Alicia breaks into the land of the living with a groan, her body feeling as though it's been shredded to pieces.
"You're lucky," comes a voice close to her and Alicia turns her head and cracks her eyes open. Samantha stares at her, a grim set to her lips. "I was able to save your leg."
Alicia attempts to sit up, wrapping her arm around her abdomen. "Galya?" she asks, her throat like sandpaper.
"Alive and recovering quicker than you will. Try not to move." Sam eases Alicia back down with a hand on her shoulder. She grabs a flask from beside the bedroll Alicia lays on and helps her drink. Alicia grips the flask, her mouth parched and her desperation for water causes her to choke on it, dribbling it down her chin. She lays back with loud breaths and looks up at Sam.
"How bad?"
Sam shakes her head and looks towards the gaping hole in the crumbling stone they're in. "It's been a few years since I was in the army, I wouldn't trust my doctorate skills, but I did what I could. I didn't need to amputate and your kneecap was in one piece. Like I said, you were lucky."
"How long have I been out?"
"A few days." Samantha rubs her temples with her fingers. "Galya already told me it was Warren who did this."
Alicia is silent for a moment, her eyelids fluttering as she recalls everything that happened.
"Do you wish you'd killed him?" Sam asks, her voice causing Alicia to blink and meet her black gaze.
She thinks on the question. She's had many chances to kill Warren, and if she'd taken those opportunities then people wouldn't have suffered. If she'd killed him after what he'd done to Kathryn, then he would never have destroyed the Commons. If she'd killed him in the Commons, then she wouldn't have this bullet hole in her leg now.
But does she wish she'd killed him? Are all those people's lives lost in the Commons on her hands? Would she trade their blood for his?
The answer should be simple, but there are always more monsters in the world waiting in the shadows for their opportunity.
"It doesn't matter," Alicia says, her voice hard, and tries to sit up again, her body begging her to lay back down and sink into sweet nothingness. "It's all in the past and questioning my choices won't help our current situation."
Sam hums and sips at the flask, raising an eyebrow at Alicia. There's a knowing glint in her gaze that Alicia doesn't want to even begin to acknowledge. The girl doesn't know her, doesn't know why she made the choices she did. Half the time, Alicia doesn't even know anymore. But all she can do is continue pushing forward and right now her path is leading her back to Warren.
"If I need to kill him, I will."
Sam puts the flask down on the ground and turns back to the gap in the ruin that was perhaps once polished marble, but now it's wrapped in vines and moss. "Let's not make promises we can't keep, okay?"
Alicia rubs at her eye and lays down, thinking of such things causing a deep throb to begin in her head. Alicia doesn't want to remember any of it. She lets out a defeated sigh as she gazes up at the cracked stone above her.
"Sometimes you have to kill," Sam says. She looks at Alicia with heavy shadows swimming in her gaze.
Alicia meets that gaze for a moment before she turns away, unable to look at her, unable to see the blame in the girl's eyes. If she had done what she needed to in the past, Galya wouldn't be hurt and the Commons would still be standing.
"Taking a life is the hardest thing out here," Sam continues, "but sometimes it has to be done."
Alicia stares at the spiderweb cracks in the stone, her regard sightless as she remembers each and every life she's taken, etched into her soul like the bloody scratchings of a madman. She sees the blood drenching her hands, the crimson of her scarf so easy to hide the splatters of it. The Reaper's Curse reopened her wounds, poured salt into them, showed her things she had never wanted to see again. Every time she closes her eyes, she witnesses it all over.
"Killing is one of the easiest things I've ever done," she utters, her voice but a whisper. The words hang in the air like suffocating smoke, making Alicia's chest ache.
Living with souls whispering in her ear is the impossible part.
She takes a breath, forcing air into her lungs, forcing herself not to taste the smoke, not to smell the stench of charred flesh, not to remember the girls with their watery eyes and blistering flesh.
Her thoughts are broken as a hulking frame steps into the gap of the stone. The Ghul regards them both for a long moment and Alicia swallows the sudden dryness in her mouth. The creature is dressed in a worn tunic and breeches, gone is the ancient armour it once adorned. Now it tries to pass as something alive.
