"I love you," Kylo whispered in your ear. "I love you, and I want to marry you." Everything he was saying to you was so sweet and lovely, but you couldn't let him lose sight of what was most important.
"If, if I marry you, will you please let us leave the house?" You asked him, leaning away and placing your forehead on his. You were determined to not let this distract you from the issue at hand. He didn't reply right away, and you took it upon yourself to remind him of what this conversation was really about. "Marrying me won't keep me any safer being trapped in this house. Lucille and I--"
"I'll hold a worldwide ceremony in front of the entire ship. I'll have it broadcasted to every corner of the galaxy." Kylo said, and a smile broke over your face. Kylo had never lied to you about something he was going to do, and when he promised you he'd make your marriage public you had no reason to doubt him. "It's going to be hard for me, but I promise you I'll do it if you'll spend the rest of your life with me."
"I don't want this to be hard on you, Kylo," You interjected, taking his face in your hands. "I don't want to force you into doing this. I want you to do this because you want us to thrive. And because it's the right thing." He let out a sigh, blowing a hot puff of air onto your face. The idea stressed even you out, but you knew it was a need at this point. He nodded his head against you, brought his hands down to your hips and held you tightly.
"Anything. I can't promise that it will be soon, but it will happen. I promise you that." You smiled at him, nuzzled into his neck and basked in your adoration of him.
"I trust you," You admitted. "I love you, and I trust you." The two of you sat there in a loving embrace. You never wanted to let go of the man you had loved so much, the man that was finally putting his fears aside in order to care for his family.
Both you and Kylo took a moment to compose yourselves, to get yourselves together and appear confidently before your guests downstairs. You exited the bedroom and went down the steps hand in hand, taking in the sight of Beth sitting at the bottom of your steps. Before her eyes turned to you she was looking on at the sight of Lendix pushing the tricycle around the foyer; Venus posted in the front peddling and steering while Lucille hitched a ride in the bucket. While Venus was smiling and having the time of her life, Lucille gripped the sides of the wagon looking nervously up at Lendix who was right next to her. Lendix wasn't going nearly as quickly as Kylo often did with her, but you had to imagine she was having at least the smallest bit of fun.
All eyes set on you and Lucille immediately perked up, her eyes widening and a hearty smile settling on her once unsure face. "Mama, deedee!" She exclaimed, standing to her feet inside of the bucket. Your motherly instincts immediately kicked in and you found yourself rushing from the bottom step, past Beth, and up to the kids only to watch as Lendix lifted her from the wagon and set her soundly on the floor. Lucy looked up at him confused for a second while Venus stared inquisitively down at her newfound little friend.
"Get in, 'Cille." She asked, reaching back and patting the wagon Lucy was once in, but Lucy had her sights set on you. You happily accepted her into your arms, lifting her up so that Kylo could interact with her too.
"You sure have a sweetheart on your hands." Beth said above Lucille's babble to you. You thanked her, and when Lucille noticed Beth was giving her attention she turned fearfully to Kylo and held her hands out to him. You smiled at her, then had to step out of Kylo's way as he pushed past you and Beth on the stairs and walked right up to Lendix.
"I want to marry her," He stated, his voice full of confidence. "I want to marry her and I want our ceremony to be in front of the entire ship." You smiled proudly at the back of his head. It sounded like this was happening for sure and you were all for it. Lendix smiled back at him as Venus ran straight up to Kylo's feet, reaching her little arms in the air desperately trying to get her friend Lucille to play with her again.
"That sounds like an excellent choice, my Lord," Lendix beams, pulling his daughter away from Kylo just as she started to cry. "Did you happen to set a date?" He asks, and by the nervous glance Kylo flashed at you over his shoulder, you could tell he hadn't given any thought as to when the two of you would present yourselves to the entire galaxy as husband and wife.
