Sasha looked at me as if I had just slapped her in the face
"Jo that is a terrible idea!" She whisper-yelled
We were in Ravenclaw common room and it was right before dinner on a weekend: not many were around; I had chosen this moment to ask her to come with me at the D.A. meeting which was about to happen
"What you're proposing is very very dangerous!"
"It's not any more dangerous than going to lesson! We still get hurt for not doing anything so we might as well strike back"
"No, you know its not true" Sasha was getting worked up and her voice was raising "You're brilliant Jo, I know you know its more dangerous to be part of Dumbledore's Army!"
"Shh!" I looked around to make sure everyone was still ignoring us
"Carrow already has it out for you" she continued relentlessly, but her voice was lower "You really want to give him a reason?"
"He doesn't need one that's the problem!" I showed her the back of my left hand even if it was completely healed
"And what will happen if he catches you? He is a psychopath Jocelyn!"
"You don't have to remind me! I am the one he hates"
"Is this what your uncle wants? Tell me, is this what Oberon would want? Beacuse I can't see him agreeing with any of this!"
I hadn't expected her to be so against it. I was almost certain she wouldn't have come with me but I didn't think she would try to convince me not to go as well.
"It's not his decision. I'm 17 I can do whatever I think is right"
"Oh, don't play the adolescent rebel card-"
"Sash I'm doing this! I'm only offering you to do it with me"
"What you're offering me is a sure path to pain!" She sighed and looked at her hands for a second. I took a deep breath; it was time for me to go, Luna was waiting for me outside
"Can I change your mind?"
"No" I answered calmly but decisive
Sasha got up from the couch
"I won't betray your secret Jo. But I don't approve of this and I do not want to see you getting hurt"
"I won't"
"You can't promise me that! ...will you ask Jade too?"
"No" I got up too "Mark's already in, if she wanted to join she already would have"
I hated myself for doing it, but I checked my watch "I have to go-"
"Go then! If I can't stop you it's no use wasting my voice!"
Having said that, she walked towards the dorms and disappeared.
I sighed and made a mental note to find her later.
Why did it have to be so difficult? I knew that she was afraid at least as much as I was and I thought I was offering her something she needed, because I needed the D.A.
I left the common room and found Luna sitting on a step waiting for me
"Is she coming? Should we wait?"
"No, let's go"
We walked silently through the corridors, keeping an eye out for the Carrows but otherwise very calm: we weren't doing anything wrong ...yet.
"You seem very upset"
"So?" I sounded more aggressive than I intended it but Luna didn't seem offended at all
"Why are you so upset, Jo? Is it just because she's not going to be in the D.A. with us?"
"No" I let out a big breath.
It wasn't her fault I was stressed. I let my mind wonder over my reasons for a minute "...I think we are growing a part" I admitted in the end
"I'm real sorry about that. But you know, if you need a friend you can always come to talk to me"
"Thanks Luna, you are a good friend"
We reached the class designated for the meeting but we waited a little, casually leaning against the wall on the opposite side of the corridor; we pretended to chat while some students passed us on their way to dinner.
"Hey you two!" Neville's head pocked out of the classroom right after the last few students had disappeared and he gestured us to get inside
"Hi" I half smiled
"Hey..." Neville looked at me as if something wasn't really right
"Hello Neville"
"Luna"
"Are we all here?" I looked around and saw Ginny and a couple of other kids I knew and some that I didn't
I waved at Mark who was talking with his best friend Ben. Mark waved back, unenthusiastic; I guessed he had had a fight with Jade: she couldn't have reacted much differently than Sasha had.
Ben smiled broadly to me, that perfect smile he flashed every girl
"We're waiting for Seamus but he should get here pretty soon"
"Got it" I answered. I was still looking in their direction when I realized Neville was looking at me "What?"
He hesitated "Nothing"
I was about to ask him again but a great noise came from behind me: Seamus Finnegan had just entered the room, making a lot of noise because of his haste in closing the door
"Hey guys! Sorry, Mrs. Norris-"
"It's all right, just come in" sighed Neville checking the door; Seamus gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder
"You're Jo, right?" he offered his hand to me
"Right" I shook it, smiling "Hi"
After that Ginny took the word and the meeting started.
"Keep it steady!" Ginny yelled from her position above my head "...like that. Good!"
I finally reached her altitude and then relaxed a bit, still gripping my broom with all my strength.
It was a beautiful afternoon; the whole week it had been raining but in the morning a brigh and fierce sun pierced the clouds and warmed the air. It was one of the last warm days we were going to have.
Ginny had offered help with my flying project and I couldn't stay in the common room any longer: Sasha had not relented since our first discussion. She was scared for me, I knew, but she wouldn't stop pressuring me! Jade had only helped her making it worse.
I felt I was loosing them and it scared me... but at the same time it wasn't possible our friendship could be destroyed by this! I just needed to give them time.
"Wow! This is harder than I thought it would be"
Ginny shrugged with a laugh "I love to fly!"
"I know, I saw you a lot of times, flying around"
"Yeah"
I smiled, enjoying the light breeze that moved my hair "You don't do it as much anymore"
"I don't enjoy it as much now that Harry is away"
I turned around to look at her, she was staring straight ahead "I don't enjoy anything as much actually"
It was as if sadness had completely overwhelmed her in a matter of seconds
"Do you know if he's ok?"
