AN: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
Trigger
Don't hate me >.<
*Ashton's POV*
I stood up from my bed and locked my bedroom door. I then walked to my bathroom and locked that door too. I opened up the cabinet and pulled out my sharpest blade. I then got out my bottle of sleeping pills. I didn't even bother to write a letter. No one will miss me anyways.
Not even Luke.
I grabbed the blade and put it to my wrist dragging it across. I at first did it slowly, then I spiraled out of control. Blood was coming out of my wrist at a fast pace. I stopped with that and then took the pills. I at first did one at a time. One turned into two. Two turned into three. Three led to the rest of the bottle in my palm and into my mouth.
I started getting light headed and did the only thing I could.
Close my eyes waiting for death to take me.
~
I was in a dark place. I heard voices around me. They were quiet and I couldn't understand what they were saying. I opened my eyes and say white. My eyes got focused and I realized I was in the hospital. Why was I in the hospital. I'm supposed to be dead. I turned my head and say the other boys. They all looked so tired.
They all had dark circles under their eyes and red eyes from crying.
"Why am I alive?" I whispered, barely even audible.
The boys must have heard me because the next thing I knew, all three came to hug me.
I flinched.
"Ashton?" Luke said hurt filling his eyes.
"Why am I alive?" I repeated.
"We don't want you to die," Michael stated.
"Yes I do."
"Ashton. Do you even know what you're saying?" Calum asked, confused as to why I would want to die.
"Nobody loves me."
"Yes we do. The fans. Your family. Me," Luke said.
"Luke, you and I both know that is bullshit," I said, trying to convince them.
"You know I love you Ash. Why would I fake having a girlfriend?"
"Your journal says different."
Everybody froze right then and there. You would have to have a chainsaw to break the unsettling silence.
"What are you talking about Ashton. I don't have a journal," Luke tried convincing me by acting dumb.
"You sure as hell know what I'm talking about."
"Luke, why else do you think he would do this?" Michael spoke up. I froze. Were Michael and Calum in on this too?
"Did you know about this?" I asked the both of them.
They both looked down guiltily. How? How could my own two best friends do this to me? I felt tears coming to my eyes. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I let the tears flow freely down my face.
"Why?" I asked after a moment of silence.
Why?" I repeated, my tone harsher.
"We wanted you to stop harming yourelf," Luke confessed.
I scoffed,"And you think lying about liking me would stop me?"
All three of them nodded.
"You can't tell someone to stop cutting. You have to give them a reason."
~
AN:
Sorry if it's not as long as you hoped it would be.
Everyone wanted me to update so I figured why not.
Question: How did you guys find this?
And if you want to take a break from this sadness read my other fanfic Hidden because that story is a lot more fluffy :-)
GOAL: 5+ votes and comments
Love Y'all
Stay Fab!!!!