—POE—
I watch from a distance as Ben escorts Rey around the base, ignoring her angry glares and 'I can take care of myself' remarks. Honestly, the way he's been so protective over her the past few days almost makes me want to forgive him for taking me prisoner and torturing me. Almost.
Rey still hasn't said a word about what she saw in her nightmare. Though judging by the sorrowful way she looks at me and Finn now, I'm guessing it didn't end well for us. She says she's fine, but I've seen how jumpy she's been since it happened.
Finn comes sprinting into the hangar, sweating and out of breath. "They...Leia...mission...good...Rey..." he pants, doubled over in front of me. "Whew!"
I tighten the new heat shield on the side of my X-Wing's laser cannon, making a face as I try to process Finn's words. "Man, what? I don't speak whatever you just said." The heat shield pops off and falls to the ground. I step off the ladder to retrieve it, cursing under my breath.
"Leia, she cleared the mission," Finn wheezes, before slipping into a coughing fit. "I need to start running more," he croaks.
"What mission?" I demand.
"I dunno, but it involves Rey and Palpatine. Leia wants all officers to report for a briefing and strategy meeting in an hour." Finn coughs again and decides he needs to lay down in the middle of the grease-covered floor. "Oh, and apparently she recruited some amazing pilot from the Academy on Chandrila to help lead the mission."
"Shit!" I slam my fist against the ladder in frustration and the shield falls off again, landing on the ground in front of me. "Why did she put me in charge if she was gonna keep pulling stunts like this?" I shout, drawing attention from the other pilots in the hangar. "Was it a joke to her? Am I a joke?"
Finn struggles to sit up. "Poe, calm down. You know as well as I do that she'll never completely give up control. And I don't want her to. You can barely take care of yourself, let alone lead a fleet of intergalactic rebels."
"Gee! Thanks, pal. I appreciate your vote of confidence." I pick up the useless replacement part and toss it into the T-70's cockpit. "I need a shower. I'll see you in an hour." I storm off without waiting for a response. My temper isn't usually this bad, but between worrying about Rey, trying to make repairs, and attempting to lead the Resistance, my fuse is shorter than it's ever been.
I'm so distracted by my thoughts I don't see the girl turn a corner right in front of me. We collide and she stumbles, barely catching herself on the wall. "Watch it!" She snaps, glowering from behind a curtain of unruly hair.
"You ran into me! How about you watch it!" I retort, sorely lacking in the comeback department.
She gives me a disgusted once-over and spins on her heel with a huff, continuing down the corridor.
Great, now my mood is worse.
I look down at my stained white tank top, grimy hands, and ripped pants. Okay, maybe I deserved the look of disgust.
The hot shower helps to relieve some of the tension I feel, so by the time I change into fresh clothes and walk to the command center, I'm in a much more tolerant mood. Hopefully it lasts.
As soon as I enter the room, Leia flags me down. "Poe, good, you're here. Finn told me you weren't feeling well and might not make it. I'm glad you're feeling better."
I look around and spot my supposed best friend in the far corner, smiling innocently at me. "Much better. Thank you, General."
Leia perks up and waves someone over as I turn to take my seat. "Poe there's someone I'd like you to meet. This is Lieutenant Vali, our newest pilot."
Ah, there's that anger again.
I sigh and take a moment to compose myself before turning to meet him.
Or...her?
Green eyes widen in shock as the pilot looks me over. "It's you," she whispers, a blush creeping up her face.
"Me?" I ask, looking at Leia for assistance. She shakes her head, just as lost as I am. "I'm sorry, have we met?"
The girl—pilot—huffs indignantly. "You nearly knocked me down in the hallway not an hour ago!" She shouts, jabbing at my chest. "You could at least apologize, jerk."
My jaw drops. I hadn't recognized her. Guess she cleans up well.
Leia gasps quietly. "Mara Vali, this is General Poe Dameron, leader of Black Squadron, acting head of the Resistance."
