Chapter 19| Candle Light
When I see you smiling and dazzling,
My wish of us being together forever seems like it'll come true.
🍁
The afternoon air freshly kicks off warm as soon as Jeno exits the door. The uncertainty of self-doubt enlarges every step he takes but he wishes to eliminate all the possible negative thoughts out of his head. He wants to give her a good impression, afterall.
The restaurant is almost empty but the luxurious decor, rich in fancying the aristocrats remains undefeated even when the seats are vancantly occupied. Aside from a couple of seats taken, Jeno searches for her with unlimited patience. As much as he hates to prolong this coming talk, his mind comes unprepared for the acceptance of what she has to say.
Confirming that he has no trace of her presence in the building yet, Jeno forwards to occupy the seat in the corner, slightly giving an overview about the conditions on the road from the glass window.
"Good afternoon, sir. What can I have for you?"
The voice of the polite waiter calls back his attention from drifting everywhere like a newly made kite roaming on the night air. He accepts a space for the neatly printed copy of the menu but he refuses to order anything. He would rather wait a few minutes or so.
He actually isn't prepared for this meeting. It truely is so sudden and whatever that comes beyond this will remark something different in their situation. Jeno isn't able to differentiate if this meeting would be that of a upboosting one or a downgrading one. His very first intincts told him to come here as soon as possible to figure out any more things that will make this situation better. But to be honest, Jeno has already given up on the fate. He is more than determined to create direct his own life into how he wants things to turn out. More or less, this rather gives him a headache just to think of it that way.
His deep thoughts are disturbed once again by the sharp echoing of the friction between the heels and the thick floor. He looks up, catching the look of the face and knowing the familiarity of the woman so well.
He knowingly stands up, acting upon the mannerism by opening up the only one button of his coat with one hand and reaching out the other one for a handshake.
The woman beams lightly and nods, accepting the handshake and brushing her thumb upon the forehand to show her sincere content from this meeting.
"Good afternoon Jeno" she greets excitedly as she locates her purse on the side of the table. The waiter follows her up and after her single nod of acknowledgement, he places the menu in front of her.
"Good afternoon Mrs. Na" he timidly greets. Jeno realises that his hands are almost sweaty from the nervousness he is endeavoring to cover up on his stoic face.
The woman frowns, but it is noticeably a made-up one because her lips are still concaving upward.
"That's not how you used to call me, my son-in-law" she giggles elegantly.
Jeno's face lit up, for the certain reference to him.
"M-mom! You..aren't mad at me" As much as his excitement grows larger in his chest, the mouth is still hesitant to express that.
"Well..I was. Being mad was acutally an understatement Jeno"
The man's head bows low, slowly getting rid of the guilt consuming his mind.
But the lady mindfully continues, " So how do you think about taking care of this matter?"
Jeno confusely looks up. By any means, he never expect the woman to be hinting out so many things to him. He was just getting ready to be scolded, slapped or even worse in the form of public shaming. But this isn't what he expected this would look like.
"What do you mean, mom?"
"Lee Jeno. Promise me that you will protect Jaemin no matter what"
The woman visibly sees a glimpse of light that passes throught Jeno's eyes after she mentions this. He expresses a dedication of his strong protection of her son and she expects nothing less than Jeno's initial capabilities.
"Nana...is my hope, mom. He's the only person that I feel the will to protect ever since I met him."
Jeno is a sharp businessman. He usually picks up the expression of the other side whenever he's conversing but the lady is something different. She's unpredictable and her wisdom is something Jeno can't figure out immediately.
"I know everything."
"W-what?"
"I am aware of what had happened to my son and you." She sips on the water and calmly puts back down. " Jaemin....he's so much of a hesitant person Jeno. And you know about that as much as I do. I don't intend to say it out to you but your mother is someone who I can never forgive."
Jeno sinks down in guilt. He knows it wasn't him who planned all this but the guilt is for his weakness in protecting Jaemin from his own mother.
"But that doesn't mean I disapprove Jaemin's relationship with you. He loves you so much and I can't do anything about it..."
"he is still refusing to live with me"
"But he isn't refusing the fact that you are beside him"
Jeno nods in agreement. He also feels thankful for Jaemin allowing him to be next to him.
