Chapter 21
The next morning, my mind is haunted with memories of Connor in the club. I'm covered in sweat by the time I wake up from the nightmares. As I lay in the bed, Connor's swollen, red face is all I can think about. Wondering what would have taken place if Tory and the gang weren't there makes it harder to breathe. Needless to say, I'm on full alert. So, when my bedroom door creaks open, all rationality exits the room. My head snaps towards the door; my eyes are wide with anticipation.
Paryis' little leg sticks through the door first. I sigh a long sigh, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I'm not sure who I expected to see in my house at 8 in the morning. After last night, I can't help but feel like anything is possible. Seeing Connor do nine lines of coke has scarred me for life.
"What you doing up?" I ask her.
Her eyes never moved from the floor so she didn't see me glaring at her when she came in. She must have thought I was asleep because she stops dead in her tracks. Her brown teddy bear hangs from her fingers.
"Can I sleep with you?" She asks.
"You know how I feel about you in my room. But I guess you could stay here just this time," I say.
I pat the side of the bed next to me so she can join. The truth is, I want Paryis to feel comfortable to come to me anytime. She doesn't have too many of us left with Mama as sad as she is and Ace gone in the wind. Her and Simon never had a close relationship to begin with so, that leaves me.
As much as I want her to know the door between is practically nonexistent, I'm having a hard time telling her that. I've been running Paryis out of my room all of her life. With all the changes in our lives, I feel the need to keep some things the same. Even the little shit matters when the whole world turns upside down.
She walks over slowly. She climbs onto the bed, snuggling beside me. The dark rings I noticed were under her eyes at the funeral, are still there. The look takes away all of the innocence she deserves to have. I can't help but wonder what her teachers must think.
"You okay?" I ask.
She nods her head robotically. Her eyes tell a different story, though. They're harder than they should be, an effect of all the death she's seen in the short 8 years she's lived. She's seen the same amount of bodies I have. It seems unfair that I've had years in between each horrific memory to unpack my emotions. Yet, her first memory was of her mother's overdose. She saw her dad get buried not long after and now Jonah too.
Take it from experience, no kid should have to cope with all that.
I pull her under my arm. I let her lay beside me, knowing her thrashes will kick in as soon as her eyes close. Until then, the least I could do is hold her.
While she's asleep, I take the opportunity to get dressed. I have a meeting with a financial planner at 9:30. Even though last night turned into a complete mess, I made what I needed to keep us afloat for awhile. But I know that security won't last forever. So in order to ensure we won't ever fall behind like we did, I have to meet with Caesar later on to discuss next steps for my business.
A promise is a promise, so I'll let him take the lead on scouting my new employees. There's only a few ideas I want to run by him.
In no time, my teeth are brushed, face is washed and hair is done. I slip on a pair of grey sweats and a tank top with my black Nike Forces. Today reeks of taking care of business, so there's no need to dress up for the occasion.
On my way out of my room, I double back to check on Paryis. In the short time I was getting dressed, the pillows were strewn over the floor and the blankets pushed away from her. Her teddy bear sits abandoned on the floor. Ipick her stuffed animal up to lay beside her. I'm tucking the bear into her arms when the black markings on the chest of the bear catch my attention.
"To my favorite girl. Happy VDay -Ace" is embroidered on the bear's white chest. I didn't realize this was the bear she kept by her side. My heart falls into my stomach. No matter how wide I leave my door open, I'll never be the big brother she needs to feel safe.
I put the bear next to her anyway. I hit the lights on my way out. If I couldn't be what Paryis wanted, then I'm determined to be what she needs.
Her tiny brain can't process the stress of paying bills. And she shouldn't have to. I'm gonna make sure she never has to upset her little mind with more adult matters than she already has to deal with.
...
