeah I got it." I rummaged around in my pocket for a second before pulling it out. "I have to go back to my jeweler tomorrow so that he can put the finishing touches on it, but other than that everything is pretty much set."
I handed it to them so they could look at it themselves.
"You really went all out for this one, this is huge." They were all in agreement with what Frankie said.
"I know, I just really love your sister and I want to give her the best cause she deserves it." They all smiled. "You think she's gonna like it?
"Hell yeah, but if she doesn't I'll be glad to take it off your hands." We all laughed at what Frankie said. "I'm kidding, she's going to love it Y/n."
I looked at Brian and Scott and they nodded reassuring me further.
The music started blaring though the Forum so I had to wrap this conversation up, I didn't want Ariana to see me until the show was over.
"She's about to go on so I'm gonna watch from somewhere that she most definitely won't be able to find me in between intermission. Do you think you guys could like put these somewhere so that they don't like die before I give them to her?"
They handed me the box back and I put it in my pocket before Scott took the roses from me and nodded.
"We'll see you after, and we'll try not to let it slip that you're here." I smiled at that and walked away so I could watch the show.
—/—/—/—/—
It was like it got better every time, with every show she does it just gets better.
She dedicated herself to every show but I don't know, it's like the fact that this was gonna be the last one for however long she decided it's like she gave her 100 percent but triple that.
I was pretty much everywhere during the whole show interacting with the fans so I'm not sure how she didn't see me but I'm just glad that she didn't.
Her dancers just gave her the roses I had bought for her since I told them to just give them to her as soon as they could.
I was just finishing a conversation with Tommy and Scooter when I had to get to the stage before she walked off.
Luckily for me, her backup dancers had distracted her enough and she was at the front of the stage saying her final goodbyes.
That gave me just enough time to get up there and as soon as the fans saw me, their cheers got even louder which honestly shocked me cause I thought they were already loud.
Their cheering tipped her off for sure cause she turned and immediately took off in a full a sprint in my direction, jumping into my arms and wrapping her legs around my waist to hug me tighter once she reached me.
"I missed you." She whispered in my ear.
"I missed you too." She leaned back slightly to kiss me before I let her back down. "I wanted to make sure I got ahold of you while you were still on stage cause I need your fans to hear this too."
I spoke into the mic I was holding but she looked confused by what I meant.
"Okay?"
"Can we all just take a moment to marvel at this woman here real quick?" The fans cheered. "10 months, over 100 shows not including headlining Coachella, and lollapalooza is just incredible to me and I hope you all feel the same way."
She smiled at me and looked out at the fans.
"I just want to say that she honestly wasn't even going to do this tour because of what happened in Manchester a few years back and a bunch of other things that I really don't want to bring up right now but she cares about her fans and she's not one to disappoint. It honestly took a lot for her to even do one show let alone 100 plus so she deserves all the love and support possible for doing this."
The fans started chanting her name causing her to smile even wider than before.
"You guys are so sweet." She admitted to them.
"I also want to take this time to tell her how sorry I am for everything that's happened and I'm not talking about just these last four or five months." Her smile dropped slightly giving her a look of empathy. "I'm talking about every month since this tour started for you because I was so busy thinking about me all the time when I should've been thinking about you, all of those nights where you would cry yourself to sleep and not know if you'd be able to go on doing this for months on end were nights where I should've tried to be there for you and I wasn't. Even with me knowing how touring and being away from each other for so long was effecting you negatively, I still tried to ignore it because I didn't think it was as bad as it actually was and I regretted that every time." She nodded. "Saying sorry honestly isn't enough for me because I know I could've helped a lot better and more than I did."
"Things are okay baby, we're okay. At the end of the day the only thing that matters is that I'm going home to you, and now that tour is over we have all the time in the world to make up for lost time with each other that we didn't have before."
"That sounds almost as perfect as you." She smiles again and attached herself to my side. "You gotta say goodbye to your fans first."
That's exactly what she did, but she was not gonna let me go for anything so I was practically walked around the stage a couple of times.
Thankfully she let me go once Scooter stopped her underneath the stage so he could tell her just how proud of her he was.
She got emotional again but it was totally worth it cause Scooter said exactly what everyone else was thinking in their heads.
She was eager to get out of here and go home so she showered and got changed pretty quickly.
The car ride back home was gonna be kinda long because of the traffic leaving the concert and just the normal LA traffic so I knew she was gonna be antsy like she is now.
I didn't exactly know what she was thinking about in her head but I knew I wanted to prove to her just how sorry I am and I couldn't stand the waiting.
That double update for you all, and I have another in the works as we speak so be ready😌
Anyways though, like, comment, and enjoy✌🏼😁