"I thought you'd gone back to your quarters?" Harry questioned Elle when he finally found her as she had shards of glass carefully pulled from her hair by a nurse armed with a comb and a pair of long tweezers.
"I was on my way when the alarm sounded," she lied. "He pulled me into a shed just before the first rocket hit."
Harry turned to see who she was pointing to. "Jack! What happened mate? You get injured saving the damsel in distress?" Elle smirked behind Harry's back but Jack had a perfect view of her amusement as he got ribbed by his friend.
"Yah, I guess you could say that." Jack admitted reluctantly, while the nurse assigned to him stitched up his hand.
"Well I see you've met my newest charge then." Harry turned back to Elle and smiled. "You still up for tomorrow then?"
"Definitely." Elle said and she saw Jack's expression change as Harry began to explain what she'd be in store for the next day. She could feel the tension rise as Jack locked eyes with her, obviously upset with the choice she'd made.
"Are we done here?" Jack curtly asked the nurse as he reached over to grab his cap before purposefully placing it back on his head.
Elle wasn't listening as Harry went on; her attention instead was on the exchange between Jack and his nurse.
"Well it could probably use a few more just to make sure it heals neatly," she reasoned as she went to begin another stitch.
Jack jumped up before she could. "It looks great to me." His voice was still strained, "thanks." And walked out of the triage area.
Elle pulled away from the nurse and began to stand. 'Uh, excuse me a moment." And she made her way into the hallway as she said over her shoulder, "I really need to thank him, I'll be right back." She saw the door at the end of the hall swing closed and she darted towards it bursting into the twilight filled sky. She saw him walking across the dusty area that served as a parking area for military vehicles and ran after him.
"Jack!"
He stopped when he heard her call his name and turned to face her, his expression was stoic, catching Elle off guard.
"What's wrong? What did I do?" she was genuinely confused by his sudden turn. They had argued at first, but then, made that connection again, and now he was indifferent and cold. "I honestly don't know what's going on."
Jack suppressed his anger at her decision to put herself in harms way, but still made it clear that he was all business. "Nothing's wrong Elle. You have work to do and so do I; just getting on with it, is all." He could see the hurt in her eyes as she struggled to make sense of his abrupt turn.
"But, in the shed," she obviously replayed the events from that afternoon, "the way you spoke to me, and you protected me, and..."
He cut her off before she could say anything else and grabbed her by the shoulders as he spoke purposefully to her, inches from her face. "Listen to me. I did those things because it's what I'm trained to do and I was only trying to convince you to go home rather than stay here. It's too dangerous for you, and for me, to have you here." He released her from his grip and turned to walk away.
"Dangerous for you?!" Her temper was flaring and it stopped him again. "How do you figure that?!" She demanded drawing attention to their disagreement.
Jack turned back and got close again. "Would you keep your voice down." He hissed. "This isn't Coronation Street." When she gave him a puzzled look, he closed his eyes and shook his head in exasperation. "Never mind."
"Why is it dangerous for you, Jack?" She whispered as she glanced around to see if people were still looking in their direction. When she looked back to him again, she saw his expression had softened briefly, but his seriousness came back when he reluctantly answered her.
"Because you distract me, Elle." Although spoken matter of factly, his tone was also sincere and she sighed her understanding as her features gave up the stubborn fierceness that he'd seen more than once already, and were replaced with a soft expression of realization. He continued, "Getting distracted out here can get you killed." Jack let his words sink in before he finished. "I know you probably won't, but go home. Please." He looked at her and for a moment let down his guard so she could see his concern was genuine , before he turned and walked away from her.
.......................................................................................................................................
Although Elle wanted desperately to get some sleep she tossed and turned instead as the day replayed in her mind. She finally sat up and put her jeans on pulling the hem of the fitted pink t-shirt she was wearing down towards her hips. She ran her fingers through her hair and silently cursed her plight. She slipped her boots on and just tucked the laces in before she got up and made her way to the door, slipping outside as silently as she could.
Walking down the narrow road that was lined with the barracks assigned to officers and temporaries, Elle crossed her arms and kept her head down as she didn't want to be approached by anyone. She needed to sort out her thoughts. She was confused by Jack's hot and cold demeanor and while logic told her to look at the whole thing practically, no matter how hard she tried, the facts kept getting muddled with her feelings about those facts.
