Paris
I saw his back stiffen. Even that bit of reaction from him made me anxious. Parang gusto kong tumakbo palayo.
God, is it really too late to back down now?
He turned around and I forced myself to stand my ground. Hindi ako makapaniwalang nakakaramdam ako ng kaunting kaba.
The slight shock on his face was evident. But then, just like always, it vanished. And so did the somber atmosphere around the place.
"Well, look who's here," he quipped, wearing that annoying smirk on his face.
My anxiety disappeared fast. Ang tanging naramdaman ko na lang ay ang pagkakairita sa lecheng ngisi niya.
I opened my mouth to speak but he cut me off.
"Akala ko ba 'don't talk to me again'?" he mocked playfully. "What brings you here, then?"
Ni hindi ako makasagot agad dahil alam kong mailalabas ko na naman ng wala sa oras ang inis ko kapag sinagot ko siya.
This conversation was unfolding swiftly. I wasn't expecting him to go straight to the point. I mean, can't he build up the momentum first? Seriously!
"I.."
I didn't know how or what to tell him. I was never good with words. I rarely apologized. Ni hindi ako humihingi ng tawad kay Venny kapag nag-aaway kami. It was either she apologized first, or I talk to her like nothing ever happened. That's how we patched things up. Kaya naman lubos akong nahihirapan ngayon dahil hindi ako sanay sa bagay na 'to.
Parang gusto kong bawiin na lang ang lahat. Sabihin sa kanya na wala talaga akong rason kung bakit ako nandito. Na sadyang napadaan lang ako o ano. But, hello? Who would fall for that?
"I came here to say sorry for what happened earlier." There. I finally found the courage to say it.
"Earlier?" His expression puzzled. Para bang wala siyang ideya kung ano ang ibig kong sabihin. "Bakit? Ano bang nangyari kanina?"
Kinalimutan niya na lang ba talaga agad 'yon? Was our encounter that unimportant or was it because I wounded his ego too badly?
I sighed. Either ways, I'd just remind him, then. Baka ganito talaga kapag nagso-sorry ang isang tao. The person needs to admit and recognize his or her mistakes.
"Yung mga sinabi ko sa'yo sa library-" I stopped mid-sentence upon seeing the look on his face. Nothing much had changed. He was still standing in front of me. Pero...
Nagpipigil siya ng tawa!
Do'n ko lang napagtanto na inaasar niya lang ako. He wasn't puzzled! He knew exactly what I was talking about! Nagmamaang-maangan lang talaga ang gago.
This time, I couldn't control my temper anymore. I was pissed, and it showed.
"Screw you, Martinez." I said, glaring. My voice was filled with so many negative emotions, I hoped he felt each one of them.
Argh! Bakit sa lahat ng pwede kong isigaw na pangalan, sa kanya pa talaga?
Heck. I could've just said something like, 'Si Zac Efron ang gusto ko, okay?!' o pwede ring si Lee Min Ho. I don't know. Anyone! Anyone who would spare me the hassle of apologizing and pretending to be head over heels for them.
My frown deepened when I heard him laugh a little. I watched him place the soccer ball between his arm and his hip.
"Okay, I'm sorry." aniya. Bakas pa rin ang ngiti sa labi. "You just really looked like you were having a hard time."
'Well, I sure did.' I thought.
"Look," I eyed him seriously. "Just accept my apology."
"Only if you do one condition."
"What 'condition'?"
"Hmm. Let's see," His eyes shifted and he tilted his head to the side, as if thinking. And then, once he came up with an idea, he held my gaze again. "How about a kiss?"
For a moment, my brain seemed to have a hard time processing what he said. I felt my cheeks turn red as though all my blood rose up and went there.
A kiss? Is he fucking kidding me?
Agad akong umalma. "Martinez-"
"Teka, bakit ba 'Martinez' ang tawag mo sa'kin?" he suddenly asked without even letting me finish. "I told you before to call me by my first name, right?"
Puno ng pagtataka ang boses niya. And like magic, the outburst I was determined to have just a second ago was immediately forgotten. Parang wala na akong balak pang ipagpatuloy 'yon. I was tired, alright. This was bloody tiring.
Rolling my eyes, I provided a brief explanation. "Una sa lahat, ang weird ng Ezzio. Pangalawa, napapangitan ako sa Z."
I honestly hoped for him to be offended. Kahit konti lang. However, I should've known better. Of course, the bastard still managed to turn the tables around.
"So, sa Martinez naguwa-guwapuhan ka?"
He was grinning wide. It was infuriating.
"Pwede ba?" naiinis kong sabi. Wala na akong pakialam kung matarayan man siya sa'kin. Okay, I knew I shouldn't because I ought to make him believe I like him. That was what I came here for, in the first place. But sometimes, he's just too annoying for me to handle! I couldn't help it.
I expected him to counter my statement again but nothing happened. Surprisingly, he stayed silent. Gusto kong magsalita na lang para basagin ang katahimikan pero wala rin akong masabi. And so, we just continued to look at each other, eye to eye. It wasn't exactly uncomfortable. In fact, it was the most peaceful moment we've had between us that day. It was almost like.. a cease fire. Like a break from our banters and heated remarks.
"Apology accepted," he suddenly said a few seconds later. I blinked. "You can go now."
Hindi ko mapigilang magulat. That was so out of the blue. Also, I couldn't help but feel like there was more to what he said. It was as if.. he was actually letting me off the hook.
He was giving me a choice. Fight or flight. And if I had chosen the latter, I would've just walked away and left him right there. I would've just ran for my life while I still can. As easy as that.
But then, I felt an impulse. And the next thing I knew, the words fell out just when he was about to turn his back on me.
"I like you."
Nakita ko ang pagtigil niya. Iniangat niya ang kanyang mukha para tingnan ako. There was a blank expression on his face. Isang ekspresyong hindi ko mabasa.
I waited for him to answer. And he did. But all he said was, "You like me?"
Yes. He said exactly the same thing as yesterday.
I detected a hint of mockery in his voice. It seemed like this time, he was actually showing me that he didn't believe me. At hindi ko mapigilang isipin na baka nga totoong hindi niya ako pinaniniwalaan.
I felt myself shiver as I watched the corners of his lips stretch upward. Agad akong kinabahan nang nagsimula siyang maglakad palapit sa'kin. There was a certain glint in his eyes.
He spoke while slowly closing the distance between us. "Paris Belle Villaverde, the ever consistent DL and the one LMU students look up to in terms of academic excellence, likes me?" uttering the last words, he stopped just a few inches away.
He was so close. Too close. I could smell his manly scent. I could feel his warmth. Heck, I could even hear him breathe. It was as if my body forgot to function. Hindi ko magawang gumalaw. Hindi ko magawang itulak siya palayo. Ni hindi ko magawang umatras. Everything felt numb except for one thing: my heart.
The beating inside my chest was too loud. I didn't think it was possible for it to beat even louder until Ezzio started to lean his face closer to mine. My breathing hitched, but that was it. That was the only thing I could manage. Tila ba tuluyan na akong naging estatwa sa harap niya.
His lips were still forming a smile. It looked pinkish and soft. I certainly didn't want to focus on that part so I moved my gaze higher, but I didn't know which was worse- gazing at his lips or looking straight into his eyes? Because that was what happened. His eyes met mine. Those brown orbes delved deep within me.
Napansin ko ang dahan-dahang pagpawi ng ngiti niya. Suddenly, he went serious, and the more I stayed that close to him, the more I felt a little scared. He was like a dark force looming over me.
"Prove it," I heard him say. "Prove it, Paris."