A month could barely pass for both parties. Lisa had a difficulty to make herself back to the old self who had nothing but hatred for Jennie.
Yes, she used to hate the latter; she didn't like her, not even a bit. For her, Jennie had every trait Lisa disliked in a woman which supposedly made her impossible to be loved by Lisa.
But hey, who could guess the fate, right? All of her confidence vanished in an instant. Perhaps couple of weeks ago, she could proudly say that she hated Jennie, but now? She couldn't even deny the fact that she's so in love with her annoying boss.
What about Jennie? She hated to admit that she felt different since the day Lisa admitted her defeat. She felt lonelier than before. Work used to be her priority aside of her family. In her mind was always about work, work, and work but sadly, now she had to share her mind to think about two things; work and Lisa.
It turned out that Lisa was a woman of her words. Since that Friday night, the younger woman never sent her message nor did she call Jennie anymore. She didn't even inform the latter whether she had arrived or not.
Jennie was restless that night. She couldn't sleep for some unknown reasons. She still however denied the cause of her insomnia was Lisa. She thought it was because of the upcoming project or well, anything as long as it's not Lisa.
As usual, Jennie would stay late at work but different from couple of weeks ago, she would spend her overtime alone. Lisa would send her report and all of her task lists for that day only when usually, the younger woman would try to help Jennie to do her work, to ease her mind from thinking about many outstanding tasks. It's not that Jennie was unable to do it on her own, it's just that she felt the office was much more quiet than before.
It was expected though, since Lisa had promised not to bother her anymore but she never knew she would feel this way, lonely and kind of lost. Usually, she never heard her stomach grumble because Lisa always assured her stomach would be filled just in time but since their separation, its totally different. Her stomach wouldn't stop making a noise and asked to be fed. It made her had to order delivery food or buy snacks beforehand.
Jennie always went home with her driver or sometimes she had to hail a cab when her task made her stay longer than 9 pm. However, her driver drove carelessly and sometimes he even sped up, making the woman feared and yelled at him.
Lisa always drove carefully, made sure Jennie had her seatbelt on before starting the engine.
Jennie massaged her head and sighed for the nth time. Today was Friday and she spent her Friday night alone at work, oh well maybe with securities outside. She took a glance at her wrist watch and saw it's passed 8 pm right now. Another hour she spent, and it was guaranteed, she would have to go home without her driver again. She looked at her piled up documents splattered and indirectly asked to be reviewed and verified.
She never hated work before but today, oh she hated it so much.
A month since Lisa stop courting her also meant a month since she stop spending her weekend to go on dates, to places which could excite her. She never went to movies anymore or to other places couple usually visited during weekend. She used to never be bothered by that fact but now, she felt fed up with work and needed entertainment.
But then again, who could entertain her when most of her friends spent their time with families? It was Lisa but now, Lisa was no longer there for her.
"No.. No.. I don't like her that way and I must not like her that way! If I need a lover, then it must be a man!" Jennie told herself, enchanting similar words for some minutes already.
She closed her laptop and decided it's done for today.
"Chaeng? Are you busy tomorrow?" Jennie made a call to her bestfriend while walking outside from the company building.
"Whoaa Jen.. It's not like everyday you make a call. What happened? When you're calling me, its either about you being lonely or when you need a place to tell your story and advise you about a thing or two. Which one is it now?"
"Hahaha.. Am I that bad? Well„ it's both now. So, are you free? Or have you made a plan with Jisoo for tomorrow?"
"Chu is in France right now. She's asked to make a comment on a well-known restaurant there. She will be home a week from now so yeah, I'm free." Chaeyoung answered.
Her wife was a famous food critic and she was an owner of a small restaurant. They met when Jisoo was sent to test the food in Chaeng's restaurant and so the story continued until they decided to get married.
"Your wife is always busy- But well it means you're free for tomorrow, right? Can we meet? It's been a while since the last time we saw each other."
"Sure! Let's just meet in my restaurant. I'll treat you lunch. Okay?"
"Okay! I'll see you there!" Jennie said and hung up the phone.