"I still need to know about the daughter of the Choi Enterprise" her voice is neutrally clear but the tone indicates the displeasing attituide on the mentioned name.
"A-about that.." Jeno sighs out loud. He doesn't expect him to be this helpless, handling his own life. The fact that he promised her to protect her son but then being in this stage about his life makes him furious over himself. But what can he do? He needs to seek for help if he needs one.
"I..I need your help mom"
🍁
Haechan and Yeri accidently look at each other, confused.
They didn't sign up for this but yet, they have to witness the scene unfolding in front of them.
"Can you stop touching my cheeks?" Chenle scolds.
"But they are so puffy and soft!" Jisung reasons. His hands are still holding on to Chenle's cheeks and the Chinese is not having it at all.
This isn't even their break time but Haechan is sick of seeing the two youngest flirting in front of his single salad.
He just came out of his office to ask for last week's data from Yeri but he isn't ready for the two to be already arguing.
"Will you do something about them?" Yeri asks. She already gives up on being in between the two so she is suggesting if Haechan would do something about it.
"Nah.. I am going to leave them like that" he responds with a small smile.
"Oh right Haechan! I want to ask you something"
"Yea?"
She leans in closer to Haechan, dragging her chair along the way. The tan male looks at her curiously, but their friendship too close enough not to feel uncomfortable from the distance they are sharing.
"Are you dating someone?"
"what?...w-what makes you say that?" he defends while trying not to song so defensive because it will just raise out so many doubts that he does not want to satisfy.
"I don't know! Just guessing, I guess" she carefreely jokes and Haechan smiles along.
"You crazy aunt!" he jokingly insults, which results in an arm slap.
"Don't you dare call me that again!"
"Why?"
Her annoyed frown immediately changes into a smirk as her neat brown eyebrows raises high. Then she whispers, "If I am an aunt, then Irene unnie would be our grandmother"
Haechan fakes a sorrowful cry and acts along with Yeri as she holds her sad pout. A few seconds later, they break down into a melody of laughter so loud that Irene and the two youngers look at them.
Irene folds her arms to show that their noise level needs to be brought down but Yeri does not seem to be intimidated from it.
"Alright! I will be back in my office before our grandma scolds us again"
On the way back to office, Haechan pushes Chenle's chair with his butt which causes the young boy to lean forward but Jisung's quick catch makes him land on his shoulder instead. Haechan encounters Jisung's intimidating sharp stare for a split second before knowingly bows and mouths a 'thank you' to Haechan. The older one just smirks and winks back as he makes his way back.
"Are you okay Lele?" Jisung pats Chenle's shoulder.
"Y-yea...umm...thank you" he recomposes his posture by straightening his back so that his body isn't in Jisung's chest anymore. A brief second inside the male's chest and yet he feels like burning alive. He almost squeals and sweats but then it is most likely that his mind is exaggerating because he couldn't hold in his own beating records.
"Lele"
"w-what?"
"Are you free this weekend?"
"huh?"
"I asked if you are free for this weekend. What are you going to do on the off day?"
"I don't know. Probably I'll be scratching my feet due to boredom"
The younger one beams to the answer.
"Then.... do you want to go on a date with me?" he asks with a bright smile.
"Park Jisung?! Don't joke around"
The smile on Jisung's face fades out. The lenses of the eyes contracts in, showing the change in dedication by detail. Chenle has never seen his friend being this serious, or looking this serious. Therefore, he does not know how to react to the sudden change of atmosphere.
"You think I am joking around?" his usual warm tone changes into a deep, intimidating voice and Chenle instantly backs off. Jisung, however, does not allow this to happen as he pulls back the chair by its arms and drags closer to him.
"J-Jisung...what are you doing? T-there are many people here" Chenle doesn't know why he points that fact out but he kind of feels more relaxed since the distance Jisung keeps shortening becomes to be aware by the youngest himself.
"Alright, Lele! Since you are thinking that I've been joking around this whole time, I need to make this official." He stands up abruptly, startling Chenle and everyone else in the room, including Haechan who comes out again to take the file he forgot on Yeri's desk.
