So I lost my first draft and that sucks so I guess I can make this chapter better than my deceased draft.
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I ignore the voices of my class calling me back and instead let my feet take me somewhere far far away. Just my luck, as I run out of school, I pass by the canteen packed with seniors having their lunch. Their glances may be brief but they sting me with a foreign sense of insecurity. I've never allowed myself to feel like this until now.
I desperately block them out but their phones blast noises that bring me back.
"This just in, Ladybug and Chat Noir have successfully apprehended a super villain terrorizing Paris. We were unable to get an interview as the duo already left before we arrived at the scene."
It's yet another reminder of who I'm up against and what choices I have to take for others and for myself.
I end up exiting through the back of the school with a bench at the side. Running my fingers through my hair, I settle on a bench. I pull my feet up, not caring about my shoes soiling the seat.
Tears begin welling up and trickling down my face as a whirlwind of thoughts fill my head.
Why did I do that? I shouldn't have slapped her in front of everyone!
How could I not? She was defaming my family who sacrificed their lives for me!
Now everyone will know who I really am- that I'm not a happy girl I seem to be.
Better honest than be a lying jerk!
It feels like two sets of myself are fighting each other like tigers for prey. I can barely wrap my head around what I just did. Half of me feels utter regret while the other half feels angry but relieved.
"Selene? Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you," I tense up when I hear Lila's ear-grating voice.
"Don't act kind," I say hoarsely- not quite ready to jump into another argument. I keep my eyes on the ground as she approaches me.
When she's about to place her delicate hands on my shoulder, from out of the blue, Grimm dives down in front of her face like a hawk. "Don't you dare touch her!"
Lila yelps as I look up with a start. "Grimm what are yo-"
"I have lived for billions of years but in all my life, I have never seen such a vile and insolent creature walk this Earth. If you were born a couple centuries ago, your disrespect could cause you your life."
Lila's shock morphs into a sneer. "Fascinating, is this the bat kwami?"
"Yes, and this is my claw," Grimm says as he almost brushes Lila's cheek.
"Lila, step away from Selene," Marinette says, darting towards us. With only a second to react, I clap my hands, encasing Grimm in both of my palms, and place it on my lap. Marinette slips in between Lila and me. "Come any closer and you'll hear it from me."
"You think I'll listen to you!" Lila says snidely.
"Lila Rossi, right?" Luka joins Marinette, blocking Lila's view of me. "I've heard a lot of rumours about you- none very pretty."
"And who are you?" Lila says scowling.
"I'm no one really," Luka says nonchalantly but I could detect the mild sadness. "But you're making a scene here. You should leave."
"You should go, Lila." Adrien appears like a third knight in shining armour with a severe look.
"Fine, but I don't think I did anything wrong," Lila says turning away with a look of haughty disdain.
From the door, I spot Juleka and Rose pointing at Lila and saying something to Miss Bustier. Out teacher says, "Lila, could I speak with you for a moment? There's some inaccuracy to your presentation."
I turn away, uninterested to see anymore. I try wiping the never-ending tears with my arm without exposing Grimm hidden in my hands.
"Hey," Adrien says gently. "Forget about what happened today."
My shoulder relax when he doesn't press for information from me. I never told him everything about my parents besides the fact that my mom and Emilie where close friends. I mumble between sniffles, hands fidgeting, "I think I want to go home."
Marinette, sensing my request for space, pulls Adrien away. Adrien acquiesces and say," I'll tell Miss Bustier for you."
I smile gratefully. Sure everyone might be able to connect by association to my Blood Bat persona and maybe even to Hawkmoth, but now that I think about it, I feel relieved. I'm sorry Adrien, I've always acted tough in front of you. But now, seeing you defend me, I've realised I was the one who needed you- as a protector- as a brother. My hands start to tremble as I feel Grimm shift under my hands.
Luka tentatively sits down beside me so, I look away. I feel a large gentle hand settle on top of mine and realise that it's Luka's. When I meet his sky blue gaze, he looks at me with resolve.
There are still my classmates near the door, talking in lowered tones. Without words, Grimm slides onto Luka's palm.
"What?" I croak as Luka continues to stare at me. "Do you like watching me cry?"
"No, I don't." Catching me by surprise, Luka wraps his arms around me, but I feel Grimms small weight as he slips onto my blouse pocket. His embrace is warm and gentle. It feels pleasant. "Let's get you home."
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We slipped past Miss Bustier with the help of Rose and Juleka- but not without getting cocky grins and smirks.
"You're going to get into trouble," I say monotonously as we both walk to the Agreste mansion.
"I deserve it, don't you think?" Luka says half-heartedly but smiling.
I stop in my tracks and Luka follows suit- probably sensing the coming storm. I say weakly," Why didn't you tell me?"
His expression falls as he understand my question. "I met Master Shou when I was little during my mom's world tour back when she was a famous musician. One of the destinations was Singapore, so she brought me and Juleka along. She said something about making friends our age and we met Master Shou instead. I didn't understand the significance until this year- a week before we met."
Suddenly, I recall back my vision when my mother said she would introduce me to playmates. Did she know Mrs Couffaine then?
"Master Shou arrived at our doorstep. He ended up being good friends with my mom since apparently he enjoyed listening to her music."
I chuckle. "I didn't peg Master Shou as the type to listen to rock."
"Yeah. Then he asked for me then explained how he was missing a miraculous. After I took an oath to keep my lips sealed, he gave me a handbook that had information of his miraculous box especially on the bat kwami."
I shake head. "You're not answering my question. Why didn't you tell me."
He goes silent for a moment and then answers," I didn't tell you I knew Master Shou because you wouldn't trust me."
"No," I say, knowing that he's only beating around the bush. "I mean why didn't you tell me I was going to have to give up Grimm and instead helped me improve my relationship with him. You only ever gave me advice or a listening ear. You gave a false sense of security!" Just like that, I'm sobbing all over again.
"He's your family." Luka grimaces and keeps his eyes on the ground. "I couldn't tell you. I know what it's like to lose someone you love."
I'm left speechless- I couldn't bring myself to reply.
"I was going to fix it. I'd lie and tell Master Shou it was a mistake and that the miraculous wasn't with you."
"That wouldn't work," I say lamely, wiping away tears. Yet, I understand his intentions. It's strikingly similar to the way I want to bring back Emilie since Adrien shouldn't bear to lose someone he loves.
"I'm sorry," he says and reaches out. The next thing I know, he's stroking my hair. It feels gentle and soothing. It makes me cry even harder.
"I know," I say. "I-I can't seem to stop."
"Cry it all out as much as you need. I'll be here to wipe all your tears away." As promised, Luka wipes each one of them, strumming fingers rough against my cheeks.
All you've ever done was to protect me.
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I've finally planned out the whole story all the way to the ending. Now everything is going to be as smooth as possible. As promised, the next update is on Wednesday.