I stand a little taller at Leia's embellished introduction, taking great pleasure in watching the color drain from the girl's face. "Nice to meet you, Mara," I drawl with a grin, holding out my hand. She shakes it after a few awkward moments of staring.
I take the opportunity to really look at her this time. She's several inches shorter than me, dressed in an orange flight suit, dark hair pulled back into a loose braid. Her eyes briefly meet mine but she looks away quickly.
"You any good, Vali?" I ask, crossing my arms over my chest.
"Huh?" She shakes her head, looking confused.
"Are you a good pilot?" I elaborate. "I need to know if you're gonna wind up getting me and my entire fleet killed."
She mirrors my position and stares me down, feigning confidence. "Graduated top of my class at the New Academy. So, yes, sir. I'm a good pilot."
"Have you seen any combat?" I press, knowing full well I've just escalated myself to full douchebag status.
She freezes. "Well, no, but I-"
"Then how do you know you're a good pilot? Practice runs and dogfight simulations don't mean shit out here. This is the real world, and you're not leading anyone until you can prove your worth. Got it?"
Mara swallows hard and glances quickly at Leia. "Yes, sir. Understood." She avoids eye contact as she walks quickly from the room.
"Poe Dameron, I'm disappointed in you." Leia shakes her head at me.
"What? You brought her in to lead squadrons, right? I'm just doing my job of making sure every time we take off it's not a suicide mission. I wasn't being rude, I was being honest. Good exam scores are fine and all, but the real test of a pilot is putting them in front of a fleet of TIE Fighters with nowhere to run and an entire squadron's fate resting on their shoulders." I realize my voice has increased in volume, drawing several curious stares from the room. "I can't put my faith in her yet," I tell Leia, quieter now. "I'm sorry, General."
"I understand, Poe," she says, a gentle smile curling her lips. "I trust your judgment and leadership. Just take it easy on her while she proves herself—which she will, in time. I recruited her for a reason. You'll see one day." Leia pats my hand and moves to the front of the conference table to call the room to order.
I sigh and follow her, putting my General face on.
—REY—
Ben and I sneak into the meeting at the last second. Poe watches irritably as we take our seats at the table of officers. I look away, knowing if I maintain eye contact I'll have his death on repeat in my mind.
"As I was saying," he sighs, "we're in the endgame, people. This is it. All we've done, all this time, has been leading to this moment. General Organa is going to brief us on the mission status now." He steps aside to let Leia speak.
"Thanks to my son, my brother, and our dear Rey, we were able to decipher enough of the Jedi texts to form the basis of our mission." Leia takes a deep breath and I see the glimmer of purpose in her eyes. "We've located an object known as a Sith wayfinder on the planet Mustafar. We have reason to believe this wayfinder contains the coordinates of Exegol, one of the old Sith worlds where Palpatine is currently in hiding. Ben and Rey will be traveling to Mustafar first thing tomorrow to retrieve the wayfinder; Black Squadron will be on standby in the system should they need backup."
"What about Palpatine? How are we going to stop him?" Lieutenant Connix asks.
"That's what we're here to discuss," Poe answers her. He dims the lights in the room and turns on the table's holoprojector. His voice is grim as he tells us the severity of this mission. It will be the riskiest yet. There will be casualties. He doesn't sugarcoat the fact that the odds are not in our favor. I'm filled with an impending sense of doom; the gravity of the fight we're facing weighs heavy on my shoulders. After all, Palpatine is my grandfather. The responsibility of fighting him should rest on me, and me alone. I can't bear the thought of anyone I love getting hurt, or worse.
I tune Poe out as he and the others start to discuss strategy. My mind wanders back to the nightmare, every detail remaining painfully etched in my brain. Was it a vision? It was horrifically realistic. I have to find a way to make sure it doesn't come to pass.
I jump when Ben's hand settles over mine, loosening my fingers from the fist I hadn't realized I'd clenched. The palm of my hand is red, painfully marked by my nails. Ben shoots me a questioning look, and I shake my head to tell him I'm fine. He keeps staring, and the heat in his eyes makes my insides liquefy.