Marcus, our financial advisor, seems surprised when he comes in the waiting room and finds me sitting there. He's white, average height and has dark hair turning white at the roots. He wears Tom Ford glasses, an expensive blue suit and a plastic smile. I'm sure his smile would be warmer if his payments didn't abruptly stop when Ace left. I don't expect that smile to return just 'cause I'm here. The few thousands I have in my purse can't afford his business by a long shot. But he's who my daddy trusted, who Ace trusted so now I'm hoping he'll trust me.
"Ms. Ortiz?" He asks.
I rise from the leather armchair. He unclasps his hands and reaches one out to me. I shake it, noticing how he squints at my outfit.
"You seem pretty young to be Mrs. Rochelle Ortiz, so I'm assuming you're her daughter. Candyce, is it?"
"Yes. My mother couldn't make it today. Neither could my brother, Ace. He's out of town right now so I'm in charge of our affairs at the moment."
"I understand. Can you follow me to my office?" He asks.
He leads me down a wide hallway to the first open door on our right. He ushers me in and closes the door behind us. I take a seat in the chair across from his desk, while he sits in the leather chair on the other side.
I waste no time getting to business.
"So, I'm sure you realize our family business has stalled for the time being. It's the reason why Ace isn't here right now and why your payments have stopped," I say.
Marcus leans back in his chair and folds one leg over his knee.
"I can understand how a business like your family's could run into some brick walls. Fortunately, walls can be knocked down, Ms. Ortiz. Of course that depends on who's responsible for putting the wall there in the first place."
I think carefully before I respond. He clearly knows what line of work our family is in. That's good. I figured as much but I didn't want to assume anything. Him knowing makes everything a lot easier. Hopefully he understands how quickly money can be made in our business. He must have some idea cause he's the one who dealt with Daddy's assets after he died. We never heard of Marcus until then, but he kept his loyalty to my dad by divvying up the money exactly how he asked. As far as I know, he never stole a penny from us. He left his business cards with Mama, who threw it away out of anger. Ace found it in the trash and kept it in his room. I never had reason to snoop in his room to find it until now. I'm only hoping I say the right things to get us his help again.
"Some might say it's an open and shut case. But no arrests have been made," I say.
Marcus squints at me behind his glasses. He waves his head for me to continue.
"I'll let my brother deal with knocking the wall down. For now, I can chip away at it brick by brick. I won't cover as much ground as Ace would have but I'll create a hole just big enough to hand you something on the other side. I can't promise to pay you everything up front, but you'll get what we owe you soon enough," I say.
Marcus places his hands under his chin. He purses his lip, considering my offer. When he comes up with the right words, he leans foward with his elbows on his desk.
"So you came here to ask for more time?" He asks.
"Yes."
"How much time?"
"A month."
He scoffs, "You expect me to trust that you'll pay me back for four months of back payments plus interest?"
"Yes."
"Doing what Santana and Ace did?"
I nod my head.
"Do you even know what you're getting yourself into, young lady?" Marcus asks.
I fiddle with my hands in my lap. It's true that I don't know what I'm doing. But that doesn't mean I won't get it done.
"The only way around a wall is to go through it, Marcus. You just gotta trust that I'll meet you on the other side, with everything I owe you and then some for your patience."
Marcus and I hold each other's stare for what feels like forever. After awhile, he scoots his chair back and stands up.
"Looks like you got the same balls Ace had when he came in here just a scrawny teen promising to take over his father's business. You just bought yourself a little more time, Ms. Ortiz. But let's be clear. You aren't Ace. The one time the payment is late, I'll take what I'm owed from the mortgage on the house and be done."
I don't take well to threats. Especially not those that concern putting my sister and brother out on the street but beggars can't be choosers. I shake his outstretched hand.
"There's one more thing, I need," I say.
Marcus looks like he's already had enough of me so I rush the words out.
"I need you to pay the rest of our bills."
Marcus laughs and drops my hand.
I reach into my purse and pull out the money Max and I made--with the exception of her cut. I sit the money on the table. Marcus looks down at it and then back to me. His eyebrows are pushed to the top of his scalp.
