Before I knew it, October arrived and it was the night before our day off, and the day we were going to Ravensborough's Monthly Market.
"Shuyan," Beth said, tapping me on the shoulder after dinner, as we headed back to our rooms. "You've been looking a bit sad recently. What's wrong?"
"Nothing." I tried a smile. "It's good that we can go tomorrow. I'm really excited."
Me and Clo had grown distant since the night I told her about Eugene, but no one had noticed. For nearly a month I had no glimpse of Eugene, either.
"That's not the face of someone excited," Rhiannon said. I wondered if I really was that easy to read.
Clo didn't join in the conversation, pretending to be occupied with undressing herself.
"Shuyan, what exactly is it? You've been looking like you want to cry the last few days." When we went into our room, Beth closed the door behind us. "Is it Phillip? I will go and talk to him right now—"
"No, no, no!" I said, waving my hands. "I swear, it's not Phillip!"
"Mister Kupka then!"
"No! Beth!" I groaned. "It's nothing, really."
"Well, we cant have you going to town like that tomorrow." Beth suddenly went over to her trunk. "And tomorrow we can finally wake up later than usual, so let's play something tonight."
"Play?" Clo frowned. "What are you getting at?"
"I'm not playing," Rhiannon said, untying her apron. "I'd rather read a book."
"No!" Beth was suddenly insistent. "We will cheer up Shuyan and have a cozy girls' talk as we play this." She held a deck of cards above her head.
"Trumps?" Clo raised an eyebrow.
"Oh! This brings back memories," I exclaimed, clapping my hands together. "It was forbidden for the children to play cards because it counted as gambling, but we always sneaked a pack to play after lights-out in the orphanage."
They looked at me.
"I've never seen you so worked up about anything," Clo said. "Fine, we can play a bit. What about you?" She turned to Rhiannon. She shrugged, which we had learned was her way of agreeing.
"But we don't have a table," Beth said, "so let's bath and change into our sleeping gowns and play on my bed! Doesn't that feel cozy, too, like something sisters would do?" She giggled in excitement.
"Yes, like what I used to do with my younger siblings," Clo said.
After we bathed and changed, we all sat on Beth's bed. Beth pulled her blanket over herself, Rhiannon wrapped her white shawl over her crisp nightgown, and I let down my hair. Immediately Beth dealt out cards for Old Maid.
As we played, we also, without saying it out loud, started asking each other questions we wanted for a long time.
"I always wanted to ask you, Shuyan, do you not remember your parents at all?" Beth asked as she picked a card from my hand. I shook my head.
"What age were you given away?" Clo added.
"As a baby. Oh, I know my birthday, though. Apparently they told the nun it was on May fifth."
"I was born in February!" Beth said. "But then again, I'm younger than you. When were you born, Clo, Rhiannon?"
"August first," Clo replied as she picked up a card from Beth's hand.
"September eleventh." Rhiannon picked up a card and then made a face. She was comedically obvious. I hovered my finger before the cards, watching as her expression grew from being exasperated to excited.
"Do none of you—besides Shuyan, have siblings?" Clo asked.
"No," Rhiannon said.
"Nope," Beth also said. I finally picked a card and turned to Beth.
"What are your families like, then?" I had always been secretly interested in what type of family they grew up in.
"I hated my family, that's why I left," Beth said, turning up her nose. "I like being independent, anyways."
"Really? Now that's surprising," Clo teased.
"Really!"
"Fine, fine." Clo laughed. "As for me, I've got a nice family. Much nicer than the Beardsleys, at least. However, I had to leave to work, as the eldest. My mum fell sick after giving birth to Izzy, and my dad couldn't make ends meet."
She turned to Rhiannon. "What about you?"
Rhiannon looked at her. I wasn't sure if they were about to get into a fight or not, but then she replied, "I had no mother. She died giving birth. My father was an alcoholic. I hated him."
There was a tense silence.
"So then you left and started working at a young age?" Beth asked. I applauded her courage inside my head.
"Yes."
"On a happier note, why don't we talk about food we like?" We nodded in agreement. "Shuyan, you first!"
"I like pastries," I said. "I never had a lot so having them here is like a dream. Otis is amazing."
"He is!" Beth agreed. "But I think I love meat the most. Beef, mutton, bacon, and ham."
"That's once again, surprising," Clo said. "I always thought you, the one all sugar and spice, would like desserts, meanwhile Shuyan would have a more mature taste."
I laughed. "What about you?"
"Maybe mince pies. We only ever had them for holidays."
"And you, Rhiannon?"
"Custard or chocolate pudding."
"Oh, I have a question!" Clo said. "What's your favorite color?"
"Pink? Red? Or maybe baby blue?" Beth listed them on her fingers. "There's so many pretty colors, though!"
