— Next day —
031519.
5:30 am.
My morning alarm resounds through the room, my body rolling onto the mattress instantly for me to lie down on my back and reach my phone out. Feeling the female body against mine, I make fast to stop the alarm from ruining my mood and turn back towards y/n, to embrace her tightly and nestle my head in the crook of her neck.
The warmth of her body in the morning when I was used to spending all my nights and days all by myself is like living again. I love this feeling of being with someone.
No matter how much I would want to stay here, I press a kiss on her neck but open my eyes, to gaze at her morning face I never got to see. A peaceful feeling brings a smile to my face and I brush her cheek, to press a kiss on her lips delicately and then leave the bed. I'm really not in the mood to work today, I barely slept last night and feel the lack of energy in my body, I'm used to working out but this time this was totally different.
I stay sit on the edge of the bed, grabbing hold of my phone to check my texts and schedule. I feel so worn out that my eyes can barely focus and my phone feels heavy as hell.
Since I'm the boss I could take a day off but then this would be unfair for y/n if she has to go to not make it seem suspicious. I heave a sigh but check on my baby girl behind me, to bend over her and pass my hand through her hair and stand up.
I'm not going to wake her up but let her sleep here and have a day off, I already know she must be exhausted and her body must ache a lot. Since I only took a pair of sweatpants last night to sleep with something on by her side, I fix what's inside and just head to the bathroom, I need to take a shower, brush my teeth and put my black shirt with my white trousers once I'll have applied all my beauty and skin products.
Then after one hour spent in my bathroom, I'll have to cook breakfast I never eat but which I will only prepare for y/n.
Once I start I never stop.
•••
6:40 am.
I walk back up the stairs in quick seconds, the food waiting to be eaten on the dining table. I enter the bedroom and head towards the baby still sleeping, to be sweet and gentle in my actions but bend over her and wake her up.
"Y/n..." I rub her belly over the blanket covering her body, being the most tender possible for her morning to be pleasant and calm. She cutely opens her eyes, her messy hair making me giggle even more than her little morning face trying to adapt to the situation. "Hmm..." she grimaces but rubs her eyes, those that are not ruined by the makeup anymore because of me. She must have forgotten that she still had makeup on last night but she that is impossible for her to know that I removed it right before going to sleep as well.
"I cooked some food for you but I need to leave for work," I smile at her and straighten up. "And Mister Jeon allows you to take a day off to recover from last night."
"What...? Why didn't you wake me up Jungkook...?" she gapes and seeks for her phone, maybe wanting to see what time it is. "Because I want you to rest. Now stop annoying with by arguing and just keep sleeping if you want, I put the food in small Tupperware in case you wouldn't want to wake up yet."
"Ya..." she drops her head on the pillow, huffing as if I had done something bad. "Shut up and sleep," I act rude and bend over her, to cup her cheeks and press a kiss on her forehead before walking away. "Feel at home here, everything is yours," I let out on the way to the outside to make sure she won't be afraid to use anything in here and I then leave to not hear her complaining.
I honestly would have liked to stay here all day long with her, to take care of her, give her a massage since her body must be in pain, but also make sure she eats well.
The only thing that makes it hard for me to feel deeply dived into some sort of "love" is that I keep on wondering what I am for her. What if I'm nothing but just her fuck buddy? Someone she wants only to have sex or please her? No matter that appearance and image I give myself in front of everybody which could make people believe I'm just a dominant man who bangs a lot of girls when he wants to, this isn't the case at all.
Deep inside, I'm a caring and insecure guy who just wants a woman to love him sincerely and not for my face or body. The problem is that I won't know what kind of person she really is until I will have asked her, I maybe went too fast, I maybe misunderstood what Jaemin told me. She might be using me for sexual satisfaction and nothing else.
This hurts when I think about it but I feel like I might lose her if I ever ask her what I am for her. She might not even like cuddling, she maybe only wants to have sex with me and likes me because of the stern and dominant attitude I can have.
She could be disappointed if she knew how clingy I can be, how much of a baby boy I can also be or how childish I sometimes seem.
12 pm.
'YOUR P.O.V'
My eyes open after what feels like a long rest, my body aching like never before, my muscles tense and as hard as rocks inside of me. I groan all alone in the bed but take a look at my phone to see what time it is.
As soon as my sleepy eyes land their attention on the screen, the only thing I notice at first is the texts I received from the same number.
< Hey...are you awake? ]
< Oh, I forgot, after you ate no need to wash the dishes. I'll do it and if you want some clothes just look through my closet, in case you don't want to wear the clothes you work with, I washed them this morning with your underwear and bra...Hope you don't mind but I just wanted to make sure you would feel comfortable in your own clothes...❤ ]
I smile at his cuteness, the lack of confidence through his texts melting my heart. I don't leave him on 'read' but answer him right away.