"I don't need to draw any extra attention to my family right now. If I go making payments in cash, everyone will be suspicious. I'm sure you can understand that right?" I ask.
I hate how whiny I sound asking this favor. I really need him to agree though. I'm not sure if we still have eyes on us or not but I can never be too careful. The more distance I put between myself and stacks of money like the ones on the table, the easier it will be conduct my business under wraps.
Marcus sighs, "There's always that one person who notices the girl chipping away at the brick, isn't there? I'll handle it for you."
I smile for the first time all morning.
"Thank you again, Marcus. You'll be seeing me very soon," I say.
I walk out of his office feeling the weight of the world detach from my shoulders. With the bills now paid, I can focus on building enough business to keep our cash flowing.
I wouldn't have been able to pay any bills if Max didn't take care of business first. I shoot her a text asking her to meet me at the Loft. I've decided that I want to keep her in the business. Since she helped me start this shit, she should also have a hand in deciding which girls has the most potential.
While I'm at it, I send a message to Caesar telling him to meet me there too. If he's gonna bring the girls around today, I want to give him a head's up that Max will be there. It's my second message to him today but he still doesn't answer.
My phone starts to vibrate, making the text thread with Caesar disappear. Ironically, Reese's name pops up on the screen. It occurs to me just then, that I haven't talked to him since our last night together two weeks ago.
"Hey," I answer.
"What's good, ma? I ain't heard from you ina while," He says.
"Yeah, I know."
I push open the doors of Marcus' building. Stepping into the sunlight, it's nearly blinding. I have to raise my hand to cover my eyes. The weather here makes no sense. It's the beginning of October and there hasn't been a breeze yet. There is no reason, I should be comfortable outside without a jacket on right now.
"Where you at? I hear cars and shit in ya background," Reese says.
"I'm taking care of some family stuff. Where are you?"
"I'm on the West Bank right now, headed home," He says.
"'Headed home'? So that mean you done for the day?" I ask.
"Nah. I'm going home to change my clothes. I been in the same fit for two days. It's been mad busy. That spot over on Algiers is going stir crazy. I don't think we have any competition over there. If we do, niggas shit ain't topping ours cause the feens is lining up! I'm going back there after I shower. You up for chilling in the trap with me?" He says.
Nothing sounds less appealing than sitting in a cookhouse watching Reese count money. Money is literally the one thing driving a gap between us now.
"No, I'm straight on that. I gotta meeting with Caesar today," I say.
Reese gets quiet.
"He ain't tell me he had no meeting with you."
"You talked to him? Cause I just hit him and he ain't text me back yet."
"Where y'all posed to be meeting at? Maybe I'll slide through."
"I'm not sure yet. That's why I need him to hit me back," I lie.
The last thing I need is Reese showing up unannounced to our meeting. He'll only seek to damage the business relationship Caese and I have built. I'm not willing to sacrifice that side of our friendship for some irrational fears Reese has. Don't get me wrong, I can see how Caesar abuses the already thin trust Reese has for me. I hate seeing the satisfaction on Caesar's face when he makes Reese jealous by just existing. At some point Reese has to realize the power he's giving to Caese. He's also stripping power away from me. 'Cause if Caese knows Reese still feels a way about us, then he must know Reese ain't feeling that way for no reason.
"Well if I see him, I'll put the word out. I gotta go," Reese says.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
Damn. It's like that?
I pull the phone away from my ear. Trying to console Reese's suspicions over Caesar is proving to be a waste of time. I could understand his frustration when I didn't tell him about seeing Caesar beforehand. But when I do tell him, he hangs up in my face?
I want to cater to Reese's insecurities but now isn't the time. He was getting to the money and now so am I. Right now, Caesar's helping me do that. Reese always put the money first, no matter how alone it made me feel. I won't allow myself to feel bad for doing the same thing.
A message notification alerts my screen, removing all thoughts of Reese's attitude. It's Max agreeing to our meeting.
I put in my request for a Lyft. The woman takes two minutes to pick me up. It takes her a little longer to drop me off since Marcus' company was located away's from the East Bank.
