"Can I come in?"
Devlin wondered why he was asking when he was already in.
"Shut the door please." She said moving to sit on her bed.
He did and walked slowly towards her, like a cat that was wary of its new owner. "Are you okay?"
She looked up at him and he saw sadness in her eyes. What a fool he'd been. When he was done with Bruce yesterday, he'd stayed awake all night planning how to best invade Bull's hideout, which was surprisingly not far from him. If he'd acted on impulse yesterday, he would have gone straight there, and no doubt would have been killed. A counterattack of such caliber needed careful planning, and that was what he'd been doing with Peter and Cody. His phone had been switched off, and everyone else's phones too. This morning, Ivan had woken him to tell him what had happened to Dore and that he'd driven Pamela back home.
The fact that he'd not been there with her when it'd happened made him mad. Dorothea had been like a mother to him, she'd been kind and loving and if her death had torn him as it had, he couldn't imagine what Pamela must be going through. He admired her though. She was strong.
"This question again?"
The sadness in her voice broke his heart. "I just want to know." He sat beside her. The bed squeaked in protest to adjust to his weight.
"Well, I answered that already. Yes, I am fine."
He used his hand to raise her face so that she would be looking at him. They kept looking into each other's eyes until Devlin started to notice that her eyes were glittering. He was wondering why until the tears rolled down her hers.
"No, I'm not... I'm not." She broke down and started to sob.
Devlin gathered her in his arms, whispering soothing words to her. He felt her pain, understood what she was going through, and wanted so much to ease her pain, hell, he wanted to erase it all from existence. Minutes later, she had calmed down but he was still holding her.
"Where were you? Why didn't you come for me? I thought you were still mad at me and you didn't want to come to see me."
"No, no, never. I could never be mad at you for so long." He kissed her forehead. "I love you and I'm so sorry for everything that happened. I – I dragged your family into this, I –"
"It's not your fault," She sat up and touched his face. "Please don't blame yourself."
"I can't help it, I –" He ran his fingers through his hair. "I wish I could.... put a bullet into Bull's head for taking everything I hold dear."
"Not everything," Pamela said quietly.
He smiled, his eyes misting with tears as Pamela brought her lips closer to his for a kiss. He moved towards her too, and their lips met, their hands clung unto each other, their breaths mingled and their souls united. It should have been a simple kiss, an 'I miss you' kiss, at least that was what Devlin had planned, he just never thought it would turn into a soul-searing, hot, yearning, passionate one.
The taste of her tongue drove him crazy, almost making him lose his sanity. Their bodies molded, and fit perfectly like they were sculpted separately by God just for each other. She slid her hand over his neck and he held her tiny waist, as their mouths moved in sync with the rhythmic beats of their hearts that seemed to now beat as one.
He didn't know when he started to unzip her jeans or when he slid her top over her head. She on the other hand, with unsteady fingers, tugged his shirttail from his waistband and started to unbutton his shirt. Devlin kissed her neck and shoulders. He unclipped her bra and tossed it aside. When his lips met hers again, they did so with ravenous hunger. He wrapped her in his arms and lay her on the bed. Her eyes closed, she stretched forth her hands to receive him but he hesitated, his eyes caressing her bare body and taking it all in.
With a sigh, he lowered himself towards her and kissed her taut nipples, making her give a little gasp at the back of her throat. The sound almost drove him crazy with passion, with desire, and lust for the woman he loves with all of his beings.
"I know the timing sucks," he said against her lips. "But –"
"It's fine," she interrupted with a smile and tightened her arms around him.
Her fingers went down to his zip and her hand bumped something and she jumped, catapulting herself to the rear end of the bed, her eyes wide in horror.
"What's the matter?"
She pointed down at his zip. "Is that.. is that a gun?"
Devlin kicked himself mentally. How could he have forgotten to disarm himself? He never went anywhere without his gun but he should have remembered that Pamela would be frightened if he brought a gun to her goddamned bedroom!
He whipped the gun from his gun hostler and tossed it on one of the seats in the room.
"See? It's gone."
He unbuckled his belt and removed the hostler. He started to unzip his jeans.
"Stop! stop, stop, stop. We're not doing this."
He was horrified. "What?
"You heard me."
"Pamela, please! I'm dying here."
"We'll have a funeral for you, don't worry."
He gave her a look and she laughed. "Fine. Lock the door."
Devlin grinned and did as he was told with a speed that was faster than that of light. And that was the last thing that was said for a very long time.
~
After that long time, they lay in bed, cuddling and basking in the aftermath of an intense lovemaking session. Pamela couldn't believe she finally let the boss have carnal knowledge of her. She couldn't believe they made love, and it had been the best experience of her life. She had needed the release and was glad she had had it with the man she loved with all her heart.
She looked up at him and saw that he looked.... distant. It was as if he was lost in thought or something. Her heart fell. Was he regretting this? Did he probably find her boring or unsatisfactory? Did he –
Oh no! Was all he'd done for her been because he wanted to sleep with her? Was his love a lie? If it was would he be holding her as tight as he was right now? Like she was his? What if –
He looked at her and laughed.
"What?" She whispered.