[ I just woke up and feel like a turtle with no energy or muscles...but other than that I'm fine. I'll wash the dishes I use though and thank you for my clothes❤ >
In no time at all, I receive a response when I wouldn't have expected him to be so quick.
< Glad to know you're not mad about it❤ ]
[ Why would I be? >
< Well...because that's your stuff... ]
[ After what we did last night you still care about whether you have the right to touch my underwear or not? >
< Yeah...I have to admit...you're right... ]
[ 😚❤ >
He sends me one last text with a heart so I put my phone down, taking a break after using my hand to hold this device for too long. This wouldn't be a surprise if I stand up and realize I cannot walk.
That already happened to me with my ex-boyfriend but damn, he wasn't that rough and he never made it impossible for me to walk properly.
Whatever, I lift myself up by obligation but the color of my skin around my wrists shock me. Purple and red marks, but those are also visible on my thighs, arms, and hips. What the hell? I didn't expect his hands to leave so many things on me.
I don't really pay attention to it since I kinda like it to not lie to myself and with a lot of effort, I rise from my spot. Have I run all day long yesterday? I don't know if I can't feel my body or if it's so painful that this is numb.
No matter what, I have to take a shower and eat the breakfast that Jungkook cooked for me. It now feels weird to call him Mister Jeon or my boss so this is better to use his name.
1 hour later...
The dishes now washed and placed at a spot that I suppose to be the good one, I clean the table at which I ate but hear a door opening when no one should be here.
My heart stops beating and my blood shoot to my face to make me shake.
"Y/n?" the familiar voice instantly brings my scare down, a sharp sight leaving my lungs that were compressed with anxiousness. For a moment, I thought I was living my last seconds. "Yes?" I answer the man I didn't expect to see so soon, wiping the table one last time as I can hear him getting comfortable.
He doesn't answer anything more so I put the sponge I was holding, on the kitchen counter and head to the living room. "Why have you left work so early?" I peek over the wall, feeling shy after the night we had and the kind of relationship between us that seems a bit unclear.
"Oh...well..." he shrugs but averts my eyes as I noticed a full plastic bag held by his hand. "I wanted to..." he shows another side of him by seeming shy and walks up towards me, his long hair dangling cutely as his head is not raising up.
"Are you okay?" I ask with some worry, not understanding this sudden change of mood. Once he reaches my level, his big eyes meet mine with different emotions from usual, his look seems soft but stressful. "Yes," a smile looking fake forms on his face. "Did you eat well?"
"I did..." I nod but remain doubtful about his answer, so since he's walking into the kitchen to put the stuff down, I follow him from very close. "I see that you took one of my hoodies," he gives me a brief but destabilizing glance, causing a sudden timidity to overwhelm me. "I liked it as soon as I saw it..."
"It suits you," he barely pronounces in an audible voice, taking the items out of their bag. The atmosphere feels cold and I don't know why.
"Do you want me to leave since you're back?" I stand on my spot without moving, fearing that something could have happened and make him feel different towards me. "No, I want you to stay here, otherwise I wouldn't have left my work earlier..."
"Wait..." I frown at his direct answer. "You left just to be with me?" my question gets him to smile but he turns away to open the fridge and out what he bought into it. "Would that be ridiculous?" he doesn't peek at me once. "Not at all...that's cute..."
"You like cute men?" he brings up from out of nowhere, making me wonder what could be happening in his head today. The usual Jungkook would have kissed me, touched me or teased me. "I like cute and sexy men...but most of all...faithful ones."
"Ah...good to know," he shakes his head up and down as if my words had made him feel satisfied and he goes back and forth from the fridge to the table, to put the items at their place.
"What's up with you Jungkook...? Has something bad happened...?" I finally dare to let it out, not liking this weird sensation between us. "Uh?" he turns his head in my direction, eventually laying his eyes on me for some long seconds.
I lift my hands up to make it obvious he's the one acting weird with his behavior, the sleeves of the hoodie covering all my fingers entirely. "Look at yourself...I can see there's a problem..."
"There's not any problem..." he straightens his back but never takes his eyes off of me. I show my annoyance at such a lie and crosses my arms instinctively, before glancing away. "Alright..." leave my mouth and I just get into the living room to not stay here when I can feel how dishonest he is.
"What do you want to eat for dinner today?" the man I thought would not follow my steps stands at the door frame keeping the kitchen and living room apart. However, since I know myself more than anyone, I just head to the stairs. "I don't know but...I won't stay anyway so—"
"Why...?" his voice turns sorrowful. "I thought you would stay here...with me..."
"I don't like to see that you're lying and hiding something so...no..." I give a straightforward explanation, not standing it at all. "Y/n..." his hand runs through his long fluffy hair, the strands softly laying down onto each other to skim his skin. "I just feel weird since this morning...I keep on thinking about a lot of things..."