She was on her way home with her driver. Honestly, she didn't feel like wanting to go home. She knew, she would end up staying awake through the night like every other night for the past month. She had a bottle of sleeping pill inside her drawer but as long as she could try not to drink it, she wouldn't drink it. It wasn't good for her health, moreover when her age had passed 30. She sighed again.
She wanted to go to other place, but then again, if she did, how could she come home? Riding taxi at late night wouldn't be safe. Yet she still didn't want to go home.
"Mr. Jang, could you drive to XX Club?" Jennie tapped her driver's shoulder.
"XX Club? Are you sure, maam? But it means that you will go home alone ~ I'm sorry I cannot accompany you. My wife scolds me every time I go home late." The middle age man answered.
"That's okay. I will just stop a cab later. You can directly go home after driving me there. Just make sure you will pick me up at 10 am tomorrow. I want to go to Chaeng's place." Jennie smiled a little.
"Okay if that's your decision." The man nodded and drove his way to the place Jennie mentioned.
--------------------------
"Okay, now where is that XX Club her driver is talking about?" Lisa slowed down her speed and looked around to find the pub where Jennie's at.
Lisa was playing game inside her room when suddenly she got a call from Jennie's driver. Since sometime ago, Lisa was the one who drove Jennie, the latter exchanged numbers with Jennie's driver to inform the man whether he should stay waiting of could just go home because Lisa would be the one to driver his boss.
If Jennie found it hard to accept Lisa's disappearance, moreover for the younger woman. She at first wanted to bring her hatred back to life, resurrected it so she could just pretend her feelings didn't exist at all, but she failed.
She couldn't get rid of the girl's gummy-smile off of her mind no matter how she had tried hard to make herself busy. She had bought numerous games to ease her mind but not to avail, she had rented many some comedy movies to watch it at home but then again, the movies couldn't even bring a small smile to her face. It would of course make her frustrated and desperate but she never wanted to show it to anyone, including Seulgi. She would play it cool and pretended to be strong when she's at work.
She would have a joke with her friends in her division like nothing happened. It tired her out surely, but she didn't mind. She wanted to show that she was strong and had been prepared for the worst possibility about her wrong feelings for her boss. She had accepted the rejection with big heart but it didn't mean that her heart was willing to let go of Jennie. Her ex was as beautiful as or even more beautiful than Jennie but weirdly, she didn't fall for her ex as hard as she fell for Jennie. Lisa's logic had been shut down the day she realized her love for her boss.
Different from Jennie, sleep was Lisa's best friend and her pain killer for her unrequited love for her boss. When she's ensured that all of her works had been done and that the work hour has done, she would sometimes go to nearby market to stock on her groceries or sometimes when she was too lazy to cook, she would just buy takeaway food and ate it at her place while playing game.
When she was full and bored, she would drink warm milk so her eyes would easily close. Often she couldn't finish her food but at least she drank milk to ensure her stomach would be just fine the day after.
She ever had a thought to move on by finding new person to date or at least to make her forget about Jennie but she abandoned her thought, knowing she would only hurt the innocence since she's still so in love with Jennie. She decided to take time and heal her heart, assure that Jennie wasn't there anymore before going out to hunt on new girl. When would that be? Heck, Lisa even didn't know for sure. One thing she knew, it would take quite a long time for her to move on.
It was 30 minutes passed 11 pm when her phone rang. She picked up the phone to ask why he called her, knowing she was no longer in duty to drive Jennie from and to work.
It turned out that the driver needed her help to look out for Jennie. He said he tried to call Jennie's mobile but the latter didn't pick up and it made him worried. He also added that he couldn't pick her up because his wife would be angry.
Lisa was contemplating whether she would go or not. Her logic said no but her heart betrayed her logic.
After some seconds thinking, she finally agreed to look for Jennie.
The driver mentioned the address of the club and thanked her.
"Oh, it's here!" Lisa found it and parked her bike.
She removed her helmet and made her way inside the club.
"Now, where is she?" Lisa went through the people to seek for a certain person.
