"Where is this bastard?!"
"J—Jungkook please do—"
"Jungkook listen to me," Jaemin stepping closer to me to stand behind me interrupts my sentence, not even thinking how dangerous this is. "You get the fuck out of my house!" his jaw clenches but he holds himself back once he gets to my level, Jaemin standing way too close to me for him to do something bad.
"Listen to me please! I'm begging you!" Jaemin gets down on his knees right next to me, asking for Jungkook to just let him talk. However, this will not work. "Y/n. Get in the bedroom."
I shake my head while gazing at him, defying the man I should not contradict at this moment. "I know what you're going to do Jungkook...and I can't leave you here alone with him..." I step forward to get to him and put my arms around his body, but he catches my arms and tosses them away. He never did this. "You get in the bedroom, y/n. I won't repeat myself again."
"Jaemin please leave," I turn towards him, talking to him to make sure he will do it since I'm the one saying it. He looks into my eyes for some long seconds but gets back up, to walk away while having Jungkook's stare on him. "I'm gonna fucking k—"
"No!" I raise my voice at him but step before him to push him back, my distress taking over me and letting my feelings just burst. "Stop always hurting people because you get mad and jealous! Why couldn't you let him talk—"
"Stop being so fucking naive!" he shouts at me, his intimidating eyes piercing my own ones as he used a lilt of voice he never did before to address me, the deepness of it sending shivers down my spine and taking me aback. "When will you stop believing that son of a bitch?! After all the things he did and caused to you why the fuck are you so dumb and still fucking talking to him as if he never had done anything?! Do you want to go back to him?! To have us both and see him when I'm at work for him to fuck you just like he must have done while I wasn't here today?!"
I grip onto my sleeves, shocked by his reaction and words. The entire house sinks into an unbearable silence, my throat aching at the knot about to release and engender a flow of tears through my eyes. We both stare at each other without doing a single thing, both not knowing what to say or if this whole thing is reality or just a nightmare.
My trembling hands loosen their grip but without willing to, the tears escape from my eyes. No words come out of my mouth, so I just step away to leave this room and head upstairs.
I burst into tears now that I'm all alone, only having Koya with me to enter the bedroom and both be together only. I cry my eyes out and take my luggage, to throw it on the bed and get my clothes ready to fill the suitcase.
He went way too far, I never used those types of words even when I was mad at him. I can't believe he hurled his wrath out on me.
I take off the sweater that doesn't belong to me and drop it on the bed, to use my own hoodie and put yoga pants on, before taking everything I own in here in order to land them on the bed and put everything in the luggage.
I cannot stop crying, he truly hurt me and that moment when he yelled with those spiteful words, I physically felt my heart aching. As I'm totally drowning in the pain, I drift my eyes away for a second, seeing and hearing Koya struggling to jump onto the bed too high for him. I pick him up the floor to put him over the blanket, but as soon as I have him in my arms, he licks my face when this is something I don't really like. Since I know the reason why he's doing it, I just smile through the pain and keep him in my arms.
I know he's trying to comfort me, this is even more overwhelming for me. I'm pretty sure he's stressed just because of me lately. I sob like a ridiculous shit and sit down on the mattress, to hug him and feel him being there for me.
"My baby..." my shaky voice leaves my mouth weakly, my tears rolling down my face and my heart beating hard and hurting me. I press a kiss on his head but hold him close to me while putting the rest of my clothes in my luggage. Thank god he's here otherwise I would never have been able to live until now.
I don't take too much time since I want to get out of this house, even though my stuff is not well placed in there, I close it the best way I can and put it down on the floor, to do the same with my puppy and both lead us out of the room.
No matter how hard it is for me, I grab the handle of the luggage and carry it down the stairs as Jungkook just saw me and rose from the sofa. "What are you doing y/n?"
I don't say a word anymore, waiting for Koya to be at the end of the stairs with me that is hard for him to reach quickly with his small legs. "Y/n, we both know this isn't serious baby—" his hand touching my arm flies away at my sudden reaction, not liking it on me at this moment.