Irene is about to be pissed off again from the loud noise by then get carried away since the two are staring each other like they are the only ones in this entire room.
"Give me your hands" Jisung kindly commands, looking at the glowing eyes underneath him.
Chenle feels like he's too small today in front of Jisung. Not that he isn't the other days since Jisung always towers his height over him but then today is different. It must be because of the fact that Jisung is standing up in front of him and he is sitting down. Or it must be because Jisung's usual warm voice is converting into a untamed deep voice that sends chill all over Chenle's body. It must be because of Jisung's unusual serious side that Chenle isn't familiar of.
"W-why?"
Without answering back to Chenle's question, Jisung grabs his hands gently without permission. Haechan holds in the gasp while covering his mouth but with his eyes wide open. He couldn't believe the scene that is happening before him. Too much excitement embraces his heart that he doesn't realize Jaemin who has come to stand beside him.
Jaemin, who is as surprised as everyone on the floor, has also been forced to stop his thinking since all he can concentrate right now is the couple in front of his eyes.
"Because I am taking you as mine ,Lele" he confidently speaks out in a voice that is loud enough for everyone to hear. A kiss lands on Chenle's soft baby palm and Jisung sweetly smiles as to how small the hand looks when he holds it up like this.
"W-what are you saying Jisung?"
"Chenle, listen carefully. I am now flirting with you. Why? Because I like you. I like you more than just a friend. I want you to be mine. That's why I am asking you out. I am courting you." he says with a smile and leaves everyone hanging on their mouths.
No one expects the youngest intern to be this brave and bold enough to confess and ask Chenle out in front of everyone. They have an idea or two about what Jisung thinks of Chenle but the usual shy and awkward intern's behaviors is unpredictable as for now.
Yeri stands up due to excitement and hops up and down, expressing how thrilled she is to observe the two young love birds. Haechan folds his arm and smiles like he is the father of Jisung who is proud of him.
"So...what is your answer for me Lele?"
"I...I don't-"
"Wait! I-If your answer is to refuse me, I am not ready for that yet" Jisung truthfully expresses, holding his chest with his right hand. "If that's that, then please give me some time to digest"
"Park Jisung! Pabo!" is what Chenle screams against Jisung's face before he runs out of the office due to embarrassment. Jisung stands there like a statue, not knowing how to react.
Everyone else, however, are giving out different signs for their youngest to react but he fails to communicate with them. Even Jaemin is scratching his hair due to the frustration but Haechan is the only one who snaps out of this and puts in some knowledge into Jisung's head.
"Park Jisung! What the hell are you doing here? Go and follow him!" he instructs strictly and only then Jisung's mind sticks back to his body. He starts to nervously panic and then quickly runs to follow Chenle.
-
"Lele! Chenle! Yah! Zhong Chenle! Chenle!"
At first, it was the embarrassment that boiled him up to run away out of everyone's sight but now, it is Jisung's returning warm tone that calls his name for him to stop that makes him even want to run away more. He follows where his feet lead him and now they are fixed on the staircase of their floor where anyone barely uses ever since Jaemin installs an elevator in this building.
"Lele!" Jisung finally catches up and he makes the Chinese faces to him.
Chenle looks up but then quickly looks down because Jisung's heavy breathing looks so captivating to him.
"Lele...Are you mad at me?" he tightly holds Chenle's hand and asks with apologizing eyes.
The Chinese shakes his head, still not daring to look up.
"Then... Are you disappointed?" he shakes his head again.
"Then...Are you-"
"Stop asking me questions. I am not mad at you or anything" Chenle clarifies but that does not seem to cool down Jisung's uprising concerns.
"But...you don't even want to look at me Lele. What am I supposed to think about all this? I am about to regret for confessing out so suddenly"
Chenle slowly gathers up some courage to stare right back up the welcoming eyes of Jisung. They unexpectedly soothes his shaking hands and gives him warm comfort.
"J-Jisung ah...I-I thought you liked Yeri Nuna"
"What?! Y-Yeri Nuna? The Aunt Nuna?"