At first, I was overwhelmed by the intensity with which he cared for me after the nightmare. I spent so much of my life completely independent that the idea of giving that up to rely on someone else was terrifying; in fact, if it were anyone but Ben, I wouldn't have been able to make myself that vulnerable.
I feel a surge of affection and appreciation for him. He squeezes my hand and smiles at me, making my heart swell. It's then that I notice my mind had drifted away from my nightmare, and the fear I'd felt just minutes before had evaporated.
The meeting drags on forever with my inability to focus on anything but the man sitting beside me. His very presence is my lifeline, the only thing keeping me from drowning in the sinking sands of dread.
An intense longing seizes me through the bond, and I look up at Ben. He's staring at me again, that strange glimmer in his eyes causing unfamiliar heat to pool in my belly. I can't tear my eyes away from him. What's happening to me?
At long last the meeting ends and Ben grabs my hand, dragging me from the command center before anyone can stop us to speak. I have to jog to keep up with his long stride, and the tension emanating from him sends my heart into a gallop. I can't tell what he's feeling, but it's strong, and it scares me.
"Where are we going?" I finally ask, hating the way my voice wavers.
"Away," is his gruff response.
The door to his quarters slides open and he yanks me inside, waiting until the door hisses shut.
"What are you-"
I'm cut off when he pulls me forcefully into his broad chest and tilts my face up with a gentle finger under my chin. His warmth instantly sweeps through my body and I melt into him. The light of the setting sun streams in through the window, casting him in an ethereal golden glow; his eyes are hooded and burn through me like fire.
I feel it again. That swirling heat, spreading through my limbs, yearning to be closer. I open myself to him, letting the Dyad take control the way it did in the cave.
His calloused hands come up to my face, holding me as if afraid I'll break in his grip. He doesn't say a word, but the desire in his eyes speaks volumes. I wrap my arms around his waist, fisting his shirt on his back, heart racing out of control because I have no idea what I'm doing. This is new territory for me, but it's absolutely thrilling.
My fingers drag up his body until they weave into his thick hair. He groans quietly, pulling my face toward his, and his lips catch mine in a searing kiss. My entire body lights up and he walks backward, pulling me with him until he hits the bed, never breaking our kiss. Then we spin and I find myself lying across his bed, panting slightly as I watch his gaze drag heavily down my body. He takes his time climbing onto the bed, and uncertainty crawls its way into my stomach.
Ben falters for a moment, hovering above me, eyes wild. "We can stop if you're not comfortable," he pants, voice hoarse. "I shouldn't have forced-"
"You didn't force me to do anything." I laugh breathlessly. "I just..." I pause and inhale deeply, "I've never done anything like this before. I don't know what to do."
"Neither have I," Ben says quietly. "Seems to be working out pretty well so far, though."
I smile and grip his shirt in my fists, pulling him down on top of me. He braces his hands on either side of my head, but the pressure of his body on mine is enough to make me dizzy with longing. He leans down until our noses are a breath apart, and I take the opportunity to trace my fingers lightly across his brow, down his nose, over his perfect lips. He shifts slightly and kisses the palm of my hand.
"You're beautiful." His voice is husky and soft and it makes my insides melt a little more.
"So are you," I murmur, threading my fingers through the soft waves at the nape of his neck. Several emotions cross his face, from bewilderment to confusion and finally settling on awe. He stares at me for another moment, face flushed, before finally closing the distance between us. I meet him halfway, pulling him into another kiss. As his mouth moves against mine, I'm overcome with emotion. In the midst of the insanity of my life, meeting Ben was like finding a glass of cool water in the midst of a burning desert. He smiles against my lips and I feel his reciprocation flood our bond.
Then he's kissing a slow line from my jaw down to my neck, sending delicious chills through every nerve in my body. I gasp at the sensation, arching into him, and he growls against my skin. Part of me is still scared of the intimacy, but I can't focus long enough to remember why. My every sense is overwhelmed by Ben. Everything is Ben, and I can't get enough.