"I'm too dumb to understand so don't talk to me anymore, I don't want you to waste your time," I speak in a quavering tone I can barely maintain stable and I walk up to the front door while being followed by Jungkook and my baby. "Y/n, stop this," he grasps my item, halting the casters of it to step before my body and tower me with his height "You know I didn't mean any of my words y/n, please...stay here...I'm sorry for the words that I used baby but don't go...I didn't mean to say those things...I won't be able to handle anything without you—"
"You are losing your time with the dumb and naive bitch that I am," I look straight into his glisten eyes with my teary ones. "You talked to me as if I was a slut only because I spend time with my best friend...You hurt me like ever, Jungkook..." I sniffle but put my shoes on to make my way out of the house without any coat or jacket, having Koya following me from very close to both end up in my car.
I let him on the back seats, my luggage just right next to me. Without putting my seatbelt on, I start the car and get on the road towards my house, this one I haven't seen in a while.
•••
8 pm.
'JUNGKOOK'S P.O.V'
My eyes staring at my screen to wait for an answer, I turn it upside down to have the screen on the blanket and let myself bawl out unceasingly in my bed. Seven hours have passed and I feel like dying, nothing can make me stop crying my whole life out. I've never been separated from her for such a reason and now that this is happening, I realize how hopeless I am without her. The emptiness she provoked after leaving is impossible to stand.
I cannot stop replaying the scene, the sight of her body shaking in front of mine and the tears I caused whether from fright or grief. This tortures me.
A sudden pain in my chest forces me to sit up quickly, my hand flying to it. The beating of my heart is totally irregular, aching my chest with each strong thump of it, I try to calm down as all of them are taking my breath away.
Something is wrong, I don't know why I'm feeling that way but I'm under the impression that something is not okay with y/n. I need to see her. I grab my phone but get out of my bedroom in a rush, to reach the stairs out quickly and walk them down.
Without any warning, a second painful sensation overcomes me, my chest aching and making me hold onto something close to me, I'm on the verge of fainting, I'm lightheaded and this time, my heart isn't stopping its hard thumping to make me go through a real agony as I can feel myself going.
Everything around me turning blur, no time to even realize what is happening to me, my eyes close and my body collapses onto the floor.
— Next day —
040519.
7 am.
"Thank you sir....yeah...I will..." some words echoing through the room drags me out of my unconscious state, my eyes feebly opening to let the light in. Why the hell do these surroundings seem so unfamiliar to me?
I fight against my condition to have a better look at the room, my head turning to the side with a lot of difficulties as I can feel a severe weakness coming from my entire body. I lay my eyes on the only person in here but slowly realize that a part of my face is covered by a mask, an oxygen one.
What the hell happened?
"Jungkook?" the last person I wanted to see close to me approach my hospital bed, his eyes on me making mine glance away. I need y/n urgently, not this asshole.
"Where is she?" I faintly let out, my eyes closing again as all I'm asking for is to see the one I love. The distress is still overwhelming me and I can hear the beating of my heart coming out of the machine right by my side. "She's okay...and I know you don't want me here but she's the one who asked me to be with you."
My eyes jerk in Jaemin's direction at the sound of his sentence. I lift my hand up to my face with a feebleness I never felt in my body but remove my mask. "Where is she?"
"Listen...don't panic," he attempts to calm me down, doing worse than planned. "She's in here too but she is alright."
My heart skips a beat, imagining my baby in a hospital bed and worrying about her and what could have happened. All of this is my fault, once again.
"I need to see her," I straighten up without caring about the wires connected to my body and the pain going with it. However, he puts me back onto the bed. "No, Jungkook...this isn't a good idea. She needs some time."
"Why...? What happened?" I barely speak, finding it hard as hell to pronounce just a word. "I don't know how the hell this is possible but...you both had an attack or loss of consciousness at almost the same moment...we don't know exactly what happened but while you only fainted...y/n went through worse..."
"What?" I dart my eyes on him, my heart breaking at the thought of something horrible. "When I found her in her house her body was paralyzed and I could not even open her hands that were all clenched and closed...the doctor said that was caused by tetany...and...I remember that she already had an anxiety attack who caused her the same thing a long ago. Her heart easily beats way too fast and once she's panicking and crying too much...this happens."