Jisung's eyes widened in complete shock and his mind tries to complete the confusing puzzle that Chenle laid it out for him. Never in a million time does he acts like he is interested into Yeri but this adorable one out here thought that he is. He doesn't know where this comes from but this kind of explains why Chenle has been trying to avoid him or push him away whenever he gets too close to him. It also explains why he always act so cold toward him when he comes back with Yeri from observing art galleries.
The Chinese nods his head innocently and Jisung wants to squish his puffy cheeks as a punishment for thinking that. But once again, he is too tiny and precious that Jisung can forgive this boy easily. He knows he is so whipped for this Chinese.
"Aigoo...you scared me to death, Lele! I thought you hated me for something else! I was trying to figure out why you were suddenly distancing yourself from me. It turns out that you've misunderstood!" he happily explains.
"What does that mean? That I misunderstood?"
"Listen to me carefully, you small little bean" Chenle blinks his eyes a few times, listening attentively to Jisung as directed. "No, I am not interested in Yeri Nuna in a romantic way. She is like my aunt, blabbering too many things into my ears everyday. It is you, Zhong Chenle, that I have so many interest in a romantic way. I like to think of you as mine and every time you ran away from me, it was like a reality check for me."
"T-That means you like me?"
"I am still confused between like and love but yes, I like you so much Chenle"
"But you still need my answer"
Jisung's face suddenly become stoic from the instant nervousness he absorbs. He bites his bottom lip and breathes out loud, patiently waiting for an answer.
But the answer does not come.
So he looks into Chenle's eyes but he doesn't know how to read the meaning behind those wonderful eyes.
"Lele?"
"C-can this be..m-my answer?"
Just before Jisung could give out a confused expression, Chenle tip-toes using Jisung's shoulder as a support to give a soft peck on the lips.
Then, he shyly withdraws away from the face with a blush.
Jisung's mind, once again, resigned for a couple seconds and then logs back in with a bright smile.
"I....Is this...Is this a yes?"
Chenle nods, hiding away his smile.
"T-Then that means that you are mine?"
Chenle nods again, listening carefully to his boyfriend's endless questions.
"So...I am yours as well?"
"Imhm"
"That means that I can hold your hands even in public?"
"Imhm"
"hug you anytime I want?"
"...Imhm"
"Walk you back home after work?"
"..yes.."
"Take you out for dinners"
"Imhm.."
"Kiss you?"
"imh-..huh?"
"answer me Lele...Does that means that I can kiss you without needing to come up with an excuse?"
"y-ye-yes"
"So...Can I kiss you now?"
Chenle answers to this by completely closing his eyes, allowing Jisung to collect his body by his waist. As he feels a big palm that cups his cheek, he knowingly raises his face upward. A smile appears on Jisung's lips when he sees an adorable face that appears so close to him. After caressing the cheek a couple of time, he presses his lips over the soft one.
Chenle reacts by holding on to Jisung's nape and brings himself closer. Every time, he feels the wetness on his lip, Chenle shivers to the feeling of being kissed by Jisung's unexperienced lips.
As much as he adores Jisung being clueless about how to kiss him, Chenle grows impatience because all Jisung does is holding on to his upper lip and not doing anything with it. So he push off a bit, clearly not fully satisfied with it.
"I-I am sorry Lele..I've never kissed anyone... I mean...we've kissed before but it wasn't like this."
Chenle just smiles and nods to show that he understands him well.
"It's okay...I don't think I am ready for being kissed like that by you yet" he playfully pecks on Jisung's cheek and runs away again to enter the office.
"Wait! What do.............you mean by that?"
🍁
"Oh hey! Na Jaem! I didn't see you back there woops" Haechan shyly scratches his nape since without knowing, he backs off after witnessing the potential couple's confessing and he accidently steps on Jaemin's foot.
"It's okay Hyuck. Can I see you in my office for a minute?"
"Yea sure!"
Haechan observes the face of the artist that is heavily weighted down from the unfortunate encounter this morning. Jaemin looks okay but deep down in his mind, Haechan already notices that he isn't feeling so well. To Haechan, Jaemin is like a fresh rose in his garden and he knows the condition just by a glimpse of observation.
"What is it Jaem?"
