Justin retrieved Wyatt's car seat from the back of Joey's car, saving me from the unhappy task. He stood watch and talked me through safely fitting and then fastening Wyatt into the seat. It wasn't as daunting as I thought it would be, and I managed to do it pretty easily overall, meaning that in just a few minutes, we were driving off down the street.
"Is there anything else you need to do today?" He asked, his eyes fixed on the road ahead.
"Just going to the store. I have to get some formula, Reia was still breastfeeding."
I glanced behind me at Wyatt, who was happily cuddling and suckling his favourite stuffed teddy bear.
"Then we'll head there first, make sure that you can get everything you need before going back to yours."
My eyes darted back to his, my brows arching in a teasing manner at what he'd just said. He seemed to have realised his mistake as he swore under his breath, then ran his fingers through his hair, quickly casting a glance in my direction before attempting to back track.
"I didn't mean... I was trying to say-"
His stumbling attempt to clarify his meaning was rather amusing, but I took pity on him and let out a small laugh.
"It's alright, I knew what you meant."
He laughed in relief and smiled at me, coming to a stop at the traffic lights.
"Good. I wouldn't want you to think I was trying to take advantage or anything."
As I looked at him, I could see the genuine kindness that shone in him. There was no way that I could even begin to think that he was trying to take advantage. There was something that Justin just had. A quality of sorts that emanated from him, bathing everyone around him in a warmth. I'd felt it from the moment that he arrived this morning. The help that he gave was out of kindness, not hidden agendas.
"I don't think that at all." I replied honestly. "I'm very grateful for everything that you've done for me... for us, since yesterday."
The lights changed, and Justin dipped his head once in acknowledgement of my words.
"You're welcome." He said, releasing the handbrake and taking us forward.
"You don't have to take us to the store though. I don't expect you to spend your day off ferrying us around."
"Trust me, I don't mind. Besides, when you have a baby with you, you're best not to keep stopping and moving the little might around too much. That's how you end up with a bouncing bundle of hyperactivity."
He took us into town, and pulled up outside of the supermarket. I only needed to get some basic supplies. Nappies, wipes and formula. I went to get out of the car the same way that I always did, and then remembered Wyatt. Looking into the back, I saw that he was asleep, his teddy bear laying across his lap.
"It's okay, you go ahead, I'll keep him here with me. He's safe, I swear." Justin said reassuringly.
It felt strange to leave him alone with someone that I'd only known for a day. But Justin was a cop, and I trusted him. Besides, I had more than I knew how to handle, now on my plate. Another life to be responsible for, child to raise, to mould and to be there for. I was on my own for the foreseeable future in so many ways, I couldn't afford to refuse the help on the little things when it was offered.
"Thanks. I'll be as quick as I can." I said, picking up my purse and jumping out of the car.
Inside the store, I headed straight for the baby aisle. Stopping in front of the nappies and wipes, I just stared at them, the numerous brands and sizes, varieties and prices all swam through my head. I couldn't make head nor tail of them all. I had no idea how many minutes passed with me just standing there.
"We thought you'd got lost... or abducted." Justin said.
"How are there so many options?" I asked, feeling as though my entire body had gone into shock.
Wyatt's giggle sounded next to me, and I turned to see him sitting happily in Justin's arms. They made quite the adorable little pair, and I was relieved that they were both here. Justin handed him over to me, along with the teddy bear, which I promptly jiggled in front of Wyatt, much to his amusement.
"When in doubt, stick with the simplest options." He said, reaching forwards and picking up some wipes from the shelf, and holding them up for me. "The less ingredients the better, as natural as you can get them."
I nodded and Justin took the basket from where it sat at my feet. He tossed the wipes into it, and then turned for the nappies.
"Do you remember which nappies he had at home?"
I scanned the shelf, looking for the familiar packaging. Near the top, I saw the familiar pale blue coloured pack and pointed it out to Justin.
"I think it was those."
He nodded, reaching up to pick them up, his t-shirt riding up as he stretched, flashing his toned abs. Caught by surprise, I couldn't stop myself from looking. He rummaged the packs, looking for the right size, then with a small sound of success, he picked one up and lowered back down.
"These should be the right size for the little fella." He said, holding them up, and then dropping them into the basket.
"Now, formula." I added with dread.
We walked down the aisle a little further, stopping before a huge display of baby formula and bottles. Seeing yet another never ending selection, I was about ready to turn tail and run. But Justin seemed to have sensed that and reached out, plucking a blue container from the shelf.
"May I make a suggestion?" He asked.
"Oh, please do!"
He chuckled and showed me the container.
"My brother and sister have both used this brand, they've never had any issues with it at all."
"Then it's a done deal." I sighed, already looking forward to getting out of the damn aisle.
He agreed and placed it into the basket, beginning to walk further down the aisle, me and Wyatt following after him.
"That's twice you've saved me today."
Justin opened the boot and placed the shopping bag inside.
"These kinds of things can be overwhelming for anyone. Most people are prepared for it, and still find it hard. You've not had any preparation, it's not surprising that it's tricky to grasp. You're doing well."
"I'm just scared that I will mess something up, or that I'll let him down." I said, opening the door and lowering Wyatt into the seat.
I hadn't really meant to say those words, even though they were true. I saw Justin's understanding expression, a tinge of sadness in his eyes, and I busied myself with buckling Wyatt in, attempting to avert my gaze to avoid any awkwardness. There was silence, and then the sound of the boot closing. I stayed still, hiding there under the pretence of handing him his bear. When I heard the front door close, I felt it was safe to get back out. Exhaling the breath that I was holding in, I climbed back into the passenger seat, and closed the door behind me. I'd just buckled up my seatbelt, when I felt Justin's hand on my forearm. Tilting my head up automatically, I saw that he was looking intently back at me.
"You will mess up. Every parent, guardian, uncle, aunt... teacher, they all fuck up. But the important thing is to never give up. Take it on the chin, learn from it, and press on. As long as you do that... you'll never let him down."
He sounded so sure of what he was saying. As though it wasn't a mere opinion, as much as factual evidence. I could tell from the way he spoke, that he wholeheartedly believed every word of what he said, and not just the words that came out of his mouth... I felt like he believed in me too. And it was possibly one of the most touching and motivational things that had ever happened to me.