By the time she stops the car, I spot Max's blue Nissan in the parking lot.
I push open the doors to the Loft's entrance and head straight for the elevator. I press the button for the 3rd floor and wait while the elevator carries me up. Vonte is by the elevator doors when I get off. After speaking to him, I walk the familiar path to my own loft door. Fredo meets me a few feet away.
"Aye, that girl with the red hair came to see you. I saw you with her before so I just assumed," He says.
"You good, Fredo. You haven't seen Caesar though, have you?" I ask.
"Naw, boss. I'll be onna lookout for him though."
I thank him as I walk the last steps to my door. When I enter, Max is alone on the couch.
Thank God. I was sort of worried she would bring Phor, and her emotional ass would make this a lot harder. If Phor wasn't around, I'm sure Max and I can get straight to business without Max's loyalty to Phor getting in the way.
Max stands.
"You got me here. Wassup, Candyce?" She asks.
Instead of walking towards her, I go to the kitchen for a bottle of water. After a few sips, I call her over. She sits across from me at the kitchen counter while I stand by the sink.
"First things first, I'm grown enough to admit when I'm wrong. I was wrong to come at you crazy over you trying to take your cut. You put the work in so you should be rewarded. So, speaking of..."
I unzip my purse. At the very bottom is three stacks of cash, totaling to $1,500. I slide it across to her.
Her eyebrows go up. She flicks through the money. The familiar glint in her eyes is back. Max is a hustler so rightfully nothing can make her glow the way money can. I knew this about her and still denied her a cut of the money she worked for. It made sense then, and if given a second chance, I'll probably hold her money again. But I could have given her something to hold her over. Two friends working together is going to take a lot of work. We gotta respect each other's boundaries on a personal and business level.
"Thank you for the apology 'cause I was gon' get my cut either way," Max says.
"McCuse me bitch?"
Max fills the kitchen with laughter. I'm joining her as much as I can without choking on my water. After we both settle down, I continue with the apology.
"I think I just got stressed out when Phor ain't finish her sales. I told y'all I'm doing this for my family and that shit costs," I say.
Max nods her head, "I feel you. Living ain't cheap, girl."
"Right," I say.
The silence between us stretches out longer than I would have liked. I'm only quiet 'cause I'm trying to think of a good way to tell her that Phor is out of the group. Max can get a little touchy when it comes to Phor, so I wanna phrase it so that I'm not burning a bridge with her.
Before I can collect my thoughts, Max breaks the silence.
"You know, Candyce, I'm sorry too. I'm also grown enough to admit that I was acting a lil' shady when you came to us at Chantal's house," Max says.
"A 'lil'?" I ask.
"Okay, okay. I was acting real shady and that was fucked up. You came to us for help and I made it about me. I didn't like how you could distance yourself and then come back like nothing happened just 'cause you needed us. I went about it the wrong way though."
The "needed us" part of her apology makes me cringe but I don't correct it. Although, technically, I didn't need them. I only fought for them 'cause I trusted them. Still, now's not the time to point that out when Max is making amends.
"I mean, I understand where you coming from. My life got all fucked up so quickly that I guess it made me see shit differently. Either way, that shouldn't have stopped me from being a good friend, so I'm sorry...again," I say.
Max smiles but she ultimately waves my apology off. I wouldn't expect anything less. She was never one for the sentimental shit unless Phor was there to burst her bubble. That's the only person she let get close enough to see that side of her, which is fine by me. She had Phor and while we weren't on the best of terms right now, I had Chantal.
"Don't trip. We back making money just like we used to when you was still dancing. And if you still need money, why you don't just turn back to the club now that Ace is gone?" She asks.
"Honestly, stripping never occurred to me."
Now that I think about it, it would have been so much easier to go back to what I was used to. Even with Angel still out there, I'm sure I could have found work at another club. I doubt the nigga would have scoured the ends of the Earth looking for me. If that's the case, my ass would have been dead.