"well, I am thinking about this" Jaemin points out to the screen that is left open on his desk and Haechan immediately picks up the letters on the file.
After reading the last drop of letter with awe and excitement in his stomach, Haechan looks back at Jaemin who is holding almost the replica of his expression.
"Your mom is back!"
🍁
"Starting from today, you'll have to live back with you mother"
Jeno recalls a specific instruction that was given to him this morning. Even though he feels like throwing up from recalling back the voice of an acidic sly voice, he has to hold it in not to appear anything else than what she wants him to be.
That kiss, that stupid kiss they shared this morning is nothing but a disgusting experience for him. He washed his mouth right after it, hoping that it wouldn't stain.
"Jeno! Son, you are back!"
A voice full of complete excitement rings in his ear as soon as he enters the doorstep. Following his mother is Choi Hana, who leans against the door with her arms fold tightly. A visible smile of victory is printed on her lips as she observes Jeno.
"Hana, such a sweet girl! You bring back my son to me"
She tightly hugs Jeno's waist and looks back at Hana with a satisfied smile.
Only then, Hana's smirk switches into a sweet and fruitful one that gives off a flowery sense of expression on the woman as well.
"I didn't do anything Lee Omma. It was Jeno Oppa who easily agreed when I told him that you miss him so bad"
The woman is easily absorbed into the obvious lie and she thanks her for bringing back Jeno to her.
Ever since Jeno decided to live out in that house, she was worried if he might be staying with Jaemin. Now that he is in front of her eyes, she can confirm about the two's locations anytime she wants to.
"Come on Jeno. Hana cooked us a special dinner for us. Your dad will be here any minutes" she informs lively and brings Jeno by his arms into the house.
Jeno clenches his jaw tight, just so he wouldn't do anything that is completely out of his control. As for now, he needs to be controlling all of his authority and thus, he will lead himself out of the trap.
"Wise choice Oppa. You really know what your situation is right now. It's always your best interest to follow what I say" Hana whispers into Jeno's ears as his mom excitedly walks to the kitchen and they follow behind.
Jeno controlls his breath, not easing along with the temper he is holding in. His eyes strictly is fixed in one place, showing he much he is keeping himself not to let out anything.
He swallows back the word he wants to pour out with a single deep breathe and continues to walk inside the dining room. At least, he needs to be out of Choi Hana's sight in order to release his anger and this simply isn't the time yet.
Time will come, Choi Hana.
You should enjoy your victory while you can as it won't last for long.
-
Everyone laughs at the joke Hana just made but Jeno remains unbothered. Actually, he doesn't even know that she just made a joke or not because he wasn't paying attention anyways. Since his dad and his mom laughed, he simply assumed that it was a joke.
Jeno's dad gives his wife a glare when he notices Jeno's static behavior at the dinner table. The old man thinks the night is lovely and that the dinner is elegantly presented for the family but his son seems to be off the direction that this dinner is supposed to serve.
Noticing the invisible string of eye contact, Hana decides that she would interfere to disrupt it.
"Here Lee Appa! This is the chilli shrimp. It's called chilli shrimp but I made it less spicy because Lee Omma told me that you don't enjoy spicy dishes." She sweetly infroms as she passes the curry on to the man's plate.
"Oh! Thank you dear. I didn't notice that you talked about this to Hana" After thanking Hana, he directs his attention to his wife.
"Oh no, honey! Hana asked me everything about this family. She always wanted to cook us a meal and this time, she has the time to do it and Jeno is back! How lovely" she chirps.
"Jeno, son! Are you not feeling well? You look tired" his dad calls out. He didn't mean to but then he is displeased seeing his son this weak looking after a long come back to home.
"Oh! It's nothing Dad. Just thinking about stuff from company"
"Hm...You are handling things well Jeno! Keep up" he encourages with a smile to which Jeno returns a small one.
"O-oppa..this is for you"
Hana justifies the timing exactly and puts in a spoonful of curry into Jeno's plate. He looks at her annoyingly but Hana glares at the curry back and then at his mom. Jeno finally sighs and finishes them off in his mouth so that she wouldn't butt in even in the dinner table.