The club was flooded by people. It was so crowded that there was barely a space for Lisa to walk. Some of them were dancing, some of them were drinking, flirting, while the rest were doing dirty things only God knew.
"Why would she go here in the first place?! Tsk! And why did I still care? She has made it very clear that she doesn't like me that way when she even didn't make any effort to try to see me as a partner. Lisa-ah, you really are a masochist." Lisa scolded herself while still trying to find Jennie.
From a far, Lisa could see a long jet black hair. She guessed it was Jennie so she went closer and yes, it was Jennie. She was sitting on a stool, enjoying her drink with a slightly reddened face.
A guy approached her and from Lisa's sight, it looked like the guy was trying to force Jennie to dance with him.
Lisa didn't like how the man gripped Jennie's wrist tightly. She quickly made a move to stop the guy from doing further.
"Yah! What are you doing to her!? Let her go!" Lisa came in between and pushed the man, making the man released Jennie's wrist.
"And who are you to her, huh? Her babysitter?" The guy looked angry and stepped forward.
"......." Lisa looked away, knowing she didn't have a right to forbid the guy from flirting with Jennie.
She was merely Jennie's employee.
"Lisa? Is that you?! Oh~ I must be dreaming now because the real Lisa once said she wouldn't bother me anymore and that she would act like nothing happened~ We would go back to boss and her employee, wouldn't we? I'm so saadddd~" Jennie had exceeded the tipsy mode.
She's kind of drunk.
"You're drunk, maam." Lisa softly said.
"Oh so you're her maid, huh? Is that all? Then you don't have any right to prevent me from dancing with your boss! Get out of my way!" The man pushed Lisa's shoulder.
"I'm not her maid! I'm her lover! But when we're at work, she's my boss! So I have full right to disallow my girlfriend from dancing with a jerk like you!" Lisa lied.
She again stood between the man and Jennie.
"Oh yea? Prove it then-" The man challenged.
'I'm sorry, Nini~ But its for your own safety.' Lisa said in her mind before turning her head and kissed Jennie.
She closed her eyes and tenderly put her lips on Jennie.
She took a deep breath before tilting her head and deepened the kiss to make the man believe her.
She was about to let go when she felt Jennie kissing her back.
Jennie moved her lips and nibbled Lisa's upper lip.
Jennie wrapped her hands around Lisa's neck.
"Tsk! Gays these days will make me forever single!" The man remarked and turned his body and left Lisa and Jennie who were still kissing.
"L-lets go." Lisa with difficulty removed her lips from Jennie, making the older woman groan.
'She's drunk, Lisa! You shouldn't take it seriously! She wouldn't kiss you back if she's in her right mind.' Lisa reminded herself to prevent her heart from blooming and the butterflies in her stomach from flying.
"I'm tired, Lili~" Jennie resisted Lisa's pull and refused to move.
"Lili? You must be really drunk. Aish! Why should I care about you again, huh?" Lisa murmured before lifting Jennie and walked slowly toward the exit door.
"Because you love me!! You once told me that you love me and you will always do, right? It means you are here because you still love me and can't forget about me~ I'm smart, aren't I?" Jennie giggled and buried her face in Lisa's crook.
"Whatever- I'm just glad I found you before that pervert have chance to do something bad to you." Lisa shook her head and breathed sharply.
She had lost her breath, thanks to her effort to lift Jennie in her arms.
"And what would you do if he did something bad to me, Lili????" Jennie giggled again.
"Why are you so cute when you're drunk, huh? It's like you're not 32 and definitely not like the scary boss everyone knows at work." Lisa made Jennie sat on her motorbike.
She took the spare helmet and helped Jennie to wear it.
"Lisa-aah~ People say that a person will be at her/his most honest state when she/he's drunk, you know~ I actually don't know what I'm saying now but I know it's an honest thing. So why don't you try to ask some things to me? I will answer it with honesty~" Jennie slurred.
"Hmm. Okay- Nini, do you dislike me that bad until you ignored each and every effort I have made to own your heart a month ago?" Lisa followed Jennie's game.