Among a long list of reasons, stripping was always a gamble. Sometimes I'd go home with a thousand. Other times, I'd go home with less than a hundred. Stripping started off as a way for me to gain my confidence back. Caesar leaving me how he did really did a number on my self-esteem. Performing as Kandi Redd helped me reinvent myself. Now it's time to grow in bigger and better ways.
"Anyways, I ain't call you over here just to make amends. I wanna know if you wanna keep working with me?" I ask.
"$1500 for one night? Girl, I'd be a dumbass to pass that up."
"Would you feel the same way if Phor stopping working with us?"
Max looks up from her phone. She stares off into the distance, most likely weighing the pros and cons of continuing doing business with me. After how I played Phor in the club last night, she'll probably feel betrayed if Max kept working for me. But the job did pay well. It was an easy decision to make if you asked me.
Finally, she says, "Phor's a big girl. Drug dealing just wasn't her thing."
I pay attention to more than what she says. Body language always gave someone's real feelings away. Unless someone was a psychopath or some shit, I could always read the subconscious moves they make after hearing something they didn't like. I can tell by the way Max grabs her purse that she feels a way about it. That's fine. As long as it doesn't get in the way of our business together.
"Good 'cause I don't know about you, but I'm not trying to waste no time getting plugged back in. I have to meet up with my friend to get more product but I can have it to you in the next few days. Also, I'll be bringing in more girls to take some of the weight off you."
Max shrugs her shoulders as if to say it doesn't matter one way or another to her.
"They gon be strippers too?" Max asks.
Her tone comes across a little bitchy but to save us another round of apologies in the future, I tuck my attitude and keep going.
"No. I mean, maybe one or two of them but it all depends. The stripclub is kinda your area since you got status there. They'll mostly be in nightclubs around the city," I say.
"Actually, I was hoping you could help me pick them. You and I know both know what it takes to get attention in a club. But, if last night taught me anything it's that I haven't been in the club scene for a minute. Maybe you'll see something in them I can't."
"I like the sound of that," Max smiles.
"Yeah, I thought you might," I say.
We make more small talk about gossip around the city. When I pick up my phone to visit TheShadeRoom's instagram page, I see two missed calls from Caesar. I excuse myself from the kitchen. For a sense of privacy, I move to the bedroom upstairs. There is no need for Max to know every detail about my connect, including his name and what the fuck was taking him so long.
The phone rings two times before he answers.
"What took you so long?" He says.
The audacity in that question is too much to unpack. Instead, I move on to the more important matters.
"Where are you?" I ask.
"Home. Where you at?" Caesar asks.
Does this nigga even check his messages?
"I'm at the Loft waiting for you. How long you gon' be?"
Caesar pauses. I groan under my breath. If he didn't check his messages to know that I said to meet up at the Loft then most likely he isn't coming. I try to give him a speedy recap.
"You don't remember our promise last night? You said you're gonna help me pick out the girls. Plus, I wanna run some ideas--"
"Oh, I remember. Nevermind that shit right now. Come over?"
"Come over?" I repeat.
"I'll text you my address but delete that shit right after."
I roll my eyes. Who the hell did he think was gonna be going through my phone to find his home address?
"Okay, Caesar."
I hang up the phone. I jog back down the stairs. Max is waiting in the living room now.
"They coming?" She asks.
"No. Change of plans. I'll text you with the plans for next time," I say.
She grabs her purse and I grab mine. We head for the door together but part ways once we step off the elevator. All the while I'm booking a Lyft and wondering what could be so important that Caesar wants to pump the brakes on our business venture. Let alone, why he wants to meet at his house to discuss it.
The ride to Caesar's house in Chalmette is a forty-minute drive. So, I guess I'll just have to buckle in until I can ask him face-to-face.
...