"Mom! Dad! Pardon me..I am a bit tired today so I am going to rest now. Have a great night!"
He stands up and even without anyone dismissing, he makes his absence known. The two ladies do not complain anything since they are satisifed with Jeno for now but it is guranteed that they expect more than this in the future. For now, Jeno is going according to Hana's plan and she knows she can't push much more than this for now.
She just needs to be a sweet, little girl in front of his parents and then control him from behind.
Lee Jeno. You aren't that special but your rebellious behaviors make me want you more. Blame it all to yourself for making me gain more interest in you.
-
To Nana,
Babe, can I see you? Please pick up my calls. I love you.
Jeno re-reads his text message for a million time already. He sent this after the dinner and even after the late shower, Jaemin hasn't reply to him yet. He didn't pick up his phone either and it's making him worry.
He knows the reason why Jaemin is acting like this. He knows what his mom did to him and he, himself had the biggest struggle not to yell at his mom and threaten her not touch Jaemin ever again. If he did that, it would be a waste after he has reached this far in his plan.
Jaemin is an extremely senstive person and that makes Jeno goes crazy whenever he can't protect that sweet human being away from the evil intentions of people.
Jeno throws his phone close to him and rests his head on the head board. He couldn't believe that he expects the cold shower to wash away some of his burdens when he is this hot-headed about all the weightful things occuring in his life.
Bzzbzz
He quickly pulls up the phone in his hand after hearing a notification.
He feels like his mood has been uplifted a thousand time after single text message from his most favorite person.
Sorry, I am just so busy with the new contract Jeno. Ttyl
The text is obviously composed in a lie but Jeno cares not about it. He is just happy that Jaemin still wants to talk to him..or at least has the mind to text him back.
It's okay baby. Sleep tight and don't stay up so late. I love you
Jeno sends the text back right after Jaemin's message enters.
It hurts him alot. It hurts him that he has to restrain himself not from mindlessly running to Jaemin and put him in the huge embrace. It stings him to soul that he isn't able to get Jaemin's warmth when he is needing it the most.
How he wishes that he is now in Jaemin's chest, sheltering the artist's sweetest warmth as he expresses how much he loves him...
How he wishes Jaemin's fingers to be playing through his hair as he comforts him...
How he wishes nothing but Jaemin's smiles that can heal every wounds in his heart...
🍁
"Bye Mom! Don't go out these days.. I heard so many crimes out at nights. Call me anytime you need something."
Haechan smiles brightly and kisses his mom a good night before he leaves the place. Dongsook isn't at home today for her field trip and even though he is so worried about his mom, he has an urgent meeting tomorrow that he needs to attend. However, the reliable neighbor who is also a close friend of his mom convinced Haechan that she will be with her for the night. That brings down the concern a bit but Haechan still takes a bus here to buy everything he thinks his mom might need. He even ran down the road to buy some butter breads for his mom in the nearest convenience store.His mom told him to go back early but he resisted, saying that he will leave only after dinner. The time is getting delayed until 8 and his mom has to scold him until he agrees to really leave.
Soon after the walk, the darkened street appears in front of Haechan and this time, he chuckles off to it. This road will always be a reminder of his first love story that he will cherish for ever. Out of many people, he has to fall in love with the Mark Lee. That's why it's impossible. He always want to reach out for the star and that's the reason why he fails.
The way he has that pair of piercing eyes. The way he can change his whole appearance from an intimidating person to the sweetest sillybean. The way he sounds like in the recording studio. The way he usually speaks.
"Lee Haechan"
The way he calls his name-wait!what?
"Lee Haechan!" He looks back and there the star is, leaning against the same yellow wall, under the lamp post.
"M-mark?"
"Down to earth finally! I thought you saw me" he chuckles and walks to him.
"W-why are you here again?"
Haechan asks. He knows he doesn't own this place and that Mark can walk pass this road if he wishes to but this encounter doesn't seem a coincident to him.
"I saw you..so I followed"
"What?"
"I was by the playground an hour ago. And I saw you running down to the convenient store and the ran back. So I thought I would wait."
"And you did!"
"Haha...yeah I did"
Mark stands beside Haechan and he smiles at him.