"What are you overthinking?"
"Me?" She played dumb.
He stroked her lips with his thumb. "Your facial expression is to die for."
She used her lips to cover his thumb and let him draw it out slowly. His expression turned dark with desire. Good. She still had that power over him. She sat up and adjusted the pillow to buffer her back.
"You're the one overthinking. What's wrong?"
He sighed and used his palm to rub his face. His fatigue was evident from up close. It was so evident that he was bothered, and all she wanted to do was to hold him, kiss him and love him until his haunted look receded from view forever.
"Bull." He literarily growled when he said it. "We found his hideout."
"You did? I can't believe Marcel has a hideout."
Devlin scoffed. "I find it hard to believe that Marcel is Bull."
"Really? But he killed my mom. He was at the hospital when it happened. The explosion happened at the safe house the very day I stupidly told him about the location."
"Hey," He sat up and took her hands in his. "Don't blame yourself for that."
Pamela's eyes misted. "I can't help it." She whispered and sniffled back the tears that were threatening to spill. Devlin took her in his arms.
"Don't, please. He'll pay for everything. In two days, we'll invade –"
"What?" She unhooked herself from his arms. "You'll what? Devlin, you could die!"
"I'll be fine. Don't worry, it'll be carefully planned."
She shook her head adamantly. "Please, my love, don't do it. I just found you, I cannot lose you." She began to sob.
Devlin hugged her. "I'll be back I promise. I'll be back for you, hey, look at me." He lifted her teary face and kissed her. "I'll be fine, I promise. I have all my boys and Peter and everyone."
"It's not worth it...." She sobbed.
"He shot your dad."
Pamela froze. "Excuse me?"
Devlin sighed, his expression sad. "Your dad's death was not an accident. It was not a stray bullet. It was an ambush set by Bull for your dad."
Pamela couldn't believe her ears. "Oh my God."
"I'm so sorry, I was.... looking for the right time to tell you, I didn't mean to spring this up on you like this."
Fresh tears welled up in her eyes and she burst into tears. Devlin hugged her and stroked her hair. Pamela couldn't take it anymore. Bull made her an orphan, turned her once-happy life into an empty shell that echoed sadness.
She looked into Devlin's face and said with determination, "Finish him off. You have to."
"You have my word."
She looked down at her hand. "And come back alive to me. Please." She swallowed against the painful knot that formed in her throat. "Promise me you'll –" Her voice shook and her throat tightened. "Promise me." She whispered.
He brushed her hair from her face and gave her a long, hard kiss. He kissed her nose, her eyes, her face. "Is getting married a good enough promise?"
"What? Are you drunk?"
"Let's get married." He repeated, his facial expression very serious.
"You're kidding, right?"
He did nothing but give her that piercing look of his and Pamela's eyes widened in shock when she saw he meant what he was saying and that he was completely sober and sane.
"Oh my goodness you can't be serious!" She stood and dragged the blanket with her to cover her body while Devlin lay gloriously naked.
She walked to her closet to put on a robe. When she came back Devlin was still naked. She almost choked on air. Seeing him naked was a lot to get used to. She hoped with every fiber of her being that she would be given the chance to get used to his naked body lying with careless abandon on her bed like he was born there.
"I am." He propped his chin on one hand as he lay facing her sideways.
"You – you –"
"When did you begin to stammer? I have a soft spot for those that stammer, but boy when they get angry, it's like wrestling a tsunami."
"Devlin!" Pamela stomped her foot. "Put some clothes on, please."
Devlin smirked and took his time to put on his jeans but didn't buckle his fly. He mock-bowed when he was done.
"Now, what were you saying about getting married?"
"I want us to get married." He walked slowly towards her. "Now."
Pamela's eyes widened, so much so that she expected her eyeballs to pop out. "Are you – what are you – you've got to be –"
He hugged her and whispered directly to her ears. "I'm not. I want you to be my wife. Now. Today. Forever."
Pamela shoved him away and shrieked. "What? Now? What about guests? What would I wear? I don't have any dresses! Okay, well I could wear my mom's dress but – oh God no, I can't agree to this – this – insanity!"
Despite her restlessness, Devlin was as calm as a millpond. He raised a brow at her. "And why not?"
"Well, this is not how I imagined my proposal would be. I expected flowers and music – violin music to be precise, I expected a lot of balloons and stuff like that. Most importantly I expected a goddamned –"
She drew up short when he went on one knee and offered her a tiny shinning circle.
"Ring." Pamela completed.
"Happy now?" He took her hand to insert the ring but she yanked it away.
"Where are the words?"
"I said them already, like fifteen times."
"Say them again. I want to hear it. And this ring, I'll get a feminine one right? I know you slipped it off your finger just now."
Devlin began to stand. "You're wasting my time."
"No!" She pushed him back with so much force that she joined him on the floor with her two knees, and offered her hand. "This is the worst proposal of my life."
He laughed as he inserted the ring. "It's going to be the only proposal you'll get, trust me."
They kissed. "There's a church, not far from here, about twenty minutes drive."
Devlin grinned. "Let's do this. Let's make you Mrs. Gusev."
~
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