She actually only wanted to play along, to ensure that Jennie wouldn't sleep when she's driving because it would be dangerous.
"Hahahaa.. You're such an idiot, you know that! I'm not that heartless not am I that dense! I even still save your messages in my phone. Furthermore, I made a special folder to keep it. I wanted to say that I don't like you! That I hate you! But I can't." Jennie's words made Lisa alleviated her speed.
She kept silent to make Jennie continue.
"I thought it's because I pitied you. You're so nice to me for the past month while I'm nothing but a jerk to treat you that way, but this month, when you're not around. I feel lonelier much more than before. I feel the company is so quiet when I work until late. I feel unsafe with my driver. I feel weird. Do you know what caused it, Lis?" Jennie hugged Lisa from behind.
"I..I don't know." Lisa stuttered.
She couldn't lie that she was curious and happy at the same time. She couldn't handle her heartbeat which beat louder and faster each second passed.
"I don't know, you don't know, then I think only God know," Jennie laughed.
"I never expect you can be stupid too when you're dunk." Lisa chuckled.
"All I know is that I missed you. I missed you around me. I missed your cooking. I missed your scent. I missed how you driving me carefully. I missed your kisses on my cheeks or forehead. I missed our dates. I missed you accompany me at work. I missed your silly jokes. I missed you, Lisa-ah~" Jennie hugged Lisa more tightly.
"I missed you too, but sadly I have made a promise and I'm a woman of my words. I will leave you alone except when we're at work. We are nothing but boss and her employee. Besides, you don't and can't like me how I like you, Jen. You cannot love me like how I love you. That's our huge difference." Lisa sadly smiled at her own words.
"It's too late now, Nini. I asked for a month and you said no. You ignored my effort. You never even once appreciated what I've done to you. You prefer doing work than talking to me when we're in our dates. However, I'm still in love with you. I just hope a man who will end up with you will make you happy." A tear fell from Lisa's eyes.
"I'm sorry." Jennie murmured.
"You really are drunk, aren't you? The real Jennie would never say this to me. Now, let's go so you can have a proper rest soon." Lisa turned off her engine and got off of her bike.
She then helped Jennie to get down and removed the helmet.
"Come I will make sure you arrive safely on your bed." Lisa again lifted Jennie, this time on her back.
"Why are you so kind to me, Lisa-ah? I've been nothing but bad to you." Jennie asked sleepily.
"Because I love you." Lisa answered confidently.
"Will you ever stop loving me then?" With the remaining energy, Jennie asked again.
"I hope I will, so I can move on and seek for my own happiness." That was the last thing Jennie could hear before she shut her eyes and immersed in deep slumber.
Hearing no words coming after, Lisa knew Jennie had fallen asleep.
She asked help from the security to open Jennie's apartment door with the spare key the apartment had. She thanked the latter and brought Jennie to her bedroom.
She placed Jennie slowly, afraid to disturb the sleeping beauty. She removed her heels and loosened her belt. Lisa turned the air conditioner on and covered Jennie's body with the blanket up to her chest.
"Goodnight, Jennie. I love you." Lisa whispered before leaving the room.
----------------------------------
"UGH!!" Jennie woke up due to the unbearable headache she was feeling.
A groan escaped her lips. She had difficulty to open her eyes but her ringing phone forced her to. Without seeing who's calling her, she picked up the phone.
"Yes?" Jennie's voice cracked. She felt unbearably thirsty.
"It's me, maam. I just want to tell you that I'm already in the lobby should you want to leave now." It was her driver who's speaking.
"Wait!" Jennie forced herself to sit up.
She reached the filled glass on the nightstand. She wondered, when did she ever place a glass there but she ignored her question and gulped it in one go.
"What time is it?" Jennie massaged her head and leaned her back to the bed post.
"It's 10.30 am, maam." The driver informed.
"What? Oh darn, I'm late! Wait there, I'll be down in 30 minutes-" She didn't wait for the driver to reply and just hang up the phone.