Through the window of the Lyft's car, Caesar's house looks grand and intimidating. Last time I was here, I was too traumatized from my run-in with Angel to fully take in the exterior of his house. Staring up at it now, I can finally appreciate the beauty of it. Black and grey wooden panels cover the square design of his house. The sleekness of the design steals my attention away from the issue at hand. Forty minutes of going over every possibility on the way here and I still haven't figured out what Caesar could possibly want.
I climb down from the Chevy pick-up and close the door behind me. The Lyft driver wastes no time driving away. The roaring of his engine is the the only sound on the block.
I begin walking to the door calmer than I was on the ride over. The ride granted me time to overthink the situation but now that I'm here, my mind has stopped racing. There's a 50/50 chance that whatever he has to say is either really good or really bad. Either way, it doesn't matter now. I'm here so all I can do is chill out until I know for sure.
I knock on the door twice. There's shuffling inside. I hear what sounds like a drawer open and close. Caesar opens the door just when I'm about to start knocking aggressively.
He stands in grey Nike sweats with a white wife beater on. Somehow we're matching. My attire was chosen on the basis of handling business today. So maybe Caesar was also about business today? There's a chance that he could have just not been about my business today.
His red and black tattoos are out in the open as always by them being on his neck. His other tattoos like his shoulder and chest piece are more of a surprise. I haven't seen them in so long that my eyes hover over them longer than they should have. Tattoos also run the length of his arm but they don't catch my attention either. Not because they're usually visible, but only cause the black gun in his hand typically isn't.
I understand having to be cautious. Then again, his closest neighbor is half a mile away and no one else knows where he lives. I even made the effort of deleting the message he sent with his address.
"Really, nigga? Who else were you expecting?" I ask.
Caesar smacks his teeth at me, but otherwise ignores me. He steps out of the door in his white socks. He walks the distance to his yard, checks down the street, then ushers me inside. Once the door is locked, the muscles between his shoulder blades relax.
"You can never be too careful," He says.
Despite his show of answering the door with a gun in hand, I'm more relaxed now that I'm in Caesar's presence. There's a small cabinet by the door that he sits his gun inside of. He walks further into his house so I follow.
The interior design is as beautiful as I remembered. The sofas are still starch white and soft to the touch. Though, I notice how Caesar side-eyes me running my fingers across the fabric. His protectiveness over his house falls in line perfectly with the makeup of it. The floors are freshly mopped. There's still a scent of Fabalouso in the air. Every countertop is spotless, except for the bowl and spoon sitting in the kitchen sink waiting to be washed. His mild case of OCD probably had him washing dishes before I came but gonna act like he James Bond to open the door.
I roll my eyes at Caesar's antics. I plop on the couch and look up at him.
"It seems like you just cleaned up. I'm happy to see that you stuck to yo roots with the cleaning supplies," I say.
Caesar sits on the arm of the couch I'm sitting on.
"First of all, every black person knows the power of Fabalouso," He says.
"Whatever you say, Mr. Clean," I whisper.
Caesar stands and laughs, "Yeah, whatever. Ion remember the last time I saw yo ass with a broom."
"'Cause I don't have OCD like you. Plus when was the last time you was at home? I'm sure you left it spotless before you left so you just cleaning for the fun of it?" I say.
"Actually, uninhabited places collect the most dust. I had to get this bitch back right," Caesar says.
Saying dorky shit like that makes it hard to believe there are people out there afraid of him.
Caesar moves away from the couch to sit on the coffee table in front of me. His shoulders are folded over his chest, making him look buff and semi-intimidating. But, the smile on his face gives him away. I can't help the small smile forming on my face too.
Being around Caesar has come to be less of a headache in the last few weeks. I went from ignoring him completely this summer to being in his face nearly every day. Joking with him has made it easy to set aside the reason behind our impromptu meeting but I still want to know why I was summoned over. It better be good since he asked me to ride past city limits to see him.
I scoot to the edge of the sofa. Caesar straightens his posture too. His smile slowly starts to fade away. I'm glad to know he didn't call me over here just to joke around.