"Probably not any time soon, but it's still high on my priority list." He said, adjusting Lucy in his arms and turning back to Lendix. It was disappointing to hear that it wouldn't be happening soon, but you knew Kylo was still deathly afraid of revealing the existence of your family. It wasn't like he could marry you tomorrow. He wouldn't be healed that quickly
"Of course, my Lord," Lendix said, nodding his head. Kylo set Lucille down as Lendix began to go into details about how he was married to Beth on the Finalizer, and as they talked the two girls stared at each other. You thought it really was alarming at how scared Lucy was of Venus when all Venus wanted to do was play with her. Again, it was all due to the fact that Lucille only had two people to socialize with during her year and a half of life. You wondered how you could combat this in the future, because you felt so awful for her. Remembering what your midwife told you the day Lucy was born, you wondered what the odds were that Kylo would allow more children to come onto the Supremacy, or him being willing to pack his family up and move into a territory where children were welcome. Either way, Lucy would need more interaction with other children.
You sat down next to Beth and welcomed Lucille into your lap, and of course Venus wasn't too far behind you. "'Cille, have this." She said, holding out one of Lucille's toy bottles for her baby doll. Lucille stared at it, took it reluctantly and then turned her head into your chest. Venus stared on brokenheartedly at the back of Lucy's head, and you heard Beth giggle there next to you.
"You know, Venus doesn't get to play with other kids her age too often," She said, lifting Venus into her lap. "It sounds like you and Ren have made a lot of progress. We'd love to have you guys over to our home one day." Her invite to you was warm and full of love, so much so that you found yourself glowing at the thought. You became overly excited at the thought of going over to a new home, your new friend's home none the less so you could watch your daughters play, laugh, and learn together. "We only had her here today because we had business to attend to on this ship and my son was too busy with his friends to stay with his sister."
"That sounds like a lot of fun, for all of us." You said, beaming up at Kylo as he discussed his matters with Lendix. He had shoved his hands in his pockets and was looking stressfully at the ground. He was overwhelmed and you found just a little bit of his uneasiness transferred over to you. You knew this was going to be incredibly hard on him, but you knew he could do it. He loved you. He'd do anything for you and you'd be there every step of the way for him.
Four Months Later
You urged Kylo to speak with a Therapist in the days after his proposal to you. He explained that therapy had been frowned upon by Snoke, that he was forced to work through his problems on his own or risk being humiliated by his master. You had to remind him that Snoke wasn't here. He wasn't here to hurt Kylo, humiliate him, or force him to kill the people he loved anymore. Kylo had to make his own decisions, and you wanted him to start with one that would allow him to transition into this new part of his life as easily as possible.
He did cave eventually, inviting a therapist into his home to speak with him once a week, and every other week you would be included in his session as well. There you uncovered your plans and resolutions as an engaged couple, how you wanted to live your lives together in the future, and what your personal hopes were for yourself, him, and your daughter. You thought it really did him well in the long run. He eventually opened up to having Lendix and his family over for dinner a few nights a month, as well as medical personnel that came to give both you and Lucille check ups. He even allowed a wedding planner to come over and help plan out your larger than life wedding. In a few weeks you were allowed to stand in the foyer as he came and left, and when the count down for your wedding finally ended, you had a plethora of people come to your home to pamper you before your big day.
By now, Lucille had gotten used to at least seeing the Lendix family on a regular basis, and Beth and Venus had come over to keep her company while you prepared for your big day. Kylo wasn't home, and instead was preparing for the wedding on another part of the Supremacy. The two of you had been abiding by the rule of not seeing each other until you walked down the aisle, and it was the most exciting feeling ever. Kylo had someone do your hair, nails, and makeup. Days earlier you were fitted for a dress that you had picked out, and when the entire thing came together you felt like absolute royalty. Even Lucille, who was only about to turn two in a few months, was dressed like an actual princess and ready to walk down the aisle with you.
The two of you wore nearly identical white, fancy dresses with embroidered red roses in parts of the skirt portion, and while you had a veil covering your eyes Lucille had a crown made of white roses that sat in her long, curly black hair. Lucy would hold a basket that contained various types of flowers that she was to throw on the ground there next to you, but even though you and Beth had coached her so many times you didn't expect her to actually do anything. Kylo said he wanted everyone onboard the Supremacy to witness his wedding to you, and you were sure she, just like you, would be intimidated by the number of people there would be before her.