My nails drag over his scalp as he makes his way back up to my mouth, scorching me with the heat of his kiss. Suddenly he pulls back and I've never seen anything so wildly beautiful. His hair is a mess, hanging across his face in tousled waves. His hazel eyes are wide, pupils blown, watching me with an intensity that fills me with desire. His pink, kiss-swollen lips are parted slightly.
"Rey," he pants. "If you want to stop, you have to tell me now. I don't have the best record when it comes to self control." His smile is breathtaking.
"Don't stop," I demand, trying to pull him back to me.
He shakes his head, resisting my pull. "If you're sure..." he waits for my nod. The smile falls from his face. "I just- if this is my last night with you-"
"Stop," I snap, pushing myself into a sitting position. "Don't say that. We're going to get through this. We're going to win."
"You don't know that!" He says, voice raised slightly. "We don't know what we're up against. Nothing is guaranteed." He runs a hand through his hair and sits back on his heels.
"You're right," I whisper. "But if I don't keep telling myself everything is going to be okay, I'll fall apart."
Ben looks up, eyes shining. "Look... all I ask is that we pretend, just for tonight, that we're not scared of what's coming next. Let this be the way we remember us. Just in case."
My heart shatters into a million pieces. I've been so focused on avoiding the thought of losing Ben that I'd refused to consider what I would do if this didn't go our way. Hot tears stream down my face and he reaches out to brush them away with a gentle touch. "Okay," I agree.
Ben tugs at my hands and I go willingly, sitting in his lap with my legs wrapped tightly around his waist. I kiss him like it's my last chance, and he matches me in equal desperation. My arms drape over his shoulders as his fingers trace down to my hips, lifting the hem of my shirt to grip the bare skin of my waist. My legs tighten around him, bringing our hips closer together, and we both gasp at the sudden pressure. His heat burns against me and my brain goes fuzzy.
I let my body take over and use the Force to flip him onto his back, settling on top of him, pressing my hips against his again. He stares up at me in wonder and I run my hands up his torso, pushing his shirt up as I go. His skin is like fire under mine, muscles tense beneath my touch. He sits up long enough to tug the shirt off and toss it across the room.
I take the opportunity to drink him in, watching his chest rise and fall with rapid breaths. His scars stand out against his pale skin and I lean down to kiss each puckered line. His hips buck up against mine and I can't help the moan that escapes me. Then he reaches up, gripping the hem of my shirt, a question in the hesitation of his hands. I freeze, suddenly afraid, but nod anyway. I have no reason not to trust him.
He sits up with me still in his lap, taking his time sliding the fabric up my torso. I lift my arms and allow him to tug my shirt up and over my head. Suddenly I feel too exposed, too vulnerable, and my arms wrap around my bare chest.
"You can put it back on if you want," Ben says softly. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable."
"No," I protest, slowly lowering my arms. "It's okay. It's okay."
His touch is achingly gentle against my body. I feel my tension fade away as we explore each other, memorizing every detail, basking in the sensation of being cherished. Before I know it there's nothing between us but skin, and my senses are completely overwhelmed by him. Everything after that is a blur of pleasure, pain, and so much love that I feel ready to burst. He takes his time, caring for me in a way that brings tears to my eyes, and when I fall asleep later with his strong arms wrapped around me, I know for a fact that I can't live without him. He has bewitched me, body and soul, and I love him.
Whatever tomorrow may bring, we'll get through it. We have to. Because I don't know what I'll do if we don't.
* * * * * * * * * *
—BEN—
I'm already awake when the sun begins to rise. Rey is still sound asleep, bare skin glowing in the early morning light. Knowing she slept through the night unbothered by unpleasant dreams brings a smile to my face. I never thought I'd grow so attached to someone; honestly, I hadn't thought it possible for someone to reciprocate these feelings. Rey is the best part of my life, and I know without her I'd be completely lost and without direction. She brought me back to life, and for that I owe her everything.