I figure I should start with a recap of the day's events before he delivers the bad news. At this point, I can only assume it is bad news. The last time I was here, I was pulling myself together after Angel pointed a gun at my head. Then, I had to wait around idly while Caesar and Ace killed the man whose only job was to protect me. I guess I have a bad omen about this place. From the limited experience I have, I've only been invited here when shit goes terribly wrong.
"Before you say whatever you need to say, I wanna run something to you about my business."
"So run it then," Caesar says.
"Well I got Max to agree to keep working for me," I say.
I'm actually pretty proud that I squashed shit with her. Besides the fact that she used to be one of my closest girlfriends, I know that I can trust her. If Caesar is gonna follow through with bringing more girls in, I need someone I can trust to get to a bag without any do-overs or help needed. So, I'm hoping he doesn't rain all over my parade by talking shit about Max.
Luckily he has other shit on his mind 'cause he keeps it casual.
"What about the other one?" He says.
"Who Phor? Yeah, I had to cut her. It don't make sense to have her when I still had to go behind her to sell the shit," I say.
"One down. One more to go, huh?" He says.
I groan. He couldn't help himself, I guess.
"Is that all you gotta tell me?"
I replay the morning in my head. The only other thing I would tell him about is the meeting with Marcus, but I'm not. It doesn't make sense to hire a private consultant to handle money if I was just gonna go blab about it to everybody. Caesar's not everybody but like he said, I can never be too careful.
I nod my head.
"You made it sound like yo morning been exciting or something. All you did was make amends with yo bestie," He says.
By the casual tone of his voice, I know he doesn't mean anything by it. But saying it anyway sounds condescending as hell. I didn't just salvage a friendship, I secured the success of my business by doing so. I get that I'm doing shit differently than he would have, just like I'm aware we aren't nearly on the same levels. I don't appreciate my accomplishments being taken for a grain of salt either.
Naturally, my attitude pushes through as my defense mechanism.
"Well, you been in this bitch holed up all day so tell me what you been doing. What you want with me anyway?" I say.
Caesar squints at me. His eyes flicker over my face trying to grasp how shit went left so quickly. The man has no patience though, 'cause he moves on fast enough.
"It can't possibly top yours but if you need to know... I was bailing yo brother out of jail."
Jail?
My eyes buck out against my face.
My brother?
My eyebrows dip lower. My mind immediately tries to put the pieces together but trying to wrap my head around news like this is only swarming my brain with more thoughts. Like, which brother? Was it Ace? Was it Simon?
Now that I think about it, I don't recall seeing Simon in the house this morning. Plus, I haven't seen or heard from Ace in God knows how long. The suspense is deafening. I need answers now. Like right fucking now.
I rise from the sofa. All breathing techniques I've mastered since birth go flying out the window. The fuck was any one of my brothers doing in jail? But more importantly why the fuck didn't they call me? Why am I just finding out about this?
"What?"
All these questions running through my head and that's the only word able to get through.
Caesar continues sitting down. Bold of him cause if he doesn't answer these questions correctly, there's a 9/10 chance that my hand will be sliding across his face. I mean, how could he keep something like this from me? He really had to build up the suspense by asking me to come over? A text can go a long way.
"Sit down, bruh. Let me explain it to you before you start doing the most," Caesar says.
We past that.
I slap his hand away. I walk towards the kitchen to get a glass of water to calm myself down. He was right; we weren't gonna get anywhere if I wasn't calm. But he isn't gonna be the one to calm me down until I know the full story and also what part he played in this.
"He called me from the station last night. He said he got cross faded and fucked up some cop cars at the station. He kept asking for the cop that killed Jonah to come outside so..."
Caesar's words trail off. A pounding sounds in my ears. So it was Simon. Simon was in jail last night. While I was running a crime syndicate of my own at the club, my brother was being hoarded off to a jail cell. And I'm only now finding out about it.
"...so it took some time. I had to hit a few stash houses but I put up the bail and got him out."
"Why didn't you tell me about it last night?" I say.