When you finally got to see Lucille after getting yourself ready you were nearly moved to tears. She was so beautiful and so jovial as she ran up to you with Venus by her side. "Mama, peetee." She said with a huge smile, running her hands down your dress. "Mama, boo-ti-ful!" You had to fight the urge to cry at her honest, encouraging words. She thought her mama was pretty and beautiful on her wedding day.
Leaving the house was yet another hurdle you found to be overwhelming as well. For the last three years you had been stuck in this house. For three years you saw the same people come in and out, and you could hardly remember what the Supremacy even looked like. When the doors finally opened and you were invited to step out and have your first taste of freedom, you almost wanted to call the entire thing off.
"Work," Lucy exclaimed, holding your hand tight. When Lucy began to talk you and Kylo had taught her that the outside was work, and only daddy could go to work. "Deedee go work." She pointed to the open doors and said again, and you could feel your hand sweating around hers.
"We're going to work today, Luce," You said, and she looked up at you inquisitively. You took a step toward the door with everyone else following you, and your reluctance grew as Lucy pulled away from you.
"No go work, mama." She whined, and you thought for sure she was thinking you were leaving her here. After all, she had never gotten to leave her home. Why would she think you were taking her?
"No, no, Lucy," You said, looking down at her and drinking in her worried expression. "You're going with mama. We're going to meet daddy." Your stomach was tumbling inside of you and you bit back the urge to vomit out of nervousness. You should have seen this coming and prepared better for it. Both you and Lucy were afraid of the outside, afraid of something that seemed so intimidating.
"Don't be scared," Beth said, coming up behind you and resting a hand on your shoulder. "I'll be with you every step of the way." She reassured you, and you smiled back at her. Kylo had told you that he increased the security of his hallway, and that he'd have armed guards escort you to the wedding. For some reason, you weren't afraid of anyone hurting you until it actually came time for you to leave. You shut your eyes, took a deep breath and held on tight to Lucy's hand as you took your first steps outside of your home, into the light and into what was basically brand new territory for you. You felt safe. You felt loved. You felt Kylo reaching out to you with the Force.
I'm right here with you. Please don't be scared.
Don't be scared. Today was your wedding day. You couldn't be scared.
Beth and Venus departed as you and Lucy made it to the space that had been cleared for your wedding. Kylo told you it was a meeting hall that held upwards of thousands of people, a stage, and he even had a wall removed so it could hold thousands more. He told you people were thrilled to hear he was getting married, and everyone wanted to attend but only so many people could. He said there would be cameras that would broadcast your wedding to all corners of the galaxy, and everyone would know that you were becoming the official Lady Ren. As you stood outside of the doors your heart beat rapidly in your chest. Your face and your daughter's face would be seen by anyone and everyone who wanted to watch the Supreme Leader's wedding, and you'd be lying if you said you weren't nervous, yet overly excited about the entire thing. Kylo Ren really was showing you off to the world, and everyone would know that you were now his wife.
Lucy was still on edge, whimpering and whining as you stood outside of the doors. Your poor daughter was nervous, mumbling for her "deedee" because she knew he could keep her safe. You could hear the organ playing from the other side of the door and knew it would be time to walk down the aisle soon, but you couldn't walk in there in front of thousands of people and cameras with her being so nervous.
"Hey, beautiful," You said, squatting down and balancing yourself on your high heels as well as you could. "There's no reason to be scared. Your mommy is here, and deedee is just on the other side of the door." You reassured her, running your hands down her face. She nodded her head, pointing at the door and moaning for her daddy once more. "Listen, Luce. Just hold onto mommy's hand. Okay? Hold onto mommy's hand, and look for daddy." You said just as the doors opened, revealing an entire auditorium full of people. The two of you turned your heads at the same time, watching as everyone dressed in black and white stood to greet you. Officers and Generals removed their hats and Storm Troopers removed their helmets. The tune to Here Comes the Bride began to play loud and clear, and you knew it was your cue to begin your walk. You took a deep breath, gripped Lucille's hand tight in yours and did your best to smile. Once you got to the end of the aisle you would be with your one true love, and that's all you really wanted.