Fact: she knew they had the potential for a deep connection, and she honestly thought that was a good thing.
How on earth could having a genuinely honest friendship with someone be a bad thing? And then the feeling would screw it up. It could be bad if that connection is only important to one of the two people...that's how you get hurt.
So she'd ignore the contradiction and move on to the next thing.
Fact: Jack was right, it was dangerous, but she had actually been sent there to work and was expected to go home with a story. Portia was constantly reminding her that she didn't think Elle took her assignments seriously enough , which was why she'd not been promoted out of the lifestyle column. This could really be her chance to prove that she had what it took to be a serious journalist. Then, the feelings would jump in to the mix.
But what about Jack? She couldn't deny that he meant something to her, but she just didn't know what yet. No matter what though, she didn't want to make things difficult or dangerous for him..or lose whatever it was that they had started.
Unable to make a decision she'd move on the the next thing.
Fact: Portia fully expected an article about her encounter with Jack. With this one, the feelings always came immediately.
There was no way she was going to write about her relationship with Jack. Which is exactly why she had turned down his offer to write about them instead of going on patrol when they were taking cover in the shed earlier. What she hadn't confided when he'd asked her the reason, was that she felt a possessiveness about the relationship they were forming. She'd never experienced anything like it before and the thought of sharing something that was so precious to her (with the whole world) made her feel like it would lose it's charm. Having others know of the inexplicable trust she felt for someone she'd only just met, would surely make it vanish, she feared. People's comments and opinions on something she couldn't properly explain because she didn't fully understand it herself would surely cause her feelings of blissful contentment to be extinguished, and there was no way she was going to give that up. Unless, eventual circumstances just caused it to naturally fade away into a happy memory of a time gone by. Which, she was sure, was the most likely outcome. But for now, it was hers, it made her happy (for the most part) and she chose not to share it.
"Elle!" She was jolted from her thoughts by Harry calling to her. She looked up and saw him jogging over. "Hey, you should come over and have a drink. There's a bit of dancing going on too. Nothing fancy, just some guy's portable stereo."
She looked over to where patio lanterns were strung along the railing of the boardwalk, casting a warm glow over the sand and the modest group of people that were dancing and joking as they nursed their sodas.Before she could protest, Harry had taken her hand and was guiding her towards the spontaneous gathering.
"Come on, dance with me." He insisted as he began to move to the lively song that was emitting from the speakers on a nearby table. Reluctantly, she joined in, but soon found that the company of others and a cold beverage was just what she needed to give her mind a break.
Jack sat, hidden in the shadows up on the boardwalk and watched the group dance as he finished off his drink. Draining the last of it, he leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees while he absentmindedly rolled the empty bottle between his hands. He got lost in his thoughts as he watched her dance and she eventually began to to smile.
Why did she have to come here? This isn't how or where I want to spend time with her. Do I even want to spend time with her? Jack contemplated that question as Elle was twirled under Harry's upheld hand. He was intrigued by her. The way she stubbornly stood her ground with him made him want to know what made her tick, yet at the same time it drove him mad with anger. She had a sincerity about her too though and Jack instinctively felt he could trust her. But what was that bit about earlier when she wouldn't tell me why she doesn't want to write about us? I thought we had some honest conversations before, why did she not want to tell me that? He couldn't deny that there was something about the way she'd written to him, and now spoken to him, that drew him to her. When she looked at him it was hard for him to be angry with her even when he had every right to be. And that's exactly why she needs to go! This isn't the time or place to be dealing with feelings for someone. Do I have feelings for her? His own thoughts confused him. What have we started? A wave of panic washed over him as he considered whether or not this was the start of a relationship. Suddenly the thought of having her terrified him, but the idea of not getting to know her more made him certain that he'd be mising out on something, but what? And whatever it was, had he it ruined it by his cold treatment of her? He then recalled what had caused him to be so stern with her in the first place. The patrol! His anger rose up again at he thought of the danger she'd be in tomorrow. She really has no idea what could happen! She's lucky she wasn't killed today for God's sake! He looked down at the stitches in his hand and recalled where that hand had been when the shed had blown apart around them. His temper subsided as he wondered if she realized that he'd had it tangled in her hair on the back of her neck. The thought of what could have happened to her caused him to swallow hard as he looked up again in time to see Harry take her in his arms as a love song began to play.