"I like blue best," I said. "It's very soothing."
"I prefer green," Rhiannon said.
"And I like red. Now, Rhiannon, your turn to ask a question."
"Why do I have to?" Rhiannon frowned.
"If you don't, Beth is going ask us questions like which master we prefer again." Clo rearranged her cards before letting go of them. "I won. I finished pairing up all of mine."
"Hey," Beth pouted. "Every girl dreams of romance!"
"Fine," Rhiannon sighed, "what's your favorite pastime?"
"Oh! I like hanging out with friends like this the most." I picked a card from her hand. It matched the one in my hand. "I'm finished! It's between Rhiannon and Beth!"
"Ooh, this is interesting," Clo said, looking at the two girls, who were staring at each other intensely. "As for me, I like cooking. You're next, Beth."
"I like dressing up and shopping the most." Beth picked a card from Rhiannon and cheered. She beamed. Rhiannon scowled. "Rhiannon lost!"
How unexpected, I thought to myself.
"And what about you?" Clo asked Rhiannon, who sulked as Beth hummed.
"Reading," she muttered.
"Say something else!" Beth demanded. Rhiannon stiffened.
"Maybe a bit of writing, then."
"What do you write?" I asked.
"Some stories."
"Do you want to become a writer?" Clo asked.
"No, it's just a silly thing I do for fun—I don't do it anymore." She looked flustered. "Anyways, let's play another game." She picked up the cards on the bed and shuffled them.
"Oh, let's tell each other our first impression of each other!" Beth always had the strangest ideas.
"Sounds fun," I said. "You go first."
"Sure." Beth never minded being the first to share her opinions. "For you, Shuyan, I thought you were sixteen when we first met. Or only a bit younger. Also, I want to say I like the perfume you use, lilies of the valley."
"You noticed?" I smiled, a bit happy. It was one of the only luxury I brought for myself. I brought the bottle after I left the church with what little money I saved from selling my embroidery. "Thank you."
"As for you, Clo, I think when I first met you I was excited to become friends with an adult—but then I realized you weren't."
"I'm twenty!" Clo exclaimed. "I am an adult!"
"You're only two years older than Shuyan and I, and sometimes you don't act like it," Rhiannon said.
"What?" Clo screeched.
"For my last one," Beth said, ignoring her, "I just wanted to say Rhiannon was really mean when we first met. Good thing she's not all that mean." Rhiannon didn't have much of a reaction at that. "Clo, you go next."
"Fine." She tapped her chin. "I agree with you about Rhiannon. As for Beth, you reminded me of my youngest sibling, Izzy, short for Isabelle, because you're talkative and affectionate. Shuyan reminded me of Jesse. He was quiet like her, and never stood up for himself."
"I stand up for myself," I said meekly. She raised an eyebrow in challenge.
"I don't know about that. I always feels like I have to protect you."
I went next.
"My first impression of Clo was that she was brave. She made Mister Kupka so angry—and he seemed so scary. As for Beth, I thought she was friendly and I was envious of how easily she got along with people. Rhiannon scared me in the beginning, but now I've came to realize she's just like us. She's had a rough past." I smiled. "I feel like we ended up here at Beardsley for a reason."
"Hmm," Rhiannon and Clo both muttered. It was quiet again, so I thought of a question.
"Oh, I won. Your turn, Rhiannon." Rhiannon sighed. She had picked up the old maid from my hand. She wasn't very good at keeping a poker face and immediately grimaced when Clo moved her finger from the card. Clo picked that card.
"I didn't have first impressions. I didn't come here to make friends."
"There you go again," Beth giggled. "Come on, just say it."
"Then I'll say it," Rhiannon said, rolling her eyes. "Clo, I always disliked how you pretended to be so wise and mature when inside you're so sensitive."
"What?"
"As for you, Beth, I thought the way you dressed was way too excessive, too. You are a maid—you'll only ruin those fancy dresses. And although you talk about Master Valentin's room being messy you're a disorderly person yourself. Lastly, Shuyan: you really have to be more honest with yourself. And stop mumbling and stuttering. Once you stand taller and speak louder you'll have more confidence even if nothing changed."
I was surprised, but pleased at what she said.
"Hmph!" Beth stuck out her tongue at her. "At least I don't wear old lady-like dresses all the way up to my ankles!"
"And at least we didn't lose—again!" Clo said, tossing down her last pair. Rhiannon grimaced as she held the old maid.
I chuckled, unable to help myself.
"Rhiannon, you need to keep a poker face," I said.
"I demand a rematch." She began shuffling the cards again, her slender and long fingers flying.
"Another?" Clo raised an eyebrow.
"I'm not sleeping until I win."
Beth, Clo, and I looked at each other and laughed amongst ourselves. It was going to be a long night.