"You was doing yo own thing. I ain't wanna bother you if it was some shit I could handle myself," Caesar says.
"He's my brother. I could've helped."
"You woulda made shit worse, Candyce. You couldn't help anyway. When I left the club last night, you had a little under 2k. Unless you had 10k more to put up, yo chump change wouldn't have made a difference."
He's right. Until Connor bought off the excess dope, I barely have two nickles to rub together. Still, I can't say I wouldn't have tried. I'm sacrificing everything I believe in just to watch out for my family. I want them to be safe at all times, even if that means putting myself at risk sometimes. That's the price you pay for family. It's the price I would have paid for Simon.
I take a deep breath. Stressing over what I could have done, does nothing to help Simon out now. The only thing I can do is get a grip on the situation before it spirals out of control.
"Where is Simon now?" I ask.
"I dropped him off at home this morning. I told him not to leave until I got shit figured out but I ain't his daddy. I don't know where that nigga at now," Caesar says.
So helpful yet so fucking useless.
"How you gonna figure this out? Ain't the next steps like a court date and shit?" I ask.
Caesar nods, "That's usually how it go. But I'ma see what I can do. Cam said Ace had a few cops on their payroll. I'm not sure if it's worth shit since he got that case pending but I'ma see wassup."
I breathe a sigh of relief. At the very least, Simon is out of jail. Imagining any of my brothers falling victim to the system is enough to make my heart clench. That's why as mad as I am at the way Ace handled things, I understand why he had to go. A life without Ace is proving to be much better than imagining him behind bars.
"Can you take me home?" I ask.
"Yeah. Let me change right quick. I'll be down in a second."
Caesar gets up from the coffee table. He makes his way to the stairs on the other side of the room. For all it's worth, at least he climbs the stairs two at a time. I'm itching with anticipation as I pull my phone to call Simon. It goes straight to voicemail.
As mad as I am, I can't blame Caesar. He helped Simon when he was in a tough place. He even raised the bail money to get him out of jail. In my right mind, I'd be appreciative. Now, I'm just angry.
Caesar comes down in the same sweatpants from before. The difference is he has a matching grey hoodie to match and Reebok classics on his feet.
He lingers at the base of the stairs with his keys in hand.
"Before we go Candyce, I need you to do something for me."
I'm already at the door with my bag in hand. I hesitantly walk back over to him.
"What?" I ask.
"I need you to tell Simon everything. As much as you know at least. Tell him all the shit that's happened since you got caught up with Angel."
"Why?" I ask.
"Cause we can't afford to have him out here flashing out on cops. We already got eyes on us from the shit that's happened with Ace," Caesar says.
He notes how conflicted I look before he continues.
"Look, everybody moving different, Red. I know you don't like hearing about this shit, but we been keeping everything under wraps. That means no bodies, no hits, and no attention. We gotta move smart if we want the Feds to stay out our way."
Caesar's making a lot of sense. Everything he's saying has occurred to me in some way or another but not in this mind frame. My first thought when Tory said Caesar wouldn't let him kill people was to assume that Caesar was doing the job himself. The whole time, Caesar retired his top hitter cause no beef is worth the risk of getting us caught. Simon targeting the police only plants us directly in their line of sight.
The only way Simon stops being a liability is to tell him everything that's happened. I just never know with Simon. I never expected him to bring a heap load of weed into Mama's house. I never expected him to go on a drinking binge and crash out on cop cars. Grief-stricken Simon is another Simon altogether.
"Okay," I say, "Just do what you can to help him."
Caesar chuckles, "It's funny how the lil' nigga became my responsibility anyway."
I remember Caesar refusing to help me identify Simon's plug. Caesar blatantly said Simon was my problem 'cause he was my brother. If only it was that easy.
"Welcome back to the family," I say.
I walk towards the door with a heavy head and heart. This entire time Simon's been blaming everyone else for Jonah's death, including Ace. How is he gonna feel when he finds out I'm partly responsible for the Fed raid that killed Jonah?