"Why do you come back? To see your mom again?" He asks and they start walking on the empty road.
"Yeah...I feel bad for leaving her in this environment. Here's not so safe"
Mark looks around in the dark area and immediately understands as to why Haechan might dislike this place.
"So are you looking for another place?"
"Not yet...this place is the closest to my sister's college and to my mom's doctor. I don't want them to move again and again. My sister's at this age now and I was never able to hold them in a stable place. I feel useless" he sighs out and let the night air passes through his messy locks.
"You are not useless" Mark starts as soon as they turn to their right , revealing the convenience store and the playground on the opposite side to it. "You look like you are single handedly supporting your family"
Haechan looks up at the sky for a moment and then nods, looking back at Mark.
"See? You are not useless. You are a smart and brave Pudu"
"What is a Pudu?" Haechan confusely asks. " I wanted to ask you since the last time you called me that"
"You want to know?"
Haechan nods and smiles widely, showing his excitement to know.
"Then..you have to accompany me in the playground. What do you say?"
"Sure!"
-
"Huh? That's a Pudu? What kind of animal is that?"
Haechan asks, eyes not leaving Mark's phone screen.
Those wide eyes, curious lips, cute nose, round face and a warm skin tone....he is a Pudu.Mark smiles at his own thought.
"They are a type of deer. They are the world's smallest deer"
"They are......cute" Haechan says with a small smile while searching for videos of the pudus drinking milk.
"Hey that's you! The last time, you were sipping on the chocolate milk exactly like that" Mark compares and Haechan frowns.
"No I don't look like that!"
"Well, how would you know? You don't know how you look like when you were drinking"
"But still..." he wants to complain but he couldn't continue since he has nothing to rebattle.
"Just admit it! You are a Pudu"
"I mean..it's more like a compliment to me so..."
The two break into silence again and the only noise is from the video Haechan is watching.
"I think I find myself a new hobby"
"What?"
"Watching Pudu videos" Haechan chuckles at himself.
"Yeah..watch Pudu videos whenever you are stressed out" Mark suggests to which Haechan nods in agreement.
"Oh right! Are you not worried about....your fans noticing you?"
Even though Mark looks chill, Haechan is a bit serious about the environment because they are in open public and Mark isn't wearing any mask or hat that idols usually do. He just puts on his thick hoodie and a pair of glasses that looks like it has presciption on it and not for a fancy purpose.
"Then...I will just run" he carefreely states. "I don't know..I just want to be free from everything"
"Mark.." haechan stops his swing and looks at Mark with an unpredictable gaze. "Do you mind if you stand up in a count of three?"
Haechan says that so quietly but Mark still manages to hear. His eyes are fixed only on Mark as if he is trying to avoid making an eye contact with another. Mark feels obnoxious in his stomach from this uneasy feeling but he decides he will follow what Haechan says.
"Just pretend like we are having a conversation okay?" He suggests and Mark nods.
"Ready?" He whispers. "One...two..three"
As soon as Mark balances himself on his feet, a warm hand collects his hand and grabs him until their hands interwine with each other. Then he is pulled roughly as if they were the ballons picked up by the night wind. Haechan paces up, not looking back and Mark follows every direction they are running off to. Once in a while, he looks back but to see no one following them but Haechan seems not to be bothered about it. He runs like there is no end and Mark doesn't come up with an excuse to stop their footsteps. Without any complains, he follows the lead and soon finds the run so blissful that the moment feels like the whole world terminates aside from them.
Everything has stopped...
Aside from the pacing footsteps that keep on running until the end of the world......
Aside from the beating hearts that is indicating something else other than just from the lack of oxygen just from running.....
Aside from the cutest melody of giggles in front of him that he feels like he can compose the prettiest structure of music right there just from memorizing those beautiful unique tones of his laughter.....
All so perfect, all so neat that he wishes this won't stop. The taste of freedom he has been mentioning all these times. The feeling of nostalgia that wraps his body around the memories of the carefree childhood. Reminiscing the familiar scent that embraces the warmth of his chest and calls out from the giggles of the happiness he is experiencing. This feeling....this warmth....and this scent.....