The jealousy that surged through him caught him by surprise but he dismissed it as he stood and walked down the steps into the subtle light of the lanterns and the distant lamp post. He weaved through the small crowd and placed his empty bottle on one of the tables and continued to where Harry was slowly turning her to the music as Elle rested her head on his shoulder.
"Would you mind, Harry?" Jack asked but sounding more like Harry wasn't really being given an option.
Harry stepped away from Elle and gracefully swept his hand towards her, allowing Jack to cut in before he offered his hand instead to a female soldier who was sitting at one of the tables talking to her friend.
They didn't speak as Elle looked into Jack's eyes trying to read his mood. He slipped his injured hand down to the small of her back and took her hand in his good one. He smiled a bit, in spite of himself as he felt her other hand rest on his shoulder, but he was quick to pull her closer so she wouldn't see his pleasure from her response to him. As they began to sway to the music Jack felt her relax as she turned her head to rest it on his chest. He tipped his face down and rested his cheek on the top of her head as he rubbed his hand gently up and down her back. She loosened her grip on his hand and turned her wrist before she entwined her fingers with his. In return, Jack stroked her hand with his thumb and took in the scent of her hair as he closed his eyes and got lost in the feeling of her in his arms.
This is seriously not a good idea. He thought, and then tried to justify it to himself. No, but she's here right now and it feels like, right now, in this moment, that this is where she belongs. Jack's admission to himself actually made him feel, for the briefest moment, that familiar and undesired emptiness in his chest that he recognized as heartbreak. It caused him to raise his head suddenly and he looked down where her head still rested on his chest. What the hell am I doing? Knowing where it would lead if they went down that road. Well I don't know for certain, do I? Nothing's certain, is it? But his stubborn logic jumped in. If I pursue this, it will end badly, and badly isn't something I want to feel again. She has to go.
As the song ended, he pulled away from her but kept her hand in his, "Can I walk you back?"
She nodded at him, still not sure what to say as she just couldn't read him properly and didn't want to start another argument.
They walked for a bit in silence until they were out of the reach of the light they had just danced in, not realizing that Harry had been watching them go.
"Are you still angry with me?" she ventured as she relished the feeling of his hand still entwined with hers.
"Are you still going out tomorrow?" He replied as he guided them back to her quarters, his expression serious in the moonlight.
"Yes." She said as she looked up to him.
And for the first time that night, he looked into her eyes. "Then, yes, I am." His blood boiled when the corner of her mouth turned up in a slight smile. He knew why she did it; she knew that he had a soft spot for her, and the fact that his vulnerability had been discovered made him angrier. "You have no idea what you could be in for tomorrow Elle!" He spoke quietly, but there was no mistaking his frustration with her. "People die out there! People that are trained for combat! You aren't!"
Her smile was gone and her guilt was back as they reached the entrance of her quarters. She stepped up on to the first step and turned to face him as he let go of her hand. She was eye to eye with him now as she responded to the anger that was evident in his expression. "I'm sorry Jack, but I really have no choice. What would your commanders think if all of a sudden I changed my mind and refused to go? If they find out why I was really sent here it will have repercussions for more than just me, my whole profession really and maybe you too. No one would ever hire me again if I blew my cover, so to speak." She looked down at his injured hand and gently pulled it up to examine it. He watched her as she traced her finger gently around the wound and his expression relaxed at her touch.
"I can't see you again, Elle." He was surprised at how the words made him feel as he spoke them.
She looked back to his handsome face and smiled her understanding. "Okay." She said softly. "Thank-you." She leaned in and kissed him, softly on his cheek, lingering for a second before she pulled away.
Jack looked puzzled. "For what?"
"For this." Elle raised his injured hand that she still held before she released it and turned to walk up the steps.
Jack watched her until the door closed, quietly behind her. She knows.