Chapter 4
London....
While all of Milton was in turmoil, life in the Harley Street home was one of calm tranquility untouched by the troubles of everyday life. It was here that Margaret now lived with her Aunt Shaw, cousin Edith, and her husband Captain Lennox. Her life was turning in directions she never expected and she now found herself an heiress of her godfather's estate yet there was within her a strange unsatisfied void in her heart and manner of life. Henry Lennox frequented the Harley street home and it seemed only fitting that he become Margret's legal adviser, helping her not only understand her situation but also helping with Fredrick although deep down she knew they would probably never succeed in clearing his name.
One morning in early spring, while the rest of the house still lay asleep, Margaret stood looking out her bedroom window, clouds were gathering in the east as the sun rose over the London skyline setting it ablaze in various shades of fiery crimson red; a sure harbinger of rain.
It was at this time of day that she especially enjoyed the quite solitude, letting her thoughts slip to her carefree days in Helstone. She enjoyed nothing more than walking through the Helstone country side with her father visiting all their dear friends. Her mind drifted further back to the days when she would ramble about with no thought to time or place where more often than not, on gloriously delightful sunny days she could be found lounging under a large shade tree dreaming of enchanted places full of adventure. On the wings of those delightful memories her mind drifted to an almost forgotten idyllic daydream of happily living amongst the wood nymphs and elves, helping defend their woodland home along side their handsome prince.
Margaret smiled at the memory of that long ago childish fantasy yet wondering what made her recall that dream? She soon found her thoughts shifting as her happy innocent days of Helstone slipped as sand through her fingers to her days in Milton.
Often she thought about Nicholas, Mary, and the Boucher children. She wondered how they were faring and realized that she missed her Milton life more than she ever imagined. She knew they thought of her but at times she wondered if any one else, if he...A knock sounded at her door breaking into her thoughts. Edith's voice could be heard through the door "Margaret. Are you ready to go down for breakfast? I have some exciting news I think you will love" " Yes Edith I am coming" Margaret was surprised at how fast time had passed by as she looked out the window to now see the sun shrouded in gathering clouds turning the sky a foreboding shade of gray, "Almost like a Milton sky" Margaret thought. Now pushing all thoughts of the past away, she opened the door and greeted her fair cousin who was dressed in a gown of pale blue that set her blue eyes and fair complexion off perfectly. Margaret couldn't help admiring her cousin's beauty and commented on it as they made their way down to the dinning room.
Upon entering the room they were greeted by Edith's mother, already seated at the dinning room table with tea cup in hand. "Margaret, Edith good morning. Please sit and pour yourself a cup of tea. Why Edith where is your Captain Lennox this morning?"
" Oh, mama he is still sleeping, he came in late. But I couldn't wait and had to get up and tell Margaret the wonderful news" Edith's eyes were all aglitter with childish excitement whilst Margaret could stand being in suspense no longer. "Well Edith,what is this exciting news of yours? Do you plan to keep me in suspense forever?"
Edith grinned, hardly able to stifle the laughter that wanted to bubble forth. "Margaret my dear, you are so impatient, you always have been you know."
Margaret gave Edith a impish smiled, acknowledging the fact as she took a sip of tea.
Edith's laughter broke forth and resembled soft tinkling bells on a crisp spring day as she replied "All right Margaret I won't keep you in suspense any longer. We have been invited to attend a concert this Saturday with the Pippers. Isn't that wonderful news?" Margaret was saved from replying as Henry Lennox entered the room halting any further conversation on the subject.
Settling himself down he poured himself a cup of tea and in so doing greeted the ladies present. Then without pretense he looked straight at Margaret saying "I have some bad news Margaret. One of Mr. Bell's investments failed."
She looked up at Henry "Oh?" Henry went on to explain "Don't worry, your financial situation is secure but Mr. Bell invested in a 100 to 1 scheme with a chap named Watson"
Surprise was evident in her voice as she asked"Watson? Fanny Thornton's husband?"
Henry looked inquiringly at Margaret "The very one, lost everything he did and the situation in Milton..."
Margret's thoughts trailed off, she no longer heard what Henry had to say. [Mr. Thornton !] The very thought of him brought color to her fair cheeks, causing her heart beat to quicken. [Oh, what of him? Surely he would not engage in such a venture. No! I am sure he wouldn't!] Her thoughts were called back to the present by Henry's next words.
"...Now your Mr. Thornton was far to principled. He wouldn't risk joining in the scheme. It looks like you will have him for a tenant a little while longer." A pleased look crossed Henry's face as he continued "If he can manage it. At the present things don't look so good for Mr. Thornton. You may still have to find a new tenant Margaret."
She looked hard at Henry, then down at the toast on her plate, saying to herself "No! You are wrong! You don't know Mr. Thornton at all,he will succeed." She pondered this while spreading butter on her toast with more effort than was required when a thought dawned on her, shone brightly upon her as it took shape and form. A small smile played upon her face as she looked up, "Henry, you did say my financial situation is secure?"