The thought makes me pause to consider the mission today. I have no idea what awaits us on Mustafar. It's not the idea of a fight that scares me, though. I'm terrified of losing myself again. I don't know if I have the strength to resist the pull of the Dark Side in a place like that. For years I idolized Vader, and now here I am about to willingly march into the epicenter of his power with the goal of retrieving an object that I would've literally killed for mere months ago. I glance at Rey again and realize it's not just my life at stake if I fall. It's hers, too.
She tries to hide it, but I know there's still darkness within her. It's in her blood, calling to her. I have to be strong for both of us now. I won't let her slip onto that path the way I did. If I give in, if I get too close to that edge, I'm afraid she'll fall with me.
She begins to stir and I watch as her arms reach above her head, stretching languidly. Her eyes open and immediately seek me out. "Good morning," she murmurs, voice sending a thrill up my spine.
"Good morning," I reply, smiling. "How do you feel?"
"Sore." She curls into the blankets on my bed and I pull her against my chest. "In a good way," she adds.
I chuckle. "I'm glad the experience wasn't too unpleasant for you, then."
"Far from it," she says. I feel her smile against my chest. "What about you? Did you...enjoy it?"
"To say I enjoyed it would be an immense understatement."
Her laugh makes my heart soar. "We should get up," she sighs several minutes later. "We'll be leaving soon."
"I'm not ready to get up," I groan. "I don't want this to end."
Rey ignores my protests and slips from my grasp, collecting her clothes from around the room. "Then let's get this mission over with so we can come back here and do it all over again," she teases, but her smile doesn't reach her eyes. The air between us is heavy.
We get dressed in silence. Just as the door slides open for us to leave, Rey stops me with a hand on my waist. "Kiss me," she commands. I obey willingly. "Now let's go get that wayfinder. We have a Jedi Order to build."
* * * * * * * * * *
—POE—
The sun has just risen by the time I arrive in the hangar, still yawning constantly. The main doors have already been opened and I see a silhouette standing on the ladder beside my X-Wing.
"Hey! What are you doing to my ship?" I shout, jogging toward the figure. I get closer and realize it's the new girl. "Mara, what the hell do you think you're doing?" I demand angrily.
She smirks at me and hops off the ladder, wiping the grease off her hands with a towel from my toolbox. "Proving myself. And saving your life, so, you're welcome."
I look up and notice a new heat shield has been installed, and seems to be holding steady. "How'd you get it to stay in place?"
"You were using the wrong parts," she explains, showing me the one I'd dropped countless times yesterday. "This one is only compatible with the KX9 Laser Cannon, which was used on the T-65 X-Wing. Your T-70 is equipped with the newer KX12 model, which has a completely different configuration."
I'm stunned into silence, truly impressed by her knowledge.
"You're welcome," she says again, grinning proudly.
"Thank you," I grumble. "That doesn't mean you can go around fixing everyone's ships. Especially mine. But thanks."
Mara looks at me expectantly. "So?"
I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose. "Fine. Suit up, you're with Black Squadron today."
"Really?" She squeaks, bouncing up and down. Then she notices my face and stops. "I mean, thank you, sir. You won't regret it."
"I better not."
She jogs off to get her flight suit and helmet, and I notice Rey and Ben walk into the hangar, expressions reflecting the seriousness of our mission. Ben nods solemnly at me and I offer my best reassuring smile.
BB-8 and I run through our pre-flight checks. All too soon the hangar is drowning in the sound of X-Wings roaring to life. Finn and the rest of the Resistance watch from a distance as one by one we take off, led by Rey and Ben in their transport.
This is just like any other mission, I tell myself. Everything is fine. We planned this out. Nothing will go wrong.
"Black Squadron, set your coordinates. Make the jump to lightspeed on my mark."
"Copy that, Black Leader."
"Coordinates set."
I double check my nav computer for the tenth time. "3..."
Deep breath.
"...2..."
Everything is going to be okay.
"...1."