The creature walks in, heavy footfalls thudding on the stone, the stench of dust and mould lingering around it. "Their tracks lead east." The creature's voice is a deep rasp that makes Alicia cringe, but she focuses on its words instead of the monster.
"You're going after Warren?" Alicia asks.
Sam shoves her unruly curls behind her ears as she sighs. "No, just making sure he won't be interfering with our goal. I have no resources to spare to bring down Warren." She turns to Alicia. "Get some rest and don't move. Your leg needs to heal."
"What is your goal, Sam?"
Tilting her head, Sam flicks her black eyes to Alicia. "To find the cure to the Reaper's Curse." With that, Sam departs, taking her Ghul with her.
Alicia slumps back down on the lumpy cushions and furs, the pain in her leg a constant beat beneath her skin. Somehow she ignores it enough to close her eyes and fall asleep.
"Alicia."
She shifts, stirring from an uneasy rest, every move she makes causing pain to lance through her like barbed wire twisting around her flesh. She takes in even breaths to try and ignore the pain.
"Alicia, wake up."
Peeling her eyes open at the voice, Alicia blinks the graininess from her gaze as she tries to focus on the person who kneels beside her makeshift bed.
Galya settles her warm hand on her shoulder, a lantern glowing softly by her knees. "I'm sorry to wake you."
"It's fine," Alicia manages though it feels like a fistful of sand has been shoved into her mouth. "How are you?" The left side of Galya's face is a mess of lacerations and bruising, but the swelling is minimal.
"Better. Thanks to you."
"I'm sorry I couldn't do more."
Galya's hand squeezes before she glances over her shoulder at the opening in the stone. Beyond, night has fallen though Alicia can hear the crackle of fire and soft murmuring that may be Sam. "You saved us."
Alicia doesn't argue, doesn't tell her that she could have fought, that she could have ended Warren's life had she been strong enough. Instead she watches the girl fiddle with the edge of her cuff at her severed arm in the golden glow of the lamp, words clearly fighting to leave her lips.
"I brought you here because I don't trust the Ghuls," Galya begins, dropping her green gaze to Alicia's. "And because I fear Sam's judgement may be clouded by her grief. What I didn't tell you is that Sam stole the Faceless Queen's ancient tome from Lena. With it, she discovered how the Ghuls were made."
"What?" Alicia demands, sitting up.
"Ghuls, Alicia. They're us. Well... you."
Blinking at her, Alicia struggles to comprehend what she's saying.
"The Faceless Queen made Ghuls using dark magic and science ahead of her time. They're those who are immune to The Reaper's Curse. You, Sam, Oliver, all of those immune have the immortality of Ghuls in your blood. It's why you don't become Grey Bloods."
Alicia's stomach churns and bile rises in her throat as she tries to fathom the words Galya speaks. "Lena would have told me if she'd managed to translate that."
"Apparently the Ghuls helped Sam translate it."
Narrowing her eyes, Alicia stares beyond the stone where she knows those creatures lurk in the dark. "So, they understand the language the Faceless Queen wrote in, yet they've only translated parts of that book."
"Another reason we'd be foolish to trust them. They're only telling Sam what they want her to know."
"Giving her enough information to build trust but not enough to make her dangerous."
Galya nods.
Blowing out a breath, Alicia contemplates the severity of their situation. Surrounded by an army of Ghuls they can't trust, searching for a cure that may not exist, drawing nearer to a betrayal Sam refuses to see coming. Moments like these her longing for Oliver to be by her side grips her insides and wrenches.
She presses her hand to her stomach to will the sharp pang away, but nothing will make such a hurt abate. Nothing but having him with her again.
"What are we doing here? What is this place?"
"It's some ancient ruin, not the first they've been to. They're looking for a cure in the time the Curse was made."
"Makes sense. If the Ghuls are as old as the Curse, then it was made before Muovea's walls were even built."
"But what are they truly searching for in these ruins?" Galya asks, a question Alicia fears to look at too closely.
"For now we both need to focus on recovering. And we'll watch the Ghuls closely."
"You still hope the Ghuls have good intentions."
Alicia purses her lips, but she doesn't argue. Oliver would call it her bleeding heart, but he's not here and these trials she must face without him. Muovea is counting on them.