"About what?" I don't walk up the stairs but wait for him to speak. "It's...I'm just scared this could ruin everything between us..."
"Between us?" a painful sensation pains me, my thoughts messing my mind up and already making me imagine the worst. "Yeah...I mean...I don't know know what you think of me..."
"Jungkook...." I turn towards him but stays on my spot, away from him and each in our own corner of the room. "You did it with another girl? You have a girlfriend and lied to me?"
"What?" his facial expression changes in a sudden, "Of course not y/n, I would never do that. I mean by what I said that I'm scared of the way you might think of our relationship and the fact that if I tell you the way I see it, this could ruin everything..."
"Why are you suddenly thinking about this?" my anxiousness fades away slowly the more he's explaining the problem. "Because...I feel like this isn't right...I don't want a relationship only based on sex...I know you must think I'm ridiculous and less manly for being so sentimental but...I hate this type of 'friends with benefits' thing..." his teeth bite onto his lips, the nervousness readable all through his body language.
Never in my life, I would have expected him to be that type of guy. He looks so tough and authoritative, but also a bit macho and rude. Even though I remember how sweet he was with me two times during the day right after we both had an intimate moment.
A smile forms on my face, the bliss coursing through my body just from realizing that he might be a real man. "You really think I would not like it? And why the hell would you think that you could be ridiculous or less manly because of this? That's the total opposite, you're even manlier and better because that's how a man should be. I don't like that type of relationship either you know...I even told you when we fought..."
"So...you don't only want me for sex...do you?" his puppy gaze breaks my heart, his sweet and lovely side affecting me. "I don't Jungkook."
"But do you love me?" he nibbles on his lips constantly, not leaving these poor red ones alone out of nervousness. I just cannot answer him right away. "Jungkook...I...We both know each other for some months already but I prefer to say that I like you rather than 'love'...after the relationship I had...I don't like using that word so easily anymore..."
"Hm..." he nods to me, still looking a bit disappointed. "I understand...but I love you...even though I know it's a bit fast to say it but I don't care...I just know it's love."
I smile at him but glance away shyly, fearing to be heartbroken again but at the same time, loving those words he's telling me. "So...are you staying here today?" he asks again in a small voice, surprising me nonstop with this soft person he never showed in front of me before. "If you want me to...yes."
"Of course I want," he combs his hair back cutely, clearing his throat afterward. This doesn't match with the Jungkook of yesterday but I still like it. "Then you're going to stand me for longer," I step to the sofa and drop my body on it joyfully, still going gently because of my butt. Jungkook comes up to me without saying anything, to put his arms around me and lie down with me under him.
"I feel weak because of you...this is bad..." he mumbles in the crook of my neck, holding me tight as I hugged him back to both cling onto each other. "Oh. I can make my Master Jeon weak?!" I gasp to act shocked, laughing quietly all by myself. He raises his chin up to face me and kill my eyes with his face but also thrust his body forth on mine. "No. Never you will. You make me weak because I'm Jungkook and not Master Jeon for the moment."
"And where is Master Jeon? He only appears once you're horny?" I grin but watch him staring at my lips as if he was hungry for them, beaming like a baby in front of me. "I'm always horny," his words contrast with his adorable face. "Wow...for some reasons I'm not even surprised."
"Who wouldn't be for you anyway?" he finally pecks my lips, gazing up into my eyes after this tender contact. "Everyone but you."
"Nonsense," he initiates an argument that will probably never end if he doesn't give in to me. "Hell no. I'm always right so you keep quiet," one of my hands move to his mouth to cover it and prevent some words to come out of it but of course, this man cannot hold back from licking it, making me pull it back. "I'm the one right. Do not make me mad by contradicting me or else you know what's gonna happen."
"What's going to happen?" I spur him to give the details, loving when he talks dirty to me. "I'll have to punish you...tie you up to my bed and make love to you till your body is unable to move again."
"I could barely stand up this morning..." I tell him the truth without any shame, knowing that this will massage his ego. "Does your butt still hurt that much?"
"Yeah...a lot...and my entire body..." I nod but look at him with a smile, feeling shy about it even though I like this kind of pain. "I could tell you that I will make love to you tonight, slowly, passionately while kissing you fondly and never being rough but...you know me...once I get excited this is hard to control myself..." he presses his lips on mine, his sayings making me imagine the whole thing in my head but making me lust for it.
•••
My eyes dart towards the front door at the right, far behind the back of the sofa. The doorbell ringing, Jungkook takes his tie off but drops it on me, giving me a daunting smirk before walking to the person hiding behind the door.
I curiously peek at him but once he opens the door, I perceive a familiar voice.