Surprised by her question and change of expression he replied"Why yes Margaret; you need not worry. Mr. Bell was a shrewd investor, also a man of principle, he never risked in a fashion that put his true holdings at risk. Rest assured your legacy is quiet safe , you will never want for anything ever again" He could tell Margaret was thinking on something which roused his curiosity but he held back from making any inquiry.
She was still overwhelmed by the amount of money that Mr Bell had left her, but now the one thought running through her mind was "I can put it to good use, I could help him, but how? What would be the most beneficial?"
Later that evening when every one had retired Margaret sat at her desk thinking over her scheme. She desperately wanted to do this one small thing for him. A small sigh escaped her lips and her heart ached... oh how desperately she yearned to tell him everything and apologize for her harsh words. She wanted nothing more than to be reinstated in his good opinion and at least regain his friendship. His love for her was forever lost,this she knew as his cold,icy words were etched in her mind and heart "Any foolish passion on my part is entirely over..."
She resolved within herself never to dwell upon what might have been. But at times such as this when the household was quietly asleep that her strong resolve broke as memories of his earlier words echoed in her mind:"I have never loved any woman before - now I love, and will love." The deep tremor in his voice and the intently passionate look in his eyes as he uttered these words to her struck her with the intensity of a hot flame, envoking strange wild feelings within her.
At the time that he spoke those words she denied and fought against her true feelings along with her motives for rushing out to save Mr. Thornton. Now she clearly saw in the true light of day what had been building withing her since that fateful day of the riot.
She couldn't tell the exact time or place her love for Mr. Thornton began but her true feelings came surging to the surface the day of the riot; he was in danger, her all consuming thought was that she had to save him, and would have fought even the hounds of hell to protect him. Yet,when she came face to face with her true feelings, mirrored in Mr. Thornton's impassioned words on the day he proposed, she recoiled in horror, lashing out in the worst possible way. Her words to him were sharp and cutting, dealing him a mortal blow for inwardly his true, noble, tender heart bled, the evidence of his intense pain shown in the glean of his unshed tears.
It was that look of pure pain of heart that broke through her defenses and the walls she had built up around her crumbled. She never meant to hurt him in such a cruel way, and tried to reach out to him but to no avail. If she had only acted differently that day, she wouldn't be alone in London but at home in Milton with the only man she ever loved.
She found herself growing tired and stretched her arms out on the desk laying her head down. "He will never return my love or ever know of my deep feelings and respect for him but perhaps I could,I could ....." These were her last lingering thoughts as she drifted off to sleep.
Quietly Dixon stole into her room "Miss Margaret, wake up. Miss Margaret" she said softly urging the sleeping girl awake. "You should be in bed. Come now let me help you" Dixon gently assisted Margaret to her feet and settled her into bed. As Margaret drifted back to sleep she murmured Mr. Thornton's name....
Dixon, about to walk out of the room turned and knelt down beside Margaret, brushing away the stray dark curls that covered her lovely face and whispered softly "Did you say something dear?" but she received no reply. She tenderly caressed Margaret's silken hair, her heart breaking into tiny fragments as she studies her young face. She was not the delicate beauty her dear mama was but Margaret possessed a beauty interwoven with strength that served her well in the wake of all the sorrow and deep loss she suffered. But no amount of strength could hide from Dixon the deep sorrow that was always present in the depths of her expressive eyes. And even in her repose, her face still carried a look of regretful sadness.
Miles away in the damp dreary recesses of industry John sat at his desk looking over the most recent figures; growing ever more tired. When he found he could fight sleep no longer he allowed him the luxury of a few moments rest.
Lowering his head onto the desk his thoughts drifted towards Margaret. Her enchanting smile was forever etched into his mind, warming his heart like a delicious spring zephyr; blowing his cares away, and for a brief moment he almost felt her reach out to him, her voice wafting through the air softly calling his name. But that could never be for he knew within the debts of his very being that she did not love him and would never smile up at him, gazing into his eyes with the full honest look of true love, that was reserved for another, for one who did not deserve such loving looks; yet knowing this very fact,he still sorely loved her. He felt as a dying man does who yearns to hold onto the last ounce of life and breath within him, he yearned for Margaret in that same way for that's what she was to to him; his very essence, life, and breath. He felt certain that with every passing day she stayed in London his world would slowly turn to ash and he would no longer have the strength to keep going...
Sleep blessedly overtook John, his last lingering thoughts escaped his lips in a whispered breath "Margaret, my Margaret come home..."
Hannah entered her son's office to find him fast asleep across his desk. He slept little , which concerned her and felt it best to let him sleep so she removed her shawl placing it over his shoulders for warmth. She gently stroked his thick dark hair, anxiety creeping into her being as she took note of the care worn look that never left his face.
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