"No... and Ron and Hermione... we don't know anything about them"
I wasn't exactly sure if she had let herself go because she trusted me and wanted to talk, or if I was just witnessing a moment of weakness and in that case she could want me to leave
"They are doing what they can to help"
"Are they?"
Ginny let go of a bitter laugh and then shaked her head, breathing deeply "...no, I'm sorry. I know they are"
"Nobody knows what it is, then"
"No. Dumbledore only entrusted them with the secret, but it must have been important or they wouldn't have left the battle"
"I'm sure of it" I thought back to our silver haired headmaster "And Dumbledore would have never send them on a mission if it wasn't vitally important"
"I know" she sighed, beginning to relax again "He even left them gifts. He tried to give them the Sword of Gryffindor, you know"
"What?"
"Yeah, in his will. The minister didn't allow it and then... well the Ministry was taken"
I was very, very surprised "Dumbledore must have known he couldn't just give that sword to anyone! I mean, it wasnt his to give!" I added after seeing the look in Ginny's eyes.
She seemed undecided for a split second, but then she nodded "I know, it's very odd"
"Maybe it doesn't matter" I reflected
"What?"
"Well Dumbledore was a genius and he knew they would have never allowed Harry to get the Sword, so why even mention it in the will unless he wanted Harry to know he needed it?"
"What do you mean?"
"Whatever they are doing maybe they need the Sword to accomplish it, and maybe that was Dumbledore's way of telling them" I finished explaining my theory. Ginny was silent for a minute, lost in her own thoughts
"Well, they certainly were very upset at the idea of not getting it" she reasoned "I can't imagine for what other reason they might have wanted it. I'm sure if they can, they'll try to get a hold of it"
"Wait, so You Know Who took the sword from the minister?"
"I don't know" the question caught her by surprise, I guess she hadn't really thought about it before "...well I don't think the minister took the sword in the first place"
"So... it's probably still in the headmaster's office"
Ginny's eyes got big and her face went blank "You're right!" she turned to look at me with a broad smile that could only mean trouble
"Ginny don't make that crazy face!" I chuckled nervously
"Jo! If the Sword is here we can do something to help!"
I looked around and spotted Pansy hiding behind a small tree
"Let's not talk about it here"
Ginny followed my gaze until she found her "She's not very sly is she?"
"Nope" I sighed "but the fact that she thinks she is, is actually good: I can always spot her... and it's also very funny"
"Why does she follow you around?"
"I don't know"
Pansy shifted a little, I turned my broom so that I faced Ginny and the Slytherin wouldn't suspect she had been seen "She mentioned once that I have enemies in the castle so I think someone set her up to it"
"...So let's change the subject!" She chirped, her eyes were sparkling with curiosity "Luna told us you have a boyfriend!" She batted her eyelashes with a comical dreamy look
"I do?"
"Yes" Ginny seemed put off: it was evident she was dying to talk about it and maybe assumed I was keeping it secret "The Quidditch player who graduated last year"
"David?"
"Ah ah" she nodded
"No we're not together, he's a friend!"
"Ugh, Luna!"
Her face made me laugh very hard which made Ginny smile as well "She always misreads these things!"
"Why am I not surprised?"
"But this means you are single"
"So?" Ginny's grin was coming back "Don't make that face!"
"Oh, come on! You are funny, smart and cute! So what's the problem, uh? Why don't you want a boyfriend?"
"I never said I don't want a boyfriend"
"Then why don't you have one?"
"I.. it's just-" this conversation was not what I had expected "...guys don't really notice me"
Ginny was silent for a split second "Oh shut up!"
"I'm serious" I chuckled "My friends are all gorgeous, yourself included! I kind of disappear next to you"
"That is so not true!"
"But it is! And it's ok Ginny" I added quickly before she could cut me off "I'm fine! I've had boyfriends before, I don't suffer because I don't look like a model of Modern Witch and I don't think it would be good for me to have any more self esteem than I already have"
"You do have a big ego" she reflected
"That's because I'm awesome"
She nodded, pensively but she wasn't done apparently "You know, that Ben guy who was at the meeting, he looked at you in a certain way..."
"Ben Lewis is a slut! He looks at every girl that way"
"He wasn't looking at me that way"
"That's because he knows you're Potter's girl! And he probably saw you kicking ass at Quidditch"
Ginny grinned again, she resembled a pixie with that mischievous smile "You bet he did"
"You play rough!"
"Ok so you don't need me to fix you up?"
"Nope"
We looked around us a little longer, the sun was low in the sky, it was almost sundown; another sign that we were going in the winter. The days were shorter and shorter.
"Do you want to practice a little more?"
I thought about it for a moment.
It had been a truly nice day: Ginny was getting to be a very good friend, and Merlin! I needed good friends.
With Sasha and Jade slipping away I really needed someone to share my feelings about the D.A. and everything else that was changing around me.
Hogwarts, my second home, was now alien and dangerous; Ginny, Luna, Neville, they made me feel like it was ok to talk about it.
"How about we go find Luna and eat cake?"
"You've got yourself a deal!"
"But first let's go hang out close to the forest"
"Why?"
"The sun doesn't reach there" I pointed to a shaded part of the park, downhill "So there's still enough mud to cover Pansy head to toe"
"I like how you think"