You found the act of simply walking through the mass of people to be a lot less stressful than you thought. Even though you were calm and as relaxed as you could be, you could tell Lucille was overwhelmed. She wasn't crying, but she was absolutely silent, and when you looked down she was staring at the people who stared back at her full of curiosity and adoration.
"So, he does have a daughter." You heard one person say to your left.
"She looks exactly like him, my god."
"How did he hide them for so long?"
"She's beautiful."
"She's adorable!"
"They make the most perfect family."
Your heart soared as the compliments continued in quiet whispers, surrounding you and Lucy with the love that you deserved but were deprived of all these years. For years you were just a rumor, just a figment of people's imagination. You were someone they knew nothing about, and thus they cast their own prescription of you to other people To some, you were just a lover. To some, you were a devoted mother caring for a child that was brought on by rape in secrecy. To some, you and Lucy didn't exist at all. But now, you were you. You'd have the opportunity to show the entire galaxy who you and Lucille were. Another burst of energy shot through your chest as you looked on at everyone smiling at you, at the photographers that were snapping photos of you left and right. It didn't even occur to you to look up at Kylo, but when you did your heart came to a standstill.
He stood at the altar, Lendix and his son right behind him and Beth on the other side where you were supposed to stand. His hands were clasped in front of him and tears poured freely down his face. His eyes swept down your body to your daughter, and for a moment you watched him mouth Lucille's name before he locked his eyes with you. His mouth fell open and you watched him take a deep breath. Anyone who would have seen him would have been able to see him profusely bleeding love for his family. There was no doubt about it.
You were nearing closer and closer to the altar, and when Lucille picked her head up to look straight ahead and saw Kylo, her hand slipped from yours and you couldn't catch her fast enough. She took off running, stepping up the stairs and dropping the basket of flowers at her feet. You watched as they tumbled down the stairs, trying to laugh off the embarrassment but then melted as Kylo received her, picking her up and hugging her close to him. She wrapped her small arms around his neck and looked out into the crowd, closing her eyes as everyone erupted in laughter and "awwing" at the scene.
You hurried your way to the altar, the bouquet of flowers held in both hands now and took your spot there in front of Kylo and Beth. You stared at the emotional scene in front of you and tried to keep it together in fear of having your makeup run, but you couldn't help the few tears that dripped down your face. Once again, Kylo made good on his promise to you. He was showing you off proudly to the entire galaxy. You couldn't ask for anything more.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Lord and Lady Kylo Ren, and their two and a half year old daughter, Lucille Eden Ren." Spoke the priest, and at the mention of your title you were met with even more applause. "These two people come before you today in order to make the finest, most important commitment to one another. To have and to hold, to care for and to love one another for the rest of their lives." You were giddy as the priest spoke on about whatever it was he was supposed to say. Everyone in the auditorium was quiet, save for the clicking noises of the many cameras that were capturing the passing moments. You thought for sure this was going to be more intimidating than it actually was, and instead you found yourself basking in the glow. Before you knew it the priest was saying the iconic words: "You may now kiss your bride."
You stared up at Kylo with a huge smile on your face, looking him deep into his eyes as Lucille streatched her arms and held onto his face. She still looked out into the crowds, but Kylo wouldn't let that stop him from the most important part of this wedding. He shifted Lucille in his arms so that she was facing you, wrapped his free arm around your shoulders and pulled you into him. His lips came crashing against yours and, in a split second, you became the Ren you were meant to be when you first showed up to Kylo's door so many years ago.
A/N
On this episode of Jennifer is an English Major trying to become an editor, we find out that Jennifer spelled the word neck as "kneck" not once, but twice in the second chapter of this story and didn't notice until a month later. I swear I love editing I just hate editing my own work lol.
This is technically the final chapter, but I have a nice little epilogue to post tomorrow. Believe me when I say this story is nothing like what I originally planned it to be. The two might as well be completely different stories now lol. Next chapter is just an excuse for me to write out one more time in their lives that I couldn't because they married so much quicker than I anticipated. Stay tuned!