"Ugh, my head is hurt. How come I ended back to my place? Aish- I can't remember anything from last night. Must be because I drank too much. Maybe I hailed a cab and the security helped me to walk to my room. I should thank him later." Jennie put on her sandal and walked to the bathroom to take a quick bath.
She didn't forget to inform Chaeyoung through message that she would be late.
Jennie got ready. She put on simple clothes, only dark blue jeans with white tank top covered with black fur jacket. She didn't feel like putting something extravagant today. She wanted to be simple and casual.
She took her purse and made her way out of her apartment.
She tapped her foot as she waited for the elevator to pick her up. She pressed Ground Floor button and waited. Fortunately, she had dunk the medicine on the nightstand. Again, she never remembered she placed it there. Perhaps it's just her security again. She really needed to buy something for him later to show her regard.
"Good afternoon, maam. How are you feeling today?" The security stood up and bowed to Jennie.
"Good afternoon, Mr. Khang. I want to thank you for helping me last night." Jennie smiled sincerely.
"Oh, it's not me you should be thankful with. It was the tall woman who lifted you on her back and brought you safely to your room." Mr. Khang returned the smile.
"What do you mean?" Jennie frowned.
"I'm sorry I didn't ask her name. But I think it's your friend or employee because she knew your room number and where your bedroom is." The man added.
'Tall woman? Could it be Lisa?' Jennie wondered.
She shook her head rapidly, thinking that it was impossible.
Then flashed of Lisa's face appeared in her mind. She vaguely remembered the night at the dub. A man suddenly approached her and tried to flirt with her when a woman stood her and defended her. The man insisted so the tall woman needed to prove why the man most not flirt with Jennie. She kissed Jennie right on her lips and Jennie reciprocated the kiss.
"Ms Kim, are you okay?" The man softly touched Jennie's shoulder when he saw Jennie looked lost. The touched returned Jennie from her day dreaming.
"Uh? Ah, yes. I'm okay. I have to go now. However, thank you again." Jennie bowed lightly and went to her driver.
--------------------------------------------------
"Are you okay, maam?" The driver asked and took a quick glance from the rearview.
"Yes, I am. Thank you for asking." Jennie breathed deeply, still thinking whether what she saw in her mind was true or not.
"Did Ms. Lisa pick you up last night?" The question made Jennie jerked up.
"What do you mean by that? How did you know that Lisa picked me up?" Jennie sighed.
It was then she realized that what she saw in her mind was true. Lisa had indeed picked her up.
'It explains the glass, medicine, and the blanket which covered me warmly.' Jennie told her mind.
"I'm sorry for being audacious. I called her last night and asked for her help to pick you up. I gave her the address of the club because I'm worried. You looked so stressed last night and I'm afraid you were too drunk to protect yourself. You are a woman and there are many dangerous men inside the club. Thankfully, she said yes." The driver explained.
"Oh." Jennie shortly replied.
Her mind was too busy playing scenes after scenes about last night.
"Are you angry at me, maam?" The driver took a long and deep breath, preparing the worst scold he would ever have.
He had been Jennie's driver for sometime so yes, he knew Jennie's attitude inside out.
"No. It's just... sighed. I'm tired. I will sleep now. Wake me up when we're there." Jennie's answer made the driver startled. He didn't get the scold and it made him wonder what happened with the usual Jennie.
"Okay. Have a nice sleep." The driver nodded.
Jennie lowered her body and rested her head on the back rest.
She sighed again.
Her headache had been subsided so she could think more clearly. She tried to recall what really happened last night with Lisa. She knew when she drunk, she tended to talk anything she had in mind without filtering it beforehand.
She was afraid she said things she must not have.
What she could picture distinctly was when she kissed Lisa back. It felt too real to be a dream. She also remembered how Lisa piggyback her breathlessly while replying and answering her rambles.
However, she forgot about what things she was talking about with Lisa. She could only hope Lisa wouldn't talk about it tomorrow.
'Should I text her to say thank you? But, wouldn't it be too awkward? Ah.. I just need to summon her to my office so I can thank her face to face.' Jennie concluded and closed her eyes.