Was has he been missing out? What is it that he can't speak out but that is at the edge of his tongue? What is this feeling of emptiness that has been filling in again? What is this warmth? Is this....is this...the sense of security and completion that he used to have as a child...Who is this person?
"M-mark?!"
The sudden force that pulls back his hand terminates the whole movement and exhaustion kicks in without knowing. Both of them are left breathless but no one complains about their crazy blissful act.
"Why would you stop?" He questions with a giggle that warms Mark's heart again.
How is his simple smile doing alot of thing to my heart?
"I...I don't want us to get too far"
"Oh...you are right! Now we will have to walk back there"
"Do you want to rest or.."
"No that's fine! It's already 9pm"
"Okay..I'll drive you back home"
"That would have been so much help for me..thank you" Haechan thanks with a sincere gratitude.
"So...tell me about you Haechan"
"About me?? Why so suddenly?" He tilts his head to ask. His voice is cut in between words since he hasn't fully recovered from the heartful run they just had.
"I just want to know..it's okay if you are not comfortable"
"Well..it's not that. I am just curious as to why the mighty Mark Lee wants to know about a simple ordinary person like me"
"You are not ordinary! You are quite......something else for me" Mark admits truthfully. Although he used to feel offended by Haechan's sarcastic ments, he cannot refuse to acknowledge the simple, yet colorful life he has.
"I don't actually have many things to share. I was born without a father and my mom struggled among her relatives for having me. She managed to give birth to me without any help and worked her hardest for us to survive. She was never acknowledged for her hard efforts but I think she is the bravest woman alive in this entire life. She is my role model and she is my hero."
The smile on Mark's lips is an exact replica of Haechan's smile as he describe his mom.
"When I was 8, my dad came back. Out of nowhere, just like that. He gave us so many promises and I easily fall to believe him as well as my mom. But we just got high expectation of him. My mom and I were left behind with my sister being two months old in my mom's stomach..since then, I promised myself that I will be the only one who protects my family"
"...you...are amazing, Pudu" mark genuinely praises. To be honest, he doesn't expect this bright and happy human being to go through those hardships. He doesn't look like one and he isn't expressing like he had one. He calmly told his story as if he is ready to comfront anything and the bravery in this is just too much warmth for Mark.
"I...actually lack in that field" Mark speaks up. They have been walking for about ten minutes and they can already see the convenience store around the corner.
"I don't have a family so I don't know how it feels like to have one."
Haechan looks up, glittering water forming in his eyes.
"I wanted to be a famous idol so that I can find my family with it. I was hoping that if my name is known everywhere, then my family would come for me..but it has already been five years, Haechan. I...I don't know what I can do more"
Haechan stops for a moment and holds up to Mark's hand. He grabs it with his two hands, hoping to give the man some comfort as much as he can.
"I...I want my family too, Haechannie.."
Not being able to hang there anymore, Haechan throws himself into Mark's chest and hugs the man tight. He gently moves his cheek on Mark's chest, showing his way of comforting him. Like a soulless man, Mark follows along and sheds some tear but he is able to control himself more than Haechan. He hugs the soft body tight and provides a shelter for him. He pats on the back a few time, listening to the gentle sobs that are forming in his chest.
He doesn't know what it is but the teary looks in Haechan's eyes make him feel like he is loved. It makes him feel that someone actually cares him. It makes him feel like he is appreciated and that his worries are okay to be expressed. It makes him feel less pressured. Haechan makes him warm and loved.
"I think it is best to follow your heart" he says between the sobs and Mark makes an effort to listen to him carefully. "I used to have someone who promised me that he will stay beside me forever. But he eventually left me alone. And when I found him, he had already forgotten about me."
You are not alone, Haechan. You are with me.When I needed someone, you came to me. Even in the ordinary, I promise you that I will celebrate your preciousness.
I sincerely want to give you gift-like days
I feel like the need to stay by your side, Little Pudu.
Like a candlelight that never goes out,
my wish of you staying beside me seems like it'll come true.
______________________________________
Yereobum~
Please stay safe and avoid crowded places!
Anyways, i hope you enjoy the chapter and please understand my mistakes😭🥺💚