Wait...I can remember an acute pain that went through my body right before fainting. Could that have happened to her at the same moment...? No...this cannot be possible.
"The first thing she said when she woke up was your name..." he steps back, his tone of voice changing. "But she's really hurt..."
"I need to see her...right now..." an overwhelming sorrow drags me down, my heartbeat accelerating the more I'm thinking about her and feeling too afar from her. "She told me what happened between you two but...I swear to god Jungkook...she loves you and would never cheat on you. I would never have sex with her either and even if I kissed her, I was just not thinking straight and I was mad at you at that moment..."
"Get out of here...I don't want you in my room..." I don't make eye contact with him, not wiping my tears away but just letting them roll down my face. I put my mask back on and think about my baby. "Jungkook...you don't want to lose her...so stop acting like that. She loves you more than anything and the only thing you're doing because of your possessiveness and jealousy is hurting her...you know the reason why you lost your ex's...and we both know you wouldn't want to lose y/n..."
"Shut up..." my emotions take the control of me to cause some more tears, hating to be hearing the truth from his disgusting mouth. He sighs at my reaction but sits down on the chair close to my bed. "Are you really going to treat me like that for the rest of your li—"
"Get the fuck out of here," I shoot my eyes to him, pulling my oxygen mask down as the anger is now boiling my blood. "I will never forgive you for the things you did and caused to y/n, so leave my fucking sight or I call the nurse to drag you out of my room."
My harsh words finally make him react the way I wanted him to, his eyes fixed on the floor as I must have shaken him. No matter what my words will provoke to him, I do not give a damn about it anymore, he's nothing for me from now on.
As soon as he closes the door behind him, I put my mask back on but turn to my side, my tears never ceasing but only increasing now that I'm alone. Since he told me what happened to y/n, I cannot stop thinking about the pain she must have gone through because of me and my toxic behavior. I should never have yelled at her the way I did, least of all used those types of words. I'm horrible.
Feeling the water escaping from my eyes in too big amounts, I pull my mask down and wipe my tears away, in order to look for some tissues, grab a few ones and blow my runny nose.
I need her hugs and touches, I need to hear her voice and see her features exuding happiness only. I cannot forget the grief and fright that was drawn upon her face because of me, I won't ever forget it and this is torturing my mind.
"Dammit..." I snivel but look out the window, the rain hitting them with some sun warming me up just at the sight of it. No matter how destroyed I am from the inside, I'm glad and relieved to know that she's not alone right now, this is the most important for me.
I feel like I don't need to stay here though, I don't want to. I listen to myself and remove all the injections connected to my body, before doing so to my mask. Once all of this is done, I use all my strength to heave my legs out of the bed and with a hold onto the end of the bed, I get onto my feet.
My weak knees almost causing me to collapse, I groan but head towards the table where my clothes are. I grab them and take off what I have, to replace it with these ones I'm used to wearing. Once I'm finally comfortable in them, I retrieve my phone and get out of here, to look for a nurse or whoever I can find and who could help me.
In case I could maybe bother one of them during their work, I head to the reception and immediately ask a question. "Miss...could I know which room Han y/n is in?"
"Han y/n?" she checks into her files, giving me anxiety just with her slowness. "She's in the room one-hundred and twenty-two," her answer leaving her mouth, I thank her right away and quickly rush towards the room.
I can feel my heart pounding at the thought of seeing her after what happened. I expect it to be awkward but I don't even care, I just want to see her.
My eyes scanning the different numbers, as soon as I come across the ones I wanted to see, I walk up to it but knock on the door first, not sure that she would want to see me yet. This might cause a certain amount of stress just from seeing me now but I don't know.
The door opens without anyone speaking, my eyes falling upon a man I know well before darting to the bed in this room. Yohan isn't here anymore as he was supposed to be but she's there, I feel like I haven't seen her in years. "Y/n—" my body gets stopped by the man's hand, this one laying his eyes on me but then checking on my girl I want to see and feel close to me. "She doesn't want to see you now..."
I keep my gaze fixed on y/n, not believing those words that would never come from her. She averts her eyes from mine with an expression full of grief, fiddling with her fingers but acting as if I wasn't here.